Bi-weekly Vodka and Hugs 7/21

[sarcaztic10]

Yay! I am actually posting this on time! I feel so accomplished.

How is everyone? Give us all an update of what is going on in your life!


And of course lots of vodka and hugs to get this party started off right! 


 

[rubysi]

sarcaztic10 nice work!

***loss and some not so pleasant info***

As I think many of you know I am back. I am just waiting for the nurse to call back as I think I need another dose of misoprostol. They had me vaginally take it this time but unfortunately it gives me diarrhea and my first trip to the bathroom expelled the medication. This time was much worse than last time. I think I am going to take the rest of the week off from work... Mostly because I hate my job and thus has been a really rough summer with my grandpa passing, my work being stupid, and now this mc.

[sarcaztic10]

Hello everyone!

I had my consult with the RE in regards to my polyp. The RE does want to take it out, I didn't even have to ask for it to be taken out! She does think that the polyp is causing my spotting before AF. For the last few cycles I have started spotting at like 11 dpo, I am glad I have a reason for it now because I was really worried that the progesterone was no longer working (I take 400 mg every day in the 2WW). The RE also says that its location is not the greatest and could not only cause spotting but it could be causing implantation issues. She said the polyp is situated in a way that blocks off that spot for implantation and then rubs against the other side of my ute blocking the spot on the the other side as well and thus basically creating a road block across my ute so no egg can implant below it either. Fuck this polyp... that how I feel.

The RE says that we can do IUI #3 with injects the cycle after my hysteroscopy. She also said she might suggest we just continue with a few more IUI's after that just because this polyp might very well be the reason why I didn't get PG with the last 2 IUI's what with it forming a road block for any eggs to implant.

Other than all that I am looking forward to getting this show on the road. I have to call tomorrow to schedule the hysteroscopy tentatively for 7/29.

[sarcaztic10]

rubysi Oh honey, I am sending you so many (((Hugs))). I am so sorry you have to take another dose of the medicine. Taking the week off sounds like a good thing to do. Know that we are here for you and we are all thinking of you and sending you so much love.

[elliecat17]

rubysi So many many hugs to you. I wish i do more than just write words or post gifs. Take the week off. Focus on yourself.

AFM: I have an appointment with the RE on 8/17. I'm so nervous!!! I have no idea what to expect, and I have heard that he can be a bit mean at times.
I have been struggling so much with my weight. It's this crazy swing through my cycle. I lost 8#'s last month, and gained them all back plus 2 right at the end of my 2WW. Guess I need to add in MORE exercise.
I will also be asking about the baby aspirin affecting my temperature, and the progesterone not really lengthening my LP. However I am hoping that he has some ideas, and does some of the more intensive testing.

NCALR: H moved our chickens outside finally because they are too big to be in my mud room anymore. Out of the 8 chicks we got only 1 is a rooster!! I keep hoping H gets a job in NY. I really think I would enjoy that job there... But I'm also nervous to leave here. We own our house and are slowly starting to get ahead in life. Now that the big shows are over I can get back to my crafting and my garden. However I have been asked to sing some solos for a fundraiser at the historical society. Someone I was singing with also offered to teach me the basics of the organ for free!!!

[sarcaztic10]

elliecat17 I am keeping my FX that your H gets a job in NY! I am also hoping that the RE is not mean to you... Let us know how it goes!

[menrandes]

sarcaztic10, fuck that polyp! I'm glad to hear that it will be taken out. FX that removing it will make things better!!

rubysi, So much love and **hugs** to you lady. I think taking the week seems like the right decision. Relax if you can.

elliecat17, I've got my FX that your RE appointment will go well and that NY will work out for you!

heartbot, big **hugs** FX that the best case scenario happens for you. I'm hoping that you feel better soon.

So my chart was a big let down this cycle. We had just started talking about how it's too much to keep trying and where will we go from here and then I had a really nice looking chart. It fooled me. I took tests even though my husband didn't want me to. He said to go ahead and take the test, but that he had zero hopes of it being positive. He was right. I don't know. I don't want to give up, but I've also pretty much lost hope of succeeding.
We leave for Hawaii in less than two weeks, thank goodness. I can't wait to get away.

[sarcaztic10]

heartbot Ugh, I am so sorry about the migraine and the news. I am keeping everything crossed that you get the best case scenario sooner rather than later.

menrandes I was lurking your chart and I was hoping something would come of it but I understand all too well that pretty charts don't always have good results. (((Hugs))) Yay for Hawaii!!

[lizblue]

Thanks for the check in sarcaztic10. I'm sorry to hear you need the hysteroscopy, but glad that you have a plan. FX this helps.

rubysi, you know how much I care about you. I wanted so badly for you to get different news yesterday. Take good and gentle care of yourself and know that I am always here for you to vent/drink/curse/cry with. We all are. There are no other words.

elliecat17, GL with the RE. I always say I don't need my doctor to be my friend, I just need him/her to be super fucking smart and get the job done. Keep us posted. Where (generally) in NY do you want to move to? I grew up downstate and went to school upstate, and have pretty much lived every place in between.

heartbot, I'm sorry it's been a shitty couple of weeks. I really hope it turns around for you, and in the meantime, make sure to treat yourself well and self medicate with the booze of your choice. Vodhugs to you.

menrandes, I'm sorry about the cycle, but am super excited for your trip! That sounds amazing. Have so much fun.

AFM, we are finally done with our adoption profile! Holy shit it was harder than I thought it would be. Our social worker got back to us right away with her feedback and I am going to finalize it tonight. The last step is filling out our key of situations that we are comfortable with (i.e. race of child, prenatal drug exposure, medical history of birthparents, etc.) This process has made me look at parenthood with completely different eyes. I've had to think about things I never thought I would, and it's been mostly insightful and inspiring, but also sometimes sad. This process is not for the weak, and I keep reminding myself that i am brave and strong and that the outcome of this will be very rich and meaningful.

Next up: excruciating waiting!

Love you ladies. Thanks for being here.

[cavewmn]

sarcaztic10, FX removing the polyp fixes everything! It sucks you are having to deal with it in the first place and that this could be why you didn't get PG.

rubysi, *Big Hugs* I am sorry you are having to go through this and hope with the rest of the week off you can focus on yourself.

elliecat17, I hope your RE is nice to you. That would be awesome if your husband finds a job in NY soon! It's exciting that you will be learning the basics of the organ for free! Organs are so awesome and I wish I could learn to play them.

heartbot, That sucks you had to deal with the migraine after all of this. I hope the weird stuff from it goes away soon. FX that somehow fertilized eggs will be drawn to the left side of your ute.

menrandes, I'm sorry your chart fucked with you. Hoping you have a ton of fun in Hawaii and much relaxing!

AFM: I think Dh's patches are starting to work. He is feeling more rested in the morning and not dragging a lot during the day. Of course finding 8 spots with no bone and hair is hard to do.
We know the SA place got his paperwork there but now we are waiting for the referral to get there before they can make his appointment.
FX his SA comes back normal and the getting him testosterone was the answer all a long.

This months cycle length was on the normal side! But I think my body was being a drama queen and causing pain making me fear another ectopic was happening.
I decided to start getting healthier. Since my loss I have gained over 40 pounds.

Sorry if my post is a bit jumbled my brain is scattered more than usual. lol

[sarcaztic10]

cavewmn Yay for the patches starting to work and for your cycle length being more normal! I will be keeping my FX that YH has a stellar SA.

[elliecat17]

cavewmn: I too love the organ. in fact I taught myself to read music and play piano was I was 8 so that one day I could play the organ. LOL

lizblue and menrandes that is true, and I don't want the Dr. to be my friend, but I certainly don't want to be belittled. I have heard that he can just be very abrupt. The school that will hopefully hire me is in Tuckahoe. So anywhere in the area near there. I personally would rather cross the border into CT.

heartbot My MIL used to work with him in L&D. She said he was smart, and was always trying things ahead of his time, but that he also had the worst bedside manner. Let's hope that the years have softened him.

[therealbug]

rubysi, so many ((((hugs))). I think the week off is a great idea.

sarcaztic10, I'm glad the doctor is on board with taking the polyp out and that she is hopeful that you can still do the IUI route afterwards. Ugh stupid polyp.

elliecat17, I hope the RE is not mean We have enough stresses to worry about in this process and do not need mean doctors on top of it. FX for your H and the job!

heartbot, lots of (((hugs))) lady. I think PetSquirrel has scarring issues she has to deal with also. I'm glad your RE is addressing the MTHFR mutation issue even if he does not think it is the issue. My RE is really proactive on that front and put me on prescription folate because of my one copy.

menrandes, just big ((((hugs)))). I'm so sorry lady. Hope sucks. It really does. Your Hawaiin vacation sounds like it is coming at the perfect time. Enjoy and relax.

lizblue, excruciating waiting is the best! Oh, no wait . . . I'm so happy you got feedback on your profile so quickly! FX that everything moves smoothly and quickly and that you and your H were on the same page for your wants, etc.

cavewmn, yay! I'm glad your H is feeling better. FX for a great SA.

AFM, we decided to go forward on the Fast Track embryo list. The final push was the nurse confirming for us that they consider both lists to be equal in success rates. It came down to going with profiles of available embryos or waiting to see if a "perfect" profile would show up in 8 or so months. Since there were several profiles we liked and the "negatives" were not negatives to us, we decided to move forward now.

We submitted our short list. We are okay with mixing and our top to choices are single embryos from different donors. Mr. Bug and I agreed on our top 4 choices but his list matched to mine like this: 2, 1, 4, 3. The top two didn't really matter since they are single embryos and we know they will thaw both. The issue comes down to whether one or both of those don't thaw well - then #3 is likely where all of the embryos would come from. My #3 was a great profile and would have been our clear #1 except for bio mom being 38. Mr. Bug was not worried about the age at first (which is why it made our short list) but I showed him a chart on trisomy risk by age and it freaked him out enough to downgrade it to a spot on the list where it is not likely to be picked. It was tough and there was a lot of soul searching on what is really important to each of us and what isn't.

Next week is my SIS and I (hopefully) got all my blood work done last night.

On the non-CAL front: we get our bikes this weekend! We already are checking out different greenways and places we can go for rides. They are cruisers so we just plan on slowely peddling around

[elliecat17]

therealbug Yay for a plan!!! Also the bikes sound like lots of fun! I had a cruiser growing up, and loved the simplicity of it.

cavewmn I'm glad the patch is helping. Finding 8 spots must be crazy hard. I thought about the likelihood of finding 8 on my H and gave up after 2. ALso I'm glad your cycle is getting back to a more normal thing.

lizblue I'm glad your adoption profile is done! I'm excited for you! I hope you don't have to wait horribly long.

menrandes Yay! I'm glad Hawaii worked out! I'm sorry about your chart and cycle though. ((hugs))

heartbot ((hugs)) I'm sorry about the anesthesia, that's a bit weird for it to affect for so long. Also the news about the scarring is not great, but at least you know. Are they going to try to remove any of it, or just leave it be?

sarcaztic10 evict that polyp! Sorry for the news, but at least you and the RE are on the same page! FX for the next IUI!!!

[sarcaztic10]

lizblue Yay for being done with your adoption profile!! I am keeping everything crossed for you!

therealbug I am so glad you have a plan that you can move forward with a little more quickly. Did you find out if you can stay on the "Perfect embryo" list after the transfer of the less perfect embryos?

Yay for bikes! H and I just got some new bikes the other week. I got a cute little cream colored cruiser and he got a mountain bike. There is a really nice greenway that travels along side the Stones River that we have been on.

[cavewmn]

lizblue, That is awesome you are done with your profile! FX you don't have a crazy long wait!

therealbug, It is crazy how you knock almost a year off just by changing lists.

[4furrypaws]

Hey Loves...

sarcaztic10, Hope the polyp removal is quick and heals quickly hun!

rubysi, I just want to wrap my arms around you sweetie. ((hugs))

elliecat17, FX your H can find something in NY!! I just added a fourth gym day to my schedule...hope you can get schedule going that works for you!!

heartbot, ((Hugs)) hun...rest yourself.

menrandes, Love hun...I'm sure having the house 'guests' don't help with all the feels. I am jealous of your HI trip! You guys will have such a great time!!

lizblue, EEEEEEEE!!!! This is getting for REALS lady!!!!!

cavewmn, FX the patches are working! And yay for getting healthier!!

therealbug, This is happening so fast!!! I'm so excited for you lady!!!

AFM...nothing new...second cycle on BCP. Printed out info and stats for the fertility clinics in the area for H to read over. For me it's between two of them...one snegde and racheleigh went to and one that is associated with our women's hospital in town. We'll see.

Lots and lots of love to you all! xo

[sarcaztic10]

4furrypaws I hope that you can choose a fertility clinic and RE that you will both be happy with! Good luck!

[cavewmn]

4furrypaws, FX you end up happy with which ever one you decide to go with.

[rubysi]

sarcaztic10,rubysi,elliecat17,heartbot,menrandes,lizblue,cavewmn,therealbug,4furrypaws,

I want to be a better bumpie and tag you all individually but I am not thinking great right now. Thank you for all of the hugs. And the one lesson I learned from labyrinth is life isn't fair


But that's the way it is...

[cavewmn]

rubysi, Sadly very true. And now this weekend I will need to watch that movie and maybe Dark Crystal.

[lizblue]

Life is not fair. To risk sounding like a petulant child, I think this is what I've been most mad about for the last two years. I strive not to be bitter, but IF and loss has really taken its toll on me and I know I won't be the same.

The one thing that brings me some shred of comfort is that I think life is doing this to all of us over time- it's what life does to all the grown ups. And it's up to us to navigate it and not turn into hardened jaded people. I'm trying - I think we all are.

And when we can't try anymore ...vodka.

More ((hugs)) rubysi

[sarcaztic10]

@eliida I am so freaking jealous!!! I want to go to Harry Potter World!!! I hope your Hysteroscopy is easy and recovery is quick! Apparently we should take some Colace beforehand...

[cavewmn]

@eliida, I hope you hysteroscopy goes well and I am sssooo jealous of your Harry Potter trip!!!

[4furrypaws]

lizblue

A-Fucking-Men Sister!

I lurve you. xo

[4furrypaws]

rubysi Just more hugs and love my sweet.

@eliida GL Tues! And have fun at HPW!!

[skategirl128]

Big hugs rubysi! I'm so sorry lovie!

Glad you have a plan sarcaztic10!

elliecat17 good luck at your re visit.

heartbot big hugs I'm sorry you've had such a rough few weeks.

menrandes have so much fun in Hawaii! I'm so jealous!

lizblue yay for finishing your profile! So exciting!!

cavewmn glad yh's patches are working.

therealbug good luck! And yay for bikes!

4furrypaws good luck picking a clinic!

@eliida good luck with your hysteroscopy! Have fun at Harry Potter world!!