Online birth parent panel?

[nobb14]

This may be a weird one, but I'm new to the DIA process and curious for etiquette about a future match- how do birth parents prefer potential adoptive parents to handle the first conversation/introductions? I guess to be more specific - The "you've been matched" call, followed by the scheduled call with the birth mother.

Is it hurtful for us to acknowledge what you're going through? How personal do these phone calls get? I am so nervous about saying the wrong thing - I guess because after experiencing loss I know that even people with the best intentions can be hurtful when they make sweeping statements. I'm also terrified of coming on too strong...

[chicago]

With Mother's Day coming up I've been wondering about your thoughts on Birth Mother's Day (the Saturday before Mother's Day I believe). At first I loved the idea of specifically recognizing Birth Mother's on their own day ... but then I wondered if separating you from Mother's Day hurt? I know every Birth Mother is different and may have her own preference ... but what is your (and/or carolinah) thought on this?

[carolinah]

I didn't celebrate birth Mother's Day last year and I don't plan to celebrate it this year. I guess it felt like another day to emphasize how much I'm not a "real "mom and I just didn't need that. I would certainly not be offended if someone else recognized me on it because I know they mean well and as bookworm can attest, just getting someone to acknowledge you and your birth child is a wonderful thing. On Mother's Day I just silently recognized myself for what I had done and what I have been through. A few amazing people send me messages on Mother's Day wishing me a happy Mother's Day and it absolutely made my day.

[chicago]

I think both of you are confirming that I should remember to recognize/remember and reach out to the Birth Mother on Mother's Day ... And that's more important than the Saturday before it. As always thanks!

[theatrepal]

How do you communicate with K and get photos? Do you like your system? If not, do you have a suggestion of a different way?

[theatrepal]

Thanks bookworm! Sounds like I better figure out this Skype thing before we match.

[pinkie]

theatrepal - we FaceTime with dS2's birth mom. But she has an iPhone so that makes it possible to do so

@bookworm92 I had a question for you I thought of driving into work but I forgot it now...hopefully it will come back to me