Post by AppropriateChocolate on Jun 24, 2015 12:47:44 GMT -5
we all seem to be missing out on some sleep or something so post it here...Dear Lo, Dh, Boss etc.
Dear LO: I know you woke up at 4 this morning and the mean nurse gave you shots but you would feel so much better if you took a nap.. and let mummy nap too. Also please stop grabbing my nip it hurts and although you think it's funny and laugh ... It's not. K, Thanks Love Mummy
If you think you're fooling me about sleep, think again. You sleep from 6-5 with 1 wake up, how is it that you only nap for 30 min? Also, 5am wake ups are killing my soul. At the end of the day however, let's be honest, you're the boss and I will run to you because I'm weak...and I think you know that.
Dear LO, the doctor cut your cord so you are no longer attached to me. If I go pee-you do not need to sit on my lap, if I eat-you do not need to eat at the exact same time, if I leave the room-you do not HAVE to come with me as I will always come back. P.s. my nipples are not made of rubber so please stop biting down on them with your gums and pulling them to see just how far they will stretch. P.p.s. Smiling at me while doing this does not make it hurt less. Love Mum
You were a jerk last night waking every 2 hours to wiggle. I will remember this and will wiggle in public in front of your school as I send you off when you're a teenager.
Can you choose a side to nap on and go with it? This waking yourself up every time you roll over is getting tiring. I don't mind the extra snuggles or naps on my shoulder for now, but this is not an OK solution.
I know you are "finding your voice", but can you lose that high pitched scream* that sounds like you are burning alive? Or just save it for when you are actually burning alive.
Tired of being chastised by strangers' faces in public,
Mom
*Also you can lose any/all screams you are currently playing on rotation for your own amusement. What happened to cooing and giggling? That was awesome.
I know you are "finding your voice", but can you lose that high pitched scream* that sounds like you are burning alive? Or just save it for when you are actually burning alive.
Tired of being chastised by strangers' faces in public,
Mom
*Also you can lose any/all screams you are currently playing on rotation for your own amusement. What happened to cooing and giggling? That was awesome.
Please stop screaming in my face and hitting and kicking me when I'm trying to help you get to sleep. Why is it so easy for you to sleep at night but so hard during the day?
I know you're having tummy troubles, but do you really need to vomit on EVERYTHING I own? Can't you just aim for the floor instead of down my shirt?
K thanks, Forever smelling like baby vomit
When DD was super sick and threw up for two months, our floor was awful. And it's carpet. I've cleaned it a ton and it doesn't smell, but if the light is just right, you can see the tons of spots on our floor. I'm shocked I got the sweet potato upchuck out of the carpet.
I appreciate tor decision to sleep from 830 to 330 instead of being up every 3 hours. Hopefully this is not a one-off event because I was doing work until 1130pm and went to sleep fully expecting you to wake up in any second. Angry boobs won't stay angry long if this becomes a new habit.
I love you very much. Always remember that. I'm very proud of everything you've learned in these short months. But please for the love of god, either learn to roll back on to your back, or learn that if you don't want to be on your tummy, DON'T ROLL ONTO YOUR TUMMY. You're driving me round the bend!
With unconditional -yet sometimes a little bit harder to remember than usual- love,
The angry zombie grunty lady who gives you your milk
This whole pooping right after I change your diaper and outfit is getting tiring and expensive (that is a lot of diapers dudette!) can we calm down on the BMs?
Post by AppropriateChocolate on Jul 2, 2015 12:17:56 GMT -5
Dear Divalicious Daughter of Mine:
Mommy's excited that you like solid foods but can you keep your hands out of my plate and of my food. Andplusalso I'm sure you shouldn't be licking my honey bun, the Dr has not cleared you for those foods yet. Also can I have my Coca-Cola that I will never see my name on to mYself.
I know you are "finding your voice", but can you lose that high pitched scream* that sounds like you are burning alive? Or just save it for when you are actually burning alive.
Tired of being chastised by strangers' faces in public,
Mom
*Also you can lose any/all screams you are currently playing on rotation for your own amusement. What happened to cooing and giggling? That was awesome.
The little pterodactyl/velociraptor.
I call DD a baby terodactyl and tell her they can't live in my house.
It is really OK to go to bed before 7:30. Don't get me wrong I am a OK with your normal bedtime, but when you are alternating between being fussy and falling asleep in daddy's arms it is ok to fall asleep in your bed a few minutes early.
Post by FlutterOfYoshis on Jul 6, 2015 10:04:07 GMT -5
Dear Squishy,
Over the past 24 hours you have broken my heart to pieces with your crying for your pacifier. That is why I now want to THANK YOU for the abundance of smiles you've been giving me today, since you've found your finger instead and managed to get some great sleep. Keep it up, Little Bit!
Post by AppropriateChocolate on Jul 6, 2015 10:21:14 GMT -5
Dear Diva of Mine:
Thank you tremendously for making mommy smile today after Daddy being such a jerk. Also two thumbs up for spitting up on his side of the bed..mommy is so proud of you. You have my back!
Dear LO, Are you pooping this much so you weigh less at your pedi appointment this afternoon? I'm sorry everyone calls you fat but you really don't have to poop this much. Tush wiping extraordinaire, Momma
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