~~ Weekly Check In: 6/23/15 ~~

[icequeen]

Hi ladies!

Time for our weekly check in, so if you feel comfortable, please let us know how your week is going and how you are feeling. Please also use trigger warnings where appropriate and PM me if you would like to be tagged as a reminder for participation. Hope y'all have a great rest of the week!

flcl, mrsb1008, yoshijo28, @rocknrollfriend, @wallflwr926, @ordinaryamy, helloamanda, @giamia923, snarkysparklefart, @alleykat05, bluerainfire, sko14, @erin2021, spencer1337, RedDDD, juliayadda, motownthrowdown

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Please state your diagnosis and/or status:

How is your week going?

Any struggles or accomplishments you would like to share?

Any changes in medication or recent appointments?

GTKY: What was your favorite class in grade school, high school, and college (if you went to college)? How have your interests evolved?

[yoshijo28]

Hello everyone


**eating disorder mentioned**

Diagnosis: anorexia, ocd, anxiety

How is your week going? I had a pretty good weekend and work is good so far this week, with the exception of having to fire someone yesterday. That sucked

Struggles: I'm still exercising more than I told MH and he called me out on it. He wants me in treatment and I keep delaying it as long as possible. I want to wait until after summer so I can wear long sleeves in the fall and not worry if people see me gain weight.

Accomplishments: I was worried about being around so much food last weekend and told myself it was ok to throw up if I needed to. Luckily I didn't even want to. I had ice cream cake and some cookie too. My stomach hurt Monday because it's not used to that but I was happy that although I felt anxious I didn't feel the need to binge or purge.

Changes in appointments: therapist is off this week so no appointments

GTKY: I loved history and majored in it in college and took mostly African history classes. I student taught in South Africa for 2 months. I'm still interested in history and culture but MH is hesitant to travel too much. He doesn't know it but I want us to take a trip to South Africa and somewhere else next yr

[yoshijo28]

Jun 23, 2015 15:46:02 GMT -5 @giamia923 said:

Jun 23, 2015 15:08:40 GMT -5 yoshijo28 said:

Hello everyone


**eating disorder mentioned**

Diagnosis: anorexia, ocd, anxiety

How is your week going? I had a pretty good weekend and work is good so far this week, with the exception of having to fire someone yesterday. That sucked

Struggles: I'm still exercising more than I told MH and he called me out on it. He wants me in treatment and I keep delaying it as long as possible. I want to wait until after summer so I can wear long sleeves in the fall and not worry if people see me gain weight.

Accomplishments: I was worried about being around so much food last weekend and told myself it was ok to throw up if I needed to. Luckily I didn't even want to. I had ice cream cake and some cookie too. My stomach hurt Monday because it's not used to that but I was happy that although I felt anxious I didn't feel the need to binge or purge.

Changes in appointments: therapist is off this week so no appointments

GTKY: I loved history and majored in it in college and took mostly African history classes. I student taught in South Africa for 2 months. I'm still interested in history and culture but MH is hesitant to travel too much. He doesn't know it but I want us to take a trip to South Africa and somewhere else next yr

That sucks about having to fire someone! I'm sure it wasn't easy. Glad to hear that you did not feel the need to binge or purge! It sounds like your H is trying to be supportive and holding you accountable. My H calls me out on my spending and my go to reaction is to be defensive... working on that one.... I just have to remember that he loves me and wants what's best for me and our family.

My reaction is to get defensive too and make excuses. He's gentle in the way he calls me out. I think I'm so smart trying to figure out how to spend extra time at the gym and he knows exactly how much longer I've been going. I know he's worried for my health and our future. Like you said he has my best interests at heart. For one week I actually upheld our agreement and came home in time to cook with him. I had him make me accountable by telling him when I left work and when I got to the gym so he'd know when to expect me home. I was supposed to cut my time down even more by now but I've gone back to where I was. But I know he's just trying to help

[kaeguri]

**Pregnancy mentioned**

Please state your diagnosis and/or status: GAD, depression, ADD

How is your week going? Better than last week mentally, physically- blaaaah. Stupid food poisoning/stomach bug. I've haven't broken down into a hysterical crying mess so far this week, I was able to get out of the house yesterday too. H is doing a great job of trying to keep me busy when I don't want to be lol. We had a false labor scare sunday and surprisingly I didn't panic. I think I was in too much pain to panic though.

Any struggles or accomplishments you would like to share? I only had one panic attack so far since Saturday. Trying to start this meditation thing but anxiety + ADD does not make that easy, ha.

Any changes in medication or recent appointments? I meet with the new therapist lady this afternoon. I really hope I like her.

GTKY: What was your favorite class in grade school, high school, and college (if you went to college)? How have your interests evolved? Grade school and high, probably math. I'm a nerd. I also loved chorus in high school and my US history teacher really got me interested in history for the first time in my life. In college, I took an architectural history class I found fascinating, also a WWII history from an actually WWII vet so his first person perspectives were amazing. I still love learning about WWII, still obsessed with architecture. (I'm a civil engineer.)

[yoshijo28]

@giamia923 glad to hear you're getting more sleep. Hopefully that will help you focus better on LO during the day. I don't have LOs yet but I imagine I'm going to have a similiar challenge with staying present and in the moment with them when my mind is always elsewhere. Also good news you were able to attend therapy this week

kaeguri hope your stomach feels better, that's the worst! good luck with your therapy appointment today, I hope you like the therapist. Let us know!

[RedDDD]

Please state your diagnosis and/or status: Depression, Anxiety

How is your week going? Decent

Any struggles or accomplishments you would like to share? Im on week #2 of being a single parent, DH comes home Friday and shouldn't have to go back to that job. I think I have done pretty well. Im exhausted and this morning was rough cuz I woke up to a flurry of emails from people in our UK office and from my boss and I ended up stressing out and working for about a half hour when I should have been getting myself ready for work. SO I ended up behind schedule and the kids got up and were waiting for me and I kind of lost control of the morning. oh well....

Still struggle with wanting to drink wine every night. Some days I feel like maybe Im over thinking this and its ok but then I feel like if I want to stop I should stop. But I know its hindering my weight loss goals.....ugh...I just love sitting down in the quiet of my house after everyone has gone to bed with a couple glasses of wine and peace. Its my retreat but I know I should chose a healthier retreat.

Any changes in medication or recent appointments? nope

GTKY: What was your favorite class in grade school, high school, and college (if you went to college)? How have your interests evolved? Loved my art classes. I took a jewelry making class in high school that I just loved. In college I was an Art history major and I basically loved all my major courses but maybe the class I took on Pompeii was a highlight.

[icequeen]

yoshijo28, I get why you want to put off gaining weight and doing more intensive treatment until the fall, because it would make me feel more comfortable too. I think it is amazing that you are still open to the idea and considering your options. I guess my only reserve with waiting that long for you is that I know you are planning on IVF in the fall and I worry the stress of that will hinder your chances for getting better. You did so well over the weekend and I am so glad you didn't start up with new behaviors like purging.
@giamia923, so glad you and your LO are sleeping better! That will definitely help your mood at work for sure. Great job with remembering your appt this week, too!
kaeguri, it really seems like you had a successful week with only one panic attack and no crying meltdowns like last week. It must be so hard to control that with limited meds. I hope you had a successful therapy appt today and hope you update us on it. Hang in there mama!
RedDDD, you are doing an amazing job by yourself and please don't beat yourself up for one bad morning. I'm sure anyone in your position would have been equally stressed and frazzled. With the wine drinking, would you ever consider doing like a wine spritzer instead of a full glass? Have you been avoiding stocking up? I think you are really doing well.

* Pregnancy and ED mentioned *

Please state your diagnosis and/or status: Anorexia/Bulimia Nervosa, GAD, PPD, dissociative disorder

How is your week going? It's going pretty well so far. I had my OB appt and redraw to check my electrolytes and only one marker was a little low, but not worse than last time. It's good enough to stay out of the hospital and off of the IV so I'm going to keep pushing myself to do better with my eating. I had another huge fight with DH over the weekend but we were able to work things out and settled on a peaceful resolution. My psych was really pushing for me to do inpatient treatment throughout my PG but there is no way I could do that, so she and my dietitian discharged me. My OB asked if I could reconnect with her and find another option, so I have an appt with the psych and MH next month. MH is also asking his job for a medical work from home permission, so I can attend more therapy and have a less stressful PG with DD running around. I was so happy that he did that for me, because I know it's not easy for him either and he doesn't want me to be in inpatient away from DD either.

Any struggles or accomplishments you would like to share? I struggled with binging and purging over the weekend because of our fight, and I am still having negative body image issues. I am happy that I am still motivated to return to non ED days and challenge myself with "scary" foods over the next few days. I am also exercising 45 minutes instead of an hour, daily.

Any changes in medication or recent appointments? Meds the same, therapy tomorrow

GTKY: What was your favorite class in grade school, high school, and college (if you went to college)? How have your interests evolved? I loved art and reading in grade school, English in high school, and my pre-med classes in college. Especially medical ethics. I wish I could redo college, I am such a nerd!

[runnergirl812]

*Trigger alert - death mentioned*

Please state your diagnosis and/or status: GAD

How is your week going? Pretty good.
Any struggles or accomplishments you would like to share? Accomplishments: I'm on top of a major deadline, I got kudos from a physician who I helped out through my job, and I *may* hear something about a new job today or tomorrow. Stuggles: I have had to stay away from FB/media due to the shootings in Charleston/Flag debate. SC is my home state, have connections to Charleston, and I have really strong opinions about that damn flag. I find myself getting angry and I just have to walk away. I'm struggling to remember to breathe. I feel like my anxiety levels have gone down tremendously thanks to the meds, but I need to focus more on what things I can do for self-management.

Any changes in medication or recent appointments? No changes.

GTKY: What was your favorite class in grade school, high school, and college (if you went to college)? How have your interests evolved? Favorite classes in hs and college were English and biology. I was a big fan of Victorian lit. One of my favorite professors (I took every one of her classes) died while I was in college. I still think about her. I went on to become a biology major, but my love of literature and reading have helped me in my career as a medical writer.

[kaeguri]

runnergirl812, I've also had to stay away from news media and social media due to the flag debate. I live in Charleston, SC, lived my whole life within SC, so I have lots of strong feelings too. Ragey, strong feelings. Breathing is good. *hugs*

Edit: I forgot to update on the therapist. It went really well, the lady is really friendly and open and I can see this being a good thing. In the initial consult, she asked me a few questions that brought up long buried memories about my parents and I had a momentary freak out. It's something I need to come to terms with anyways, but I prefer leaving it buried and forgotten (even though it's not).

[KayVeeKay]

***trigger alert-death mentioned***

Diagnosis: PPD

Week: Work has been awful this week. I have had to deconflict everyone's schedule about 20 times, and I'm the only person in my office consistently enough to know what's going on and actually be able to do it. I don't know how many times I've wanted to tear my hair out with this stupid schedule they have us on right now. Aside from the normal stressors, I found out that I may be out of a job as early as September (while DH is gone) and that my step mom's father was murdered last week within about 30 minutes of each other. I'm so glad I don't have to work tomorrow. I don't think I could take another day of this shit.

Struggles: The only thing I've actually struggled with this week is going to sleep. I lost my cool once and cried, but it was after the double-whammy of job and family, so even I can give myself a pass there.

Accomplishments: I'm really working at staying positive. I've done a whole lot of research (as has DH) the past several days about my medical stuff, so hopefully I can make sure they don't screw me over.

Meds/appts: no med changes. I had an appt with my PCP yesterday about an ankle injury which I'm going to PT for and to request another sleep study for comparison to the one I had done while I was pregnant since I was diagnosed with hypersomnia while pregnant and depressed. I don't know if it'll make a difference, but I just want to get a definitive answer of whether or not the original diagnosis is correct or not.

GTKY: I always loved science, which is why I got a degree in physics, but now I hate it so much. If I could do it again, I would get a degree in linguistics.

[icequeen]

KayVeeKay, I really admire that you are trying to stay positive amidst all the pain and anger you are feeling both with your family and at work. I know you love your job and I hope you can work things out so that the schedule is more manageable. It pisses me the hell off that you are still dealing with this misdiagnosis crap. I understand that you have a complicated history but that's no excuse for you to be pushed around and juggled like that. There is NO way you could get an outside opinion off base?
runnergirl812, I am continuing to stay hopeful for your new job. So many hugs to you re: SC and the flag debate. You are absolutely doing the right thing by distancing yourself from these triggering convos, and if you really feel like you need to vent about your feelings, do it with a trusted family member like your BF who will listen no matter what.