Thoughts on "Mother of the Year" in Baltimore?

[mrsdee1982]

www.buzzfeed.com/ryanhatesthis/everybodys-cringing-at-what-looks-like-video-of-a-mom-draggi#.ta9KaEmmm

What are your thoughts on what some people are calling the "Mother of the Year" in Baltimore?

For those that cannot view the video or haven't already heard, a mother recognized her teenage son as one of the rioters on TV.  She went out and found him, and dragged him away, smacking him around and screaming at him.  It was all caught on camera.  

What are your thoughts on this?  

Some people are calling her mother of the year.  Others are condemning her for her "abuse" towards her son.  

[wormgerm]

For me that's cut and dry domestic abuse. Enraged closed hand slap/weird not quite punches are not ok. That's something that should only be used as an act of self defense.

Edit to add: picture that as a dad hitting a daughter the exact same way. Does that make it admirable?

[dmoney]

While I dont agree with any sort of Abuse, I am proud of her for getting her son off the street. These Teens are now making their way up towards where my office is. All of the offices around me are closing and we are still open. Its very scary in my home town right now. Does she deserve to win Mother of the year?? No, but did she do the right thing but recagonizing her son and getting him off the street yes.

[mrsdee1982]

I do think her emotions got the best of her, but I honestly can't say what I would do myself if I caught my child out on the streets causing chaos and destruction.

I commend her for getting her child off the street, physically dragging him away if necessary, but I do think the hitting was a bit overboard.

[lalamomma]

She shouldn't have attacked him like that. I get that, but he isn't exactly a defenseless little child and he was committing a crime! He certainly felt he was big enough to throw rocks at police officers. His butt SHOULD be in jail!
I appreciate her trying to correct his behaviors and not just letting him run wild. I wouldn't use her method but at least she is trying I guess.
I hope this going viral embarrassed him like crazy!
ETA: I wouldn't be calling her mother of the year though either.

[noname83]

I agree with everyone else. I think it's extremely commendable that she recognized him and dragged him off the street. However, the hitting/slapping, whatever that was, was over the line. I wouldn't call her mother of the year, and I don't think she's the best example out there, but the underlying act was good. I hope more people/parents stop their kids from rioting/looting. Just without the hitting.

[Deleted]

I wouldn't call her MOTY, but I also am not appalled by it. Then again, I grew up in an era when parents were allowed to physically discipline their children. My dad used to spank us with a belt, sometimes made us get our own switch, and one time flat out slapped me across the face. And every last time I was seriously out of line a had it coming. I wouldn't remotely consider myself an abused child and I don't consider what I see that mom doing as child abuse either, under the circumstances.

[mrsdee1982]

Honestly, the more I think about it, the more I feel like I would have reacted a lot like this lady did if I caught my child throwing rocks and bricks at police. Probably would not have been my finest hour, but I probably wouldn't have many, if any, regrets about it either.

[baytosa2013]

Apr 28, 2015 13:47:36 GMT -5 @jimbobcooter said:

I wouldn't call her MOTY, but I also am not appalled by it. Then again, I grew up in an era when parents were allowed to physically discipline their children. My dad used to spank us with a belt, sometimes made us get our own switch, and one time flat out slapped me across the face. And every last time I was seriously out of line a had it coming. I wouldn't remotely consider myself an abused child and I don't consider what I see that mom doing as child abuse either, under the circumstances.

I completely agree with this. I hardly think she is mother of the year, but I also don't think that smacking her teenager upside the head a couple times for 1. being out on the streets during a riot and 2. being in full on "I'm about to do something really bad" gear is all that out of line.

 We also got the belt a time or two, the bar of Ivory soap and an ear pull now and again were all things that happened when we were deserving. I don't consider myself abused, I was a good kid majority of the time and I knew my parents meant business.  I honestly don't know that if I saw my child not only doing something stupid like that but also putting himself in potentially grave danger, that I wouldn't have reacted the same way in order to get him out of there.

[alayne926]

I agree with @jimbobcooter about her not being MOTY, but honestly, if there were more parents willing to jump in like that to stop their children from doing something so stupid and disrespectful, our country would not be as bad as it is. She got caught up in the moment and did what she needed to do to get her point across and get her son out of a dangerous situation. Instead of being just another spectator or participant, she got him out and maybe he'll think twice before getting caught up in the mob mentality and jump in to throw things at police officers and destroy their communtiy.

My parents never hesitated to spank us if we were out of line and they were (and still are) respected for that.

[wormgerm]

She wasn't spanking. It wasnt one slap. She was out of control angry beating her kid upside the head with breaks in between. It's commendable that she went out and retrieved her kid who was doing wrong. It is not ok to beat the kid in the head while screaming and dragging him out of there.

[tatersalad]

This has been posted on social media today by several men I went to school with. They like to point out that their mamma's wooden spoons and daddy's belts kept them from ever considering engaging in the disgusting behavior these rioters are exhibiting.
As the mother of a strong willed toddler son I am waiting to see what the future brings in way of discipline. Thus far we are keeping behavior as manageable as we can with positive parenting and time outs, but there have been a few episodes that make me wonder if threat of a physical punishment (and delivery) might become necessary. I am not sure how I feel about the current trends in public shaming as discipline. While I commend this mother for recognizing her son and pulling him out of there, many of the news stories recently on parents publicly shaming children seem barbaric to me.

[alayne926]

Apr 28, 2015 15:09:59 GMT -5 wormgerm said:

She wasn't spanking. It wasnt one slap. She was out of control angry beating her kid upside the head with breaks in between. It's commendable that she went out and retrieved her kid who was doing wrong. It is not ok to beat the kid in the head while screaming and dragging him out of there.

No one is saying it was "just spanking."

Was she out of line? Probably.  Did it need to happen? I think so.  

Think how you would feel if you were that parent and saw your child (older teenager) doing something that he could ruin his life by doing. He could get himself in trouble with the police and forever have a record that follows him and could potentially hurt him when he tries to go to college or get a job.  His actions could get him seriously hurt or killed.  She was caught up in the moment and did what she needed to do to protect her child. Wouldn't any parent do that?  You better believe if I saw my son or this LO doing something that could forever ruin any chance they had of being a successful part of society, I would jump in and do what I needed to to get them out of that situation.

[dmoney]

These teens are causing chaos in my city. My office closed at 2pm today because of threats that were received to riot the mall down the street (less then a mile) from the office. If more parents were strickt (not saying beat their children) but strict like this mother is trying to be. The teens that are encouraging those to loot and riot would be at home or in school instead of running wild.

[mrsdee1982]

Apr 28, 2015 15:24:41 GMT -5 alayne926 said:

Apr 28, 2015 15:09:59 GMT -5 wormgerm said:

She wasn't spanking. It wasnt one slap. She was out of control angry beating her kid upside the head with breaks in between. It's commendable that she went out and retrieved her kid who was doing wrong. It is not ok to beat the kid in the head while screaming and dragging him out of there.

No one is saying it was "just spanking."

Was she out of line? Probably.  Did it need to happen? I think so.  

Think how you would feel if you were that parent and saw your child (older teenager) doing something that he could ruin his life by doing. He could get himself in trouble with the police and forever have a record that follows him and could potentially hurt him when he tries to go to college or get a job.  His actions could get him seriously hurt or killed.  She was caught up in the moment and did what she needed to do to protect her child. Wouldn't any parent do that?  You better believe if I saw my son or this LO doing something that could forever ruin any chance they had of being a successful part of society, I would jump in and do what I needed to to get them out of that situation.

This pretty much sums up how I feel.  

Was she out of line with the physicality of the situation?  Yeah, probably.  
Would I react the same way to seeing my child doing something like this?  Yeah, probably. 
Would I have any regrets about it, if it saved my child from getting injured/dying/ruining his life/ruining others lives? Probably not.  

I wouldn't call her "Mother of the Year", but I don't condemn her actions either.  I try and put myself in her shoes.  She is literally walking into a riot in progress to pull her son out.  I don't think a calm "Son, you need to come with me now and stop this foolishness" would have worked.  If he's man enough to throw rocks at police with the intent of injuring them, he's man enough to get his ass beat on TV by his momma.  He's lucky it was just a momma ass beating and not a police bullet that pulled him out of that situation.  

[wormgerm]

To clarify I brought up my opinion that it wasn't spanking because several other pps mentioned they were spanked, slapped, and hit with objects. They said they didn't think their punishments were abuse. I was just pointing out that the actions shown in the clips were not equivalent to spanking or one well placed slap. She was flipping out. I didn't mean to imply she should have spanked him. Fully agree that was neither the time nor the place for punishment like that.

Uncontrolled violence doesn't teach people not to be voilent.

She did the right thing getting him under control and out of there but the means to do so weren't this awesome rah-rah go mama thing. Consensus here agrees with that.

I don't know what I would have done differently or better to get my kid out of there. I just personally think her actions were poor. Technically speaking she was in the middle of the riot beating on her kid. At that point doesn't that make her part of it?

[redlipz]

I don't think she went too far. If that were me or one of my cousins, my uncle would have dragged us by the ear or hair and whooped our ass when we got home with a belt or a leather horse whip, wouldn't even say a word to us the whole time and you bet your ass I'd know why I was getting hit and I'd sure as hell know I was in the wrong.

I'd probably drag my kid out the same way my uncle would and they'd sure have consequences when we got home. A riot is nothing small and too many get away with it.

[sully326]

Ok so I guess I'm a speshul one but I'll tell you what, if my son was out there I'd be the first one to smack him upside the head once or twice while screaming, "WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU!?! YOU HAVE MORE SENSE & I TAUGHT YOU BETTER!! GET YOUR ASS HOME!!"...

I'm from the south, nothing she did shocks me & honestly, I laughed when I saw the video. That being said, I don't spank my son, but I have in the past, it doesn't work for him. Time out works better. I'm not a "violent" mom but I honestly don't see anything wrong with what she did. If she treated him like this on the regular over small or simple things, yeah, that wouldn't be ok but given the situation I don't think she went overboard.

[alayne926]

Apr 28, 2015 16:16:28 GMT -5 wormgerm said:

To clarify I brought up my opinion that it wasn't spanking because several other pps mentioned they were spanked, slapped, and hit with objects. They said they didn't think their punishments were abuse. I was just pointing out that the actions shown in the clips were not equivalent to spanking or one well placed slap. She was flipping out. I didn't mean to imply she should have spanked him. Fully agree that was neither the time nor the place for punishment like that.

Uncontrolled violence doesn't teach people not to be voilent.

She did the right thing getting him under control and out of there but the means to do so weren't this awesome rah-rah go mama thing. Consensus here agrees with that.

I don't know what I would have done differently or better to get my kid out of there. I just personally think her actions were poor. Technically speaking she was in the middle of the riot beating on her kid. At that point doesn't that make her part of it?

No, she was not part of the crowd throwing things at police or getting ready to destroy property to make a point. She recognized her son getting ready to get involved and got him out. 

[mrsdee1982]

@jemomma, yes, she deserves applause.

[sully326]

@jemomma Absolutely!

[hannahl201477]

I don't know that it's Mother of the year worth... But I applaud her for going and getting her son. And I think I would act the same way if I were in her shoes. Her emotions were probably going crazy! My parents would do the same thing to myself or my brother if we were out acting that way. And we were very loved. Way to go mama!!

[Deleted]

Trust me when I say the one time slap my dad gave me was much harder than what that kid got. Still not abuse. It was well deserved discipline. I was 13-14Ish and I sure as hell never mouthed off to him again the way I was doing when it happened. Nor dId I grow up to be a vIolent person. Teenagers are assholes and the kid in the video was engaged in some pretty severe bullshit. I'm not losing sleep at all over his mom reacting that way, even if she was losing it in that moment.

[lalamomma]

Apr 28, 2015 16:16:28 GMT -5 wormgerm said:

To clarify I brought up my opinion that it wasn't spanking because several other pps mentioned they were spanked, slapped, and hit with objects. They said they didn't think their punishments were abuse. I was just pointing out that the actions shown in the clips were not equivalent to spanking or one well placed slap. She was flipping out. I didn't mean to imply she should have spanked him. Fully agree that was neither the time nor the place for punishment like that.

Uncontrolled violence doesn't teach people not to be voilent.

She did the right thing getting him under control and out of there but the means to do so weren't this awesome rah-rah go mama thing. Consensus here agrees with that.

I don't know what I would have done differently or better to get my kid out of there. I just personally think her actions were poor. Technically speaking she was in the middle of the riot beating on her kid. At that point doesn't that make her part of it?

No I don't think it makes her part of rioting and looting. I think it makes her a concerned mother who wants her son in a safer environment.
Frankly like a PP said I doubt a calm please would have done it. Sure there is middle ground but we don't know the background either. Maybe she had told him not to come. Maybe she called and told him to get his butt home.... Who knows. But I don't think her smacking him in the head is anywhere near being part of the riots and looting.

[lalamomma]

Apr 28, 2015 16:52:46 GMT -5 @jemomma said:

Now this child's mother deserves Mother of the Year. Clearly she is doing something right.

Definitely more of this would make things much better. Good for his parents for teaching him better!

[turtletyme]

I think the embarrassment of getting his ass beat in public when he thinks he's tough will be a long-lasting lesson. She succeeded in getting him off the street. I know it's "abuse" nowadays but IMO this was part of how we learned to respect our parents. It definitely wasn't a regular thing, but the few hits I did get, I learned from.

[missjenniebean]

Considering it is a disrespectful and unnecessary riot, I would have lost my cool too. MOTY? No. But she marched her butt in there are got him out of there. I agree with many PP that I probably might have had a similar reaction. She herself could have been hurt, but I do not see her actions contributing to the riot. If I even caught my brothers out there you better believe I would be running toward them fuming, and they would probably run too.

[erbear]

I wish more mothers were out there getting their kids out of the streets/riots so I have zero problems with this.

[tahitiandreamin]

Maybe the way she did it was a bit harsh but what she did was great. I think that more parents need to let their kids know that behaviour like this is not ok.

[noeliav]

I think this article helps explain my feelings on her reaction to finding her son among the riots.
www.salon.com/2015/04/29/the_hideous_white_hypocrisy_behind_the_baltimore_%E2%80%9Chero_mom%E2%80%9D_hype_how_clueless_media_applause_excuses_police_brutality/

I saw a woman who was terrified to find her son participating in such a dangerous activity, and acted out because of that fear.