Keep your promises

[theatrepal]

Thanks for the reminder.

[nobb14]

Jul 6, 2015 18:03:57 GMT -5 @bookworm92 said:

Jul 6, 2015 16:37:26 GMT -5 theatrepal said:

Thanks for the reminder.

I wish it wasn't necessary. I wish that I could take all of the hurt from my friends. I don't know if they'll ever be able to recover from this honestly. I posted this after the 4th friend of mine had contact cut for no reason. They decided that "adoption wasn't a big part of their lives". One couple decided to not even tell the child that she was adopted. 

Whoa. That is so sleazy and heartbreaking! I'm very sorry for your friends, BW. I can't imagine raising our child without including their adoption story involved, and I'm very hopeful I'm able to form a relationship with our future birth mother that will make her feel comfortable in our family.

[pinkie]

It's so tough when any promises are broken with anything in life but it's particularly hard when it's something that's so sensitive as adoption. Our agency had us put the plan for openness in writing before the match and both the BM and we signed it along with the Other papers and I think that helps a lot to really talk through expectations and understand it's really an agreement. I'm not sure if all agencies do this but think they should.

Of course things may change somewhat as the relationship grows but if either a BP or AP wants a very open or very closed adoption that really needs to be talked through and agreed upon before a match is made IMO.

[chicago]

That breaks my heart ... I feel like if people truely believed and understood the reason's for open adoption that they wouldn't do that ...

Either way thanks for the reminder ...