Introduction/Sister with fertility struggles
Nov 22, 2019 11:04:29 GMT -5
Post by kristinh on Nov 22, 2019 11:04:29 GMT -5
Hello! My name is Kristin. I'm 25 years old, from Michigan, and currently a second year medical student. I've been married for 2 almost 3 months now. My husband and I have been together for about 5 years now. We have been trying for a baby since August, we're in the fertile window of month 4 right now.
I do not have any fertility issues that I am aware of. There are a few small things that worry me. I had a LEEP 2 years ago and I've had 6 hernia repairs between ages 5-17. My OB told me these would more be issues with pregnancy itself than getting pregnant.
The issue that I've run into is how to handle things with my sister. It is not my place to disclose the details of her story, however she has had fertility struggles for about 3-4 years now and has lost two. I was upfront with her about when my husband and I would start trying to conceive, so it is not a shock to her. Whenever I'm home, she talks to me about any changes to her medications and how things are going with my cycles. She seems open to talking about both what's going on with her as well as how things are going with me.
I'm just so worried that she'll resent me if I end up pregnant before her. She is the first person I would want to tell. I would want her to be able to process any emotions she has before I surprise the rest of the family. I also know that if any pregnancy I have does not reach viability, she would be able to sympathize with the situation.
I'm struggling to figure out what is the best way to approach this. Do I openly talk with her about anything and ignore her struggles? Do I censor myself to an extent to try and prevent any pain or sadness for her? We didn't have a good relationship until after I left for undergraduate schooling, and I really don't want anything to mess our relationship up.
I do not have any fertility issues that I am aware of. There are a few small things that worry me. I had a LEEP 2 years ago and I've had 6 hernia repairs between ages 5-17. My OB told me these would more be issues with pregnancy itself than getting pregnant.
The issue that I've run into is how to handle things with my sister. It is not my place to disclose the details of her story, however she has had fertility struggles for about 3-4 years now and has lost two. I was upfront with her about when my husband and I would start trying to conceive, so it is not a shock to her. Whenever I'm home, she talks to me about any changes to her medications and how things are going with my cycles. She seems open to talking about both what's going on with her as well as how things are going with me.
I'm just so worried that she'll resent me if I end up pregnant before her. She is the first person I would want to tell. I would want her to be able to process any emotions she has before I surprise the rest of the family. I also know that if any pregnancy I have does not reach viability, she would be able to sympathize with the situation.
I'm struggling to figure out what is the best way to approach this. Do I openly talk with her about anything and ignore her struggles? Do I censor myself to an extent to try and prevent any pain or sadness for her? We didn't have a good relationship until after I left for undergraduate schooling, and I really don't want anything to mess our relationship up.