DH is a high school coach so we're going to the team's end of year BBQ at the school this afternoon! I'm looking forward to an afternoon of sitting outside in the sun while the team plays with DS and lets me relax a little.
DH is a high school coach so we're going to the team's end of year BBQ at the school this afternoon! I'm looking forward to an afternoon of sitting outside in the sun while the team plays with DS and lets me relax a little.
I'm not up to much today. We're at the park for a little bit, and then we'll head home and face the six or seven loads of laundry that await. One of those loads is cloth diapers that have been sitting too long, so that'll monopolize the washer for a while... I think that folding laundry is soothing and satisfying, though, so that's something!
DH is a high school coach so we're going to the team's end of year BBQ at the school this afternoon! I'm looking forward to an afternoon of sitting outside in the sun while the team plays with DS and lets me relax a little.
That sounds great! What sport does he coach?
He coaches wrestling. The season has been over for a while but we always throw an end of the year BBQ in the spring where he gives out team and individual awards. It's a lot more fun to do that stuff outside when it's nice and warm than to crowd into somewhere when it's still snowing outside.
I'm not up to much today. We're at the park for a little bit, and then we'll head home and face the six or seven loads of laundry that await. One of those loads is cloth diapers that have been sitting too long, so that'll monopolize the washer for a while... I think that folding laundry is soothing and satisfying, though, so that's something!
I'm the exact opposite. Folding laundry and then actually having to put it away is my least favorite chore. Thankfully, DH loves doing laundry so that's become his thing. Have a great time at the park!!
Hi ladies Happy Sunday! We went to the pond (for walking and playground, not swimming, brrr!) and now DS is napping. Dinner is in the crock pot and smells amazing. I work tonight so not a lot else going on... Besides laundry, haha. muirmaid I also find it weirdly satisfying but I still procrastinate doing it... I hope everyone has a good Sunday!
muirmaid I also find it weirdly satisfying but I still procrastinate doing it...
Totally. Soooo many loads waiting. My husband usually does the put-in-washer/dryer steps, so I have no control over the order and he always ends up saving the delicates for last, which means we don't ever actually get to them. They just lie there in the basement sad and alone all week. I have to have a Come to Jesus talk with him periodically about it because that's basically where all my work clothes are. Not to mention bras. Gah!
We slept in this morning after a fun day with my cousin and his family yesterday. Then we went for a Sunday drive to J's office to pick something up. Alex LOVED all the fish. There were 5 large aquariums of native local fish species in various sizes. He kept moving and climbing ladders so he could see them up close and say Hi to them. Now I am watching Sisterhood of the Travelling Pants and crocheting.
I was at church all morning (I play piano and sing every Sunday). We were at a concert last night and did not get home until 1:30 AM. So as soon as L goes down for a nap I probably will too. Then it's the regular family dinner this evening and Mad Men.
My dh coached too. Luckily he coaches golf so I don't have to go and watch. We didn't do much this weekend. We are moving so we did a lot of stuff for the new house and sort of neglected the one we are living in. We're going out to dinner in a bit and I'm treating myself to some wine for the first time in forever. Can't wait!
I just made the yummiest dinner of pulled pork, and made C his own mini cheese quesadilla on the side. And all he will eat tonight is sour cream. Toddler taste buds. I just don't get them. Haha.
unringthebell, the worst thing about aging has got to be the dramatic drop in how much alcohol it takes to cause a hangover. If I haven't had enough water in the day or two previous, it only takes two beers to set off a pounding headache. No fair!
I just made the yummiest dinner of pulled pork, and made C his own mini cheese quesadilla on the side. And all he will eat tonight is sour cream. Toddler taste buds. I just don't get them. Haha.
To be fair, sour cream IS delicious.
(But I'll never understand how a person could pass up a cheese quesadilla, regardless of age.)
I just made the yummiest dinner of pulled pork, and made C his own mini cheese quesadilla on the side. And all he will eat tonight is sour cream. Toddler taste buds. I just don't get them. Haha.
Why don't they eat?! DS has lived on apple sauce and yogurt for the past two weeks. He won't touch anything else and I haven't had the energy to really fight it. Toddlers are weird, man.
We slept in this morning after a fun day with my cousin and his family yesterday. Then we went for a Sunday drive to J's office to pick something up. Alex LOVED all the fish. There were 5 large aquariums of native local fish species in various sizes. He kept moving and climbing ladders so he could see them up close and say Hi to them. Now I am watching Sisterhood of the Travelling Pants and crocheting.
Sisterhood of the Travelling Pants is one of my favorite guilty pleasure movies. It's one of those that I have to stop and watch if it's on TV. Love it!
Posting here because I'm too lazy to start a Monday thread. Can we just make this last all week? We ran errands yesterday morning and early afternoon, chilled at home for naptime with an easy dinner of pasta and tomato sauce. Early bedtime and here we are on Monday.
Triggers and such.
I'm sad. One of my friends is having a boy in June. Her due date is just under a week earlier than mine would have been. She's 30 weeks today.
I keep looking at these and it makes me sad. Link1Link2 I guess I shouldn't keep looking at them, but I do.
Ugh eaglewife I am so sorry. My best friend in the whole world is due May 20th. I was due June 5th. It has been so hard to watch what should have been my future. I have honestly kept my distance physically (which is easier because we live in different states) but we met for lunch after my last BFP and it was still a punch in the gut. We are heading there this weekend, and after losing that baby too I know it won't be easy... No advice just ((hugs)). Actually, advice... Stop looking at those! But I know it's easier said than done. I can't stop lurking Dec 15. I wish I could. But I can't.
Ugh fuck fuck fuck. Sorry about my swears (I promise I don't swear in front of my toddler). I just checked my voicemail after getting my two hours of sleep after my night shift (so I'm already tired and emotional) and I got a call from my MW's office confirming my initial pregnancy appt for Wednesday. Goddamit. I don't need that any more, obviously. And they were the ones who verified that. I feel like I got slapped. Now I need to call back and cancel. I am switching offices. They are so insensitive. When I called to schedule my follow up for my d&c last time, they asked me when I delivered. I can't take it. This isn't going to be a pretty phone call. Ugh ugh ugh.
Ugh fuck fuck fuck. Sorry about my swears (I promise I don't swear in front of my toddler). I just checked my voicemail after getting my two hours of sleep after my night shift (so I'm already tired and emotional) and I got a call from my MW's office confirming my initial pregnancy appt for Wednesday. Goddamit. I don't need that any more, obviously. And they were the ones who verified that. I feel like I got slapped. Now I need to call back and cancel. I am switching offices. They are so insensitive. When I called to schedule my follow up for my d&c last time, they asked me when I delivered. I can't take it. This isn't going to be a pretty phone call. Ugh ugh ugh.
WTF leahks77,'s shitty MW office!!! That's horrible, on both counts. I'm so sorry you had to deal with that.
Most of the time my OB office is great, but when I followed up for my first MC, the lady gave me a form for "post op" - I told her it didn't apply. She's like, "Well, why are you here?" I told her I'm her to follow up with my doctor after my miscarriage. Because he told me to come in! WTF. Ugh. Why can't people think and be more sensitive?
**sorry for tag mixup, leahks77, and fabk, - evidence that there is not enough coffee in my day yet. :S
eaglewife I think that tag was meant for me but if fabk has a shitty MW office too, WTF to them as well! And I'm sorry yours needs some sensitivity training as well! I'm tempted to talk them through better options to say when I call. Maybe they have never been educated. Ugh. At least my annoyance is replacing my sadness. F them. And they can wait. DS is napping next to me and I'm going to soak up baby snuggles. He's warm and smells fantastic and his fat little fingers keep reaching for my face. I love him. I'm going to focus on this for a while and call them later when I'm not so ragey.
leahks77, I'm so sorry you have to deal with that. I had a similar experience last week and it just baffles me that these offices can be so insensitive, considering the line of work that they're in.
I was calling in to schedule a follow-up appt to confirm whether my MC was complete and the very first question I was asked was "are you pregnant?" which immediately made me cry. I gave them a verbal lashing and haven't had any issues since, but definitely considered switching offices after that.
Oh no unringthebell I'm sorry you had the crappy call too! And I'm sorry you're running on nothing today. Bad nights are the worst. I don't sleep well at all the nights DS ends up with us. Also why I'm not sleeping now while he is, even though I could use it. I hope your day goes by fast and you can go to bed early tonight!
eaglewife I think that tag was meant for me but if fabk has a shitty MW office too, WTF to them as well! And I'm sorry yours needs some sensitivity training as well! I'm tempted to talk them through better options to say when I call. Maybe they have never been educated. Ugh. At least my annoyance is replacing my sadness. F them. And they can wait. DS is napping next to me and I'm going to soak up baby snuggles. He's warm and smells fantastic and his fat little fingers keep reaching for my face. I love him. I'm going to focus on this for a while and call them later when I'm not so ragey.
Do this! We shouldn't have to, but sometimes they need a reminder that their patients are people and are going through really shitty experiences. Their words and actions have a HUGE impact on our experiences and they should know that they are making yours more difficult than it needs to be.
eaglewife I think that tag was meant for me but if fabk has a shitty MW office too, WTF to them as well! And I'm sorry yours needs some sensitivity training as well! I'm tempted to talk them through better options to say when I call. Maybe they have never been educated. Ugh. At least my annoyance is replacing my sadness. F them. And they can wait. DS is napping next to me and I'm going to soak up baby snuggles. He's warm and smells fantastic and his fat little fingers keep reaching for my face. I love him. I'm going to focus on this for a while and call them later when I'm not so ragey.
Yes, so sorry leahks77, all fixed. Enjoy those sweet snuggley times. I definitely find myself spending longer and longer rocking and cuddling my girl lately. It seems to help some. Kudos to you for calming down before calling. I should do that more often too.
soultrane well, I actually did it. The woman I spoke with wasn't the one who left the message, and she was really apologetic. However she was the one who made the mistake last time. She said it's hard because they can't see our files ahead of time. I told her that if they don't know, instead of assuming anything, if someone calls to schedule a follow up, maybe she could just say "what are we following up?" If they are pregnant/PP, they will have no problem excitedly telling that. And if they had a loss, they won't be faced with the awkward question. It would have been sad to tell them why I needed a follow up, but not as bad as telling her that no, I never delivered. Not at all. I thought about it before I called and that seemed like the best option... She was really nice about it, and said she would pass the message on... I don't know if it will help but maybe I helped spare someone who is hurting a little extra hurt...
soultrane well, I actually did it. The woman I spoke with wasn't the one who left the message, and she was really apologetic. However she was the one who made the mistake last time. She said it's hard because they can't see our files ahead of time. I told her that if they don't know, instead of assuming anything, if someone calls to schedule a follow up, maybe she could just say "what are we following up?" If they are pregnant/PP, they will have no problem excitedly telling that. And if they had a loss, they won't be faced with the awkward question. It would have been sad to tell them why I needed a follow up, but not as bad as telling her that no, I never delivered. Not at all. I thought about it before I called and that seemed like the best option... She was really nice about it, and said she would pass the message on... I don't know if it will help but maybe I helped spare someone who is hurting a little extra hurt...
I'm glad to hear that you brought it to their attention and they seemed to take it to heart! Hopefully they review their protocol and make some changes so that they're a bit more focused on the patient's experience.
And I completely agree with you. Having to tell them why you're calling in the first place is really difficult when it's not for a happy reason, but there's a lot to be said for allowing the patient to control how the conversation goes, especially when they're in a pretty raw place emotionally. I was able to get through those conversations much easier when I was the one controlling the conversation, because I usually spent a good 10 minutes before I called giving myself a pep talk. Having to answer the unexpected question "are you pregnant?" seriously threw me for a loop and I had trouble getting through the rest of the conversation because I just wanted to scream.
My phone call with the nurse last week was pretty similar to yours. The nurse I spoke to at first defended the receptionist's question and explained that she had to ask that in order to know how to direct the call. Once I pointed out that asking every patient if they were pregnant was incredibly insensitive to those who had experienced a loss or who may be having difficulty getting pregnant, it was like she had an aha moment. I don't know if it was my phone call or not, but every time I called after that conversation, I was asked for my DOB and name, presumably so they could check my record before proceeding. Sure, it may take a little longer, but it's definitely a more customer-centric approach.
I also have to laugh a little, because now I wonder how many times they've asked an 85-year-old post-menopausal woman if she's pregnant.
I tried to volunteer with the PAIL network here today. I filled out the online form and got a call five minutes later! They won't let me volunteer right now. They say it's too soon. They prefer two years post lost, but will revisit with me in a couple of months.
They did recommend me to their phone support. So I should get an intake call in the next 24 hours. She is also emailing my nurse practitioner info about starting a support group. She is going to contact my hospital about sensitivity training as well.
It feels...... Good? I cried when I got off the phone with her, but I think this is the first step to what I need to do to grieve this time.
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