Selective mutism

[lkamenko]

Veronica does not speak at school. She is very talkative at home and very smart too, lately she talks a lot at home. But at school she shuts down.

Apparently it has been going on for a while, we (teachers and me) were hoping it is just a stage, since she is shy in general and was a little delayed with speech. But it is becoming pretty obvious - she just does not say a word while at school! At home she speaks mostly English, sings songs, ABC, numbers all that stuff that mostly she learned at school...  She loves her teachers and friends at school and does not seem to be anxious when at school, just does not talk

I am so upset about it. I started to google the problem and this is what I found - selective mutism - this fits her behavior to the dot.

I know there are some speech therapists, cognitive specialists, teachers and others here who can help me to determine what are my next steps on this and just give me a desperately needed support in this matter. I am in tears...

[bliz1712]

oh lkamenko, I'm so sorry you're dealing with this. I know we have a great bunch of ladies on here that can offer you some helpful advice. I just want to offer my hugs and support.

[julymommy]

I wish i knew more to help you. Hopefully someone can shed some light. Sorry you are going through this.

[cookiesandwine]

I'd probably ask at her school, or else call your local public school, for an evaluation. She may be able to get speech therapy services through the school district.

[gk12]

Speech pathologist to the rescue!
First some questions
1. Is it a local preschool or private center?
2. Does she speak to anyone at the school?
- does she speak to you in the school (if so are others around/what does the situation look like?)
- any peers that she talks to and again what's that like (is the teacher close by vs far away)
3. At home is she speaking in sentences?
4. When out and about in public does she speak to you and family? How does she handle a stranger saying Hi?
5. Does she demonstrate anxiety?
6. Do others frequently speak for her?

So as far an evaluation goes those are some of the questions they would ask you. The first part of the eval would be questionnaires, then language tests if she'll participate and they might have you record her speaking at home.

Depending on what the evaluator thinks they may mention counseling or a psychologist.

If the school does not want to do an evaluation ask your pediatrician for a referral.

Feel free to ask me more questions and I hope this was helpful! I'll look back for your answers if you're ok sharing that info.
Also check out
ASHA.org/public/speech/disorders/SelectiveMutism/

[lkamenko]

Thank you, gk12 for the info.

[lkamenko]

I will write the answers later tonight.

[trixi282]

I hope you can get some help from gk12 - how awesome that we have such a diverse group of women to help us out!

No advice from me, but I hope you can get some answers and get her some help so she will talk outside of home. Sounds like GK has a start for you and you can look into some local resources too. Good luck.

[xanthepants]

lkamenko, I don't think Cosette is quite as shy as I know she has begun to talk in school but it took a long long time for her to get comfortable. We still struggle with lots of situations where she won't talk at all and she just shuts down. Other times she forgets where she is at and she will ramble until she notice someone watching her. We definitely struggle with adults/strangers or even semi fa liar adults talking to her, she often will not answer. And she is smart and incredibly chatty at home. She will very very rarely if ever talk to men. I guess my point is that I wanted to let you know I understand your concern and sadness. It sometimes gets me down. I haven't sought out any testing yet because we have finally made some breakthrus recently at school with a couple of teachers. I hope you find some answers and some plans to help. Sounds like gk12, may have some great info!

[lkamenko]

V goes to a nice preschool that is part if church. Unfortunately they are closing and she will start a new school next month. I know this change can only add to the anxiety but we don't have a choice.
I thought she spoke to her peers but teachers say they never heard her.
At home she speaks in short sentences, not very clear, but we understand.
When we are out in public she would speak to us but completely shuts down when a stranger tries to talk to her. She Hides behind me and would not say a sound.
She has tantrums from time to time but I don't see any other symptoms of anxiety.

I recorded her chatting tonight at home for the teachers, she talked about playing at school with her friend and swimming in a pool...
ThAnk you very much for your help, I really appreciate it.

[justbeth]

If you think selective mutism is the issue I would recommend scheduling an appointment with an SLP. If further intervention is necessary, the SLP can put you in contact with whomever they feel you need on your team. They are probably the best starting point.

I've worked with a few children with selective mutism during my time as a counselor. gk12 had a great list of questions! Often times children with selective mutism work with a team- SLP, mental health therapist, teachers, and parents- to see the best results. Small steps are usually best and you may practice communications at home until she becomes comfortable with trying them with the therapist, then move to trying them alone with the teachers, then eventually with the class being present. Sometimes it can be as small as nodding yes or no or pointing to an item, but all steps are usually rewarded, no matter how small. Selective mutism is typically considered a symptom in the mental health world, not a diagnosis, and a therapist will help to figure out what the root issue is, most commonly anxiety.

If you end up looking for a therapist try to find someone trained in working with small children. A registered play therapist would be my personal preference.

Let me know if you have any more questions and I will help if I can!

[gk12]

lkamenko Based on your concerns and the answers to my questions I think asking for a speech language evaluation is a good idea. Let me clear that I'm not saying I think it's selective mutism; there are many speech/language disorders that could present with that list of symptoms.

Since you're going to be switching schools I'd start by asking teachers to write a little summary of their concerns and bring it to your pediatrician. You can call the pediatrician to be sure but they should be able to refer you for a speech language eval. If you go on asha.org there's a spot search for a provider. You can type in your state and city. I can help you find an SLP if you want.

Another ?- does she talk to the pediatrician or to you in front of the pedi?

Let me know what else I can do. Just try to breathe and remember early intervention (identification & treatment at a young age) has much better outcomes so you're doing the right thing by looking into it.

I have worked with one child with selective mutism and a co-worker is currently working with one so I can always ask my co-worker questions too.

[jennmm]

I would definitely talk to her new school about it. The DC my son went to for Pre-K had a speech therapist that they brought in to evaluate any kids they/parents were concerned about. My son had speech delays so they evaluated him and gave us quite a detailed report and at no cost.

[sarahandeddie]

I don't have any suggestions. However, I've worked in a classroom that had a child with selective mutism. She never spoke a word during preschool but did start talking in kindergarten. I know she received speech time in school. Anyway, my point to sharing this is just to let you know that there can be a positive outcome. She will start talking more. I think it's wonderful that you're taking action now. As others have said, early intervention is key.