My two are 14.5 months apart and I'm only keeping my head above water right now because H has been home. I cry when I think about him returning to work and doing this alone. Our older DD has become a total wreck since bringing home DD2 and I don't even know how to manage her these days.
Any tips or tricks to share? Any btdt moms with tips?
Also a btdt mom. My oldest 2 are 18 months apart. You will find a routine and it will get easier and easier. There will be good days and bad days. Take it hour by hour if you have to. Try not to think about next week or tomorrow or even the afternoon in the morning. Just survive until the next thing...lunch, nap, snack, whatever.
Wearing the baby was a life saver! It's the only way I could get anything done, like cook dinner.
When I had to nurse DD2, I closed us all off in the play room so DD1 couldn't run all over the house with me being unable to chase her. I turned on Bubble Guppies, and that usually kept her pretty entertained while I nursed. I sat down on the floor to nurse so I could play with her a bit. I suggest saving something special for while you are feeding baby. Whether it's a game on a tablet, TV, a basket of special toys, maybe coloring. Something you know will keep her interest for a bit while you feed the baby. Save it for only while you're feeding so that it doesn't get boring.
We tried to get out of the house everyday. Whether it was grocery shopping, a trip to Target or just a walk in the neighborhood. Change of scenery is good for everyone and it keeps your older child entertained for a while. (Again, wearing the baby really helped with trips to the store and that was how I went on walks with them, DD1 in the stroller and me wearing DD2)
Keep baby close, but play with your DD1. I would often let DD2 sleep in the boppy or just on a blanket on the floor in the play room while I played with DD1. She needs time with you too and new babies generally sleep a lot, so it's a good opportunity to get one on one time with DD1 while keeping baby close too.
Sometimes they both cry. Situate your toddler first.
Nap! My DD1 would take a 3 hour nap from 1ish to 4ish. As soon as I had her down I would nurse DD2 in my room and keep it dark and quiet and I was almost always able to get her to sleep after that, so I could get a nap too.
Post by sugarkissed on Jun 30, 2015 23:08:20 GMT -5
Mine are 21 months apart. Since we've been home DD1 has definitely had an increase in temper tantrums and she has become really clingy. If someone else is over I can't leave the room without her having a meltdown and calling for me.
The hardest thing right now is not lifting her because of my csection. She keeps wanting up and doesn't understand why I am always holding the baby and not her. I have struggled with guilt because she seems so sad about it. DH went back to work today, so my mom has come to help out. DD still always asks for me, which is surprising because she normally is crazy about grandma. I know that things will get easier, but its been tough for DD and I emotionally so far.
That said, having a newborn seems remarkably easy now that I'm used to my crazy busy toddler!
Post by silv3rlining on Jul 1, 2015 9:26:18 GMT -5
I've tried to keep DS (23 m) schedule as normal as possible. He has been watching a bit more TV than I'd like but I'm tired and it keeps him entertained. He's also had some jealousy/tantrum issues, but I think some of it is because he's about to be 2.
Sorry I don't quite go here since DS is 2 years and 3 months but everything moms are mentioning I can relate to. I was wondering if anyone has advice for what your bedtime routine is now that you have 2 ( juggling both without DH there)
Our routine was dinner, bath ( bath every other night) read books then we would cuddle in his bed for 30 min and he would fall asleep while I cuddled him. Now that I have LO bedtime he will go on full on meltdown mode if DH tries to put him to sleep or when I do it he drags it out so long and then I end up needing to feed the baby and DS melts down crying.
Sorry I don't quite go here since DS is 2 years and 3 months but everything moms are mentioning I can relate to. I was wondering if anyone has advice for what your bedtime routine is now that you have 2 ( juggling both without DH there)
Our routine was dinner, bath ( bath every other night) read books then we would cuddle in his bed for 30 min and he would fall asleep while I cuddled him. Now that I have LO bedtime he will go on full on meltdown mode if DH tries to put him to sleep or when I do it he drags it out so long and then I end up needing to feed the baby and DS melts down crying.
Here's what I did with 2 - Feed/top off the baby before you start. I used to bathe them together and bring all the baby's stuff in the bathroom. Soap them up and rinse them, then get the baby out and get her lotion and PJs on right there on the floor mat while DD1 played in the bath a bit longer. Then put the baby in the bouncy seat while I got DD1 out of the bath and lotion PJs, etc. read a story all of you together. Give the baby to DH, or move the bouncy seat just outside the room to the hall to finish up with a song with DD1. Then into bed.
DD is one month on Saturday, and DS is 2 years on Sunday (ahh!), so I've already almost finished my run of 2u2. I don't really have advice, since Ive only been doing this for 4 weeks, but here's what we've been doing to keep the peace. So far we've just kept DS's nap and bedtimes the same, I wear DD a lot so if I do need to do more and go in and she's with me it's ok. H also does a lot of the bedtime routine with DS, he always has though since hes at work most of the time and I'm a SAHM so it's always been his time with him. Lately we've been giving him the choice of who will bath him too, me or H, so if he's wanting more time with one of us that's a good fun time for him that he really enjoys with either of us. I admit DS loves having her around and doesn't seem to ever be jealous of her, so that's been a blessing! He's a huge people pleaser lol, and wants to make sure she's happy all the time. He's often the one making sure one of us picks her up if she is down and crying haha.
ETA-I also feel like *so far* keeping DS's routine the same has helped me fall into a bit of a routine with DD, as much as one can have with a newborn anyway.
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