CP: daycare biting

[carli]

Crossposted in Working Parents....

DD is frequently coming home from daycare with bite marks on her arms. The class she is in is 18-24 months. For a while I just figured it was the age group. DD herself will occasionally try to bite when she's frustrated.

There was one week she ended the week with 3 different marks on one arm. And it seems like they frequently tell me they didn't see it happen and she must not have cried b/c they noticed it later. I'm just wondering if this is normal for the age group, or is it excessive? To me it seems excessive. I feel like if there is 2-3 regular biters in the room of 15 kids, they should be able to keep a better eye on them. My poor DD is constantly bruised!

I would say easily that she is bit once/week. Tonight she had a bite mark on her arm that they did not mention and I didn't notice until we got her home. I am thinking they aren't even aware that it happened. I have a hard time believing she takes these nasty looking bites without a peep.

[carli]

I plan on talking to the director tomorrow. Sometimes they have an incident report and sometimes they don't. I don't know if its the same child every time or if she is provoking them. I will ask those questions tomorrow. Thank you for the suggestions.

[junewife]

I mean, stuff happens, but this definitely seems excessive to me.

DS has never come home with bite marks but has come home with scratches from other kids twice (and a bruise from being hit by a toy once). The director always talks to me about it and has me sign an incident report. I feel that it's taken fairly seriously.

[Unknown]

Glad you are talking to the director. My DD got bit yesterday, but they even called me at work to let me know and leave an injury slip on her daily report sheet whenever she gets bit. I know there is one notorious biter in DD's class that they try and keep an extra eye on.

Any updates?

[zoly1103]

That seems excessive in that age group. We had a lot of problems in my son's previous room where they were all about 12-18 months but I'm told there are not as many issues in the room he just moved to, which is 18+ months. I would assume that the older they get and the more they can express what they are trying to say, that the biting should not happen as often.

[RedDDD]

I have a coworker whose daughter was getting bit several times a week. It was usually the same offender but one of the things that the DC director told her which I thought might be helpful to you as far as understanding it is....she said that her daughter made a very large reaction when she got bit. Obviously most kids are going to cry or get mad when being bit but I guess her daughter really got dramatic and the director thought this was partly the cause. This doesn't really help you in anyway to stop it but if she is the kid that keeps getting bit and she produces the reaction the offender wants it may be why it keeps happening. As for my coworker they just watched the kids really closely and made every attempt to keep it from happening but in the end they just grow out of the biting phase. sucks

[carli]

I only spoke to the director briefly this morning b/c we had a family emergency that threw my whole morning off. She was not aware that it was happening as often as it was and said she would definitely look into it and try to get more info on if it's a repeat offendor and if DD is doing anything to provoke it.

They do have me sign incident reports and will call me when they know about it. Yesterday's bite, I think they were completely unaware of so I didn't get any sort of notification and I brought that up to the director as well. They keep telling me DD doesn't cry so they don't catch the child in the act. But like jnetx said, that just seems bizarre to me.

[RedDDD]

they just need to keep a closer eye on it for a while and then stop it before it happens. If they determine its a repeat offender then they should just separate them as best as they can even if it is temporary cuz they usually just stop doing it. GL!

[redfraggle]

As a former teacher, I can tell you that it is impossible to keep an eye on every kid all the time, no matter the age. But I agree with others that so much biting seems excessive. Keep a record of your own, starting now if you don't have records from the beginning. The DCPs should be observant enough to be reporting bite marks on exposed skin, even if they don't see your kid being bitten.

[carli]

So...Now I'm told Katie mae is a frequent biter. Talk about mommy frustration. I'm extremely frustrated with daycare b/c I haven't been told in a while that she had bitten anyone. Then the assistant direct yesterday told me she had bit someone very hard and their parents pulled him from Daycare b/c of it.

It's obviously an ongoing problem in the room and I'm mostly annoyed that it's not being communicated like it should. Also, that they ahve let it get so out of control that they are losing families over it. Honestly, DH and I are considering moving schools too. I sent a lengthy email expressing my concerns and frustration and asking for documentation of all incidents.

I will get answers and I will find a solution! I'm just so aggrevated!