Meet and greet question

[roxy]

I'm pretty sure no one here has any experience, but ya never know. I just got an invite from my SW for a meet and greet with potential kiddos. Keep in mind I'm adopting from a program that has foster kids that are legally free for adoption. I'm socially awkward on a good day. Any one have any experience with this? 

[theholmanherd]

I don't have this exact experience, but whenever I'm dealing with a new group of kids (camp, Sunday school, etc), I always try to break the ice with a fun question. Asking what their favorite movie is could be a good starting point. Maybe ask if they have a favorite character or superhero. That could be a good jumping off point to gain some insight on them off the bat, especially if you follow up with why they like that character so much and add in a bit about something you find appealing about whatever their answer is. I hope this helps.

[spooko]

I haven't had this specific situation, but like PP said, I've met a lot of kids. Smile a lot. Friendly faces make a big difference. Also, IDK if this is possible or not, but kids tend to open up more if it's casually during an activity or game, versus just sitting around a table being interviewed. Unconventional seating or actually doing something low-key with them like a board game or playing on the floor with them (IDK what age group you're in) may work better.

[roxy]

Thank you both that really helps. From what I can tell there will be pizza, some sort of a craft and a hot cocoa bar.

[redandblue]

I don't have any experience here, as we are still in the approval phase, but I like the ideas that PP's gave you. Depending on the age of the children your approach will probably be different. Also try to remember what it might be like for the kiddos. Again depending on age, and what information they have been told, they may also feel nervous. GL! When is this going to happen? I hope you share how it goes.

[roxy]

I got 3 e-mails from my SW all at once about different training and such. Thought it was going to this upcoming weekend, but turns out it won't be until the end of next month.

[theholmanherd]

Jan 25, 2015 20:49:56 GMT -5 roxy said:

I got 3 e-mails from my SW all at once about different training and such. Thought it was going to this upcoming weekend, but turns out it won't be until the end of next month.

Well, at least that gives you more time to prepare. Hopefully it goes smoothly next month.

[Captain Serious]

After you go, can you let us know how it went? I've always wondered about these types of events. Mostly, though, I wonder about the kids and the immense amount of pressure they must be under.

M came to us only after another family disrupted their adoption of him, and he was never told why. He thought it was because of his behavior, and so with us, he was petrified and on his best behavior for a long time. When he did act out, it was clear it was out of fear because he felt he was getting too attached. It took us a long time to break that cycle.

I can only imagine that kids who are being introduced to possible parents feel like this may be their only chance to find a family, and feel rejected if they aren't "chosen." That had for to wreak havoc on their self image.