How to Get Comfortable Nurisng in Public

[billyhorrible]

There are a million hard things about breastfeeding, and I vividly remember that with my first getting him to latch was tear-inducing.  And LBB had a fantastic latch.  But trying to balance tiny newborn and giant boob, and get into the right position was hard enough.  Even worse when you felt like everyone was watching you, or the baby was crying and therefore everyone would be watching you. But I think it's really important to get out of the house - for your mental health.

So here are my favorite tips to help you get comfortable nursing in public.  Like with real estate, the main emphasis is location, location, location.  The first time I ever nursed in public was on a small trail by my house while we were out on a walk.  It was such a great experience because no one was around!

1) Nordstrom.  I know, this sounds silly, but I passed this on to my SIL when she was a new mother and she said it saved her sanity.  Nordstrom has some of the nicest "mother's lounges" - comfy couches/chairs in a private space.  So start out with a trip to the mall/Nordstroms.  You'll have a "safe space" to go when baby gets hungry, in that you don't need to worry about disturbing people or an audience. 

2) Mommy Movies. Check with your local theaters to see if they do this, of the 4 movie chains in my area, only one does, but it's worth it.  They're movies especially geared toward moms with infants.  Not the movies themselves (DH and I saw Girl with a Dragon Tattoo this way) but the atmosphere.  Not completely dark, changing tables in the aisle, and everyone there is a nursing mom.  So no one even bats an eye if a baby starts crying, and chances are the woman 3 seats down from you will be whipping out her own breast at some point too.  Plus the low lighting helps you not feel like the spotlight is on you.

3) Invest in a beautiful nursing cover.  I am by no means saying that you HAVE to wear a cover and I will throw my support 100% behind any mom who doesn't want to wear one.  That being said, for me, personally, I'm more comfortable wearing one, especially in the beginning so no one could really see me struggling to get "into position."  When we went to the concert last week, there were at least 5 or 6 of us present on the grass just hanging out with covers on - felt like being part of a secret group.

You also may find your own little "special" places - like there was a supermarket by our old place that had a "man lounge" - giant oversized leather chairs and televisions.  I loved shopping there because it was such a comfortable place to nurse.  And while I never went to a LaLecheLeague meeting, it's a great space for getting comfortable with nursing in public, because that certainly goes on there and is a very supportive environment.

[kemdupuis]

These are some great tips- thanks for sharing billyhorrible! I was thrust into nursing in public earlier this week at LOs first Drs appointment. I had nursed him right before we left home, but apparently, he wasn't done and screamed the entire time. It was so awkward. Wish I had seen some of your tips before then!

[dogmama22]

Thank you! We've been packing pumped bottles for on the go, but I'd love to get the hang of nursing in public soon.

[Bluedaisy]

billyhorrible, Thank you for the tips! I really appreciate the one on the nursing cover...I'm a teacher in a fairly small city so the idea of one of my students running into me nursing worried me but I wondered if the cover was worth it, or just one of the never used gadgets...after all I have 7000000 baby blankets. It's good to hear that someone really likes theirs.

[tulips114]

I'll add a suggestion...

Layer 2 shirts, either a nursing tank or a cami type tank that you can pull down, then you're shirt you're wearing on top. That way you pull the top shirt up and the bottom one down and you're not exposing your belly at all.

[silv3rlining]

Bluedaisy I used my nursing cover with DS til we weaned. I nursed him til 14 months but when we weaned he was down to only wake up and bed time nursing. But I had my cover with me just in case. I haven't used my cover yet this time but I've been using the muslin blankets (tucking a corner under the opposite side bra strap that I'm nursing on). I also have a nursing scarf I bought to use with this LO.

[missjenniebean]

Thank you!

[erbear]

What cover do you like? I had a Bebe au lait one on my registry but figured I'd use my Aden & anais blankets.

[billyhorrible]

Jun 27, 2015 11:45:45 GMT -5 erbear said:

What cover do you like? I had a Bebe au lait one on my registry but figured I'd use my Aden & anais blankets.

I think this is going to vary by person.   I know a ton of people who just using a blanket, personally I like the Bebe au Lait because I like the boning that holds the top away from me, both so I can see baby (and he can see me) and because I feel like it helps with airflow.  Plus - pretty.  I mean, the A&A blankets are pretty too, but I went out to dinner with my friend on Thursday who also has a June baby and I was totally lusting after her nursing cover, which ended up being Bebe au lait.

[Deleted]

Practice at home in front of a mirror. like in the bathroom. drag a chair in there, hard and uncomfy one like you'll find all sorts of places when you are out and about. and try different things.

Practice pulling up/over minimal amount to latch on. AT home we tend to let it all hang out, so try doing it with minimal stuff showing, so you can see what it actually looks like.

I only nursed with a regular nursing bra and usually a big of a baggy shirt. I would untuck the shirt if it was tucked in and undo bra flap. Lay baby down sort of in position, and then reach up and pull down bra flap under my shirt. get baby closer into position and pull up edge of shirt just a bit so baby could get to the areola and nipple to latch. pull shirt down all the way around and right to edge of areola/baby's mouth to cover most things. I live in Phoenix and about the time I started going out more, it was way way too HOT to put any kind of cover over us, although I did use a super thin birdseye weave unfolded diaper as a lightweight blankie if I needed a bit of coverage.

use diaper bag to help prop baby in place esp if you are used to a boppy or other nursing pillow at home.

Scope out restaurants with booths where the table is a bit away from the bench, so there is room to sit down and hold baby in nursing position and not hit their head on the table. Then you can one handed nurse and eat and the booth gives you a bit of shield.

Changing rooms in most stores will allow you to sit in there and nurse. scope out which ones have the most comfy benches. of course then you have to stare at yourself in the mirror. lol

bring back up. if you are uncomfy, bring dh or a friend or mom or whatever. They can sit next to you as a shield between you and the majority of the public.

Scope out baby stores and other stores that may have a family bathroom with a seat or a nursing room.

practice practice practice.

Keep in mind if you take bottles out with you instead of nursing, you really really should pump while you are out or as soon as possible cause you are so early on it's not good for your supply to skip feeds. It's way easier to find a place to nurse discretely than to pump!

[veggiemo]

So many good suggestions here! I agree with the Bebe au lait covers, they are great.
For me the best thing to do thats already been mentioned is PRACTICE. The more you do it, the more comfortable you will be and the more successful the sessions will become. Just get out there and be confident!

[bruunk]

These are great tips!! I've found I'm more shy than I thought I'd be about breastfeeding. My sister and her bf visit a lot and I constantly try and cover for his sake (sounds silly when I say it) especially since baby and I are still figuring this out at home where I can be too less and just do what needs to be done. Thank you for the tips!!

[silv3rlining]

Jun 27, 2015 11:45:45 GMT -5 erbear said:

What cover do you like? I had a Bebe au lait one on my registry but figured I'd use my Aden & anais blankets.

I have one by Boppy

[dogmama22]

@amyg so what should pumping to replace a feeding really look like? We ended up starting with pumping and bottles in the hospital since LO was in the special care nursery for a bit, so I kept with occasionally doing it at home. Right now I pump both sides to about 3 1/2 oz each because I never got instructions with what I was supposed to do. LO still does fine at the next feeding and I don't seem to have an over supply. Is this the correct thing to do? If not, can I just hook up one side to the pump or is there something else I should do?

[daydreamernyc]

I will add that the Bebe au lait works well. I always have my cover when ever I leave the house and I have no problem nursing pretty much anywhere. Coffee shops are great too. When in a pinch, buy a cup of coffee and take a seat off to the side.

[gilder40]

If wearing a cami tank is too hot for the area you are in, Target has belly bands that are a spandex material. They look like a cami under your shirt, but only go up over your stomach. So when you lift your shirt, you would have converage of your tummy without the extra hassle of lowering a tank top. I wear those when I know I will be nursing in front of people. Even my family I'm a little self-conscious.

[mrsholley1344]

DH and I got so excited about the mommy movie idea!! I just started looking it up but it doesn't look like its offered in GA any more. There was a bring your baby matinee that AMC did, but it looks like it was started back in '12 and did not last. Anyone in GA have better luck? 

[Deleted]

You can also go to an LLL meeting, and you'll see other moms nursing in all sorts of ways wearing all sorts of clothing and bra combinations and get pointers from them on how to nurse in public comfortably.

[wifedeangel]

A lot of my nursing shirts have stretchy necklines that you pull down, so to cover the top part of my breast, I just use a burp rag. That way, pretty much everything is still covered, but I don't have to deal with an actual cover. Right now, DS is like shark when he feeds, and like to pop on and off all the time, so dealing with that and a cover at the time is challenging.

[tiffbot]

These are all great tips and a great thread to have started for everyone! Lots of practice and once you get comfortable you'll definitely get more creative with finding ways to cover up if you choose to do so. Yesterday I was out at the farm with friends and family and at one point was just using my hat to shade her head and hide the boob, haha.

With DS spending 2 weeks in a non-private NICU (there was 6 big bays and his generally accommodated 6-8 babies at a time) I learned how to breastfeed in front of all sorts of strangers and moms and dads of other babies, so while there was still a big learning curve leaving, I think it helped for my first experience to just be right out there doing it. So that's my advice, just keep doing what you are doing, get out there, sometimes the anticipation is just as or more stressful than the actual event! And if you have some crappy outings well, that's just how it will go. You'll likely think about it more than the public you are around. Good luck to everyone!

[silv3rlining]

Jun 28, 2015 16:13:00 GMT -5 tiffbot said:

These are all great tips and a great thread to have started for everyone! Lots of practice and once you get comfortable you'll definitely get more creative with finding ways to cover up if you choose to do so. Yesterday I was out at the farm with friends and family and at one point was just using my hat to shade her head and hide the boob, haha.

With DS spending 2 weeks in a non-private NICU (there was 6 big bays and his generally accommodated 6-8 babies at a time) I learned how to breastfeed in front of all sorts of strangers and moms and dads of other babies, so while there was still a big learning curve leaving, I think it helped for my first experience to just be right out there doing it. So that's my advice, just keep doing what you are doing, get out there, sometimes the anticipation is just as or more stressful than the actual event! And if you have some crappy outings well, that's just how it will go. You'll likely think about it more than the public you are around. Good luck to everyone!

I was going to say one of the best ways to get comfortable doing it is just doing it. Sounds like simple advice but I know for some people the longer they waited the more difficult it was.

[Deleted]

Yeah just do it, it's not just a Nike slogan! lol

If you are really scared, try this experiment.
Go sit on the backporch or in the backyard and nurse.
Change of location takes away all the stuff you normally have next to you when nursing in the house, and gives you an idea of what it's like to nurse with just what you carry in your diaper bag.
Bonus for Vitamin D!

[dogmama22]

We successfully nursed 3 times in public today!! I decided to try a different cover and it made all the difference. We were hanging out at the sailing club where I'm comfortable and there was another mama nursing, so I decided to give it a shot. The first time, I went in a changing room and got him latched and covered and then walked out. The next two times we just went for it and it was just fine! I'm so excited we finally went for it!

[mrskblack11]

Great advice ladies!

Successfully nursed in a booth at a restaurant while eating sushi! I was more uncomfortable that my FIL was sitting across from us than being at a restaurant or strangers looking at us. I was wearing a nursing tank under a button up sleeveless shirt and used a muslin blanket to cover up.

[lunalovegood]

I agree with the just do it. It really does get easier the more you do it.

This weekend we were all over with the kids so there was a lot of public nursing going on... soccer field-check, baseball diamond-check, park-check, running across the park with baby attached to the boob because DD fell and smashed her face-check, ER-check, church-check, grandma's nursing home common area patio-check.