TTCAL check in- anyone interested? *Update in OP*

[rablissful]

I know there's a lot of ladies here who have gone through losses but don't participate on CAL or jump between the two boards. I was wondering if people would be interested in a weekly check-in to see how we're all doing and get support from each other since TTCAL can be such a mind fuck.

If you are interested and have suggestions on format, feel free to express them.

If nobody is interested, no big deal, just thought I'd suggest it.

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So it seems like here is a lot of interest in this!

Check-in will be on Tuesdays, and run all week (so you can keep coming back and updating). I'll write up something as an intro explaining what the check-in is for the first one, and after that anybody can post it... Like WTDS.

Everyone who has had a loss will be welcome, whether that be a miscarriage, still birth, or child loss.

The format will be as follows, unless anyone wants to change anything or had any other suggestions:

How are you doing?

Status (TTA, TTC, Benched)

Diagnosis (if applicable)

Updates/questions

Debbie downer (a place to vent)

GTKY:


Thanks everyone for the great feedback! I hope this provides a much needed area of support on GKU!

[notagoddess]

I would be interested. I lurk at CAL occasionally but I haven't made the leap to posting. My loss is pretty much always on my mind when thinking about anything TTC-related. It would be nice to have a space to share with others who have had that experience as well, without having to follow 2 boards.

[Deleted]

I'm interested! I was actually thinking about this last week.

[rablissful]

Aug 5, 2015 14:59:04 GMT -5 @led said:

I'm interested! I was actually thinking about this last week.

Great minds

[kayladawn91]

I would be interested. I haven't made the leap to posting on CAL but my loss weighs heavy on me most days. I would love a place to connect with others in my position.

[rablissful]

Anyone have any ideas on format? I was thinking once a week, Monday would be an obvious choice but there are a lot of weeklies stated that day.

I don't necessarily want tags for everyone because there are some days you just don't want to be reminded. That said, if people want tags I'm all for keeping that organized. If we go tags, do we want to go so far as loss dates or include that in the format?

I was thinking:
How are you doing?

Updates (either ttcal or nttcal)?

How is YH/SO doing?

What is one nice thing you have done for yourself lately?

GTKY:

[Deleted]

As for format, we could include a general status (TTC, TTA, testing, etc.), comments/questions, diagnosis, Debbie Downer (because let's be honest, we all need to just be sad/bitter/whatever sometimes),

I don't know. That's all I've got.

[rablissful]

Aug 5, 2015 15:20:09 GMT -5 @led said:

As for format, we could include a general status (TTC, TTA, testing, etc.), comments/questions, diagnosis, Debbie Downer (because let's be honest, we all need to just be sad/bitter/whatever sometimes),

I don't know. That's all I've got.

That sounds great as well!

[shadesofgold]

Thanks for suggesting this, rablissful. I came back to GKU after my loss because it was where the familiar faces were. I don't spend a lot of time on CAL because, well, I don't know them. That said, my loss is a big part of my TCC experience and I'd appreciate the space to express that more explicitly than the TWW/WTO threads. I would participate in a check-in.

I like the general format of 1) how are you, 2) status updates/diagnosis. I also like @led's suggestion of including a Debbie Downer question. I need that. I think the "one nice thing" and "how is your SO" seem like great starter GTKY questions rather than weekly check-in Qs.

[mosdub]

I'll be rocking WTDS for a while, but when I'm ready and able I'd like to join in on a TTCAL check-in

[rablissful]

Aug 5, 2015 15:32:04 GMT -5 mosdub said:

I'll be rocking WTDS for a while, but when I'm ready and able I'd like to join in on a TTCAL check-in

I think we'll be having a status question, so even if you're TTA you can join us, especially if you need to vent!

[steveo]

I'd participate (my loss was of my 15 month old, but it is affecting this entire TTC process for me in so many different ways). I'd understand if you want to keep it to MC / stillbirth, however...either way

[Deleted]

Aug 5, 2015 15:36:06 GMT -5 steveo said:

I'd participate (my loss was of my 15 month old, but it is affecting this entire TTC process for me in so many different ways). I'd understand if you want to keep it to MC / stillbirth, however...either way

No reason to exclude.

[rablissful]

Ok so general format:

How are you doing?

Status (TTA, TTC, Benched)*

Diagnosis (if applicable)

Questions/comments Updates/questions

Debbie downer (a place to vent)

GTKY:

*I know TTA/benched could be the same thing. I consider benched more due to doctor's orders versus TTA for personal reasons.

Edited for shadesofgold suggestion

[rablissful]

Aug 5, 2015 15:36:06 GMT -5 steveo said:

I'd participate (my loss was of my 15 month old, but it is affecting this entire TTC process for me in so many different ways). I'd understand if you want to keep it to MC / stillbirth, however...either way

You can definitely join us. A loss is a loss, whether it be before or after birth.

[shadesofgold]

Aug 5, 2015 15:36:06 GMT -5 steveo said:

I'd participate (my loss was of my 15 month old, but it is affecting this entire TTC process for me in so many different ways). I'd understand if you want to keep it to MC / stillbirth, however...either way

I think I speak for everyone that we would NOT exclude any loss.

[steveo]

Thanks team

[shadesofgold]

Aug 5, 2015 15:39:19 GMT -5 rablissful said:

Ok so general format:

How are you doing?

Status (TTA, TTC, Benched)

Diagnosis (if applicable)

Questions/comments

Debbie downer (a place to vent)

GTKY:

*I know TTA/benched could be the same thing. I consider benched more due to doctor's orders versus TTA for personal reasons.

Can we change the Questions/comments to updates/questions? I can't think of what a comment would be in this context, exactly. And as a check-in, I think we need an explicit place to share what's new or happening this week.

[rablissful]

Aug 5, 2015 15:43:02 GMT -5 shadesofgold said:

Aug 5, 2015 15:39:19 GMT -5 rablissful said:

Ok so general format:

How are you doing?

Status (TTA, TTC, Benched)

Diagnosis (if applicable)

Questions/comments

Debbie downer (a place to vent)

GTKY:

*I know TTA/benched could be the same thing. I consider benched more due to doctor's orders versus TTA for personal reasons.

Can we change the Questions/comments to updates/questions? I can't think of what a comment would be in this context, exactly. And as a check-in, I think we need an explicit place to share what's new or happening this week.

Definitely!

[hydrangea1019]

I'm 100% in. I've posted and been involved in CAL, but then I fall off and stop. I got so much support from everyone here that I get kind of overwhelmed going back and forth.

[kayladawn91]

Looks good rablissful! Thanks for taking charge of this!

[rablissful]

What day do we want to post? Should we just stick to Monday?

[Deleted]

Aug 5, 2015 15:58:40 GMT -5 rablissful said:

What day do we want to post? Should we just stick to Monday?

Do we want it to be a once a week post or a post that just gets posted in all week long?

I think if it's somewhere we can come to vent/update throughout the week, then Monday is great. But if we want to make it a one day a week thing then we should pick a day other than Monday since there are already so many other regular posts on Mondays. 

[rablissful]

Aug 5, 2015 16:01:40 GMT -5 @led said:

Aug 5, 2015 15:58:40 GMT -5 rablissful said:

What day do we want to post? Should we just stick to Monday?

Do we want it to be a once a week post or a post that just gets posted in all week long?

I think if it's somewhere we can come to vent/update throughout the week, then Monday is great. But if we want to make it a one day a week thing then we should pick a day other than Monday since there are already so many other regular posts on Mondays. 

I was thinking a weekly check in, but people can keep coming in IF they want to vent even if they already checked in. Such as if I posted and checked in Monday then ran into a huge trigger Thursday I would come back and vent.

But we can do Tuesday or Wednesday instead of Monday, or Sunday-Sunday

[shadesofgold]

I like Tuesdays or Wednesdays for a check-in.

[mosdub]

Aug 5, 2015 15:33:33 GMT -5 rablissful said:

Aug 5, 2015 15:32:04 GMT -5 mosdub said:

I'll be rocking WTDS for a while, but when I'm ready and able I'd like to join in on a TTCAL check-in

I think we'll be having a status question, so even if you're TTA you can join us, especially if you need to vent!

Yay!  I would like that  

On the topic (sort-of)  I just went and bought a new BBT at the pharmacy and a woman in the aisle told me which one worked best for her and the app she uses (fertility friend).  I said yeah, I use that too.  She was nice but it was also kind of sad/uncomfortable for some unplaceable reason.  Maybe because I'm only temping to see if I am ovulating yet after the loss and my long-ass-hcg-drop...not to try and GKU.  Meh.  

[mosdub]

P.S. I like the "debbie downer" part of the check-in because I kind of just did that. Eek, sorry guys.

Also agree with Tues/Thurs.

But again, I may stay away from TTCAL check-in until I even know how long I'm benched.

[Deleted]

Aug 5, 2015 16:09:45 GMT -5 mosdub said:

Aug 5, 2015 15:33:33 GMT -5 rablissful said:

I think we'll be having a status question, so even if you're TTA you can join us, especially if you need to vent!

Yay!  I would like that  

On the topic (sort-of)  I just went and bought a new BBT at the pharmacy and a woman in the aisle told me which one worked best for her and the app she uses (fertility friend).  I said yeah, I use that too.  She was nice but it was also kind of sad/uncomfortable for some unplaceable reason.  Maybe because I'm only temping to see if I am ovulating yet after the loss and my long-ass-hcg-drop...not to try and GKU.  Meh.  

Sometimes the most mundane things can be difficult. *hugs*

[rablissful]

Aug 5, 2015 16:12:18 GMT -5 mosdub said:

P.S. I like the "debbie downer" part of the check-in because I kind of just did that. Eek, sorry guys.

Also agree with Tues/Thurs.

But again, I may stay away from TTCAL check-in until I even know how long I'm benched.

Big hugs lady.

I didn't suggest Thursday or Friday due to uo/fffc. Tuesday/Wednesday only has grad check in.

[pbandj714]

Aug 5, 2015 14:58:03 GMT -5 notagoddess said:

I would be interested. I lurk at CAL occasionally but I haven't made the leap to posting. My loss is pretty much always on my mind when thinking about anything TTC-related. It would be nice to have a space to share with others who have had that experience as well, without having to follow 2 boards.

My feelings exactly.

I'd be interested!