+< Weekly Check In 4/14/15 >+

[icequeen]

Hi y'all!

Hope you're all doing well. Time for the weekly check in, so please update us on how everything has been going for you since last week and if you have any particular concerns, questions, or need support. Please PM me if you would like to be tagged for participation.

flcl, mrsb1008, yoshijo28, @rocknrollfriend, @wallflwr926, @ordinaryamy, runnergirl812, helloamanda, @giamia923, snarkysparklefart, @alleykat05, bluerainfire, sko14, @erin2021, spencer1337, RedDDD

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Please state your diagnosis and/or status:

How is your week going?

Any struggles or accomplishments you would like to share?

Any changes in medication or recent appointments?

GTKY: What is your most embarrassing moment?

[RedDDD]

Please state your diagnosis and/or status: Depression/anxiety

How is your week going? Ok, we are leaving to visit my family Thursday and coming back Monday. Big flight for two toddlers. Its pretty stressful because its expensive and you just never know how the kids are going to be. We flew in Jan and they were pretty good so fingers crossed.

Any struggles or accomplishments you would like to share? Struggling a little with some symptoms since I just started the meds. Some heightened anxiety, heart racing, a little dizzy. Woke up with my LO last night and normally I go right back to sleep but I felt like an anxiety attack was coming on....I just worked to focus on breathing and relaxing and I finally fell asleep. Not sure if that is the meds or just me getting nervous for our trip

Any changes in medication or recent appointments? No

GTKY: What is your most embarrassing moment? I don't really get embarrassed that easily, I typically laugh it off so its hard for me to think of one. Maybe my skirt flying up in high school ?

[Deleted]

Please state your diagnosis and/or status:GAD, depression

How is your week going?This week has been going really well! I'm not sure if it's the nice weather or the fact that I have changed up my diet, but I'm having a really positive week.

Any struggles or accomplishments you would like to share?Struggles- still trying to find my husband work. It's getting pretty nerve racking, but we are now considering looking into different Provinces. It would be really hard, but we are running out of options. Accomplishments- Although we have been very stressed, we have been able to keep positive about things. I think the most important thing we can do right now, is be positive.

Any changes in medication or recent appointments?None and none.

GTKY: What is your most embarrassing moment?Oh geez! In high school I had this MASSIVE crush on a boy I ran track and field with. After running the 400m, I was waiting to hear if I had broke the city record. Well, me and him were hanging around and I heard the announcement confirm that I DID break the record. So I jumped up and down, hugged him and then went to run away to find my parents to celebrate, and I bailed on my ass...HARD! I was so embarrassed that I got up and just kept running! I know he saw me fall, and I could feel my eyes fill up with tears from embarrassment, but he/anyone else never said anything.

It sounds so little now when I read it out loud, but at that moment it was huge! I was a VERY dorky girl, and he was hot shit! So looking even more ridiculous in front of him was probably the worst thing that happened to me that year lol!

[booksntea]

Status: Resolving anger and anxiety issues.

How is your week going? Ok. LO and I were both sick or possibly dealing with allergies. I felt tired and LO was pretty cranky.

Any struggles or accomplishments you would like to share? One of my coworkers PMd just to ask me how old I was. I am older than many of my coworkers which I try to hide because of agism in the department. I think she asked my age because she has her own hang up about aging or something and it makes her feel better that I am older than her. But, I told her my age and now regret it. The next day she totally made some wisecrack that alluded to how she was a baby when I started my career, which totally made my blood boil.

Any changes in medication or recent appointments? n/a

GTKY: What is your most embarrassing moment? when I was in Elementary school I came to school with my pants on backwards...I was sent to the bathroom to put them on right, but I couldn't figure it out and came back with them still on wrong and all the other kids were dying with laughter at my predicament.

[helloamanda]

Please state your diagnosis and/or status: Depression and anxiety

How is your week going? Finally getting over the flu/some weird virus, so better. I'm going to work tomorrow for the first time in a week, since I don't have a fever or anything contagious anymore- Just tired and some tummy problems.

Any struggles or accomplishments you would like to share? I've been really anxious about missing work, since I've never missed this many shifts since working there, but my manager didn't even notice I had missed 3 in a row and needed a dr note. Had a few moments of "why me" during the flu, but I think everyone goes through that at some point, right? Today I accomplished going to Target, yay! I know it's not much, but I've barely been out of bed the last week!

Any changes in medication or recent appointments? Nope. Missed therapy last week so trying to get in this week still.

GTKY: What is your most embarrassing moment? Lots of embarrassing moments with boys. lol Probably the one that sticks out the most was in 8th grade, I was recovering from a cold and had cough drop in my mouth while I was talking to a really hot guy that I had a crush on. He made me laugh and I spit the cough drop out and it hit him in the face lol omg another one that came to mind: first time my bf in high school and I made out in his car, he laid on top of me and I burped in his face lol What is my deal!!!

[juliayadda]

Please state your diagnosis and/or status: Depression, and anxiety and all the stuff that goes with it

How is your week going? Great actually. It is sunny! Like what a relief! The snow is freaking gone! All of it!

Any struggles or accomplishments you would like to share? My struggle this week is my house is messyish again. I can see the slippage. We just need to hire a maid already!

Any changes in medication or recent appointments? nada

GTKY: What is your most embarrassing moment?

When I was six I pulled a chair out from my friends mom who was holding her three yearold while she sat down. Then her mom fell on the floor. I never lived it down... She did turn out to be one of my bffs in highschool, but somehow the chair always came up..

[juliayadda]

@erin2021, What field is he in? I am great at looking for jobs for other people.

[Deleted]

Apr 14, 2015 17:24:44 GMT -5 juliayadda said:

@erin2021, What field is he in? I am great at looking for jobs for other people.

Teaching, sports/recreation, program manager etc. He's applied to a few teaching jobs in Hamilton for private schools but they want him part time now to start. We cant afford that so he's trying to open up more and look at things related to teaching, but not limited to.

Thanks @juiliayadda!I really appreciate that!

[Deleted]

@sluttybigb00bz, I never had the balls to do hurdles for that exact reason! I was so afraid I would fall and run off crying. At least you finished and didn't let it get to you! I've seen some pretty nasty falls with hurdles so you getting up and finishing is bad ass!

[yoshijo28]

RedDDD I hope your flight goes smoothly and that you enjoy your trip!
@erin2021 I'm glad you're having a good week! Job hunting is extremely stressful, I hope YH can find something soon
booksntea your co-worker is really sucky for saying something like that. I hope she doesn't continue to think it's something she can joke about
helloamanda glad you're feeling better! I also would freak out if I missed work, but you definitely can't work with the flu!
juliayadda glad you're having a good week. We finally got a 70 degree day here, it's great
@sluttybigb00bz is your RE going to recommend a certain therapist? Is that why you have to tell him?


Diagnosis: Anorexia, OCD, anxiety

How is your week going? Physically I've had some scary moments (heart racing/skipping, feeling fuzzy) and finally went to the dr. The EKG turned out fine thankfully. Waiting on some blood test results.

Struggles/Accomplishments: I'm really struggling with exercising. Last week I added on 1.5 hours of cardio (and an extra day) and tonight I added 15 minutes to my routine. I feel like since I can't lose much more weight now (I've plateaued and would need to make more changes to lose more weight) I can play the compensation game where I have to make up for extra calories I may consume later in the week. I feel like I need to bank negative calories in case I can't work out or have to eat something that's not planned. I'm just really paranoid about gaining weight so I'm adding time to my exercising to prevent it.

Changes in therapy/medications: nope, just met with the therapist today.

GTKY: *TMI warning*
In college my then boyfriend and I were going to have sex and AF started during foreplay. It was really the worst possible timing ever. Yup, that's possible.Awkward..

[yoshijo28]

@sluttybigb00bz gotcha, that makes sense. I'm sure they are used to the request and won't think anything of it even if you have to be the one to bring it up. Starting therapy is nerve wracking, I hope your appointment goes well! Let us know.

[bluerainfire]

Please state your diagnosis and/or status: ptsd, anxiety, throw in a touch of salt and pepper of depression

How is your week going? ok- been at work most of the week

Any struggles or accomplishments you would like to share? trying to stay positive- like today my dd got really excited over blue jello at the deli department, its the little things-weather is nicer so generally I am happier person because I can go outside and look at all the beauty of nature-

struggles- co-workers bringing subjects up about my life, that I don't know how to response too. I just usually say I am ok, or that happened and I am stronger person- shrugs- also i don't know if they really want to hear the real response- also someone on the boards posted something about attention seekers and trauma- I got a little mad- in my life when it rained hard-



Any changes in medication or recent appointments? no, but I would like to go into a ptsd group that is non millitary- i think ptsd is a lot more common, and a lot more people have it- such as people who have lost a child, misscaried, handle any abused etc.

GTKY: What is your most embarrassing moment? tmi, the ex-boyfriend and I were doing it in his bed room, and his cousin open the door mid romp- the position we were in wasn't the most favorable, and it was his cousin...meck

[flcl]

RedDDD, best of luck on the trip!! I hope your LOs are good for you and you have so much fun!

@erin2021, your most embarrassing moment sounds kinda sweet Glad you're having a positive week and FX with finding H a job

booksntea, your co-worker may have been a baby when you started your career but sure seems like she's still a baby. Sorry you're dealing with that crap.

helloamanda, glad you're finally feeling better!... the flu can really knock you on your butt!

juliayadda, glad you're having a good week. hope the nice weather is helping you tolerate some of your annoying co-workers!

@sluttybigb00bz, glad you're taking some time to do things for yourself. Good luck with your RE appointment!

yoshijo28, sorry you were experiencing some scary symptoms... glad that the EKG turned out ok. Hope the bloodwork turns out ok too!

bluerainfire, geez, do your co-workers know how they're making you feel with bringing up certain subjects? I have a hard time with nosy co-workers and how to properly respond to them... Good luck, I hope that gets better.


Please state your diagnosis and/or status: depression, anxiety, anxiety attacks

How is your week going? Ok... work's been consuming my life so I need to work hard at keeping myself grounded

Any struggles or accomplishments you would like to share? I guess this can fall under both?? I went to a conference yesterday for work and half of it was about self-injury. The woman was very graphic and it was difficult to not feel the urge to self injure. You would think someone who works with people who self-harm would know better on what to say/not say in case there are those who struggle with it in the audience. The good news is even though I kept thinking about it, I didn't do it.

Any changes in medication or recent appointments? nope, status quo

GTKY: What is your most embarrassing moment? This probably doesn't qualify as most embarrassing since I was so young when it happened... definitely would have been mortified if I was older. When I was about 5 years old, I got pushed and fell into an area under construction and got GLUED TO THE FLOOR OF THE MALL! They had to cut me out... cut my hair, cut my dress, shoes... everything.

[KayVeeKay]

Diagnosis/status: PPD and seeking treatment

How's my week: Lots of ups and downs. I'm thankful this is my last day before I take off for a week and a half to get away.

Accomplishments: I have managed not to cry at work for the past three days despite still being an emotional wreck. I'm also trying to thank everyone in my life and tell them how much they're appreciated. This includes you guys, and I know I went into more detail last week, but I really love the open arms you all welcomed me with and the support!

Struggles: I'm still struggling with my decision to take medication. I keep wondering if it'll even work, if LO's weight gain issues are just going to get worse with the Prozac, if my milk is going to dry up because I've seen a huge dip in supply the past few days, and so many other things. I'm also struggling with mindfulness. It is so hard not to blame myself for everything, and I think that's largely because I can't accept that such a long string of bad things could happen to me without it being my fault.

Meds: 10mg Prozac started over the weekend

GTKY: I volunteered to sing the national anthem for a big graduation a few years ago, and even though I developed a head cold a few days before, I still opted to sing. My voice cracked and I sang off key for the whole song. It was so awful, and try as I might I could not get back on key. I haven't been able to sing in public since.

[KayVeeKay]

booksntea I would be upset about that myself. It's such a jerk thing to do. Also, kids are mean.

helloamanda I feel bad when I miss work, too. Do you love your job? That may be the source of anxiety about missing it or even something else. Do you get paid sick days?

@sluttybigb00bz I'm a huge klutz, so this sounds like something I would've done! Glad to hear that the crowd was supportive!

juliayadda I need a maid, too. My MIL says it saves marriages. Hope you have better luck finding one than I have!

bluerainfire I think saying "I'm ok" is just a defense mechanism. The military can make it so hard to show emotions, too. I hope it gets easier day to day. PTSD is no joke.

flcl Some people just don't think. I'm glad you were able to work through it!

[helloamanda]

KayVeeKay I do love my job! I do newborn photography, so there's no way in the world I could go in sick. I'm only part time, and on commission so I don't get paid time off or sick leave. So I missed out on money those days, but I mostly work to get out of the house because that's when my depression gets bad. Mindfulness is very hard at first. It's something you have to practice every day. I had a hard time with it, and still do sometimes. What do you usually do? Any exercises? If you can, I find guided imagery helpful

[KayVeeKay]

Apr 15, 2015 11:12:33 GMT -5 helloamanda said:

KayVeeKay I do love my job! I do newborn photography, so there's no way in the world I could go in sick. I'm only part time, and on commission so I don't get paid time off or sick leave. So I missed out on money those days, but I mostly work to get out of the house because that's when my depression gets bad. Mindfulness is very hard at first. It's something you have to practice every day. I had a hard time with it, and still do sometimes. What do you usually do? Any exercises? If you can, I find guided imagery helpful

I do breathing exercises and meditation/grounding techniques when I can. My therapy has focused on getting my thoughts away from feeling sorry myself. For example, if I catch myself thinking My daughter hates me, I think of the reasons that can't be true, like the fact that she smiles when she sees me and reaches for me when I go to pick her up. Stuff like that is getting easier, but it's really hard to accept that x is not my fault because I don't have any cold hard facts to back that up.

[blush]

Apr 14, 2015 12:52:58 GMT -5 icequeen said:

Please state your diagnosis and/or status: Depression/Anxiety although lately it is pretty much anxiety.

How is your week going? It has been busy so far. I am eating healthier and feel at least physically better than before.

Any struggles or accomplishments you would like to share? I am struggling more with anxiety. I am waking multiple times throughout the night even on nights where A is sleeping better.

Any changes in medication or recent appointments? I have recently started medication and although I haven't seen much improvemnet yet I know it takes time. The doctor I saw is following up in 2 weeks to decide if we should inrease the dose or what the next step it.

GTKY: What is your most embarrassing moment? I am not sure about this. Being shy and having anxiety I have been embarrassed many times but I don't think most of those situations are things that are really supposed to be embarrassing. I will have to give it more though, sorry I can't think of anything interesting or funny  

[icequeen]

RedDDD, I completely get the flight anxiety! I travel quite frequently with DD (17 mos) and I always make sure I have lots of snacks, a blanket, her favorite toys/books, 2 bottles of milk and juice, extra diapers, wipes, paper towels, wet ones, extra change of clothes. I always bring one big backpack to put all her stuff in, and a small purse to throw around my shoulder with my IDs and boarding pass. I never bring the stroller if DD can walk or I can carry her because it is a huge pain. Good luck! Just remember it's only a few hours out of your day.
@erin2021, I am so proud of your strides and how positive you are being. I hope everything works out with YH's employment soon. I can only imagine how stressful that is.
booksntea, I cannot believe how unprofessional your CW is being. Next time she tries to trap you into a question like that, just say point blank that you don't think your age matters when it comes to your work performance. Or be jokey, like "Well how old do you think I am" or "I'm young at heart and that's what matters" or something else. Or just ignore her.
helloamanda, I'm glad you are feeling better and that you can go to therapy soon!
juliayadda, you seem to be doing great! Mess does tend to creep up but just take it one room at a time. I also hope you got the meds you were running low on last week.
@sluttybigb00bz, great job with the running! You need that time for yourself. Good luck at the RE and with your list of Q's!
yoshijo28, I am so relieved you went to the Dr because I know you've been feeling crappy for a while. It seems like the ED behaviors are starting to control you and I hope your therapist can help you break free from those compulsions or lessen their control on you.
bluerainfire, I would just tell your CW's that you are not comfortable discussing those details with them and instead offer to go out for a coffee or lunch. I love how you are seeing the little things that make the days special. I would record them in a journal and read them once in a while.
flcl, wow that conference must have been triggering and you did amazing! I don't know if I would have been that strong.
KayVeeKay, good job for not being overly emotional at work. I know how hard that is and I think it would be great if you still kept your options open about other jobs so you don't have to move away. You also need to accept that even if you do make mistakes and bad things happen to you or to LO, it doesn't make you a terrible person or mom. You need to forgive yourself for your flaws because there is no way you are intentionally sick.
blush, definitely give yourself time with the meds. I am happy that you are not having any visible side effects so the pace you are going at now seems good. Is there any other time of day you can get a quick nap in? Maybe when YH comes home from work? Or maybe you can cut down on any other activities to get some sleep? I know this is hard because I only get about 5 hours a night and maybe a quick 30 minute nap in the afternoon when DD is sleeping.

Please state your diagnosis and/or status: anorexia nervosa, bulimia nervosa, GAD

How is your week going? Not great. I had a nice weekend at my mom's house with DD but my whole routine was thrown off and my ED behaviors crept back in. Today everything looks good at RE appointment so I'm thankful for that. I am really stressing because my RE is also a colleague of mine that I collaborated with in the past, and he now wants me to do some work for him so we can publish a paper together.

Any struggles or accomplishments you would like to share? I threw up twice this past week because I wasn't mindful while I was eating and I was completely distracted and thrown of schedule. I feel really upset about this because I really didn't want to relapse and didn't think it would happen. I feel like a failure. But I'm just going to keep trying, back from square 1.

Any changes in medication or recent appointments? Therapy appointment tomorrow

GTKY: What is your most embarrassing moment? When I was on my engagement trip to Mexico, I was walking along a bridge crossing a pond in our hotel. It was right in front of the huge glass windows where everyone was having breakfast buffet and I just walked off the bridge and into the water and broke my toe.

[Deleted]

Please state your diagnosis and/or status: anxiety and depression, under treatment.

How is your week going? ok. I had pneumonia last week and felt a bit sorry for myself, but I'm starting to feel better.

Any struggles or accomplishments you would like to share? I've had a short temper with DS at bedtime the past few nights. I always feel like crap when I don't treat him as well as I think I should.

Any changes in medication or recent appointments? Psychiatrist appointment on Monday. We agreed the bupropion and BCPs are working well for my depression and mood swings, and that I should see a therapist for my anxiety. She suggested another office in our medical group I could try, but I still need to figure out if our new insurance will cover this medical group.

GTKY: What is your most embarrassing moment? TMI - in middle school I was still learning how to manage AF. In class I got up to get something and heard some of the boys behind me snickering. I gave them the side eye but they didn't say anything. I went to the bathroom after class and my pad had leaked through my pants.. so, so gross and embarrassing. Thank goodness I had my sweater to tie around my waist for the rest of the day. Ugh!

[mrsb1008]

Please state your diagnosis and/or status: Panic Disorder and GAD

How is your week going? It's going ok. I came down with a very mild stomach bug but it was enough that I decided to stay home for most of this week. I think some of that is the anxiety creeping in since vomiting is my biggest trigger. Luckily it never came to that and I was still able to eat all week, but I still felt better staying at home and relaxing. I think I also just needed a break from work and this just seemed like a good time to get some R&R

Any struggles or accomplishments you would like to share? Nothing really to report here.

Any changes in medication or recent appointments? Nope (we have our A/S next week though!)

GTKY: What is your most embarrassing moment? I don't know if I have one. I'm a pretty clumsy person, so I frequently trip walking or that sort of thing. I'd probably have to go back to elementary school for it. Maybe the time my teacher yelled at me in front of the whole class in 3rd grade and ripped my paper off the chalkboard?

[runnergirl812]

Please state your diagnosis and/or status: GAD

How is your week going? It's had its ups and downs. Mostly ups. I desperately want my sunshine back (it's been raining all week, making everything green).

Any struggles or accomplishments you would like to share? I have a phone interview tomorrow! Incredibly (naturally) nervous about it, but will hopefully be okay.

Any changes in medication or recent appointments? No changes in meds. Had a therapist appointment today. I love her. She's my soft yet hard, safe spot.

GTKY: What is your most embarrassing moment? Oh I have many. Most embarrassing was probably walking into a pole during a campus tour when I was in college. I was campus tour guide in college, so there I was, walking backwards, giving an admissions tour, and turned around JUST IN TIME to smack nose first into the lightpole that I "knew" was there. Embarrassing.

[icequeen]

@rocknrollfriend, I'm glad you are feeling better. I'm sure you have many more good days than bad days as a mom and your son absolutely realizes that and loves you for it. Don't be too hard on yourself.

mrsb1008, sounds like you definitely got to relax and de-stress. FX for a great A/S!

runnergirl812, wow you are making so many strides with these job opportunities. I am so impressed. All the best for your interview, I hope something positive comes out of it!

[runnergirl812]

I'm trying to get out of here!! Lol. Wish me luck. I hope I get an offer.

[Deleted]

Apr 16, 2015 19:02:10 GMT -5 runnergirl812 said:

I'm trying to get out of here!! Lol. Wish me luck. I hope I get an offer.

Good luck!!

[icequeen]

runnergirl812, how did your interview go??

[runnergirl812]

Apr 17, 2015 20:28:04 GMT -5 icequeen said:

runnergirl812, how did your interview go??

I had two phone interviews on Friday with the COO and the President of the company. Both were supposed to be 30 minute interviews, but each ran about 50 minutes. So I was on the phone from 11-1pm, essentially. I think they went well. They both really wanted to know why I would leave my current job to essential "go back" to writing full-time. My current job is 40/60, writing/strategic planning. They wanted to make sure that I knew that the job description is more like 80% writing/20% project management. I am definitely okay with that. I miss writing. And while, yes, the hours will likely be longer, the job will allow me more flexibility. AND it's 100% HOME BASED!!!!! So no more cubicle land hell.

So now I'm waiting to hear back from their HR director or the recruiter for next step instructions (if they want to go there). I got a good impression that I'll be asked for a face-to-face interview. So here's hoping!!!

Edited to add: It's 5 hours later, and I've heard from the recruiter about trying to schedule a face to face interview sometime in the next two weeks. I ALSO have received 2 more calls from recruiters - one of which looks interesting. These have all been unsolicited, so I'm thinking Santa must have thought I was a good girl this year. I'm hoping at least one of these will come through. LinkedIn is really helping me out here.