+"+" WEEKLY CHECK IN 5/19/15 "+"+

[icequeen]

Good morning, y'all!

I hope y'all have some positive updates and are having a good week so far. Let's all support and encourage each other, as always! Please PM me if you would like to be tagged as a reminder for participation. Have a nice day and I'm looking forward to hearing from y'all!

flcl, mrsb1008, yoshijo28, @rocknrollfriend, @wallflwr926, @ordinaryamy, runnergirl812, helloamanda, @giamia923, snarkysparklefart, @alleykat05, bluerainfire, sko14, @erin2021, spencer1337, RedDDD

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Please state your diagnosis and/or status:

How is your week going?

Any struggles or accomplishments you would like to share?

Any changes in medication or recent appointments?

GTKY: How did you and your SO meet?

[Deleted]

Please state your diagnosis and/or status:GAD
How is your week going?Pretty awful. I think my pregnancy hormones are kicking my ass. Sunday I sat and cried on the shower floor for about an hour. I feel like all I do is yell at my kids lately, they are so defiant right now, and it's like pulling teeth trying to get any help from my parents.
Any struggles or accomplishments you would like to share?I'm really struggling to keep my shit together. My husband comes home from Alberta today, but we have so much going on, I feel like I won't get to see him or get any rest. I just cannot stop crying this week.
Any changes in medication or recent appointments?None
GTKY: How did you and your SO meet?We met volunteering at a Bingo 11 years ago! We were filling in for friends who couldn't be there, an we were raising money for our track and field teams. He was at the University, I was still in high school so our paths never crossed until we met at the Bingo. He asked me out the day after we met and we have been together ever since!

[runnergirl812]

I may end up doing two of these this week. I like the check-ins.


Please state your diagnosis and/or status: GAD

How is your week going? So far so good. Boss is in PR for the week, so I don't feel micromanaged or under her radar.

Any struggles or accomplishments you would like to share? I am working on clearing some substantial cc debt. Finances are one of my major stressors. I worry about them constantly, so it's a goal to clear my CC debt so that I don't worry about it so much, in case of job loss, etc. So I finally stepped out and applied for a 0% interest balance transfer card to transfer some debt from a high interest card. Was really worried I wouldn't get approved, even knowing my FICO score, but I GOT APPROVED THIS MORNING!!!! This will really help me out to clear debt faster.

Also, I'm in the waiting period for a job offer. The recruiter/headhunter says "any day now" and keeps updating me daily with anything he gets via email. We had a discussion yesterday about potential start dates. So I feel like I'm getting an offer - just don't know what it is or how good an offer it will be. But one is coming and that has me excited. Technically I would be taking a step back career-wise, but it's to go back to doing what I love more, and think it's for the best. The job would still be stressful, but a different kind of stress. My anxiety has really hit my job performance hard, and I'm in recovery mode at work. I think a few more months in my current position, I could fully recover what I've lost in time and confidence, but it's a daily fight for me to focus and go to work each day. I have to do deep breathing just to get out of the car some days.

Any changes in medication or recent appointments? I have a psychiatry appt this afternoon.

GTKY: How did you and your SO meet? We "met" online via Plenty of Fish - a dating website. I got on as a joke, just to look at profiles. I had been on Match.com and other sites which were an EPIC EPIC failure. But 2 days after signing up, my now BF liked my photo and I ended up sending him a "Hi." We officially met about 2 weeks later in a Panera Bread. It went from there... :-)

[RedDDD]

Please state your diagnosis and/or status: Depression with anxiety

How is your week going? I had a amazing weekend with the kids but I was exhausted Sunday and my youngest is getting her canine teeth which = her waking up like every two hours. DH said he would let me go to bed early tonight and take the kids so Im hoping for a good night sleep tonight. Really looking forward to the long weekend.

But we have had a tough week. Last week a very good friend of ours 18 yr old kid attempted suicide by overdosing on his antidepressants. He was in a coma for three says and then woke up. We are waiting to hear the prognosis but DH was very upset by the news. We also have a good friend that went in for a biopsy yesterday and so far we haven't heard but we are hoping it is not cancer. AND then my best friends cousin died of cancer Sunday after a horrible battle leaving behind two girls and her DH. Its been awful BUT I have really been appreciating everything I have. And when my kids act up and I feel like Im going to lose my shit I remember that we are all healthy and we have each other so I have been a lot more patient.

Any struggles or accomplishments you would like to share? Still really working on losing a few lbs. Im still carrying around 10 lbs of baby weight and DD is almost 2 so that is ridiculous and frustrating. Just really watching what I eat.

Any changes in medication or recent appointments? I changed when I take my meds and I take them in the morning now. Going to watch how it goes for a few days and see if it helps with the sleep issues I have been having. I have a follow up apt with my DR next week.

GTKY: How did you and your SO meet? I went to a party at a bar/restaurant for a friend and DH's parents where there. His dad spotted me and asked someone at the party if they knew me cuz he wanted to set me up with his son. I was called over and chatted with them for a little while and ended up giving him my number (what the hell right?!) DH called me two weeks later after his dad harassing him to call me and we met on a blind date at the same bar where I met his dad. We have been inseparable since.

[RedDDD]

@erin2021,I know you will hear this a ton but go easy on yourself. Pregnancy is no joke and it totally screws with you. totally normal. Hang in there

[bluerainfire]

Please state your diagnosis and/or status: ptsd, anxiety, salt and pepper depression

How is your week going? no real complaints

Any struggles or accomplishments you would like to share? fear of dying, and or having cancer- my dh was diagnosed with testicular cancer in 2010- after watching it all- even though dh is "cured" or the last stages of remission before they call it truly cured.. I freak out its going to be me- I am a cyst on my leg- that I am terrified of-I don't know, fear of death is a big one for me, and I felt anxious lately-

body weight- I am not fat, nor thin. I am in the middle and would like to lose the baby stomach or a portion of it, I use to be very skinny but that wasn't healthy either-

Any changes in medication or recent appointments? just need to go for some check ups

GTKY: How did you and your SO meet? at work at 2004, he was my coworker, at one time I was his supervior hahaha

[Deleted]

Please state your diagnosis and/or status:
Depression, Anxiety, Paranoia

How is your week going?
Okay. I sliced the tip of my pinky finger peeling a sweet potato on Monday which put a dent in my cleaning plans... and my feelings of competence. 

Any struggles or accomplishments you would like to share?
Struggling to implement a schedule like icequeen suggested last week. I guess the fact that I can whatever I want makes it hard to follow. 
I'm having a hard time dealing with my job situation. There was the perfect job and I didn't get it, but I still live on the same street as the school and we drive by it sometimes and seeing it kind of makes me want to cry. H & I have been sorting out our finances and it just emphasizes how dependent I am on him financially. At the bank the consultant outright said "He's pre-approved and you'd have to apply. And with your work situation..." Sure, we still got a really good account and credit card for 'free', but I know it's in spite of me. 

Any changes in medication or recent appointments?
H put in the form to add me to his insurance so I can probably book one as soon as that goes through.

GTKY: How did you and your SO meet?
University residence. We lived on the same floor and my roommates were super social and forced me (basically hermit) to meet other people. H became part of our core group of friends, and ultimately my only close friend at school. 

Fun story: A stupid game call 'Marry, Date, F***' jump started our relationship. Four of our guy friends and my roommate were playing it, and the guys chose me to marry whenever I came up (she was pretty upset since she was not once chosen to marry). When I asked H about it, he said it was actually eye-opening for him because he realized he would choose me over his then GF to theoretically marry.

[snarkysparklefart]

@erin2021, I'm with Reddd, pregnancy is tough, I hope you can have some down time with your H. I also feel like I can relate to the getting help = pulling teeth with my older DD.
runnergirl812, fingers still crossed for the job offer!!
RedDDD, many hugs going out to your family and the family affected.

As for me:
Please state your diagnosis and/or status: borderline PD. Also dealing with PPD/A right now.

How is your week going? Some ups some downs.

Any struggles or accomplishments you would like to share? my H and I had a very serious and necessary conversation about the state of our marriage. Although it was really, really hard and uncomfortable, it was necessary. Now I hope we can just keep moving forward. I am so lucky, to have such a wonderful husband, and I need to treat him as such. Still struggling with DD1 behaviors and jealousy- I'm really down about it.

Any changes in medication or recent appointments? just got home from therapy, which was good. I also started Paxil this week, in addition to my as needed anxiety medication.

GTKY: How did you and your SO meet? We also met online through plenty of fish. I like to joke that I found him, and only after I expanded my acceptable age range (he's only 5 years older than me, but we enjoy joking about him being old and me being a youngster). We met in public first, it rained on our first date (a walk around the city) and he ripped his pants. We married a year later to the day!

[icequeen]

@erin2021, I think both you and I are very similar. I am so sorry you are feeling so pressured and depressed about this pregnancy when it's supposed to be such a joyful time, and you've been working your ass off to get to this point. All I can say is try to remember that your boys are happy, healthy kids and you are a strong mom for working ad keeping the house together. It's a big testament to your versatility and everyone is allowed to have breakdowns once in a while. Pregnancy is not always a piece of cake and I know you know that.
runnergirl812, I'm glad you have some relief with your boss being gone. I hope you can play catch up and just know in the back of your mind you'll be out of there soon. I'm so hopeful for your new job prospects.
RedDDD, how terrible. I am so sorry you are going through such losses. It is a great reminder to cherish the moments we do have on Earth and with our families. I will be praying for you and your family.
bluerainfire, I am sorry you are feeling so anxious about potentially becoming sick due to your husband's condition. Remember that you are doing everything you can to stay healthy so you are not in that situation and just be vigilant about your doing your part to stay well, since no one can predict the future. I can relate to your body image issues so much, and you can always start with some small goals like a quick workout during the day or making some small tweaks to your diet.
@ordinaryamy, I hate that you feel so dependent on YH and that you think the financial situation is your fault. I don't think that is totally the case, because you are actively trying to pursue other jobs and it's not your fault the job market sucks. Maybe one you get your house in order (keep plugging away at your schedule and make sure you have small tasks that you know you can accomplish and maybe set some goals in our weekly thread or ask YH to keep you accountable) you will be able to get a temporary job until you find a better permanent position.
snarkysparklefart, great job with having the heart to heart with YH. It's so hard to face these issues because you always want things to be as perfect as possible and it's hard to admit that hard issues. I'm glad you are communicating well and he was receptive.

I will update tomorrow since I have an ultrasound and therapy appointment so I wanted to include that.

[flcl]

Hi all... I'm sorry I've been MIA. I hope I can hope back in and check in with everyone...

Please state your diagnosis and/or status:
Depression, anxiety, panic attacks

How is your week going?
Busy, I'm glad tomorrow's Friday followed by a long weekend.  I haven't been feeling the greatest which unfortunately means that I have little patience dealing with crap.  I feel bad for H that I'm just so grumpy and irritable all the time.

Any struggles or accomplishments you would like to share?
I guess work falls under both right now...there have been a ton of stressful issues that I've been dealing with which is a struggle. The accomplishment is that I've been dealing with the issues... albeit not always with the most grace. But I've been getting out of bed and showing up which feels huge right now.

Any changes in medication or recent appointments?
No, status quo

GTKY: How did you and your SO meet?
We met through mutual friends and became friends ourselves... I was in another relationship at that time. When that didn't work out, H made a bet with me. He lost and I won a free dinner... We were married within a year!

[flcl]

icequeen, congratulations!!!

[Deleted]

Please state your diagnosis and/or status: GAD, Bipolar Disorder, ADD, Narcolepsy.

How is your week going? Well, Queenie got KU so that is super exciting news. It made my entire month.

Any struggles or accomplishments you would like to share? I've been a little MIA. Healthwise was crappy. Mentally much better. Although, just remembered I forgot to call in my script so FX i'm good through the weekend.

Any changes in medication or recent appointments? All my psych stuff is stable. I've been more focused on TTCing. We are starting IF testing.

GTKY: How did you and your SO meet? He was the bartender at a beer bar near my friend's house. My friend claims that when MH and I met it was love at first sight. As silly as it sounds, i've never argued her.
He met us at another bar when his shift ended and I ended up going home with him that night (I was kind of drunk, he was a total gentleman). We've pretty much been inseperable since.
I met him June 2010, we moved in together October 2010, got engaged May 2011, got married November 2011. He drives me nuts, but I wouldn't trade him for anything.

Edit: I meant wouldn't, freudian slip?

[packmomma]

Hey guys I think I posted here a long time ago but have since just been on my bmb. Can I go here too?

Please state your diagnosis and/or status: bipolar, cfs, and some lingering ptsd

How is your week going?I've been struggling with insomnia this eeek which has made me feel really jittery (not manic just anxious).

Any struggles or accomplishments you would like to share? I started deep cleaning the bathrooms this week in little spurts so it's taken me days but it's a big deal for me.

Any changes in medication or recent appointments? Nope

GTKY: How did you and your SO meet?
We met through friends that were trying to set us up. We moved in 3 months later. 9 years later we've never looked back.

[Deleted]

@erin2021: It sounds like you're doing the best you can in a tough situation.  I hope the rest of your week turned out better and you got some 'break time' with your H. 

runnergirl812:  Congratulations! Sounds like you're making major progress in your debt. Hope the job situation gets figured out ASAP.

RedDDD: Your week reminds me of some of the hardest times I had in high school, it felt like people were dying all around me. Thoughts and prayers are with you and everyone involved.

bluerainfire: I sympathize with your fear of cancer. It's a scary prognosis, and I know it's terrifying to watch someone you love go through treatment. Like icequeen said, you are doing everything you can to be healthy. 

snarkysparklefart: Talking about things that makes us uncomfortable is extremely hard, and I applaud you for pushing forward. Hopeful having the one nerve-wrecking conversation will pave the way for a pave of more open communication on difficult things.

flcl: Welcome back! (Even if you weren't technically away ). Sometimes getting up and showing up is a huge deal. You should be proud of yourself for handling the issues as well as you could. We're always hardest on ourselves, thinking we could have done things better.

@wallflwr926: Since I was MIA, I didn't realize how many others were too. Guess we all decided to make a come back together.
Good luck with your IF testing!

packmomma: I HATE cleaning our washroom. Deep cleaning sounds not at all fun and I completely understand why it's taking so long. Each time I attempt to clean our washroom I end up surrendering and wondering "How is it STILL not clean??"
Also - all are welcome!

[icequeen]

Hi y'all!

flcl, thank you, honey. That's really sweet of you. I think it's great that you are still managing the difficult work issues, no matter what approach you take. You can't be all hunky dory all the time, and I'm sure you are doing your best.
@wallflwr926, you are making me cry! ILY! I want you to be KU so badly too, and I am praying that this IF testing works out in your favor. It will be so worth it to get answers and some proper direction.
packmomma, great job with the bathroom! I know what you mean about it being overwhelming. I have the same fears. I have been putting it off for a few weeks, and it makes it worse with a toddler running around while I'm trying to clean and have open chemicals everywhere.

Please state your diagnosis and/or status: anorexia nervosa, bulimia nervosa, GAD. And as of this week, PPD and dissociative disorder.

How is your week going? Pretty badly. I was put on bed rest for a fluid sac behind the baby. It is freaking me out terribly, because it could cause a M/C and that would totally destroy me. I am also fighting with DH because he is having a very hard time understanding the motivation and temptations of my EDs, and he is becoming very controlling as a result. I have my mom here for the weekend so it's nice that she can help around the house since I can't do much. I am also not working out which is heightening my anxiety, but I know I have to do what I have to do for the baby to be healthy. Since I have all these triggers, it's been hard for me not to binge and purge, and the shame I feel about that is driving my shame and guilt and therefore making my anxiety worse, so it's a never ending cycle. I feel more out of control of my emotions because I am off meds.

Any struggles or accomplishments you would like to share? I am struggling with binging and purging, but able to keep from working out excessively. I'm not weighing myself and fighting the impulse to lose more weight.

Any changes in medication or recent appointments? I am off all my meds for the course of the pregnancy.

GTKY: How did you and your SO meet? We met on match.com. I was in grad school and had NO time to meet people so I thought this was the "easy" way. My sister offered me her membership because she was taking a break, at the same time that MH was about to cancel his. Then he got an email from me, and we hit if off from night one.