Bed sharing...gimme details

[nachomomma]

I'm joining the ranks of the bed sharers. Was hoping some of you could tell me how you're doing it, because DS1 slept in his bassinet from the beginning. So here are my questions:
1) do you really take all the covers off the bed? Or just from where baby is sleeping? How do you stay warm? What do you wear to bed? Is baby swaddled?
2) if you bed shared to get through the first six weeks, how did the transition back to a bassinet go? If you're still sharing, when do you plan on moving baby into his own bed?
3) any other advice?

[funinthenorth]

Following this for answer's.

LO is in a cosleeper on bed with me. So in bed but totally seperated. He sleeps so well I don't want to mess it up, plus a few times I've patted his bum and he fell back asleep. dh is still in the guest room. I'll do anything to keep the sleep I'm getting, but my hope was to have him in his crib by 6wks. He's almost 8. There is no logical reason why I shouldn't be able to move his cosleeper into his crib. He likely wouldn't notice but this is Mama is chicken.

[emmyg65]

We bedshared a bit with my son when he was newborn and I was very strict about best practices. We put a bed rail on my side of the bed and he slept between me and the rail. I wrapped the covers around me in a way that they were nowhere near him. And we didn't drink alcohol at all. It was very easy to transition him back to his bassinet.

Now he's 10 weeks old and we just learned he STTN if he's in bed with us. He's much stronger now so I'm not as strict. He sleeps on top of the covers between my husband and me. I don't know how long we'll continue this.

[maebb]

We don't take the covers off, but we kind of make a V with the comforter with him in the middle, so the cover is not on him, but it is on us. I wear long pajama pants and a long-sleeved shirt to bed. DH wears boxers and a t-shirt. DS2 is usually swaddled. I put a light blanket (like Aden and Anias) under him in case he spits up or pees, and also it makes it easy to grab the blanket and slide him over if I need to BF him on one side or the other.

We haven't transitioned to the bassinet or crib yet. We've tried, and sometimes he'll do it for the first stretch, but then I bring him into the bed to nurse, and he just stays the rest of the night. I keep telling myself that we need to do it soon, but it's tough for me to give up the convenience of it and the fact that he sleeps longer.

[littlelion]

1) At night I clear space for baby, no cover or pillow. I place my pillow lengthwise behind me and keep the cover on me and dh. Lo has his own blanket. I wear nightgown to bed No baby isn't swaddled.
2) LO slept in the cosleeper attached to my side of the bed just fine thru 6 wks. I think it was at 7 when he started crying whenever I put him in his cosleeper or the pnp for naps. So at night he wanted to bed share and in the day he slept in my arms. I think it was when he started to sleep longer and less motn feedings (11?) that I was able to get him back into his cosleeper. Now he's 14 weeks and I'd like to get him into his crib in the nursery before 18 wks. He still wakes up at 2:30am to eat so I'm not looking fwd to actually having to wake up to feed him.
3) any other advice? It is easier without dh in bed if that's at all possible. It isn't for us unless I banish dh to the couch.

Oh, but my lo still takes crappy naps unless he's held.

ETA: I place a burp cloth under lo head for bm or drool

[kml218]

We only bed share every now and then. I don't like to do it because I don't sleep very well, but she does so I deal with it. Z starts the night in her bassinet then sometimes moves in bed with us for her MTTN feeding or if she's fussy.
1) no we don't take the covers off. My husband and I have separate blankets so I usually put Z on top of mine with a receiving blanket under her just in case she spits up or has a blowout. Other times I tuck my blanket under me so she's on our sheet with a receiving blanket under her.
We have a changing table that my husband made that I move against the bed and place a long body pillow in front of (so I know where the end of the bed is). I usually sleep on my back when she's in bed so I can lay my arm next to the pillow and put Z between my arm and body. She isn't swaddled but I do cover her with a light "swaddle me" blanket or a receiving blanket and tuck it around her chest (she hates her arms and legs to be locked down). I sleep in a sleeping bra and underwear and H sleeps in his underwear.

2) we started bed sharing a couple nights a week when she was 3 weeks. She is 6 weeks now. She is starting to sleep for longer stretches and I've been able to move her from our bed back to her bassinet but sometimes I have to keep my hand over her chest for awhile.
I plan on moving her into her crib when she can sttn.
3) I agree with littlelion. It is much easier when H isn't in the bed. We have a queen size bed, so H has learned that if he wants to stay in it he has to lay close to the edge of the bed.
Also, if you have an extra receiving blanket lay on it while you sleep and when you want to move your LO into their bed put that down first. The blanket will be warm from your body heat and smell like you. I've done this a few times when I didn't want Z to be in our bed the whole night and it worked great.

[nachomomma]

Thank you for the information everyone. I just wanted to make sure what I was doing was normal. I'm not excited about sleeping with the baby, but I am excited about all the sleep I'm getting now. If you figure out the magic formula for transitioning back into the bassinet/crib, I'd love to hear it

[ShuShuBee]

Glad to see that I am not the only one who hasn't DTD yet. I just got my IUD, so I am on pelvic rest from that for another week.

[BabyStandish]

1) do you really take all the covers off the bed? Or just from where baby is sleeping? How do you stay warm? What do you wear to bed? Is baby swaddled? We don't take the covers off the bed. I put the covers to wear it covers LO's waist and down. I usually wear a nursing bra and a flannel button down shirt that I leave open to bed. That way my shoulders and back stays warm. We don't swaddle the baby.
2) if you bed shared to get through the first six weeks, how did the transition back to a bassinet go? If you're still sharing, when do you plan on moving baby into his own bed? We are still bed sharing at 9 weeks. We usually try to have LO in his sleep n' play bassinet for his first stretch of sleep, but it doesn't always work that way. I usually fall asleep during the MOTN feeding or am too tired/lazy to try to put him back in after he's done. I'd like to transition him to the pack n' play once he's 3 months, but not sure how that'll go. We started with the PnP during his first 2 weeks.
3) any other advice? I don't move around much at night so I don't have to worry rolling onto him. I try to lay on my back once he's done eating so my hips don't kill me. He likes to sleep in my armpit area and my arm goes around him to make sure he doesn't roll over and off the bed. I wake pretty easily so I usually wake up when he starts moving. Right now he only kicks around when he has gas/poop, no rolling yet.

[LaBellaVida]

I bed share. Baby sleeps between me and my h. He is covered with our sheets and blanket, wet do nothing special except keep the blankets away from his face. I wear my regular pajamas to bed. I don't swaddle Liam, never have. We'll transition to a toddler bed next year.

[megan81112]

I do it all wrong. When he does sleep in my bed, I tuck him under my covers right next to me. The boob is right by him so he can latch when needed.

I don't sleep as soundly with him in my bed because I'm so aware of him next to me. But he sleeps great.

[stargirl]

i've only ever bedshared, and now this is baby 3 bedsharing

I typically swaddle her in a muslin with her arms out, naked in a diaper. we sleep on a towel or blanket for spit ups and leaks, I also sleep topless. She sleeps beside me, sorta in my armpit region. I wear pj pants to keep warm, and I have my own blanket for just me that I don't put on her, unless we both feel kinda cold, then ill drape it over her lower body and have her close. (sorta like the V shape blanket thing PP mentioned.)

[lola918]

if you're concerned about blankets, another tip is to pull your comforter down to the bottom of your bed so it only reaches up to mid torso on you (you can tuck it in do you can't pull it up), that way you can't pull it up in your sleep and cover baby. I've had to do that and keep the heat up so I don't get cold and inadvertently cover my son with the blanket. He sleeps on my arm, we side lie for nursing with his head on my upper arm and I fold up my legs under him so he's in a crook of my body and I don't worry about where my husband is or if he's not in the middle when we have to nurse on the side that's by the bed's edge.

[nachomomma]

lola918 That's a good idea to essentially short sheet the bed. Thanks!

[lola918]

Ha nachomomma that's much more succinctly put than my awkward description lol

[calindi]

We did this from about 7 days old until around 7 weeks. Based on my research, swaddling isn't safe because baby needs their hands more in an adult bed - it's softer and there's blankets, so it's better to have hands and legs free to move even ineffectively to combat any obstacle.

We put up a mesh bedrail, and I stuffed a muslin receiving blanket (rolled tight) into the tiny crevice between the rail and the bed to make sure there was no space for him to become trapped if he happened to roll over. I pulled the sheets from the other side of the bed so they would just wrap around my lower body and tuck under me, not reaching him. I wore a high neckline longsleeved cotton shirt on top of a stretchy cotton tank with a soft nursing bra - I'd pull up the shirt and pull down the tank and bra to nurse, but it kept me warm while sleeping.

It's best if baby sleeps on his/her own back, but mine wouldn't due to reflux so I had him propped on my extended arm. The baby should always be between you and the edge of the bed (preferably against a wall) and not between you and another person as no one else is quite as aware at night as a Mom it seems.

Good luck! I hope it works well for you. It worked really well for us, until we transitioned to the crib. Now he loves his crib and no regrets.