Family Rants

[Widget123]

We haven't done any of these in a while.  Do you have any family rants you want to share?

[Widget123]

DH told me his parents were making comments to him about our credit card bills. We don't leave that kind of stuff lying around so that means they must have been doing some serious rummaging around when they were supposed to be babysitting our kids. I almost feel like I need to password protect my electronic devices now so they don't go reading my email.

[ravinraven216]

We stayed overnight at DH's parents' house (which makes me feel really poor, but I digress) this weekend. They bought their house about a year ago. My FIL had a stroke a few years ago that was relatively minor, but forced him to retire. He's has trouble making decisions and he agonizes over the most minuscule details. They recently had shelves installed in the laundry room and he fussed over their height to no end. They don't have curtains in any room because he can't decide what color to go with. Their deck needs finished before another brutal Ohio winter and he can't commit to a deck stain - they've been thinking about it since May. My MIL, not wanting to upset him, defers to him almost entirely. I'm generally non-confrontational myself, but if shit really needs to get done I step up and do it. I feel incensed on her behalf. He gets his way all the time it seems and nothing is done without his approval.

I know they have a different dynamic than DH and I, but it's hard to deal with sometimes.

[billyhorrible]

My inlaws suck. Which is, whatever, but they are constantly a disappointment to my DH. My SIL, niece and nephew haven't been to visit us in about 8 years. My BIL came down for LBB's first birthday. They basically expect us to come up and visit them, which we always do, using up all our vacation time. BIL gave DH grief about not coming up for Easter, even though he couldn't because he needed the vacation days for when BH was born.

They told us they couldn't come visit to meet the new baby, because they were using their vacation time to go to Italy. BIL just quit his job and has some time to kill before starting his new one, so he's taking the family camping in Yosemite. I'm just as happy not to spend time with them, but I feel bad for DH that they are so obvious about showing him how not important he is to them.

[missjenniebean]

Dont even get me started. Ha.

[Bluedaisy]

My MIL drives me crazy...she was here for a week and did nothing but sit and knit. I swear she might have held baby five times but then when they are leaving makes a huge frigging show of bawling all the way to the airport and now bawls every time my husband calls her. I swear it's just a giant guilt trip on my husband for moving so far away and that she doesn't actually care about little one.

[musicfrk2002]

I don't have any yet (that I can think of right now) but we have a family reunion to go to next weekend, so I'm sure I will have something then...it is with my dad's whole side of the family and only one aunt and uncle have met J.

[erbear]

My only issues have been a lack of support for breastfeeding. Mil made a comment last time she was here about LO "not getting enough" to eat which was why she (LO) ate all the time and my sister told me on saturday I should supplement while at parties and such so everyone can see the baby instead of me feeding her. Well, no.

[wormgerm]

MIL makes a big fuss about finding me somewhere private to nurse. Like, hide behind this big tree and I'll stand here to block you. Or yesterday at a family reunion I had nursed him 4 times already totally discreetly. He was hungry again. I was standing facing away from everyone to let my boob out of my bra under my shirt and she came over and started dragging my chair away to somewhere "more private" so I could be "more comfortable"! I had been sitting chatting with my husband, BIL, and his gf while facing away from the rest of the crowd. I was totally comfortable and didn't want to be isolated all day. This kid eats often and for long sessions so it would have been a long shitty day of me sitting my myself. It's bizarre.

Also her comments that baby "wants a hamburger" or "wants ice cream" any time he is hungry and we are eating are sooooo annoying. He's 8 weeks old. It isn't funny and it's the same joke every time. He wants mama milk and comfort and to be a baby.

[turtletyme]

My MIL is munchausen or something. She can only relate to people if they are sick. She was very disappointed that I didn't qualify as a high risk pregnancy and wanted me to get a second opinion. Now, with the baby, she is convinced she is allergic to her formula or has "stomach cramps" any time she cries, fusses or even coos. It's literally the only thing she wants to talk about re: baby and I spend my whole life shutting that shit down.

Oh, then I put some peanut m&ms out during their visit yesterday and she immediately had to say how peanuts are the worst thing you can eat, because they get mold and are inflammatory. Ok.

[Flick]

My aunt got married on Saturday and had an open bar. I got to cut loose a little and finally enjoy turning 21 so the baby went back to my parents house with SO. I went with them for a minute to set up the pack and play before heading back. Right as I was leaving my dad made a comment, something like 'you're really just going to leave your baby?' Uh yeah, she's with her father. Why is it that in order to be a 'good dad' all you have to do is be around every now and again but to be considered a 'good mom' you have to give up any semblance of a social life, hold your baby all the time, bring the baby to see the family because they won't come to you, but god forbid you do that too often because then you're just asking to get your baby sick. Also you deserve a night out but don't take anyone up on their offer to watch the baby or you're just asking to be talked badly about.


I guess I have a lot of rage. The double standards of parenthood are appalling.

[clbehenna]

Aug 10, 2015 7:05:15 GMT -5 budders said:

I can't even start about my MIL because I could fill 5 pages of this thread. No issues with anyone else.

I'm with ya! My in-laws were on vacation for the past week, and it was so nice not to have to see them. They came back last night...so it's inevitable we will see them at some point today. That, along with my lack of sleep, is making me crabby.

[baytosa2013]

Geez I really feel for some of you ladies on the family/in law front. I don't really have any crazy complaints as everyone has been pretty good so far. The only slightly annoying thing is MIL saying things like "she looks like grandma" and "she needs her grammy"...mkay.

[tiffbot]

Oh man, I know I am lucky in my family. Sometimes the ILs might say little things here and there but I'm getting better at letting things go that way.

But @freckleface, I just wanted to say hugs and I'm sorry. I became a SAHM at 27 and have zero regrets. You just do what you need to do!

[hannahl201477]

My in laws suck!! My MIL is constantly making remarks that she doesn't get to see baby enough. We are NOT stopping her. She makes these comments yet she cooks dinner for my brother in laws family constantly and doesn't invite us. Bends over backwards for them and our nephew but could care less about us. Took her two weeks to tell me if she wanted any of our sons newborn pictures! It's one thing to exclude us but she WILL NOT do it to our son. Momma bear will come out and it won't be pretty!

[Bluedaisy]

Aug 10, 2015 8:22:11 GMT -5 @imapenguin said:

Aug 10, 2015 8:07:52 GMT -5 turtletyme said:

My MIL is munchausen or something. She can only relate to people if they are sick. She was very disappointed that I didn't qualify as a high risk pregnancy and wanted me to get a second opinion. Now, with the baby, she is convinced she is allergic to her formula or has "stomach cramps" any time she cries, fusses or even coos. It's literally the only thing she wants to talk about re: baby and I spend my whole life shutting that shit down.

Oh, then I put some peanut m&ms out during their visit yesterday and she immediately had to say how peanuts are the worst thing you can eat, because they get mold and are inflammatory. Ok.

My MIL does this too. DD usually only cries when she's over tired and needs to be put down for a nap but MIL always says its gas or a stomach ache. MIL is physically unable to leave a crying baby alone, but DD gets to a point where holding and bouncing just pisses her off more. Last time MIL was here I had to stay in the baby's room with the door locked so she could go to sleep without being bothered. She was then grumpy because I wasn't letting her bond with her granddaughter. Keeping her awake when she needs to sleep is not bonding!

+1 for MIL thinking that every time LO cries it's gas.  

[ombradellarosa]

So I usually get along well with DH's parents and one sister and the other sister and his brother kind of get on my nerves. Now though I am appreciating his other sister more and his parents are driving me bonkers! I announced on Facebook that we didn't want pictures of our child online and his entire freaking family just had a mass breakdown over it and his dad said not to badger me and to let me respond when I was ready because I was about to have a baby and didn't need the stress, but guess what he thought was appropriate to bring up the day after I gave birth while visiting us in the hospital?

Then today he got all pissy with me because we didn't give them more notice for DD's baby blessing. That's a whole thing but basically they came out to be here when she was almost due, wanted me to have her blessing while they were here but I decided I didn't feel comfortable taking her out in public at two weeks (and then she was a week late on top of that) so instead of staying as long as they said they could they left two days after she was born. They said we'd probably see them again in about a year when they come out for my nephew's baptism. Now they're all mad we didn't give them enough notice to come out for the blessing. They gave NO indication that they wanted to come or even could come back across the country two months later. And he's getting on me about being prudent and courteous and they're so busy, these are all the things they're doing blah blah blah and I'm just like Seriously?! You are NOT going to put this on me. We just moved the date because I found out last minute my brother will be here before he goes to Germany for a year and he can be a part of the blessing. Not that I would tell my ILs this but it's way more important to me to have my brother involved than it is for my husband to have his parents here, besides which they could have chosen to come for the blessing instead but they came to my SIL's graduation (and later pretended that was an incidental of being here for the baby being born...yeah right then why were you here a week before my due date) I've always liked my ILs but lately it's one thing after another and I am just getting completely done with them.