Or at least climb down off your high horse and stop pretending you're above all this.
I'm not going anywhere. I will back down on this thread and this conversation because it really isn't going anywhere. I'm not on a high horse, I just want people to be nice to each other. That's all I want.
The world doesn't work that way. Welcome to life, it's not always nice.
Number One: Born 06.16.2009 BFP: 01.17.2014 / MC 02.05.2014 BFP: 03.08.2014 / MMC: 05.07.2014 Dx: Partial Molar/GTD. Benched until 01.2015 Number Two: Born 07.22.2016
There are appropriate ways to keep participating in the board. This was not one of them. Regardless if it was ill-intentioned, it was tactless. A call-out was warranted.
I am sorry bunnyfungo, and I agree that I should have been called out. If there is anything else I should do to resolve this, I am willing to do it. But FWIW, I believe I am too tactless and impulsive to keep posting here so I will stick to the BMB and message with the other ladies personally. I feel terrible about my mistake and I would love to interact with y'all again together on a board, but I honestly don't know how I would handle it (or the other ladies I hurt, for that matter) if something like this happened again. As you know, the women here are very important to me and I would hate to do anything to hurt them again. I just feel sorry that you have to deal with me on Jan '16. For the thousandth time, I am sorry. It doesn't take my actions away but I may as well say it again in the hopes that y'all will believe me.
I think you're missing the point. This isn't about demonizing you, it's about calling out a specific kind of behavior, or posting pattern. There's no reason to take it to extremes and say that you're sorry that we have to deal with you. Just recognize what you're doing, how it comes across, and don't do it again. The end.
I'm too drunk for hand holding. It was a shitty thing to say. It's been called out. Everything could have been done & over with, but shockingly, people who "don't want drama" always seem to be the kind of people that cause it.
I'm too drunk for hand holding. It was a shitty thing to say. It's been called out. Everything could have been done & over with, but shockingly, people who "don't want drama" always seem to be the kind of people that cause it.
FFS, I can't with this shit.
I'm not drunk enough.
Come get drunk with me. I haz a big ass bottle of vino.
I do not think you are being a bitch. I completely 100% support the way you feel. I just want this board to be drama-less. If there is going to be drama, then I am going to remove myself. I don't come here to fight with people. I come here to support you all and meet people and chat with my friends.
Newsflash - Not everyone here are BFF's. There has always, and likely will always, be drama. Just because we moved over from TD doesn't mean we all braid each others hair and play Girl Talk every night.
No one is saying there needs to be censorship and a constant pissing contest over who is struggling more but common courtesy should be a thing.
FWIW, icequeen and I are pretty good friends and all was hashed out in private and is good but just because resolution was easy for me doesn't mean that it is/should be the case with everyone.
Newsflash - Not everyone here are BFF's. There has always, and likely will always, be drama. Just because we moved over from TD doesn't mean we all braid each others hair and play Girl Talk every night.
No one is saying there needs to be censorship and a constant pissing contest over who is struggling more but common courtesy should be a thing.
FWIW, icequeen and I are pretty good friends and all was hashed out in private and is good but just because resolution was easy for me doesn't mean that it is/should be the case with everyone.
BUT I WANT A CROWN BRAID!!!!!
Come drink with helloerrbody and I. I can't promise that your braid will be a crown but you'll be too drunk to care.
@led and @sluttybigb00bz, I feel like I still need to address you ladies a bit more because we have also interacted on different boards that have gone much deeper about personal struggles that affect how we treat ourselves and others. While I have only empathy and pain in my heart for both of you, I would just ask that you be a little gentler in your responses to me. I don't think I have ever been as harsh to anyone as you are being to me right now and it really hurts. I am trying to be careful about not divulging personal details here, but both of you know about my mental illnesses and I know about yours, and I know you would be hurt and triggered if you were treated like I am right now. I am not trying to victimize myself here, because I am the one who made the mistake, but I guess the reason why I am so crushed and feel the need to tell you this is because I thought you would be understanding of my reactions to triggering events like these.
@sluttybigb00bz, I care for you a lot and have followed your IF and mental struggles. What helloerrbody said about not everyone understanding each other's IF journey is absolutely true, I still did my best to give you all of my support and encouragement that I could. So to see this kind of reaction from you in this thread is really hard for me. When people I truly care for turn on me, I have a very hard time dealing with my emotions appropriately and this is why I have more "blow ups" than others. I cannot just let things roll off my back. I am sorry for everything I have said that hurt you and I will still be praying for you to finally get the pregnancy you deserve so much.
@led, in a similar way, you and I have talked about ED's and how they have hurt our lives and relationships. You have shown such bravery and strength and I truly see you as a role model for this reason, because you were able to recover. It is a huge demon for me and often is the result of "blow ups" like these. I respect you and wish I could be as resilient as you, and I was initially going to PM you about this exact topic after you called me out for being a drama queen for my reaction to the "you shouldn't be a mother" comment. I felt like things between us had cooled down since you were not participating on the board much, but since you came back specifically to this thread to call me out again, I can't help but tell you now how I feel. I thought that you of all people would see why I would react like I did, because you are also no stranger to mental illness and it's effects. I remember you posting that you would always be there for me if I needed to talk about ED's and that you understood what I was going through. It really hurts to have you come back and call me out for "blowing up" when you know exactly why this could happen to someone like me you know how I feel. I am sorry to you too, for everything you are struggling with, but I cannot sit back again and let you talk badly about me after I held you to such high regard. And I still do.
bunnyfungo, I know you posted a response to me too but I was in the middle of typing and couldn't go back to your post. I will do better at recognizing what is and is not appropriate and be more careful regarding my beahvior. This is all very hard for me to process and I will do what I can to be a better community member, even if that means ceasing my posts for a while, just to avoid causing a problem, since that seems to be a trend. Thank you for allowing me to continue posting, and I'm sorry for dragging you into this. I hope you are feeling well.
@led and @sluttybigb00bz, I feel like I still need to address you ladies a bit more because we have also interacted on different boards that have gone much deeper about personal struggles that affect how we treat ourselves and others. While I have only empathy and pain in my heart for both of you, I would just ask that you be a little gentler in your responses to me. I don't think I have ever been as harsh to anyone as you are being to me right now and it really hurts. I am trying to be careful about not divulging personal details here, but both of you know about my mental illnesses and I know about yours, and I know you would be hurt and triggered if you were treated like I am right now. I am not trying to victimize myself here, because I am the one who made the mistake, but I guess the reason why I am so crushed and feel the need to tell you this is because I thought you would be understanding of my reactions to triggering events like these.
@sluttybigb00bz, I care for you a lot and have followed your IF and mental struggles. What helloerrbody said about not everyone understanding each other's IF journey is absolutely true, I still did my best to give you all of my support and encouragement that I could. So to see this kind of reaction from you in this thread is really hard for me. When people I truly care for turn on me, I have a very hard time dealing with my emotions appropriately and this is why I have more "blow ups" than others. I cannot just let things roll off my back. I am sorry for everything I have said that hurt you and I will still be praying for you to finally get the pregnancy you deserve so much.
@led, in a similar way, you and I have talked about ED's and how they have hurt our lives and relationships. You have shown such bravery and strength and I truly see you as a role model for this reason, because you were able to recover. It is a huge demon for me and often is the result of "blow ups" like these. I respect you and wish I could be as resilient as you, and I was initially going to PM you about this exact topic after you called me out for being a drama queen for my reaction to the "you shouldn't be a mother" comment. I felt like things between us had cooled down since you were not participating on the board much, but since you came back specifically to this thread to call me out again, I can't help but tell you now how I feel. I thought that you of all people would see why I would react like I did, because you are also no stranger to mental illness and it's effects. I remember you posting that you would always be there for me if I needed to talk about ED's and that you understood what I was going through. It really hurts to have you come back and call me out for "blowing up" when you know exactly why this could happen to someone like me you know how I feel. I am sorry to you too, for everything you are struggling with, but I cannot sit back again and let you talk badly about me after I held you to such high regard. And I still do.
bunnyfungo, I know you posted a response to me too but I was in the middle of typing and couldn't go back to your post. I will do better at recognizing what is and is not appropriate and be more careful regarding my beahvior. This is all very hard for me to process and I will do what I can to be a better community member, even if that means ceasing my posts for a while, just to avoid causing a problem, since that seems to be a trend. Thank you for allowing me to continue posting, and I'm sorry for dragging you into this. I hope you are feeling well.
I haven't posted on that board since the day you posted your BFP with absolutely no warning on it.
On a board several of us discussed at length our struggles with IF.
I did NOT call you out there. Just like I did NOT call you out here. My responses are to onesweetworld.
Stop making them about you, and please just stop playing the victim.
I don't think you were calling me out, but your original comment about wanting to punch the smiley face in my post was really hard, along with the other comments that ensued before onesweetworld even posted. I actually felt like you wanted to punch me, and I felt horrible because I felt like I had lost your friendship. If you would still like to keep posting on the other board, I can hide my siggy each time and post a trigger warning each time I feel like I need to discuss my PG. Honestly, it will come up each time, and I cannot prevent that. I would hate for you to not feel uncomfortable posting there because of me, so if you would like, I don't have to post there anymore and will just be there for support. I know you probably need the board more than I do, and I hope I can still offer you the same kind of compassion as before. Thank you for letting me know why you weren't posting.
I haven't posted on that board since the day you posted your BFP with absolutely no warning on it.
On a board several of us discussed at length our struggles with IF.
I did NOT call you out there. Just like I did NOT call you out here. My responses are to onesweetworld.
Stop making them about you, and please just stop playing the victim.
I don't think you were calling me out, but your original comment about wanting to punch the smiley face in my post was really hard, along with the other comments that ensued before onesweetworld even posted. I actually felt like you wanted to punch me, and I felt horrible because I felt like I had lost your friendship. If you would still like to keep posting on the other board, I can hide my siggy each time and post a trigger warning each time I feel like I need to discuss my PG. Honestly, it will come up each time, and I cannot prevent that. I would hate for you to not feel uncomfortable posting there because of me, so if you would like, I don't have to post there anymore and will just be there for support. I know you probably need the board more than I do, and I hope I can still offer you the same kind of compassion as before. Thank you for letting me know why you weren't posting.
I don't think you were calling me out, but your original comment about wanting to punch the smiley face in my post was really hard, along with the other comments that ensued before onesweetworld even posted. I actually felt like you wanted to punch me, and I felt horrible because I felt like I had lost your friendship. If you would still like to keep posting on the other board, I can hide my siggy each time and post a trigger warning each time I feel like I need to discuss my PG. Honestly, it will come up each time, and I cannot prevent that. I would hate for you to not feel uncomfortable posting there because of me, so if you would like, I don't have to post there anymore and will just be there for support. I know you probably need the board more than I do, and I hope I can still offer you the same kind of compassion as before. Thank you for letting me know why you weren't posting.
Your siggy is still not being hidden here...
It is not showing up on my desktop. I went to profile, then settings, then clicked "no" under show signature and then clicked save settings. Is that not correct?
It is not showing up on my desktop. I went to profile, then settings, then clicked "no" under show signature and then clicked save settings. Is that not correct?
I don't think you were calling me out, but your original comment about wanting to punch the smiley face in my post was really hard, along with the other comments that ensued before onesweetworld even posted. I actually felt like you wanted to punch me, and I felt horrible because I felt like I had lost your friendship. If you would still like to keep posting on the other board, I can hide my siggy each time and post a trigger warning each time I feel like I need to discuss my PG. Honestly, it will come up each time, and I cannot prevent that. I would hate for you to not feel uncomfortable posting there because of me, so if you would like, I don't have to post there anymore and will just be there for support. I know you probably need the board more than I do, and I hope I can still offer you the same kind of compassion as before. Thank you for letting me know why you weren't posting.
I won't be posting on that board.
I'm sorry. I hope you can find the support you need on other boards. We're always there for you if you choose to come back.
It is not showing up on my desktop. I went to profile, then settings, then clicked "no" under show signature and then clicked save settings. Is that not correct?
You hid all siggies. Not your own from us.
Dana, thank you. I'm so sorry. That's what I was missing. I'll go change it right now.
@led and @sluttybigb00bz, I feel like I still need to address you ladies a bit more because we have also interacted on different boards that have gone much deeper about personal struggles that affect how we treat ourselves and others. While I have only empathy and pain in my heart for both of you, I would just ask that you be a little gentler in your responses to me. I don't think I have ever been as harsh to anyone as you are being to me right now and it really hurts. I am trying to be careful about not divulging personal details here, but both of you know about my mental illnesses and I know about yours, and I know you would be hurt and triggered if you were treated like I am right now. I am not trying to victimize myself here, because I am the one who made the mistake, but I guess the reason why I am so crushed and feel the need to tell you this is because I thought you would be understanding of my reactions to triggering events like these.
@sluttybigb00bz, I care for you a lot and have followed your IF and mental struggles. What helloerrbody said about not everyone understanding each other's IF journey is absolutely true, I still did my best to give you all of my support and encouragement that I could. So to see this kind of reaction from you in this thread is really hard for me. When people I truly care for turn on me, I have a very hard time dealing with my emotions appropriately and this is why I have more "blow ups" than others. I cannot just let things roll off my back. I am sorry for everything I have said that hurt you and I will still be praying for you to finally get the pregnancy you deserve so much.
@led, in a similar way, you and I have talked about ED's and how they have hurt our lives and relationships. You have shown such bravery and strength and I truly see you as a role model for this reason, because you were able to recover. It is a huge demon for me and often is the result of "blow ups" like these. I respect you and wish I could be as resilient as you, and I was initially going to PM you about this exact topic after you called me out for being a drama queen for my reaction to the "you shouldn't be a mother" comment. I felt like things between us had cooled down since you were not participating on the board much, but since you came back specifically to this thread to call me out again, I can't help but tell you now how I feel. I thought that you of all people would see why I would react like I did, because you are also no stranger to mental illness and it's effects. I remember you posting that you would always be there for me if I needed to talk about ED's and that you understood what I was going through. It really hurts to have you come back and call me out for "blowing up" when you know exactly why this could happen to someone like me you know how I feel. I am sorry to you too, for everything you are struggling with, but I cannot sit back again and let you talk badly about me after I held you to such high regard. And I still do.
bunnyfungo, I know you posted a response to me too but I was in the middle of typing and couldn't go back to your post. I will do better at recognizing what is and is not appropriate and be more careful regarding my beahvior. This is all very hard for me to process and I will do what I can to be a better community member, even if that means ceasing my posts for a while, just to avoid causing a problem, since that seems to be a trend. Thank you for allowing me to continue posting, and I'm sorry for dragging you into this. I hope you are feeling well.
I am truly sorry for your struggles, but you can't use your illness as a plea to get us to coddle you when you continuously post with no regard for others. It doesn't work that way.
It is not showing up on my desktop. I went to profile, then settings, then clicked "no" under show signature and then clicked save settings. Is that not correct?
That makes it so that YOU don't see ANY siggies. That does not disable your siggy.
I haven't posted on that board since the day you posted your BFP with absolutely no warning on it.
On a board several of us discussed at length our struggles with IF.
I did NOT call you out there. Just like I did NOT call you out here. My responses are to onesweetworld.
Stop making them about you, and please just stop playing the victim.
I don't think you were calling me out, but your original comment about wanting to punch the smiley face in my post was really hard, along with the other comments that ensued before onesweetworld even posted. I actually felt like you wanted to punch me, and I felt horrible because I felt like I had lost your friendship. If you would still like to keep posting on the other board, I can hide my siggy each time and post a trigger warning each time I feel like I need to discuss my PG. Honestly, it will come up each time, and I cannot prevent that. I would hate for you to not feel uncomfortable posting there because of me, so if you would like, I don't have to post there anymore and will just be there for support. I know you probably need the board more than I do, and I hope I can still offer you the same kind of compassion as before. Thank you for letting me know why you weren't posting.
I don't understand where you get off saying that at all - you are the one who said that you were crying behind your computer screen because some people posted they thought what you posted was insensitive. And you honestly thought that someone wanting to punch a smiley was like them wanting to punch you? I think SBB is just fine.
This isn't Kindergarten. We don't have to invite everyone to our birthday parties.
It is not showing up on my desktop. I went to profile, then settings, then clicked "no" under show signature and then clicked save settings. Is that not correct?
That makes it so that YOU don't see ANY siggies. That does not disable your siggy.
Would you mind giving me the directions on how to hide my siggy from y'all? I thought that was the only place to go to control siggies. I would really appreciate the help.
That makes it so that YOU don't see ANY siggies. That does not disable your siggy.
Would you mind giving me the directions on how to hide my siggy from y'all? I thought that was the only place to go to control siggies. I would really appreciate the help.
If you're on desktop, whenever you post or quote there's a "Disable signature" check box right above the "Create post" button.
That makes it so that YOU don't see ANY siggies. That does not disable your siggy.
Would you mind giving me the directions on how to hide my siggy from y'all? I thought that was the only place to go to control siggies. I would really appreciate the help.
Click "Disable signature" with every post. That's to the right of the "Post Quick Reply" box or above the "Create Post" box.
So I guess you are implying that the board is our life...!?? WTF. We are allowed to share that something was insensitive in our opinions and that we were hurt by it. I was not being rude or speaking like a child.
Again, I do not think that this is about "I go here and you go there," but I do think that people should be sensitive with what they say when they post on certain boards. I'm sure you would agree that someone should be careful with what they post on certain boards, no?
I'm not implying that it is your life, I am saying other people act like it is.
I agree that there are certain boards that we should be careful what we post. I personally do not feel GKU is one of them. We have so many different types of people in different situations on this board that I don't think censorship is needed here.
I've been trying to stay out of this, and I'm only now catching up, but this is all kinds of fucking wrong. You should watch what you say on any board, but especially on a board with women who are still trying to gku when you may be ku already. It's just common sense.
By the way icequeen, what did you mean when you told SBB "I know you probably need the board more than I do". That's just fucking cold.
She said that there were other people struggling with IF on that board, so it would be more helpful to her to talk to others still struggling instead of me staying on there. I thought that it would help if she started posting there again because it was helpful in the past to both her and me when dealing with IF, but now that I am PG, I don't want it to deter her from still getting the mental support she needs. Please do not twist my words around and make it seem like I'm insulting her, because I would never do that to people I care about. There was absolutely nothing malicious or suggestive in what I posted.
By the way icequeen, what did you mean when you told SBB "I know you probably need the board more than I do". That's just fucking cold.
She said that there were other people struggling with IF on that board, so it would be more helpful to her to talk to others still struggling instead of me staying on there. I thought that it would help if she started posting there again because it was helpful in the past to both her and me when dealing with IF, but now that I am PG, I don't want it to deter her from still getting the mental support she needs. Please do not twist my words around and make it seem like I'm insulting her, because I would never do that to people I care about. There was absolutely nothing malicious or suggestive in what I posted.
I wasn't trying to twist your words, which is exactly why I asked you what you meant when you said that. Just be careful, because it seems like you say many things that are unintentionally hurtful.
@led and @sluttybigb00bz, I feel like I still need to address you ladies a bit more because we have also interacted on different boards that have gone much deeper about personal struggles that affect how we treat ourselves and others. While I have only empathy and pain in my heart for both of you, I would just ask that you be a little gentler in your responses to me. I don't think I have ever been as harsh to anyone as you are being to me right now and it really hurts. I am trying to be careful about not divulging personal details here, but both of you know about my mental illnesses and I know about yours, and I know you would be hurt and triggered if you were treated like I am right now. I am not trying to victimize myself here, because I am the one who made the mistake, but I guess the reason why I am so crushed and feel the need to tell you this is because I thought you would be understanding of my reactions to triggering events like these.
@sluttybigb00bz, I care for you a lot and have followed your IF and mental struggles. What helloerrbody said about not everyone understanding each other's IF journey is absolutely true, I still did my best to give you all of my support and encouragement that I could. So to see this kind of reaction from you in this thread is really hard for me. When people I truly care for turn on me, I have a very hard time dealing with my emotions appropriately and this is why I have more "blow ups" than others. I cannot just let things roll off my back. I am sorry for everything I have said that hurt you and I will still be praying for you to finally get the pregnancy you deserve so much.
@led, in a similar way, you and I have talked about ED's and how they have hurt our lives and relationships. You have shown such bravery and strength and I truly see you as a role model for this reason, because you were able to recover. It is a huge demon for me and often is the result of "blow ups" like these. I respect you and wish I could be as resilient as you, and I was initially going to PM you about this exact topic after you called me out for being a drama queen for my reaction to the "you shouldn't be a mother" comment. I felt like things between us had cooled down since you were not participating on the board much, but since you came back specifically to this thread to call me out again, I can't help but tell you now how I feel. I thought that you of all people would see why I would react like I did, because you are also no stranger to mental illness and it's effects. I remember you posting that you would always be there for me if I needed to talk about ED's and that you understood what I was going through. It really hurts to have you come back and call me out for "blowing up" when you know exactly why this could happen to someone like me you know how I feel. I am sorry to you too, for everything you are struggling with, but I cannot sit back again and let you talk badly about me after I held you to such high regard. And I still do.
bunnyfungo, I know you posted a response to me too but I was in the middle of typing and couldn't go back to your post. I will do better at recognizing what is and is not appropriate and be more careful regarding my beahvior. This is all very hard for me to process and I will do what I can to be a better community member, even if that means ceasing my posts for a while, just to avoid causing a problem, since that seems to be a trend. Thank you for allowing me to continue posting, and I'm sorry for dragging you into this. I hope you are feeling well.
Stop being a drama queen. Stop playing the victim. And for fucks sake, if you can't handle life get the fuck off the internet. I'm not here to hold your hand and I don't need to put up with all your shit just because I had an ED and struggle with mental health issues. If you want to talk about recovery and what worked for me or need advice/someone to talk to, feel free to PM me. But you're far too melodramatic and tactless for me to ignore.
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