Article- forced my oldest to grow up too soon

[anustart1]

I think everyone can chill the eff out on birth order and spacing analysis. Sometimes kids are who they are without siblings being a factor. G was way independent and thrived on it long before Lo was on the scene. And kids LOVE feeling useful. Why do you think so many popular toys are modled On grown up work tasks?

[heelibrarian]

Hmm. It may be because of the gap between my two (3.5 years) but DS was never encouraged to grow up faster, I kind of let him go at his own pace. I can see how having two closer together why you would want (or even need) the first to become more independent.

[musicalsilver]

I do worry a bit about this, but at the same time, I see just how much LO is capable of through all the learning he's done at school. Montessori is all about fostering their independence, and I know that at school he can do things like put his shoes and socks on by himself that he cons me into doing for him at home ;-)

I see having LO help out with #2 as a way to have him be involved in the addition to the family, not as in forcing him to grow up.

It's amazing what these littles are capable of at this age!

[everydayimshuffling]

I don't really like this article either. So she raised a daughter who is responsible, driven, has a great work ethic, is able to care for herself and others, and excels at school. This is a problem why? Maybe I'm just a tiger mom in training or some shit, but I think that list of her daughter's characteristics sounds like a child I would be quite proud to call my child. Isn't the whole point of raising children to give them the skills they need to succeed in life? Birth order can't be helped, it is what it is and it may have some effects on our kids, but fighting it and trying to keep them little seems to bother the author more than her daughter.

Don't get me wrong, I get a little twinge when K starts doing things that are more "grown up" but I'm also crazy proud of her for learning how to do these things on her own. Having said all of that, I'm a driven only child who married a very driven oldest child... So take everything I say with a grain of salt

[megaroo64]

Ummm...

I don't love this article. It makes me feel really guilty that we "made" B grow up sooner than he needed to. Though honestly, I don't know if we would have done anything differently if N was not on the scene. It was crazy how suddenly he was a little human and not a baby when N came home from the hospital.

And I kinda think all of the birth order crap is a little bullshit. I'm sure those characteristics hold true a lot - but in my family, I am the oldest sibling - regardless of the fact that I have an older brother (who acts like he is an only child... despite his FOUR younger siblings).

Anyway - I don't understand what any parent is supposed to do - if you have multiple kids - I guess you are going to be cursed with an oldest sibling.... but those characteristics sounds like they will be able to deal.

[everydayimshuffling]

@theformerwren You always manage to say what I'm thinking but much more eloquently.

[kames12]

Jul 7, 2015 14:12:48 GMT -5 thelorax said:

mcbush can you have low expectations, but still give her lots of stuff? DD now takes her dishes and puts them in the sink every night. I have an expectation that she will complete the task, but I also know she will probably spill everywhere and make a mess.

I only have one kiddo and I still pull out the no hitting/ be nice he/she is only a baby.

+1 on the no hitting, he/she is younger than you for my only child. He is also Mr independent and has been for awhile. D do is his favorite phrase and heaven help you if you try to help