BF Monday 3/30

[fishbulb]

Because I need this today.

Not a bitch: Today is J's birthday! We kept a tiny helpless human alive for one year!

Bitch: I'm going to have a hard time enjoying it because my heart is still raw from losing my dog this weekend.

[babycaps]

fishbulb, Congratulations on Doodlebug's Birthday! And again, sorry for your loss!

[babycaps]

@yallow, we need a gif!!


My bitch: DH stays home with LO every morning until about 11-12am. It's starting to wear on him. Maybe this is more of an FFMC, I wish LO was down to one long nap so that DH can get a break and start taking LO to daycare earlier in the day and have more time to get his work done. He's been AMAZING this past year, taking care of LO so I can work a full day and in the mean time, he's quite isolated at home most days and starting to feel the effects of no longer working in an office with some other people. I wish LO slept better at daycare. But the times we have dropped him off for a full day have turned into disaster-type nap days where LO naps only 45min instead of a total of 3hrs. and then he's up several times in the night. Sleep really begets freakin' sleep!

My other bitch: We need a carwash. VERY badly. But either the lines for a carwash are 10-15 cars long or it's too cold out!

[yalllow]

Now my oldest has pneumonia. 

I have the coughing crap and I'm pretty sure I had food poisoning which took me out of work for two days. NOT HOW I LIKE USING PTO

[bsouls]

fishbulb sorry for your loss, but congrats on your milestone. Babies are hard!

My mom came in on Saturday and will be staying until the end of April - two weeks early due to my grandpa's passing. Yeah, we have already had words. Since there is no place else to really hang, everyone is at my mom's condo (which we are living at). We are a loud fucking family and don't even use indoor voices during normal conversations. Everyone forgot what it was like to have a baby - T just "needs to deal with the noise during naps." My mom and aunt have questioned some parenting choices or the way we do shit - well, too late, we've been feeding her this stuff for months.

Then last night I discussed with my mom that's it'd be awesome if she could babysit until 11-noon to ensure the boyfriend gets a good nap Tuesday through Friday. Nope, can't guarantee that - she likes to go get a coffee about 10am every day (even though she had to have a Keurig last year). So, pretty much you just want to say you love your grandchildren, buy them shit - but, you can't change your routine to help out. If she doesn't realize that she's fucked up then it's going to hurt our relationship - she already pissed me off in October when she wouldn't help out when we were house hunting. I understand how my mom is and her anxieties, but she needs to push through them to help her children, especially since we hardly ask for anything.

I guess I'm still really pissed off.

[ellabee]

yalllow - hope you guys all get better soon!

fishbulb and bsouls - I'm so sorry for both of your losses.

Just a small bitch from me today. We had DDs bday party over the weekend and instead of opening all the gifts, we asked if any of our guests had any gifts they'd like for us to open during the party. There were only a few. After the party, DH loaded all of the gifts into the car, but in the interest of making only a few trips he put some wrapped gifts in other gift bags and all of the cards got mixed up. Now I'm left trying to figure out who gave DD what.

Oh I guess I have one more. DD has been fighting her first nap lately. What gives? Could it really be she's already working on the 1 nap transition?? I guess if she is that's fine, since she will be moving to the next room in daycare soon and they only do 1 nap there...but it's early right? I like having 2 nap times on the weekends...

[ellabee]

Also, bsouls I totally feel you on the grandparents thing. My FIL spent YEARS pestering us about giving him a grandchild and now that she's here he can't be bothered to spend more than 30 seconds playing with her. He's always off balancing his books or doing some other boring thing that could totally wait until we left. Grrr.

[yalllow]

[younglove316]

@ellabee I had a moment of panic yesterday when I was pretty sure that DD was cutting out naps all together. Lately she's been fighting them extra hard and will give in but yesterday she just had no interest at all. She napped for a total of 25 minutes all day, thankfully she wasn't too bad though.

I do think she might be cutting down to 1 though as she's only sleeping 15-20 minutes now in the afternoon. I'm just trying to push the morning one back now if that's the case.

[bebeski]

Damn insomnia (me). Damn molars/cold/4 shots/diarrhea. You are making my baby feel awful!

[human1]

Sorry about your dog, fishbulb. Happy birthday to your kiddo

[kimberpoo]

*knock on wood* my day has really started going better since I headed back to the office. This morning started rough though! I pulled out of my driveway and my lunch, which I forgot on top of the car, went everywhere. then I spilled coffee down my shirt and seatbelt (thank goodness I'm wearing black!) I had to get up extra early to get to a 9 am court hearing in a bad neighborhood in which I usually try to avoid. then I stopped at babies r us to return something since I had to go past it on my way back to the office and it was stinkin closed...they don't open until 10
on the ups - court was super fast and easy. settlement agreements for the win.
I got a free birthday drink from coffee cabin. it's a peach smoothie and super yummy.
it's supposed to be warmer and sunny today, and I'm leaving early for a doc appt which means I'll get lo early enough to go to the park! *FX that doc appt is fast and easy and park is fun!*

[human1]

Went to my ILs for dinner for MHs bday. Get there and my SIL shows up with her feverish, throwing up, very ill son. Keep those germs at home! It's not freaking Christmas, the kid would not have minded missing dinner for an adult relative he's not particularly close with and couldn't eat anyways. Poor dude laid on the couch all miserable all night. And the 4 other little kids, one of which is a 7 week old infant with a preemie immune system, don't need to risk getting sick. Wtf.
What's super frustrating about is is this SIL and her family do this all the time with no regard to the rest of the family, because "illness is part of having kids, get used to it." At A's first bday, they came after their son was vomiting and having diarrhea all day. DD1 got sick 2 days later, followed by me, then MH, then the baby, which we ended up at the ER with. A couple weeks before that it was an outing with the kids and they brought their son with strep and pinkeye, which other SILs daughter got a few days later. Seriously, if you're actively sick, STAY HOME.

/rant.

[karebear]

It has just been a rough couple of weekends with DH. We got into another argument but thankfully we didn't have to buy another door. We are just in this bad rut like babycaps said and it sucks!!! We have vacation together in June and I am looking forward to hopefully having the spark come back and reconnecting. Every marriage has its lulls, and we will get past it, but its not fun being in the valley!!

[linzerd]

Mar 30, 2015 11:18:08 GMT -5 human1 said:

At A's first bday, they came after their son was vomiting and having diarrhea all day. DD1 got sick 2 days later, followed by me, then MH, then the baby, which we ended up at the ER with. A couple weeks before that it was an outing with the kids and they brought their son with strep and pinkeye, which other SILs daughter got a few days later. Seriously, if you're actively sick, STAY HOME.

Ummm wut? Wtf is wrong with people? "Whatever, kids get sick, so I'm bringing them around all of you (including said 7 wk old preemie) so deal with it", sounds pretty self absorbed to me. Not to mention her poor kid! Who wants to go to a party and lay on the couch sick the whole time or have it coming out both ends? What she should have asked herself first was if she would go to a party feeling like that!

fishbulb and the other person who lost their gramps (sorry I can go back and check right now I'm on mobile) I'm sorry for your losses!

babycaps I feel your pain for your husband, I'm working at home And I previously WAHed from 2007-2010 and it is very isolating, especially being a new mom considering they say motherhood is the loneliest job in the world. Most weeks the only people I see are my DC provider, MH, and my parents.

My only Bf for today is that it's snowing/raining a frozen mix out there. WHEN WILL IT EVER END? It's nearly April for fuck's sake. There will seriously still be snow melting in July, I'm sure of it. Fuck you sideways winter of 2015!!!!

[nattybumppo]

kimberpoo, - i love food left on top of car stories! (sorry, of course, but I did LOL too)

human1, - whaaaaat? With a BABY?!?! I'm relatively lax on germs, but I always try to be considerate and give a heads up or stay home or whatever (depending on the situation) because you never know what someone else's immune system is like or the immune system of people close to them. (We have a friend who has a strong immune system but her very old, immune compromised parents live with her so if she got sick, it could be a big deal.)

My bitch is that DD1 hasn't napped in days. This better just be a phase and not the beginning of the end. Things are tough enough around here as it is right now with DH gone....my non-napping 3 year old doesn't help out at all.

[babycaps]

I have another Bitch.
our day care is closed Friday. For Good Friday. WTF?? They are closed on every MINOR holiday. I'm not off work but my boss will be gone so I was planning on getting my hair done (finally) Friday afternoon. And now I can't bc we don't have daycare.
UGH

[lakecountrygal]

DS is refusing to nap today and I have so much to do this afternoon.

Also DH keeps flipping between trying for 1 more in 6-8 months and being one-and-done. I'm not pushing him either way, but damn quit constantly changing your mind so I can decide if I want to go back on BC or not.

[mrssmith613]

We're having LOs bday party on Sunday. I mentioned one time to my mom that maybe we should have it at my grandpa's since he has a nice garage and you never know how the weather is gonna be. Well, my mom has a big mouth and she told my grandpa and everybody else that we were having it at his house. Ultimately, we decided to have it at our house and if it's nice out we'll have it outside if it's not we'll have it inside. So I send out the invitations that it will be at our house. Yesterday my brother tells me my grandpa told him that he hopes it rains on Sunday. All I can think is fuck him, he's just mad because he's selfish and because it's inconvienant for him because he thinks everyone must work there lives around him. I hope he doesn't come.

[fishbulb]

Thanks again everyone. I arranged today to donate her unused kibble and treats to a local rescue organization. It makes me feel good to know that they won't go to waste.

I also got a call from her regular vet today (he was out of town last week when she went downhill fast, so she saw other vets). He told me that based on her symptoms and how she got so ill so quickly that she was too sick to have saved no matter what we did. I knew that I think, but it made me feel a lot better to have that verified by a professional.

[linzerd]

Mar 30, 2015 14:57:28 GMT -5 @highpeak said:

My kid won't nap, and she's trying her fucking best not to sleep at night too, we're into another hour and a half of trying....again!

I've even given her neurofen for teething, and gripe water for gas, but NOTHING is working. I'm so pissed off, at her, and I don't want to be, I hate being pissed off with her, but damn, she's really testing my fucking patience lately!

I feel your pain. All of a sudden, the past couple of weeks, it's taking an hour, hour and a half or tonight...2.5 hours to nurse her to sleep and I'm getting legit wicked pissed off at her. I don't know what the fuck to do and I feel like I'm losing my mind.

[younglove316]

Mar 30, 2015 14:57:28 GMT -5 @highpeak said:

My kid won't nap, and she's trying her fucking best not to sleep at night too, we're into another hour and a half of trying....again!

I've even given her neurofen for teething, and gripe water for gas, but NOTHING is working. I'm so pissed off, at her, and I don't want to be, I hate being pissed off with her, but damn, she's really testing my fucking patience lately!

I'm sorry you are dealing with this, I feel your pain. I'm still doing naps on me because I can't handle her going without a nap and nothing we've tried has worked.

As for bedtime I still rock her but she wakes up and is awake when I'm putting her in. She cried the first time for about 10 minutes but not after about a week we are down to about a minute or two of crying. I'm still nervous though to just put her in the crib wide awake. I suck at this!

[ellabee]

Mar 31, 2015 7:28:31 GMT -5 younglove316 said:

Mar 30, 2015 14:57:28 GMT -5 @highpeak said:

My kid won't nap, and she's trying her fucking best not to sleep at night too, we're into another hour and a half of trying....again!

I've even given her neurofen for teething, and gripe water for gas, but NOTHING is working. I'm so pissed off, at her, and I don't want to be, I hate being pissed off with her, but damn, she's really testing my fucking patience lately!

I'm sorry you are dealing with this, I feel your pain. I'm still doing naps on me because I can't handle her going without a nap and nothing we've tried has worked.

As for bedtime I still rock her but she wakes up and is awake when I'm putting her in. She cried the first time for about 10 minutes but not after about a week we are down to about a minute or two of crying. I'm still nervous though to just put her in the crib wide awake. I suck at this!

DD used to nap in her crib just fine, but since she's been fighting them recently we've had more naps in the car and on me or DH. The instant we try to put her in her crib she is 100% awake and ready to play. Same goes for bedtime...sigh.... 

[linzerd]

Mar 31, 2015 4:01:44 GMT -5 @highpeak said:

Mar 30, 2015 23:28:48 GMT -5 linzerd said:

I feel your pain. All of a sudden, the past couple of weeks, it's taking an hour, hour and a half or tonight...2.5 hours to nurse her to sleep and I'm getting legit wicked pissed off at her. I don't know what the fuck to do and I feel like I'm losing my mind.

Yeah, I don't know what to do either, but I've decided to try a gentle sleep training! We start bedtime at 7.30pm with her last bottle, then I take her to bed (awake), then as soon as I put her down, she starts kicking her legs, flapping her arms and laughing, within a minute, she standing up, so I lie her back down saying 'it's bedtime' about 10 times! Then I'll pick her up (because by this point she'll be crying a bit), wait until she's calm, and start the whole thing again! It takes about 2 hours, but I'm not rocking her to sleep anymore! I want her to learn to fall asleep on her own, but I still refuse to CIO! I'm giving it 4 weeks of this before I try something else, I don't know what else I'll try yet, but I'll start looking for other ways next week (just incase)!

As for naps, well, I have no fucking clue! She won't even be rocked to sleep for those anymore!

I'm exhausted! So is DH! But I know I'm one of the lucky ones still, because he does exactly half the work, and he still gets up in the night if she wakes (we take turns). I'm praying this is either just a short phase, or I can sleep train her fast, because there is very little fuel left in this tank!

Good luck to you, and if you find anything that works (barring CIO) PLEASE let me know


Oh I definitely will, and you do the same please!  I've resorted to trying some sleep training too, I'm reading "Sleep Easy" and I don't really want to do CIO, but honestly for my sanity I can't spend 2.5 hours lying in there with her trying to nurse her to sleep.  It's too much and unfortunately I also have work to do at night since I work at home so I really can't stop for that long or I will be chained to the computer until midnight!  Not to mention that she does sleep for 7 hours straight and then wakes up and it takes 1, 2, 3,  or even 4 hours to get her back down.  Last night she was down at 10:30 up at 5:15 and then back down at 7:00, we slept until 10.  Which means she doesn't get to DC til' 11:15 and here it is noon and I'm just starting work (after I take the dogs out right now)!  This blows!

[kimberpoo]

nattybumppo if you love lost lunch stories, you would've loved to watch me pull out of the driveway yesterday! I almost took a pic. I had leftover Mexican in one of those Styrofoam containers and the top of the car was wet, so it FLEW off the top of the car and made a giant, glorious splat all over the cement. beans, rice, the whole shebang. such a shame, it was so good! I bet the birds and raccoons loved it.

[kimberpoo]

@highpeak I'm so sorry your lo is having trouble sleeping! that sucks!! my lo still has a rough night here and there, but overall he does pretty well. we now have a good bedtime routine down and I find that wearing him out during the day helps too. our routine is changing into pj's, warm bottle, walk into dark bedroom. I'll turn on his white noise machine (it's set super quiet) and give him a pacifier. I'll rock him back and forth for less than 30 seconds then lay him in his crib. some nights I'll rub his back for a minute or lay my hand on him so he relaxes after I lay him down. then I walk out. I try to walk out when he isn't looking at me (eyes closed or looking the other way) as this seems to lessen/eliminate crying.
he's so used to our routine that he starts rubbing his eyes as soon as we walk into the bedroom with the lights off. I used to rock him to sleep / keep hands on until he fell asleep / etc but it was soooo time consuming and he would pop up the minute I tried to walk out. I was very anti-CIO at first but after a week or so letting him fuss for at least 10-15 mins (not freak-out crying, just that protesting cry/fuss) then walking back in silently, putting pacifier back in, laying him down, walking right back out again, he started going down much easier on his own.
each baby is different though! don't get discouraged. lots of love to you and your lo!