Can We Talk Names?

[Squishy622]

It's early for me to be thinking about this, but now that I know we're having girls, my mind has gone straight to names. It's so overwhelming! It was a challenge for us to agree on a first and middle name for DD. And now the prospect of finding 2 first and middle names that go well together, go well with our last name, and go well with DD's name feels monumental.

For those of you who have been through it, I'm curious how you tackled this with your SO. Did it come naturally to you (ie family names) or did you go about it systematically with lists, etc.? I should add that I'm thrilled to have this "problem"... just love talking about it and would love to hear thoughts!

[elvenqueen]

DH and I had a boy first and middle name and a girl first and middle name picked before we knew it was twins. I started to panic and look for more names at that point, anticipating that we'd have two boys or two girls. So far it looks like we get to stick with our original choices, but we had lots picked to choose from.

I kept a piece of paper by my desk and jotted names down as I thought of them or read about them, then I'd read them to DH and cross out ones he hated. We came up with about 10 for each sex, so it just became a matter of finding a good combination, both first and middles together as well as twins' names together.

It definitely helps to know what things don't work with your last name, out loud or written down. I also tried to do the Jewish thing of using a name to honour a late family member, either with their name, a similar name, or using the same first letter like my family did. It sort of opened up more ideas for me. My FIL's name was Frank, so we considered Frederick and Finley, which I don't think I ever would have thought of because F just isn't a letter I would go to... if that makes sense.

But yeah, you've got loads of time!

ETA: this is sort of specific to our circumstances, but we also thought about getting any girl names to go with DH's daughter's name. Her middle name is Daisy, so I thought it'd be cute to have only flower middle names for any girls. Again, opened up a lot of potentials because I probably wouldn't have considered Poppy otherwise!

[anakah]

The twins are named after DH's late grandparents and we picked random middle names that we liked that went well with their first names. DS2 on the other hand was a beast to name because we had already used our favorite names on the twins. We weren't planning on more kids at the time. Some days I feel like DS2 got the short end of the name stick though since its essentially two random names that we eventually agreed on the week before he was born. Picking names is hard!

[mrsp419]

Oh names. This has been such a struggle for DH and I with all of our babies. I like a lot of names and put a lot of thought into them. DH nixes a lot of names because he "doesn't like how it sounds," and then doesn't offer many suggestions. The prospect of naming twins was daunting. Leftover from previous pregnancies, we had a boy and girl name, and also names for boy/boy twins. Of course our twins were girl/girl. We have two other kids so I wanted the names to at least flow well together. Basically, I took our girls name that we were 80% sure of, went on my birth month board and baby names board on TD, and said "we are having twins. One is named _____. What should I name the other one." And one name, one that I honestly never even liked before, grabbed me and stuck. We played around with random middle names that just kind of sounded well, but ultimately went with family names for middle names.

[wamom]

Middle names are family names and DH picked out their first names. I think I was burnt out after picking out our older kids names I just let him go for it. Obviously we had to both like them but he pretty much named them.

[Deleted]

I started thinking about/highlighting names in a book before we had even started trying for a baby. When we (finally!) became pregnant, we chose a girl name within a week of our BFP. I had always loved Ashley for a girl, and Rose for a middle name because it's beautiful AND my grandmother's name. So Ashley Rose became our name. We couldn't agree on a boy name, so we shelved the name discussion until the anatomy scan - the idea of trying to choose one more girl name and two boy names was overwhelming.

Once we found out that both babies were girls, DH decided that he liked Samantha Lynn (Lynn being my middle name). But then my mother happened to mention the name Kayla and DH fell head over heels for the name. We both thought Dawn was beautiful, but only liked it in the middle name spot. So we agreed that Baby B would be Kayla Dawn (second name picked, second baby to be born - especially if I had delivered vaginally since she was higher up. (I wound up with a C-section - both breech - but Kayla was still born second.)

[bluebonnet22]

I do agree that twin names are really hard! We always had our boy and our girl name (William & Catherine - both family names), but for obvious reasons cannot use them on b/g twins! I will say in some ways we found same sex twins to be easier to name (when we were coming up with lists) because DH and I each got to pick our favorite name for one baby. I second the PP who mentioned going on the baby name board once you get one twin named and asking for suggestions. They are crazy helpful and definitely make it easier! I've gotten so many great ideas from that board. I do think it's smart you're starting early. I've changed my mind 100x since finding out it's twins and I'm starting to panic now that I'm 25 weeks!

[nomnom]

I started a google spreadsheet several years ago to collect names I like as I run across them. I figured someday I'd have kids and it'd be handy. Now DH and I just have to negotiate on which ones to use :-)

[Squishy622]

Thanks everyone for your thoughtful responses!

elvenqueen we are Jewish as well. We used up initials on DD's name and Hebrew name after deceased relatives, and she is very lucky to still have mostly living great-grandparents. So it's either honor a random-ish relative who we never knew, or nix the tradition.

@twinstars you bring up a good point about which name to assign to which twin if they're the same sex! I've wondered how people make that decision; I like your method of using the first name picked on the first one out.

[elvenqueen]

Squishy622, Do you have any family trees written down? I've gone back to a great-great-great uncle for our boy's middle name -- not to honour him per se, but because I actually really liked it. Might be a good place to find some inspiration.

[Squishy622]

That's a great idea, elvenqueen, I think my grandmother has one that her cousin made a while ago. I will ask her, thanks!

[neongreen]

We'd always talked about using family names in the middle name slot - a girl would have my grandmother's name as a middle name (which is also my mother's middle name) and a boy would have DH's grandfather's name as a middle name (which is also his middle name). Then surprise, g/g twins!

So we'll be using his grandmother's name for the other middle name. For first names, we had one picked out already. For the other, I made a short list, we looked through some lists on websites together, and went with his favorite off the short list I made. Not too bad.

But if we were having boys, we'd probably still be hashing it out for both, because we have very different opinions on boy names.

[cml112]

We came up with about 5-6 boys names that we like, so we could double up and have enough from the list for middle names. Girls names are tough!! We have 2 girls names and only 1 potential middle name. I find girls names are harder because I want something that ages well and not cutesie, but also not something I associate with my geriatric patients.

So we are taking a break till the anatomy scan and then we will start narrowing down.

[samantha24]

When we found out we were having twins we agreed on a boy name immediately. DH is a Jr so the oldest/first born boy would be the third(III). Then DH gave me free range to name the second baby(ended up being another boy) whatever I wanted. I stuck with family names from my side, I picked my grandfathers name and my fathers middle name for his middle name. But I agree picking names can be hard! Especially making sure their full names sound good.

[ashb62]

DD was easy. I fell in love with her name before I even met DH. Thankfully, he agreed.

When we found out about the twins, I kept a running list of girl and boy names. DH kind of frustrated me, because he disliked a lot of names, but never really suggested any. It was important to me that the names flow well without being too matchy and sounded good as a sibset with DD.

We found out Baby B was a boy first. A wouldn't show us the goods. I let H choose B's first name (a name he loved, and I liked well enough) with the understanding that I could name the other baby. (There was a girl name that I LOVED, but he was just meh about.) So, in the end we each picked a first name we loved and the other was okay with.

Middle names took us FOREVER, but we ended up using DH's name for A and a variation of my dad's for B.

We named them in utero and their names totally suit them and I love both of their names now.

[anotherdreamer]

We did lists. We had a leftover name or two from when we were deciding DS's name, so we went from there. I wanted something that went well together, but wasn't too matchy. We used our girl name from DS's pregnancy because we both loved it, and the middle name honored my niece who passed away. Primary names were easy, the second names were much harder (we were team green, so needed two of each gah). We went through old family names and website lists, I wanted classic names so going through old family names was fun.

[mrsf0831]

Mar 31, 2015 9:58:31 GMT -5 bluebonnet22 said:

I do agree that twin names are really hard! We always had our boy and our girl name (William & Catherine - both family names), but for obvious reasons cannot use them on b/g twins! I will say in some ways we found same sex twins to be easier to name (when we were coming up with lists) because DH and I each got to pick our favorite name for one baby. I second the PP who mentioned going on the baby name board once you get one twin named and asking for suggestions. They are crazy helpful and definitely make it easier! I've gotten so many great ideas from that board. I do think it's smart you're starting early. I've changed my mind 100x since finding out it's twins and I'm starting to panic now that I'm 25 weeks!

Why can't you use those names on b/g twins?

[ashb62]

Apr 6, 2015 12:40:43 GMT -5 mrsf0831 said:

Mar 31, 2015 9:58:31 GMT -5 bluebonnet22 said:

I do agree that twin names are really hard! We always had our boy and our girl name (William & Catherine - both family names), but for obvious reasons cannot use them on b/g twins! I will say in some ways we found same sex twins to be easier to name (when we were coming up with lists) because DH and I each got to pick our favorite name for one baby. I second the PP who mentioned going on the baby name board once you get one twin named and asking for suggestions. They are crazy helpful and definitely make it easier! I've gotten so many great ideas from that board. I do think it's smart you're starting early. I've changed my mind 100x since finding out it's twins and I'm starting to panic now that I'm 25 weeks!

Why can't you use those names on b/g twins?

I assume because of Prince William and Catherine (Kate) Middleton.

I made the connection immediately, but I don't think it's a huge deal since they're fairly common names.

[kcwalza]

I'm stuck trying to come up with two girl names as well! We had all boy names picked out..my husband is italian and seems to lean towards italian names but I feel like most of them are so over used! Oh well, like OP said its a good problem to have

[mrsf0831]

Apr 6, 2015 12:53:37 GMT -5 ashb62 said:

Apr 6, 2015 12:40:43 GMT -5 mrsf0831 said:

Why can't you use those names on b/g twins?

I assume because of Prince William and Catherine (Kate) Middleton.

I made the connection immediately, but I don't think it's a huge deal since they're fairly common names.

I had a feeling that may have been the reason but call me oblivious I wasn't 100% sure of their names lol