Other parents drive me nuts!

[wormgerm]

There was this kid, maybe around 8 or 9, who kept playfully kicking his dad or whoever in the butt to leave a dust print on his butt. They both thought it was funny and the adult was playing right in to it. They were all over the place and taking up too much room. I had NO patience for this horseplay in the dairy section. GTFO of my way and act like a human when you're in a crowded area.

[veggiemo]

My child runs off at the grocery store. It's so embarrassing and he gets in people's way and I spend the whole time trying to wrangle him. It's awful. Last weekend he picked out a doughnut that he wanted. So I gave him a couple warnings that if he didn't behave and sit in the cart, I was getting rid of the doughnut. He immediately tried to run off so I put him in the cart and he screamed, followed by a spit. Doughnut went bye-bye. He cried the entire car ride home and for at least 10 minutes once we got in the door. It suuuucks. But I just don't know what to do. Nothing seems to fucking work and I'm at my wits end.

[veggiemo]

Apr 1, 2015 11:57:22 GMT -5 @jemomma said:

Apr 1, 2015 11:09:22 GMT -5 veggiemo said:

My child runs off at the grocery store. It's so embarrassing and he gets in people's way and I spend the whole time trying to wrangle him. It's awful. Last weekend he picked out a doughnut that he wanted. So I gave him a couple warnings that if he didn't behave and sit in the cart, I was getting rid of the doughnut. He immediately tried to run off so I put him in the cart and he screamed, followed by a spit. Doughnut went bye-bye. He cried the entire car ride home and for at least 10 minutes once we got in the door. It suuuucks. But I just don't know what to do. Nothing seems to fucking work and I'm at my wits end.

Isn't your DS still pretty young? I expect that behavior from little guys since they really don't know any better yet. My DD does the same thing, she's 2. She refuses to sit in the cart and throws a screaming fit if I make her. She also likes to run around the store, although we are working on that - I let her ride on the edge of the cart, which she seems to like, or help me put the groceries in the cart. My DS did the same when he was around 2 and he is soooo much better now (he's 3).  

Now, if your kid was 10 years old doing that, I would totally side eye you.

Yeah, he's 2.5. It just seems like there are always these kids around his age sitting nicely in the cart. I've been bringing fruit snacks and that occupies him for 5 minutes, then he wants out again. He's great at helping to put things in the cart (although lately he's been throwing, almost hit a bystander with a jar of mayo) and of course he LOVES putting the stuff on the belt for checkout. But I can only distract him with those things briefly and then he's off and running. I kept thinking this would get easier as the years went on, but it's not. We go grocery shopping every weekend and I just don't understand why he can't figure out how to behave when we do it so often. Some trips are better than others, but overall the experience is not good.

[lunalovegood]

I tease my dad that he has gotten soft as he's gotten older because he gives into my younger siblings (12 and 10 years old) as soon as they start whinning about something. I absolutely hate when parents do that though because it teaches kids really fast that all they need to do is whine to get what they want. I come down pretty hard on them when I am around and they start to whine and they really don't try to do it with me anymore. I am the mean big sister I guess.

[junch817]

I totally feel for the parents when it's just one kid acting all crazy, especially when they are younger. But even some older kids too, because I know that you just never know if the kid has any issues. A spitting 10 year old used to cause my jaw to hit the floor, but now, I try to remind myself that the kid may have some serious issues and try not to judge.
However
I am totally with pbubblegum in it drives me CRAZY when multiple kids are just running around a store and their parents aren't doing a thing to stop it. That gets under my skin sooooo bad!! I would never allow my children to act like they are at a playground while out in public like that. Never never never. I just don't get how those parents seem to not give a damn. It's so embarrassing to me!

[kimberlyandthor2014]

I feel the same way about other people and their kids! And age does make a HUGE difference. Toddlers can be a nightmare and very difficult to wrangle and predict, so that stuff never bothers me. It does bother me when I see a toddler throwing tantrums and the parent giving in to them, and giving them more power. I would prefer to hear a toddler crying and screaming and throwing a fit than to see him or her get his way or be coddled when acting that way. It's very tough to mom toddlers. It's much like wrestling an alligator.

Older kids, on the other hand, don't have the same leeway with me. And I'm not a huge helicopter mom. Childhood is meant for fun and exploration, but there is a time and a place. If my daughter is doing anything to disrupt or bother someone (legitimately, not just by her mere existence--cuz lets face it some people just hate kids in general and act like assholes when a kid is anywhere near them) I will put a stop to it immediately. I used to work at a furniture store and in the clearance room I would be completely shocked that parents would let their kids JUMP ON THE FURNITURE and terrorize the room! I wanted to smack those people!

[belle0720]

I generally try not to judge other parents. A kid throwing a tantrum in public is probably inevitable for any parent. They're kids and it happens.

Buut, a couple of parents annoyed me when I went to my nephew's kindergarten class play last week. It was a <15 minute play and shouldn't have been that hard to get through.

But a little girl kept running in front of the stage and trying talk to her sister who was on stage, touching the decorations that were taped on the front edge of the stage, and even opened the doors to the storage under the stage and tried to pull out the tables/chairs. I kept wondering where the hell her parents were, and finally after she had almost pulled stuff out of the storage, her mom ran up to grab her. But then she just came back and her mom let her run around until it was over.

Also, there were people who handed their kid their phone and let him watch a cartoon (or something) with full volume. Give that kid some headphones, it's hard enough to hear these little kids speak on stage without that to compete with!

[dmoney]

Apr 1, 2015 12:36:52 GMT -5 junch817 said:

I totally feel for the parents when it's just one kid acting all crazy, especially when they are younger. But even some older kids too, because I know that you just never know if the kid has any issues. A spitting 10 year old used to cause my jaw to hit the floor, but now, I try to remind myself that the kid may have some serious issues and try not to judge.
However
I am totally with pbubblegum in it drives me CRAZY when multiple kids are just running around a store and their parents aren't doing a thing to stop it. That gets under my skin sooooo bad!! I would never allow my children to act like they are at a playground while out in public like that. Never never never. I just don't get how those parents seem to not give a damn. It's so embarrassing to me!

 So I'm an advisor for a youth group and I was staffing a conference and i walked into a seminar that I was supposed to be staffing and all of a sudden i hear this Kid yell a bunch of profanities.  My immediate response is Who just said that, come here right now.  The child comes up to me apologizes but explains that he has terrets and cant help it.  Even started to pull a card that he has from his Doctor out of his wallet.  I felt like a complete idiot, granted I had no idea that he had this issue. But still it goes back to your point junch817 that you just never know what anyone has going on. Someone could look 100% "normal" and in reality they have something wrong with them. 

[dmoney]

I hate when I go to a restaurant and I see every kid at the table with a different electronic device to keep them quiet... Seriously?? What happened to crayons and coloring books? I remember playing hang man or tick tack toe with my parents when we were out to eat. When did it become socially acceptable for technology to "keep our children behaved" No, you should teach them. Yes there are times where you cant help it and if a kid has a melt down its going to happen.

[alayne926]

Apr 1, 2015 9:59:20 GMT -5 @jemomma said:

There are some things that other parents do that I just cannot handle.

DH and I took the kids out to lunch a couple days ago and I saw something that just drives me bonkers! A mom and dad were dining with their three kids, all under age 10. Both mom and dad had gigantic alcoholic drinks...at lunchtime...with their kids present...and no designated driver. I cannot stand it when I see this, and I see it quite often. Why endanger your children and other innocent lives to have a cocktail with your lunch??? One of you can't abstain? I just don't get it.

Anyone else have anything that other parents do that drive you crazy?

Maybe this is flameable, but if they are having ONE drink while they are eating, I don't see the problem in this.  DH and I normally alternate who's drinking with a meal (obviously, it's not been me for a while) but when we're on vacation we both may have one drink during a meal when DS is with us.

Of course, if they are both getting hammered during their meal with their child(ren) with them, there's a problem and not OK. 

[ajm11]

Apr 1, 2015 12:10:37 GMT -5 veggiemo said:

Apr 1, 2015 11:57:22 GMT -5 @jemomma said:

Isn't your DS still pretty young? I expect that behavior from little guys since they really don't know any better yet. My DD does the same thing, she's 2. She refuses to sit in the cart and throws a screaming fit if I make her. She also likes to run around the store, although we are working on that - I let her ride on the edge of the cart, which she seems to like, or help me put the groceries in the cart. My DS did the same when he was around 2 and he is soooo much better now (he's 3).  

Now, if your kid was 10 years old doing that, I would totally side eye you.

Yeah, he's 2.5. It just seems like there are always these kids around his age sitting nicely in the cart. I've been bringing fruit snacks and that occupies him for 5 minutes, then he wants out again. He's great at helping to put things in the cart (although lately he's been throwing, almost hit a bystander with a jar of mayo) and of course he LOVES putting the stuff on the belt for checkout. But I can only distract him with those things briefly and then he's off and running. I kept thinking this would get easier as the years went on, but it's not. We go grocery shopping every weekend and I just don't understand why he can't figure out how to behave when we do it so often. Some trips are better than others, but overall the experience is not good.

We had a similar experience at the grocery store this week, and my DD is 2.5 also. She has always hated to ride in the cart or stroller. She's gotten a little better about it lately, but I usually just go for the shopping cart with the little car in the front, and she seems to do really well in those. Other than that, I have no advice, just big hugs. I always look at the other kids riding peacefully in the cart and wonder what the secret is, lol.

[redlipz]

On Sunday we went to Costco and there was a couple sitting on the water bottle cases. They had 3 or 4 kids with them and they were all climbing on the cases and trying to move them around, they said nothing to these kids! Like seriously? I looked over at them and shook my head and the woman just made a face. I told one of the kids that he needed to get off. They still let them do as they pleased.

[alayne926]

Apr 1, 2015 15:58:54 GMT -5 @jemomma said:

Apr 1, 2015 14:11:14 GMT -5 alayne926 said:

Maybe this is flameable, but if they are having ONE drink while they are eating, I don't see the problem in this.  DH and I normally alternate who's drinking with a meal (obviously, it's not been me for a while) but when we're on vacation we both may have one drink during a meal when DS is with us.

Of course, if they are both getting hammered during their meal with their child(ren) with them, there's a problem and not OK. 

To each their own.  If you know your tolerance and are comfortable doing that, then that's your decision.  I personally would never even have one drink if my DH was drinking as well.  I grew up in a family of alcoholics, and had been driven around by a drunk parent many times.  I guess that's why it bothers me so much. Just a personal pet peeve.

There's a huge difference in having one drink and then driving drunk with your kid(s) in the car.

Like you said, to each their own...

[dogmama22]

Apr 1, 2015 14:04:56 GMT -5 dmoney said:

I hate when I go to a restaurant and I see every kid at the table with a different electronic device to keep them quiet... Seriously?? What happened to crayons and coloring books? I remember playing hang man or tick tack toe with my parents when we were out to eat. When did it become socially acceptable for technology to "keep our children behaved" No, you should teach them. Yes there are times where you cant help it and if a kid has a melt down its going to happen.

This! I may end up eating my words someday on this, but right now it drives me crazy! When I nanny for people that are out of town and take the kids out to eat, we do all of the old school coloring, tic tac toe and hangman. I really avoid using my phone as a babysitter and hope to continue that with my own LO.

[tatersalad]

Apr 1, 2015 14:04:56 GMT -5 dmoney said:

I hate when I go to a restaurant and I see every kid at the table with a different electronic device to keep them quiet... Seriously?? What happened to crayons and coloring books? I remember playing hang man or tick tack toe with my parents when we were out to eat. When did it become socially acceptable for technology to "keep our children behaved" No, you should teach them. Yes there are times where you cant help it and if a kid has a melt down its going to happen.

Good luck staying technology free with your kiddo.

[dmoney]

Apr 1, 2015 20:52:53 GMT -5 tatersalad said:

Apr 1, 2015 14:04:56 GMT -5 dmoney said:

I hate when I go to a restaurant and I see every kid at the table with a different electronic device to keep them quiet... Seriously?? What happened to crayons and coloring books? I remember playing hang man or tick tack toe with my parents when we were out to eat. When did it become socially acceptable for technology to "keep our children behaved" No, you should teach them. Yes there are times where you cant help it and if a kid has a melt down its going to happen.

Good luck staying technology free with your kiddo.

Im not saying that Im going to be technology free but when you are out to eat as a family, why not interact with your children instead of putting a tablet in front of them to keep them quiet?? I have plenty of friends who have young children and are able to have nice meals without technology. 

[Widget123]

Apr 2, 2015 8:53:32 GMT -5 @jemomma said:

Apr 2, 2015 7:42:17 GMT -5 dmoney said:

Im not saying that Im going to be technology free but when you are out to eat as a family, why not interact with your children instead of putting a tablet in front of them to keep them quiet?? I have plenty of friends who have young children and are able to have nice meals without technology. 

The only interaction you are going to have with a 2 year old at a restaurant is going to be something like:
"No, honey, put down the fork"
"Okay, let's not eat the crayons"
"Please don't spill mommy's water all over the table"
"It's okay, the food will be ready soon, please hold it together for 5 mire minutes"

Kid's can't always be patient and obedient and sometimes it's okay to distract them with a picture on your phone or let them play a game for 5 minutes.  I would much rather do that than let them scream bloody murder and disturb the people dining around us.

DD has recently picked up her cousins' habit of wanting to run around the restaurant.  She also likes to climb on top of the table and grab sugar packets, salt/pepper shakers, napkins, etc. The more that I think about it, starting to bring our ipad along when we go out to eat sounds like a good idea.

[wegrowsheep]

Apr 1, 2015 12:10:37 GMT -5 veggiemo said:

Apr 1, 2015 11:57:22 GMT -5 @jemomma said:

Isn't your DS still pretty young? I expect that behavior from little guys since they really don't know any better yet. My DD does the same thing, she's 2. She refuses to sit in the cart and throws a screaming fit if I make her. She also likes to run around the store, although we are working on that - I let her ride on the edge of the cart, which she seems to like, or help me put the groceries in the cart. My DS did the same when he was around 2 and he is soooo much better now (he's 3).  

Now, if your kid was 10 years old doing that, I would totally side eye you.

Yeah, he's 2.5. It just seems like there are always these kids around his age sitting nicely in the cart. I've been bringing fruit snacks and that occupies him for 5 minutes, then he wants out again. He's great at helping to put things in the cart (although lately he's been throwing, almost hit a bystander with a jar of mayo) and of course he LOVES putting the stuff on the belt for checkout. But I can only distract him with those things briefly and then he's off and running. I kept thinking this would get easier as the years went on, but it's not. We go grocery shopping every weekend and I just don't understand why he can't figure out how to behave when we do it so often. Some trips are better than others, but overall the experience is not good.

You are in the thick of it. Just keep smiling, and be firm. That was a tough shopping stage for us too, more so with DS than DD. This too shall pass!

[dmoney]

Apr 2, 2015 9:45:03 GMT -5 Widget123 said:

Apr 2, 2015 8:53:32 GMT -5 @jemomma said:

The only interaction you are going to have with a 2 year old at a restaurant is going to be something like:
"No, honey, put down the fork"
"Okay, let's not eat the crayons"
"Please don't spill mommy's water all over the table"
"It's okay, the food will be ready soon, please hold it together for 5 mire minutes"

Kid's can't always be patient and obedient and sometimes it's okay to distract them with a picture on your phone or let them play a game for 5 minutes.  I would much rather do that than let them scream bloody murder and disturb the people dining around us.

DD has recently picked up her cousins' habit of wanting to run around the restaurant.  She also likes to climb on top of the table and grab sugar packets, salt/pepper shakers, napkins, etc. The more that I think about it, starting to bring our ipad along when we go out to eat sounds like a good idea.

But even while eating?? Ive seen it where everyone has their food and the kids are hardly eating because they are playing games... 5 minutes sure thats fine but if you are out to dinner and the kid has the tablet from the second you get into the restaurant until the second you walk out? That im not okay with.  Again I am a FTM so i might be eating crow in 2 years but I just feel like there are other ways to get your kid to behave in a restaurant. 

[Ana0927]

Apr 1, 2015 14:11:14 GMT -5 alayne926 said:

Apr 1, 2015 9:59:20 GMT -5 @jemomma said:

There are some things that other parents do that I just cannot handle.

DH and I took the kids out to lunch a couple days ago and I saw something that just drives me bonkers! A mom and dad were dining with their three kids, all under age 10. Both mom and dad had gigantic alcoholic drinks...at lunchtime...with their kids present...and no designated driver. I cannot stand it when I see this, and I see it quite often. Why endanger your children and other innocent lives to have a cocktail with your lunch??? One of you can't abstain? I just don't get it.

Anyone else have anything that other parents do that drive you crazy?

Maybe this is flameable, but if they are having ONE drink while they are eating, I don't see the problem in this.  DH and I normally alternate who's drinking with a meal (obviously, it's not been me for a while) but when we're on vacation we both may have one drink during a meal when DS is with us.

Of course, if they are both getting hammered during their meal with their child(ren) with them, there's a problem and not OK. 

Eh we do this and we know our tolerance so its not a big deal to us.  Usually when we are doing this we are out somewhere for the day walking around downtown or something.  

My pet peeve is parents who have no problem letting their kids run around a restaurant. To me that is dangerous.  They could hurt themselves, knock down another costumer or waiter carrying food.

[wegrowsheep]

Apr 2, 2015 10:11:54 GMT -5 dmoney said:

Apr 2, 2015 9:45:03 GMT -5 Widget123 said:

DD has recently picked up her cousins' habit of wanting to run around the restaurant.  She also likes to climb on top of the table and grab sugar packets, salt/pepper shakers, napkins, etc. The more that I think about it, starting to bring our ipad along when we go out to eat sounds like a good idea.

But even while eating?? Ive seen it where everyone has their food and the kids are hardly eating because they are playing games... 5 minutes sure thats fine but if you are out to dinner and the kid has the tablet from the second you get into the restaurant until the second you walk out? That im not okay with.  Again I am a FTM so i might be eating crow in 2 years but I just feel like there are other ways to get your kid to behave in a restaurant. 

I would tend to agree. Ours are currently almost 4 and 6, and while we rarely eat out (with or without the kids), we spend our time waiting educating for good manners. They are far from having perfect manners, but they never get technology. When they were smaller, sometimes that meant one of us would order for everyone, and the other took the kids for a quick walk.

[Widget123]

Apr 2, 2015 10:11:54 GMT -5 dmoney said:

Apr 2, 2015 9:45:03 GMT -5 Widget123 said:

DD has recently picked up her cousins' habit of wanting to run around the restaurant.  She also likes to climb on top of the table and grab sugar packets, salt/pepper shakers, napkins, etc. The more that I think about it, starting to bring our ipad along when we go out to eat sounds like a good idea.

But even while eating?? Ive seen it where everyone has their food and the kids are hardly eating because they are playing games... 5 minutes sure thats fine but if you are out to dinner and the kid has the tablet from the second you get into the restaurant until the second you walk out? That im not okay with.  Again I am a FTM so i might be eating crow in 2 years but I just feel like there are other ways to get your kid to behave in a restaurant. 

She isn't very good at eating out at public either (i.e. it is hard to even get her to eat sometimes), especially when other people besides DH and I are around, except for breakfast because she is a little less stir crazy in the mornings.  Then, because she is acting so crazy, I don't get a chance to eat until someone else is done eating.  I'm hoping she will settle down a bit when her baby brother arrives.