~ ~ ~ ~ WEEKLY CHECK IN 4/7/15 ~ ~ ~ ~

[icequeen]

Good morning, y'all! I hope everyone is having a good week so far. This is our weekly check in, so let us know how the last week has gone for you and update us on anything significant you would like to share. Thanks for all your support for me and for each other. Please PM if you would like to be tagged for participation.

flcl, mrsb1008, yoshijo28, @rocknrollfriend, @wallflwr926, @ordinaryamy, runnergirl812, helloamanda, @giamia923, snarkysparklefart, @alleykat05, bluerainfire, sko14, @erin2021, spencer1337

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Please state your diagnosis and/or status:

How is your week going?

Any struggles or accomplishments you would like to share?

Any changes in medication or recent appointments?

GTKY: What career did you want to have as a child?

[Deleted]

Please state your diagnosis and/or status: GAD, some depression

How is your week going? Started bumpy, but it's getting better.

Any struggles or accomplishments you would like to share? The week was pretty bad starting on Sunday, but I am kicking my ass to work out and feel better about myself. So I feel better that I have a plan set in place, I just hope I can stick with it!

Any changes in medication or recent appointments? I'm just trying to take more vitamins, eat healthier, more vitamin C&D.

GTKY: What career did you want to have as a child? I was adamant I would play for the Detroit Tigers. A little far fetched, but I did get to play in Comerica Park Stadium when I was 13. So at least I was able to play on their diamond!

Edit: forgot the top question.

[runnergirl812]

Please state your diagnosis and/or status: GAD

How is your week going? It's going okay. Easter was great. Yesterday and today I took off because I dread going to my job and I just needed a break. Our company doesn't give Good Friday as a holiday, so yesterday it was nice to just sleep. Today I'm getting this gahtdayum review finished. It's sucking the life out of me.

Any struggles or accomplishments you would like to share? I'm struggling with my job, which you all know about. However, I have applied to 4 jobs in the last couple weeks. I'm hoping at least 1 gets a call back. I also paid off 2 credit cards today. That was a big load off me. I still have a lot of debt to clear, and BF has even more, but it's a start to financial freedom.

Any changes in medication or recent appointments? No changes in meds. Next appt is the 16th.

GTKY: What career did you want to have as a child? an ER doctor

[booksntea]

Hi all, this week has been a bit up and down. I have some anger/anxiety issues.

Spring is finally here in my home state, Maryland. I am happy for winter to be over, but I have noticed over the years, that spring can be a difficult time for me emotionally. The Chinese say that spring is a time for clearing anger that is stagnant in the liver. Maybe that is right for me, because I have had some bad emotional outbursts this week with DH.

I am trying meditation twice a day, journaling and yoga which I think tempers it a bit.

My LO will be two in June and is starting with his terrible twos. Unfortunately, I have noticed parallels with my behavior and his. I guess at least I am happy that I am able to notice when I am acting like a toddler and it gives me a lot more sympathy for LO's emotions since I have trouble controlling my own. I do make a concerted effort to at least act like an adult with him.

[booksntea]

Hi all, this week has been a bit up and down. I have some anger/anxiety issues.

Spring is finally here in my home state, Maryland. I am happy for winter to be over, but I have noticed over the years, that spring can be a difficult time for me emotionally. The Chinese say that spring is a time for clearing anger that is stagnant in the liver. Maybe that is right for me, because I have had some bad emotional outbursts this week with DH.

I am trying meditation twice a day, journaling and yoga which I think tempers it a bit.

My LO will be two in June and is starting with his terrible twos. Unfortunately, I have noticed parallels with my behavior and his. I guess at least I am happy that I am able to notice when I am acting like a toddler and it gives me a lot more sympathy for LO's emotions since I have trouble controlling my own. I do make a concerted effort to at least act like an adult with him.

[RedDDD]

Please state your diagnosis and/or status: Depression with Anxiety

How is your week going? I can feel the anxiety in the chest. Its been rough and I think Im anticipating the weeks to come which will be challenging weeks

Any struggles or accomplishments you would like to share? Struggling with starting medication for the first time. A little scared, but hoping for the best. I struggle with losing my cool with my kids which is totally unacceptable. Struggling with concentration at work....struggling with my marriage. Its been a tough road lately

Any changes in medication or recent appointments? Starting 10mg Prozac tomorrow morning then bumping to 20 next week, apt was this morning and I pretty much had to hold back sobs. ugh

GTKY: What career did you want to have as a child? An Archaeologist

[Deleted]

Please state your diagnosis and/or status: Bipolar 1, GAD, ADD, and Narcolepsy.

How is your week going? So-so. Grumpy from impending period.

Any struggles or accomplishments you would like to share? H and I have been communicating more about his inability to be flexible.

Any changes in medication or recent appointments? Psych on thursday.

GTKY: What career did you want to have as a child? Pediatrician.

[Deleted]

Apparently, skipping a week is becoming a bad habit :S I wrote my post last week but put off posting until I had an answer to the GTKY. Naturally, I completely forgot with work and Easter.

Please state your diagnosis and/or status:
Unofficially depression, anxiety. Also having issues with paranoia and staying in touch with reality.

How is your week going?
I appear to have caught something over the weekend so I've just been lying in bed listening to an audiobook the past two days.
FI came up for Easter weekend, which was fun.
On Sunday after service I had to say goodbye to everyone since I'm moving this weekend, which was a little sad and weird because I suck at goodbyes.
Breaking news: I just got an interview in response to that really intense application I wrote last month! Happy dance ensued (behind closed door because I'm at work lol).

Any struggles or accomplishments you would like to share?
While trying to focus on being healthier, I've realized that how I look at myself is more about my paranoia of being judged than actually being healthy. I had a breakdown two years ago over a picture of me at my very thin cousin's wedding that didn't seem very flattering. I have this fear that I'll feel the same way about my wedding photos (T minus 25 days!). I keep telling myself that not once have I looked at myself in my wedding dress and felt it looked bad. But it's fitted, so the fear remains, I suppose.

GTKY: What career did you want to have as a child?
Easy questions, yayy! From the time I could hold a pencil I wanted to be a writer. I made a family newspaper as well as writing and illustrating picture books. Unfortunately, I'm my own worst enemy and destroyed my work since it wasn't "perfect."

ETA: Formatting, because I can.
ETA #2: Awesomeness happened.

[flcl]

@erin2021, glad that you're taking things into your own hands and starting to feel better. How cool that you got to play in Comerica Park Stadium!

runnergirl812, FX that you get calls regarding the jobs you've applied for!! Congrats on getting the 2 cards paid off... it's a great start!

@alleykat05, hope you feel better as the week goes on

booksntea, spring is typically really hard for me too especially April. I'm sorry that things are rough. It's great that you can make a connection between what you're going through with how LO is feeling. Hang in there!

RedDDD, best of luck with starting the meds. I hope they provide some relief for you.

@wallflwr926, nice communication with H... any break throughs?

@ordinaryamy, congrats on the interview and hope the move went smoothly! Sounds like you have a lot of great things heading your way... hope you enjoy your big day!



Please state your diagnosis and/or status: depression, anxiety, panic attacks

How is your week going? Not great, but at least better than last week. April typically sucks for me so this crap feeling is nothing new

Any struggles or accomplishments you would like to share? I made it through Easter with my ILs which is a HUGE feat.

Any changes in medication or recent appointments? Nah... I've been so avoidant with this part of my life. Bad, I know but I just can't right now.

GTKY: What career did you want to have as a child? a vet, I love animals!

[yoshijo28]

@erin2021 it's great you have a plan in place that will help you feel better about yourself. Working out has always helped me with that too
runnergirl812 congrats about paying off your credit cards! That is a wonderful accomplishment and you must feel so relieved not to have to worry about that.
@alleykat05 ((hugs)) Is there anything you can do for you that would help you feel less stressed?
RedDDD I hope you see some improvement from the medication soon!
@wallflwr926 good to hear you're communicating better with YH. Does he seem receptive to what you are saying?
@amy so exciting only 25 days! I know you'll love the way you look on your wedding day. Your pictures will look great!
booksntea sorry you're struggling with anger outbursts this week. It sounds like you are really trying hard to control it. I hope the meditation, yoga, and journaling help you!

Diagnosis: anorexia, OCD, anxiety

How is your week going? Rough week with eating out a lot and the holiday

struggles/accomplishments: my friend made a comment indicating my arms aren't thin. I didn't take that very well. I've been increasing my work outs and sometimes weighing twice a day. I really have it In my head I need to lose 1 lb and then 4 more to be where I want to be. had a good therapy session today. We talked about my OCD more than my ED so my therapist can see how the 2 are tied together.

GTKY: I wanted to be a teacher

[Deleted]

Please state your diagnosis and/or status: depression, anxiety

How is your week going? mentally, pretty good!

Any struggles or accomplishments you would like to share? I've made it through a whole week feeling pretty good, I think that's quite an accomplishment!

Any changes in medication or recent appointments? Nope.

GTKY: What career did you want to have as a child? From about the 3rd grade I wanted to "save the Earth." I asked my mom what type of job that is and she said an environmentalist, so that's what I wanted to be. And I pretty much am today.

[Deleted]

@erin2021, good for you for getting a workout plan in place - you can totally do it!
booksntea, oh my goodness, I have totally felt the way you do - like a toddler. I do think it helps to show our LOs some compassion, so that's a silver lining!
RedDDD, GL with the meds, I hope it helps you!!
@ordinaryamy, congrats on the interview, I hope it goes well!

[juliayadda]

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Please state your diagnosis and/or status:
Depression, GAD, PMDD

How is your week going?
I have been derailed by my cold. Both physically and mentally. I am gaining weight and feeling fat. I have had a hard time interacting with people. Negative scripts are popping back in.


Any struggles or accomplishments you would like to share?
I get PMDD as in PMS that starts early and is more severe. My medication helps but lately I have been getting worse. I think it's starting as we speak.

Any changes in medication or recent appointments?
I skipped Monday and Tuesday because I ran out. I took them this morning hopefully I will calm myself today.

GTKY: What career did you want to have as a child?

Model, singer, Olympic athlete, and Actor. I had so many acceptance speeches and talk show visits planned out in my head.

[booksntea]

@erin2021 - totally agree on the vitamins c/d - great mood lifters
runnergirl812 - congrats on paying off two cards!!
RedDDD - sorry things are feeling overwhelming now, but kudos to you for taking steps to heal and recover.
@rocknrollfriend - yey to you for having a great week!
juliayadda - I am with you on the PMS - mine is a beast.

GTKY: What career did you want to have as a child? I left this off my original post. When I was kind I loved to push buttons, and I remember thinking I would like to be a cashier so I could push buttons. ( I have always been very tactile.) I also liked to write.
I do a lot of typing and writing in my present day job,so I get to press buttons and write.

[flcl]

yoshijo28, I'm sorry your friend made that comment... why in the world would she say something like that to you? Please try to keep in mind that that comment may be more about her issues vs you. It sounds like you're taking good time out of your therapy sessions to help your therapist understand your struggles.

earlybird, welcome FX at your cardiologist appointment today. Hope you get good answers!

juliayadda, Hang in there... I hope you start feeling better soon and that your meds help. I hate those negative scripts... I have a hard time keeping them away too.

[flcl]

@rocknrollfriend, so happy to hear that you're having a good week!

[bluerainfire]

Please state your diagnosis and/or status:
pstd, anxiety, depression

How is your week going?
ok, some ups and downs..

Any struggles or accomplishments you would like to share?
general anxiety about the car accident I was in- not my fault, but my lawyer is terrible at communicating, and i frankly just dont want to deal with it. DD didnt want to take a nap today, so I didnt get to take a nap, and I need a nap because I work late tonight- generally grumpy when I am working on 5 hours of sleep..


Any changes in medication or recent appointments?
Nope

GTKY: What career did you want to have as a child?

I wanted to be a farmer, and a fashion designer, also a witch..

[spencer1337]

Please state your diagnosis and/or status:ADD, anxiety

How is your week going?It was going good.Then we found out one of my best friends brother committed suicide. It was a big shock. I wasnt close with him, but i still feel very sad about the whole thing, like a dark cloud has been following me around. The funeral is today, but its 4 hours away so i couldnt go. To top it off i have been slacking on the small daily goals. I need to start that back up.

Any struggles or accomplishments you would like to share?I had a family gathering at my house for my youngests b day and i didnt freak out over if the house was clean enough, ect. I actually had fun and relaxed a bit.

Any changes in medication or recent appointments? I have my next therapist app next week.

GTKY: What career did you want to have as a child? In typical me fashion i changed it about every week. Vet, teacher, doctor. The only thing i knew i wanted was to help people.

[icequeen]

Please state your diagnosis and/or status: Anorexia Nervosa, Bulimia Nervosa, GAD

How is your week going? It's going ok. I'm feeling a little down because I was hoping to start my oral meds for my IUI cycle today but have to wait until tomorrow. I know it's just one day but I'm starting to panic because right away something is going wrong and I'm worried this will be another wasted cycle. I can't afford to throw more money down the toilet for an IUI and BFN this time because we will have to skip next cycle to save up. I've been feeling pretty positive up until this point and I'm really excited and optimistic and have a good gut feeling about doing the IUI. DH and I have been communicating really well and had a long talk last week about a few things that were causing friction between us and I'm so glad we're both on the same page now.

Any struggles or accomplishments you would like to share? I've been struggling with breakfast again. I think it's a side effect from my nightime medication. I think it's still in my system when I wake up, causing me to feel full and I don't want to eat. My psych said I can skip that dose, so I might do that. I've been doing a ton of "body checking" in the mirrors and other reflections since I haven't been weighing myself because I'm paranoid that I'm gaining weight. I feel out of control sometimes. I'm proud of myself for curbing my compulsion to exercise more to compensate for not being able to run one day last week, and I tried a new food for dinner last week that is out of my normal routine. Overall I am pretty happy and content, so I think I'm in a good place.

Any changes in medication or recent appointments? Not this week because my nanny is out of town.

GTKY: What career did you want to have as a child? I wanted to be an equestrian or veterinarian.

I'll be back to check in on everyone later!

[flcl]

bluerainfire, sorry you're still dealing with the accident and that your lawyer sucks at communicating. I find a lot of them are kinda crappy with that. Here's hoping that you'll be done with that soon!

spencer1337, I am so so sorry about your friend's brother. That is so sad. I hope you're able to stay grounded and get back to your small daily goals.

icequeen, FX that this is your cycle. TTC is so stressful and you've been working so hard to stay positive in so many aspects of your life. Yay icequeen!

[runnergirl812]

Apr 7, 2015 14:41:15 GMT -5 RedDDD said:

Please state your diagnosis and/or status: Depression with Anxiety

How is your week going? I can feel the anxiety in the chest. Its been rough and I think Im anticipating the weeks to come which will be challenging weeks

Any struggles or accomplishments you would like to share? Struggling with starting medication for the first time. A little scared, but hoping for the best. I struggle with losing my cool with my kids which is totally unacceptable. Struggling with concentration at work....struggling with my marriage. Its been a tough road lately

Any changes in medication or recent appointments? Starting 10mg Prozac tomorrow morning then bumping to 20 next week, apt was this morning and I pretty much had to hold back sobs. ugh

GTKY: What career did you want to have as a child? An Archaeologist

I'm on 20 mg of Prozac for anxiety. It's working. Give it up to 4-5 weeks to get into your system. Don't feel bad about crying. I think I sob almost everytime I'm at therapy. :-)

[icequeen]

@erin2021, you sound like you have some renewed motivation and I'm really happy to see that. Maybe you can get a mini calendar to help organize your daily workouts and write down some meal plans to help you stick to a schedule.
runnergirl812, great job with all the job apps! That's great! Paying off the CC's is a huge deal, too. I'm happy you are taking control of these things instead of letting your anxiety control you.
@alleykat05, I'm sorry you are having such a hard time. Have you decided if you are going to get a psych for postpartum? I think that is really important for you, because he or she can guide you to a support group or therapist that can help you manage your anxiety and depression with the new baby and possibly prescribe meds if need be. It might be worth talking to your OB about now.
booksntea, I'm glad your routine is working for you! It's also good that you are becoming more self-aware with your behavior so you can recognize the patterns and be more proactive in changing them.
RedDDD, I'm so sorry it's been so hard on you lately. Just remember that this too shall pass and if you really feel like this is the bottom of the barrel then the only way is up, right? Things will only get better from here, hopefully, for you. FX that the new meds are tolerable and helpful.
@wallflwr926, did you get any bad spotting or IBS symptoms with your PMS this time? I'm just hoping you aren't in pain like last time.
@ordinaryamy, huge congrats on acing your interview! And I really doubt anyone is going to care more about how you look in the wedding dress than the meaning of the ceremony and having fun with friends and family. Just keep your eyes on your man and if you have to, just tell him not to let you see the professional photos until the two of you are alone together and in a happy place.
flcl, great job managing the holiday with your IL's and having a better week! Can you pinpoint anything that may have contributed to this change?
yoshijo28, I'm glad therapy was productive this week. I know you want to lose 5 more pounds, but, what happens once you get there? Are you going to stop your behaviors? Are you going to change anything else or redefine you goal weight? I know the holidays are a stressful time food wise so hopefully now you can settle back into a more normal routine.
earlybird, welcome! How were your appointments?
@rocknrollfriend, yay!! I'm so happy for you. This is what I like to hear
juliayadda, I was just thinking I haven't seen you as much lately At least now you have your meds so hopefully you'll start feeling more like yourself again. Maybe you can at least take a quick walk on your sweet treadmill and listen to some music? If I don't want to workout I usually download a bunch of new songs so I look forward to listening to them when I run. Hang in there, girl. (((HUGS)))
bluerainfire, I really hope you get some rest soon. I know how it feels to be sleep deprived.
spencer1337, I'm so sorry for the loss of your friend and BFF's brother. That is really terrible and I don't blame you at all for being a little derailed this week. I'm very impressed that you were able to relax during the party and not worry about the cleanliness of the house. Great job! I hope you can get back to doing your small daily goals because I know they were working for you.

[icequeen]

@sluttybigb00bz, I'm glad DH is recovering well. I hope you can get an appointment with RE's therapist soon if you can afford it financially and time wise. It really sounds like such a great resource. When do you get off the bench again?

[icequeen]

Apr 9, 2015 16:28:34 GMT -5 @sluttybigb00bz said:

Apr 9, 2015 16:25:58 GMT -5 icequeen said:

@sluttybigb00bz, I'm glad DH is recovering well. I hope you can get an appointment with RE's therapist soon if you can afford it financially and time wise. It really sounds like such a great resource. When do you get off the bench again?

Oh we were cleared for sex after a week (yesterday). We just missed this FW because of the surgery.

We will be back at it next cycle, but it's too soon to see results. I have A LOT of questions for my new RE so we shall see what the plan is.

That's great. Keeping everything crossed for you.

[helloamanda]

Please state your diagnosis and/or status: Depression and Anxiety

How is your week going? Meh. I started a new diet on Sunday and it was absolutely terrible. The shakes they gave me made me gag and it was no meat, and I honestly don't remember ever going a day without meat. I was so irritable and mean, and it wasn't fair to anyone around me, so I gave in. Then I felt bad that I gave up and ate a bunch of food to deal with my feelings. But then I got the flu and I've lost 13lbs because I'm not keeping anything down They gave me a shot in my butt to help with the nausea so I could make it to Walgreens to get the anti-nausea pills so I could eat/drink enough to take my medicines. He was worried my blood sugar was low, but I have been drinking Gatorade which is keeping it up. We also had terrible storms all day and DH is out of town for work, and I am absolutely terrified of storms, especially when they start throwing around the "tornado" word. I also have a cleaning service coming tomorrow for the first time because my aunt was going to come up to go to a White Sox game with me for her birthday (but now I'm sick and can't go). So my anxiety has been high all day. I'll probably take an Ativan so I can sleep a little tonight.

Any struggles or accomplishments you would like to share? Struggling with emotional eating again. And anxiety.

Any changes in medication or recent appointments? Had to cancel my therapy appointment today due to being sick, but I could have really used it.

GTKY: What career did you want to have as a child? A meteorologist lol I had all kinds of books about weather, which were my favorite. Funny since I'm so scared of bad weather! Imagine me on TV during a tornado warning: OMG GET IN THE BASEMENT OR DIE lol

[KayVeeKay]

@erin2021 it's good to have a plan. Do you have something to help keep you motivated? Like another person or "if I do so many miles/squats/etc. this week, I will do ________"? I've always found this helps keep me on track.

RedDDD I'm in the same place you are about starting meds. I hope I find one that works so I can stop feeling guilty. I would imagine the fact that it makes you feel better would help with the guilt of taking it. Just take all of it (meds, temper, everything) a day at a time.

yoshijo28 While I can't even begin to know what it's like to have an ED, I do know what it's like to take things the wrong way when they hit close to home. Does this friend know you're situation? If so, they should know better. If not, that's what makes it tough. I personally would tell that friend (nicely) what's going on, but I understand the hang ups you may have. No matter, try not to worry about the little comments. Hugs.

[KayVeeKay]

helloamanda Hey, I don't blame you for being afraid. The "T" word is scary as hell

[KayVeeKay]

Diagnosis: PPD seeking treatment

How is my week? In one word, shitty. The Cymbalta pretty much put me into a drunken stupid, so my doctor took me off of it. I called back today and we will be starting 10mg Prozac. I also got some blood results back and have continued high CRP and ANA titer, which points to something systemic. Likely, it's autoimmune with the symptoms I've had since LO was born. My boss is being an asshole, which makes me lose all respect for her because she touts taking care of your people and then turns around and screws them over.

Struggles/accomplishments: I've been a crying mess all week. Coming off the Cymbalta seems to have made it even worse than before. I can't stop blaming myself about everything that has every gone wrong in my life all of a sudden. DH was talking about the atmosphere of a new job he's thinking of getting and how much he thinks he will like it if he gets hired on, and I just started bawling. I keep wishing I had such an opportunity to do something I love and that it's all my fault that I won't. I feel like I'm drowning and I want to wake up from this nightmare. I'm sorry to write such a novel. I appreciate the support I've gotten here so much, and I really hope one day I can reciprocate better.

Meds/appts: I came off Cymbalta 20mg on Wednesday for side effects. I will be starting Prozac as soon as I fill the prescription.

GTKY: Actress.

[Deleted]

KayVeeKay I'm so sorry you're having such a terrible week. Be gentle with yourself - coming off a med is no joke. Hang in there as best you can and try to think of this as a temporary state. In all likelihood you should be feeling better soon. Big hugs.

[booksntea]

KayVeeKay - ugh, I am sorry you are not in a good place right now. I have definitely been there, hopefully the new medication will help to lift your mood. I don't have great words of wisdom, but try to remember you won't feel like this forever and you will feel better.