Stories of our angels

[dadalou]

I thought it might be nice to all be able to share our angels and their stories. I know a lot of us already know each other from the bump, but didn't necessarily write out their whole story here once we moved.

So tell us about your angel.

[dadalou]

My story. Copied from my blog.

***warning - living child mentioned***

After a routine appointment I was sent to labor and delivery on Thursday, February 6. I was going to be induced. They broke my water, which was really painful, and then the baby's heartbeat went down. They had me try all kinds of positions and it finally came back up. They had me sign consent forms for an emergency c section in case that might be needed. They were going to start my induction and get me an epidural ASAP. When they started the pitocin baby's heartbeat dropped slowly and then was gone. After changing positions a couple of times it was decided that I needed to deliver right away so I was rushed to the OR. Dave was told that he had to stay behind because I was going to be put under.

I was rushed down the hall to the OR and prepped for surgery within about 2 minutes. At 3:07, about 7 minutes after I was brought in, Nathaniel Willis was born. He weighed 8 lbs 2 oz and was 20 1/2 inches long. I have been told that he was very pale and not breathing and had no heart beat. They tried to revive him for about 45 minutes, but we're not successful. I was told all this when I woke up in recovery about an hour later. Dave was next to me. Neither of us had seen Nathaniel yet. After I was told what had happened they asked if I wanted to see him, then brought him and laid him on my chest. He was beautiful and perfect and just looked like he was asleep.

We got to spend as much time with him at the hospital as we wanted to. We were there with him for three days. I even kept him in my room overnight one night when Dave went home to stay with Abigail.

Though he never lived outside my body he is having a big impact on so many people. While we were in the hospital Dave and I had so many conversations with doctors and nurses about our faith and how were able to be so strong in our unexpected and terrible circumstances. We keep looking back and seeing the hand of God at work in little strange things that happened along the way in the pregnancy.

I think we overwhelmed the people at the funeral home with how many people came to the memorial service for Nathaniel. They ended up setting up an overflow area outside of the chapel. We warned them there could be hundreds of people coming. I know there were some we never saw and didn't have a chance to talk to.

Nathaniel Willis Cooksey never took a breath, but I believe that he will leave a huge legacy and I am excited to know what that will look like.

[happyin14]

My story is a bit different than I think most will be here. And warning... There's a bit more detail here than I usually share.

Jack was born in November of 2010 and was perfect. He was a beautiful, smart and sweet child. Very kind and generous. And really really smart.

One weekend we were visiting my in-laws. We were actually in town for the annual family reunion. Jack was 2.5 and stayed with my in-laws while Mh and I went out for a date night. We stayed at a nearby hotel because my in-laws didn't have enough beds.

At around 11:15 that night, MH's phone rang and it was his sister saying that the house was on fire and Jack was still inside. We ran to our car and drove the 10 minutes to the house. This drive felt like an hour long and we kept trying to call and get an update. When we arrived, they still hadn't found Jack or my MIL. We then learned that my MIL found the fire, got FIL and SIL up and told them to get out. Then ran upstairs for Jack. Neither of them made it out.

She lost her life trying to save my kid. We also lost our dog which is a small piece but an important piece.

It's been awful. But getting better. And like others, we are focused on the legacy. A year after the fire (this past fall) we decided to start a foundation in his honor. We held our first event on March 1st and it was amazing. We think we will have enough raised to cover one year of preschool for a needy child. That was our goal. To give a child the right start at life in a good preschool.

******rainbow mentioned******



After that, I had one CP and one miscarriage at 11 weeks. Then, this past October, Cooper was born! He's perfect. Looks a bit like his brother which is both great and awful. It's been really hard to have C and not be able to share this with Jack or my in-laws (my FIL died two months after the fire- I say from heartbreak). But I am so, so grateful he's here.

[littleowl913]

Sorry this is so long:

After our MMC in February 2014, I got pregnant on our first try. I had bleeding at 10 weeks and 13 weeks but OB chalked it up to SCH and everything looked fine. first round of blood tests came back that I was a higher risk for developing pre-eclampsia and low birth weight. Nothing to worry about now, I just need extra monitoring. 16 week blood test came back, some tests came back abnormal. My OB told me don't worry a lot of these test come back abnormal but everything turns out just fine. I had to go get an A/S ultrasound at the hospital and genetic testing. At the ultrasound he had no chromosomal abnormality indicators, which she said is a really good sign and we found out he was definitely a boy! We spoke with the genetics counselor and opted to do the Verify blood test. Verify came back normal! but one of the other blood tests I retook came back even higher so they scheduled another A/S at 20 weeks. At the A/S ultrasound the doctor said everything looked fine but now they have to monitor his growth. We were so happy! We had a lot of scares but in the end, we always got good news.

Fast forward two weeks. I woke up at 5 am because I felt some wetness come out of me. I went to the bathroom and I saw blood on my pants. Then I felt gushes of blood and clots. I was shaking and terrified. DH already left for work. I could barely get the bleeding to slow down in order to run and get underwear and a pad. I immediately called my parents to drive me to the ER. I called my OB to tell them I was going to the ER and let me know which OB was on call at that time. I called DH and he seemed relatively calm (so unlike DH) he assured me that it was nothing to worry about and he'll try to meet me at the hospital as soon as he can. They sent me to L&D and my OB and DH met me there. They said my BP was high (and I thought well duh I'm scared shitless right now) but the portable ultrasound showed a happy baby. But due to the amount of blood and my BP, she had to admit me for observations.

I was moved to a private room in L&D and DH and I figured we would have to wait it out for a while. We saw our LO so we weren't worried at all. Then another OB from my group came in and asked us if anyone has updated us. I said well they just needed to observe me. He had this oh shit look on his face. He pulled up a chair and gave us the worst news we could have imagined: You've been diagnosed with pre-eclampsia. The only way to "cure" pre-eclampsia is to delivery your baby. At 22 weeks, he's not viable. Maybe if you were a couple of weeks further along, there could be something we could do. After consulting with the MFM in our practice and the head of the MFM department of the hospital, the only option you have is the deliver you son or opt for an D&E.

To say that DH and I were stunned and devastated is an understatement. At first DH and I couldn't imagine seeing his face. After I thought about it, I decided I was going to deliver our son. I made the decision on my own so I told DH I understand if he couldn't be there. I wanted to hold him and see his face. Around noon I gave them the go ahead to start the induction process. I updated my parents and asked my mom to be there with me when I delivered him. I was exhausted from lack of food and the magnesium made me loopy. Around 3:45 a.m. I started to feel pain. DH asked if he could stay. This was his son and he should be there. I was so glad he changed his mind. I think he would have regretted not being there. They gave me morphine and later an epidural. At 6:15 a.m. our beautiful boy Ronin came into this world. DH peeked over to look at him and his first response was "oh my god he's so cute." Then he started sobbing. I couldn't see him because of the angle they had me in. They took him to clean him off. When they brought him back, we held him and like any other parent we took possession of his features. He has my nose and DH's chin and feet. When we were with him, there was no sadness. He was so tiny (14oz) and looked so peaceful. The hospital gave us pictures and I look at every so often when I really miss him.

[mommytoava]

Like happyin14, my story is different from others on this board.

Ava was born December 13, 2010. She was a wonderful baby, happy and loving. She grew into an easy toddler, very sweet and caring. She was taking swim lessons and was getting ready to start dance classes. On August 28, 2014 everything changed for us.

I was on my way to work when my husband called. When I left, I assumed Ava was still asleep and I didn't check on her, not wanting to wake her because she had been up late the night before. He called saying he couldn't wake her up for school and could I come home. I thought he was just overreacting, that she was very tired but I did agree to come home. He called me again when I was five minutes away, saying that the paramedics were there working on her. I started to panic. I got home and couldn't get out of the car fast enough. My husband met me by the front door and had me sit in the living room. Our sweet girl was in our bedroom, my husband had taken her in there and put on Curious George, thinking that would help her wake up. The paramedics were in there trying to revive her. I couldn't breathe, this couldn't be happening. Meanwhile, the detectives were asking us questions. When they took her out to the ambulance I asked to go with her but they wouldn't let me. The detectives had more questions. Once they were done and allowed us to go to the hospital, I called my mom to let her know what was going on. We got to the hospital and the doctor met us outside her room. He told us that they had been trying for over an hour to get her heart started and there was no electric activity. There was nothing more they could do. They let us come in the room just before they announced time of death. I couldn't believe it, when the ambulance took her, I assumed we'd get to the hospital and she would be okay. She would spend a few days there and we'd get to go home. I never imagined that we would be leaving the hospital without her. On September 2nd, the day she was supposed to have her first dance class, instead we had her funeral. I called my mom again from the hospital that day and she and my dad got the first direct flight down to be with us. I constantly relive that day in my mind.

There was an autopsy done but they couldn't find anything. We have since connected with the SUDC or Sudden Unexplained Death in a Child foundation. They are currently working on research to find out why this happened to Ava and other children around her age. My husband and I are in the process of moving. It's become to hard to stay in the house anymore. I love and miss my sweet girl so very much.

[angelsnight]

**rainbow mentioned**

My heart is breaking for everyone as I read their stories.

MH and I had troubles getting pregnant because I ovulated so infrequently, so I thought we were so lucky when I got pregnant in December of 2011 after just 7 months. But we lost it quickly, just four days after we found out.

It took another full year to get pregnant again. I was pretty terrified of another CP but started to breathe a bit easier once in the second tri, and again once our anatomy scan showed we were having a healthy baby girl. We named her right away, Kayla Kathryn. MH loved the name Kayla, told me about it on our second date 4 years earlier. Kathryn was after my mom who passed away 10 years ago.

I had had menstrual-like cramps on and off through out my pregnancy and a couple episodes of spotting, so I was still nervous, but my doctor assured me the cramping was just my uterus stretching. The cramps went away for several weeks, but returned suddenly a few days before I hit 22 weeks. I didn't think much of them, tried to drink more water since my doctor said dehydration could also bring them on.

I was a bit worried the next day when they were still there, but still assumed it was normal. By the third day I was still cramping I was very uneasy about them, but not enough to do anything about it. I kept telling myself that having one CP doesn't mean something bad will happen this time, millions of women have babies every day, there is no reason to think I won't be one of them.

When I was still cramping the 4th day I was getting more worried. As the day went on they got more intense...I had always assumed contractions would be sharp, timeable pains, not like period cramps. I went on TB to try to calm my nerves, but read some posts about pre-term labor and how they started with menstrual type cramps. I immediately called my doctor, she said it was probably nothing but to go ahead to L&D just to get checked out.

I had also been having quite a bit of discharge for those few days, but I found plenty of women on TB saying their discharge increased around 22 weeks so I had written that off in my head. I wasn't even that nervous on the way to L&D, I was certain that even if I was in labor, they could give me something to stop the contractions, observe me for a bit and send me on my way.

Once in L&D triage they didn't hook me up to the monitor since I wasn't at 24 weeks yet, but the nurse used the doppler and I instantly felt better once I heard her beautiful strong heartbeat. The nurse assured me the cramps were probably just from stretching, but the doctor would check me out anyway.

That's when my world fell apart. They tested my discharge and confirmed that it was amniotic fluid, and the pelvic exam found that I had a tear in my bag, it was bulging and I was four centimeters dilated. The doctor(not my doc, the L&D doctor on duty) said very calmly and with no emotion that I would likely deliver within the next 24 hours and the baby wouldn't survive. It was about 11pm on a Saturday night, I was then taken up to a L&D room. Twelve hours earlier I had been discussing baby shower plans with my family, and now I was preparing to deliver and say goodbye to her.

My inlaws came up and spent the night in the hospital, though they stayed in the lounge to give us some privacy. MH fell asleep and I let him sleep since I knew the next day would be very long. Between my fear, my worry, and the contractions which were now the very painful, sharp pains I assumed contractions would be, I barely slept more than 15 minutes. It was the loneliest, scariest, longest night of my life.

The next morning I was dilated to 10 and they gave me an epi since I couldn't take the pain any longer. My water broke as my doctor was explaining what was happening to my inlaws...once it broke, she quickly ushered them out and we began. I pushed for about ten minutes and my beautiful Kayla Kathryn was born sleeping at 1 pound 1.6 ounces.

She was bruised and so tiny, but she was so beautiful. She looked like me, she had my nose and my mouth. My placenta did not come out so they inserted laminaria sticks to help dilate me again, but if the placenta wouldn't come on its own I would need a D&C. I was terrified of this because I only had so much time with Kayla and I didn't want to spend any of that in surgery. Luckily I was able to deliver it a few hours later...it was horrible, my epi had worn off by then and my doctor had to go in after it. It was the worst pain of my life, but it was worth it to not have to be separated from Kayla.

We got to have her with us that whole day, a lot of our family and friends got to come up and stay with us and hold her and we took pictures. That night she stayed in the crib beside my bed, and MH covered her with a blanket so she wouldn't get cold. It was the most heartbreaking thing to watch him take such tender care of our baby even though she couldn't feel the cold.

The next morning I woke before him, it was still dark out so I sat up, got her out of her crib and just held her and cried. It was the saddest, most beautiful moment of my life. She was with us a few more hours until the funeral home came to pick her up, and we went home a few hours after that. Four days later on Good Friday we had a very short visitation for close family and friends at the funeral home followed by her burial.

The doctors cannot say for sure, but they think I had an incompetent cervix. Testing found that I had chorio (an infection) but they cannot determine if the chorio got in once my cervix was open because of the IC, or if I didn't have IC and it was the infection that caused the pre-term labor.

It was very difficult, but we knew we wanted to try again, so once we were cleared after my six week appt we began trying again. Our first month was negative but I got pregnant my second month...this time with no help from the RE. I was a basketcase this pregnancy, I was terrified of a CP, I was terrified of a later MC, once we got past that I got to start worrying about my cervix. I did have heavy bleeding at 5 weeks and thought for sure I was losing it, but I didn't.

At 14 weeks I got a cerclage put in, and my cervix was beautiful the entire pregnancy. I never shortened below 4 cm, so doctors still don't know if I never even had IC, or if I did and the cerclage was just doing its job. Regardless, my doctor said she wouldn't feel comfortable letting me go through anymore pregnancies without a cerclage. I surprisingly had a lot of good days, but it was a stressful pregnancy. I worried a lot about my cervix, but as it turns out we had to forcefully evict. I was induced on March 18th 2014 because I was insulin dependent (gestational diabetes) and Emily Kathryn was born via C section March 19th.

She is now almost 13 months old and looks a lot like her sister. She is an amazing baby, she's getting a bit spunky and sassy as a toddler but still so sweet and I love her so so much. She resembles Kayla, but especially when she is sleeping, she sometimes is just the spitting image of her. I am so thankful for our rainbow, but I still miss Kayla so much. I think about what it would be like to have both my girls here, and it just sucks to know if Kayla had survived, Emily wouldn't be here, but Emily is here because Kayla didn't survive.

[NariaDreaming]

I just wanted to drop in and say how much I wish I could just give each and every one of you gigantic hugs. I know how irksome it can be when the view count is relatively high compared to the post count of a thread, and I just wanted to lay claim to a few of those views.

[db7211]

I realize my post is just one below this, but for continuity sake, I decided to put it here too.

I have 2 boys. Big K, who is my sunshine and going to turn 3 May 11th, and Little K, who we lost at 45 days old.

Little K's pregnancy was pretty uneventful until around 24 weeks when I started to notice my belly really hurting. It hurt when I picked up Big K and progressively got worse as the weeks went on. I mentioned it at my 24 week appointment and the doctor theorized it could be the way the baby was positioned and there was not much to worry about. Mentioned it again at 28 weeks and then again at 30 where I explained to the NP that I was having to take Tylenol everyday to help with the pain, and my belly was sooooo tight. She blew me off. A week and a half later I went in for what I thought were BH and was told I was measuring at 38 weeks and that I should schedule an ultrasound to see what was up. Two days later, after we did our maternity shoot, went to the OB office and had the ultrasound. I had polyhydraminos and the baby had hydrops. My husband and I were put on a flight-for-life up to Denver where they tried to stop the contractions and keep him in as long as possible. After 2 days it was obvious he was in distress and they needed to do an emergency c-section to get him out and treat him.

Little K was born on April 13, 2014 at 33 weeks at 6 lbs. He had sooo much fluid everywhere, in his pleural cavity, his tissues were filled with fluid. We were told sometimes they never find a reason for hydrops but that he just needed to get the fluid off of him and then get a chance to heal. We never thought he was not going to pull through. Days turned to weeks. He seemed to get better, then worse, then better. It was so bizarre. After 45 days of trying different ventilators, feeding, not feeding, peeing, not peeing, surgeries, lung biopsies, perforated bowel, we got our answer. The lung biopsy showed this crazy disease the doctors kept hoping it wasn't. Congenital pulmonary lymphangiectasia. A very rare lymphatic disease where the lymphatic vessels in the lungs are permanently dilated leaking fluid into the pulmonary cavity, not allowing his lungs to work, and when the fluid has no where else to go, it seeps into the tissues. No cure. No hope. We had to take Little K off his ventilator and held him until he passed away.

[flutterfly88]

Thanks for starting this dadalou, my heart was breaking for everyone as I read your stories, but I am encouraged by your strength as well. I've been mobile lately, so I've been reading, and now that I'm at my computer I can add my story.  (I'm sorry this is so long, once I got started it just kept coming, this is the first time I've written out the whole story in one go.)

DH and I were married in the late fall of 2013. We both knew we wanted children, so decided to NTNP and see what happened. A month after our wedding I got a BFP. We were shocked, but excited. Sadly it ended up being a blighted ovum and I miscarried around 12 weeks. Once we were medically cleared to try again we decided to NTNP again and see what happened.

June of 2014, I got my second BFP. We were excited but scared. Things looked great at our dating u/s (8 weeks) and everything went smoothly. On Sep 23, at just over 19 weeks, I had our anatomy scan. He was healthy and measured right on track. We asked for the u/s tech to record the sex, but didn't want to know at that time, we just wanted it written down and available to the midwife if we changed our minds. And then at the beginning of October felt we were "safe" and announced our pregnancy on facebook. I've come to realize there is no "safe zone"

Wed Oct 8, towards the end of my work day I notice that my underwear were damp, but chalked it up to strange, but normal discharge. The next day I had to change my underwear halfway through the day because of the wetness. Still didn't think anything of it, and after work that night, went and bought maternity clothes.

Friday Oct 10. A day I will never forget. I woke up to a wet spot on the bed. It was then I started to worry. Being a pgal, ftm, I wasn't sure if I was just being paranoid or if it was something to worry about. I posted on my bmb asking if they would call their doc/midwife for something like that. Everyone said "if you're worried, call". The first call I made was to my local nurse's hotline asking what I should do. They suggested contacting my midwife to see if it was something to get checked out. It was then that I woke up DH, as I couldn't find the midwife emergency number. I told him what was going on, but not to panic. It was probably no big deal. We found the phone number and I placed the call. After explaining what was wrong, she asked me if I had eaten breakfast. I hadn't so she said to take my time and have some breakfast, then come to the birthing unit at the hospital. I called my boss to say that I was going to the hospital to get checked out, and would be in to work after that. I was 21 weeks, 4 days.

When we arrived at the hospital, I was put in the triage area of the birthing unit. A nurse checked my vitals, and gave me a gown. The midwife came, she read my file, and was optimistic, based off the u/s, she said my cervix was long and closed. It was then decided to use the dating from our dating week u/s (according to lmp was 8 weeks exactly that day, but measured 1 day behind.) The midwife's reasoning was if you go overdue, it's better to use the younger date, so that they aren't as quick to induce.

I was taken to the exam room (dh was allowed to come to), the midwife did an internal check. I could hear the panic in her voice as she asked the nurse to call the OB. From ten on, I knew whatever happened wouldn't be good. The OB came in, took some swabs (the midwife had done a couple already, I think, that parts a little blurry). Then examined one, it was positive for amniotic fluid. I was told that my membranes were bulging and my cervix was somewhat dilated. I had an incompetent cervix. DH and I were given a few minutes alone, and then I was admitted and given my own room. We contacted family and friends and thought I would give birth any time. We asked the midwife if she could find out the sex of our baby. We had names picked out, and wanted to use his or her name for as long as possible. A little while later, she came back and said we were having a boy. Parker Jacob Alexander was the name we had decided on. Each name had a special meaning to us. 

The nurses and midwife prepared my room as they thought I would be giving birth that night. The next day, I was moved to an antipartum room, and there I stayed for 9 long days. Every day we lasted was one step closer to a chance at Parker surviving. We read to him, sang to him, talked to him and prayed over him. In the early morning hours of Oct 15, my water broke. The nurse who was on duty came and assisted me, and cried with us. There wasn't a lot of fluid, and she told me to expect more big gushes. They never came. We called our doula and she came and sat with us and played soft baby music. Her presence was a comfort, and she gave us wise counsel. She also found a little knitted outfit that would be about the right size for a baby of Parker's size.

We were given the option of inducing labour, and I wanted to give in and give up. I felt exhausted and defeated, but Dh felt that we should let things play out in their own time. God was in control, and it was not for us to decide. Deep in my heart I felt this too, and knew that I would beat myself up with the what-ifs, if we had induced that day. Our pastor also came that day and helped us decide what we felt was the right decision. That was the day that DH and I resolved that Parker belonged to God, and we could trust Him no matter what. 

From that day on I had contractions, but usually about 5 an hour and would only last for a couple hours at a time. I didn't eat a whole lot, and most of it didn't stay down anyway. On October 19th, I started to feel awful, my temp was in the normal range, but I felt too warm then chilled, and just felt off. The discharge I had also changed that day. Late in the evening of that night, the nurse called the on call OB to do an internal check. At that point, I was almost fully dilated and the cord was prolapsing. He still had a heartbeat though. We called our parents to update them, and asked my doula to come. 

I was moved back to the room I was in the first night of my stay. It was around 1 am wen we did the move. Our parking had expired, so DH got me settled and ran down to extend our parking. While he was gone, a nurse came in and confirmed that we only wanted comfort care. I said yes, but now wish I had asked what our options were. From everything the doctors said, they weren't going to even try and help him before 24 weeks, and by their calculations his was still 22 weeks. 

I laboured on and off through the night. When the contractions weren't bad I managed a little bit of sleep. Around 6:00am on October 20th, things really stalled. My midwife checked, and didn't feel a pulse in the cord. I decided then to take the medication to speed things along, and at 7:55 am my Parker was born alive, shoulder first. He weighed 1lb 11 oz, and was 31 cm long. He had long skinny legs, and long fingers and big feet. He even made a little sound as he was trying to breathe. I thought he only lived about 10 minutes, but according to my doula we had about an hour with him alive. 

My parent's and DH's parents came up and we took lots of pictures. A friend stopped by, expecting just to visit, not knowing that he had been born. Then everyone left and we got some sleep. we kept Parker with us for the day and had the rest of our families come up in the evening. My SMIL arranged for a NILMDTS photographer to come as well. Everyone left, although the nurses allowed them to stay past the visiting hours. We kept him with us a little while longer, and then gave him to the nurse to take down to the hospital morgue. 

We said our last good-bye a few weeks later and buried him in the cemetery where my DH's mom is buried. Right now we try and visit him every couple of weeks. 

Here is a picture of my sweet boy:

SPOILER: Click to show

[kateaggie]

flutterfly88, he's beautiful. Thank you for sharing him with us.

[littleowl913]

flutterfly88, Parker is beautiful!

[flutterfly88]

Thank-you kateaggie & littleowl913

[happyin14]

flutterfly88 - Parker is perfect. Is that your nose? I love it.

[flutterfly88]

Apr 18, 2015 19:39:25 GMT -5 happyin14 said:

flutterfly88 - Parker is perfect. Is that your nose? I love it.

Thank-you. He was born with a little red spot on his nose, which the NILMDTS edited out, it was most likely a bruise from birth. He was so bruised all over from the way he came out. The midwife thought he was coming bum first but he surprised her and came out shoulder first. 

[shandorfml2]

Thanks dadalou, great idea.

*rainbow mentioned*

We started trying to get pregnant in Feb 2012. We were happily surprised to get pregnant a few months later in June, since I have PCOS and I thought it would be more difficult. I had a healthy, uneventful pregnancy. We found out the day before halloween that we were having a little girl, and we already had her name picked out. Anastasia Maeve. Similar to angelsnight,My husband had told me in the beginning of our relationship that his first daughter would be Anastasia. I fell in love with the name over the years.

Fast forward to my 36 week apt. We were all ready for her arrival. I had had my baby showers and her nursery was ready. They couldn't find her heart beat and sent us to the hospital for an ultrasound. It was confirmed there that our daughter was gone. I was sent home and induced the next morning. Labor was easy and I was able to have her vaginally. She was born March 2nd, 2013 after 20 minutes of pushing. They found no reason for her death. She was beautiful, and my husband, myself and our families were completely devastated. It was the worst day of my life. I really don't know how I got through it. We stayed with her overnight and held her and took pictures. I love my angel Ana so, so much.

We started trying again right away and this time it took us a year and a half to get pregnant. In the mean time my mother died from pancreatic cancer, and this was very difficult. I know she is with Ana now and they watch over my rainbow boy, born on April 2nd 2015.

Mommy loves and misses you Ana!


Thanks for sharing your stories everyone