Male or Female OB (or Midwife)

[tootsie]

So for the first time in my life I will be seeing a male OB.  Logically I know there's nothing to be worried about, because hello, they're medical professionals! Still, I've got some nerves and I'm sure I'll have some spectacular nervous sweats.

So tell me, is your OB male or female?

Any anecdotes to share on the pros of either one?

(I didn't want to leave those with midwives out, although I've never heard of a male midwife...)

[housecarder]

Mine is female but I have had a male in the past. I found that my male OB was actually gentler, like he didn't want to hurt me, where as my female OB wasn't rough per se just more like "well I've got the same parts so I know how his feels".

[lostinfaith225]

I have a female. Always have. There is one male in the practice.

I am now ok with either after ds. My resident at delivery was a male.

[Ray]

The OB I went to see while TTC was male. We didn't end up proceeding with any testing more just consultations so that's not much help. He seemed really nice though. The RN that will be following me until later in my pregnancy is also male. He is really excellent. He knows that I'm really "into" this "TTC/pregnancy stuff" lol so he talks to me as if I already have an idea of whats going on and trusts me to ask if I'm not. He has performed Pap tests before and it really wasn't a big deal. It's all business.

Basically as long as you like and feel comfortable with the person you're with I don't see any issues.

[madamewaffles]

My RE is male and my first OB was male. It was different for me since I had only had female physicians in my nether regions up until that time but honestly, I am with housecarder. I feel like the males were more gentle on my body. My new OB will be female. I chose her because she took an active interest in my situation (IF and physical disability) and seems super committed to making this a positive experience for me. At the end of the day, so many docs, nurses, and techs have seen my bajingo now that it doesn't phase me anymore! I hope you like your OB!

[tootsie]

Nov 13, 2015 10:57:19 GMT -5 housecarder said:

Mine is female but I have had a male in the past. I found that my male OB was actually gentler, like he didn't want to hurt me, where as my female OB wasn't rough per se just more like "well I've got the same parts so I know how his feels".

I have heard this many times before.  I hope I experience this as well lol

[tootsie]

Nov 13, 2015 11:04:17 GMT -5 madamewaffles said:

My RE is male and my first OB was male. It was different for me since I had only had female physicians in my nether regions up until that time but honestly, I am with housecarder. I feel like the males were more gentle on my body. My new OB will be female. I chose her because she took an active interest in my situation (IF and physical disability) and seems super committed to making this a positive experience for me. At the end of the day, so many docs, nurses, and techs have seen my bajingo now that it doesn't phase me anymore! I hope you like your OB!

See one bajingo, see them all

Thanks for sharing, I hope I like him too.  Your OB sounds great, I hope you have a good experience with her.

[TnT10]

I have a female OB and always have EXCEPT for when I was on the Depo shot; the only doctor in town that offered it at the time was male. I didn't feel comfortable with him but he wasn't exactly the friendliest person I've ever meant either.

To piggyback off of this topic, there was a news story that came out last week in our area about a male OB that had "relationships" with 10+ patients. They were all consentual but it is still really unprofessional that it happened inside of the practice. He was a part of the practice that I currently go to (it is the largest in the area) but he obviously isn't anymore. I didn't think it was really professional of the local media to blast him all over the place because they were consentual patients, but I guess that's what the media does at times!

[beebe918]

I have a female midwife, she was on vacation for 2 weeks towards the end of my last pregnancy and I saw a male ob in the same practice. I LOVED him, like pps have said he was so much gentler and my midwife was not even willing to talk about induction until 22 weeks and said I didn't need an ultrasound to make sure the baby wasn't too big. The male on let me get an ultrasound at 40 weeks and let me be induced at 41 weeks. My midwife ended up delivering me but the male ob came at the end bc of complications. I will say I believe the female was so much more helpful during delivery, she basically slapped me into shape when I was refusing to push, I feel like the male might have handled me with kid gloves.

[tootsie]

Nov 13, 2015 11:42:40 GMT -5 beebe918 said:

I have a female midwife, she was on vacation for 2 weeks towards the end of my last pregnancy and I saw a male ob in the same practice. I LOVED him, like pps have said he was so much gentler and my midwife was not even willing to talk about induction until 22 weeks and said I didn't need an ultrasound to make sure the baby wasn't too big. The male on let me get an ultrasound at 40 weeks and let me be induced at 41 weeks. My midwife ended up delivering me but the male ob came at the end bc of complications. I will say I believe the female was so much more helpful during delivery, she basically slapped me into shape when I was refusing to push, I feel like the male might have handled me with kid gloves.

Are you going to see the midwife or the OB for this pregnancy?

I wish my practice had a midwife.  I used a stand-alone birth center with my DD and I loved my midwife.  We moved though, and there are no options I trust in my new area.

[tootsie]

Nov 13, 2015 11:29:37 GMT -5 TnT10 said:

I have a female OB and always have EXCEPT for when I was on the Depo shot; the only doctor in town that offered it at the time was male. I didn't feel comfortable with him but he wasn't exactly the friendliest person I've ever meant either.

To piggyback off of this topic, there was a news story that came out last week in our area about a male OB that had "relationships" with 10+ patients. They were all consentual but it is still really unprofessional that it happened inside of the practice. He was a part of the practice that I currently go to (it is the largest in the area) but he obviously isn't anymore. I didn't think it was really professional of the local media to blast him all over the place because they were consentual patients, but I guess that's what the media does at times!

Whoa that's crazy! I vaguely remember hearing a snippet about that on the news.  Did they release the names of the patients involved?

[mcktymck]

I am seeing a female doctor, mainly because she was the one with the most availability, and there is only one male doctor in the practice. I prefer a female anyways though, for some reason the thought of another man down there besides my husband weirds me out, even though I know he would just be doing his job. I feel more comfortable around women because I feel like they are more likely to know what I am going through and can relate to me the best.

[icaughtfire]

My OB when I was pregnant with my daughter was male & I loved him, but he unfortunately passed away. I'm set to see a female OB for my first appointment, and if I like her I'll just stick with her. I don't truly have a preference. It's a bit awkward having a male when they start doing cervical checks..but a lady's hand in my vagina is also awkward.

[tootsie]

Nov 13, 2015 12:17:36 GMT -5 mcktymck said:

I am seeing a female doctor, mainly because she was the one with the most availability, and there is only one male doctor in the practice. I prefer a female anyways though, for some reason the thought of another man down there besides my husband weirds me out, even though I know he would just be doing his job. I feel more comfortable around women because I feel like they are more likely to know what I am going through and can relate to me the best.

Off topic, but I just noticed that you could have your baby on your first anniversary, which would be the best.

[mcktymck]

tootsie we are hoping it works out that way, best anniversary present ever!

[beebe918]

Nov 13, 2015 12:07:35 GMT -5 tootsie said:

Nov 13, 2015 11:42:40 GMT -5 beebe918 said:

I have a female midwife, she was on vacation for 2 weeks towards the end of my last pregnancy and I saw a male ob in the same practice. I LOVED him, like pps have said he was so much gentler and my midwife was not even willing to talk about induction until 22 weeks and said I didn't need an ultrasound to make sure the baby wasn't too big. The male on let me get an ultrasound at 40 weeks and let me be induced at 41 weeks. My midwife ended up delivering me but the male ob came at the end bc of complications. I will say I believe the female was so much more helpful during delivery, she basically slapped me into shape when I was refusing to push, I feel like the male might have handled me with kid gloves.

Are you going to see the midwife or the OB for this pregnancy?

I wish my practice had a midwife.  I used a stand-alone birth center with my DD and I loved my midwife.  We moved though, and there are no options I trust in my new area.

The midwife, I liked her before I delivered but I am so thankful for her after, like I could cry right now.  She was so great during delivery, I have no idea how I would have done it without her.

[TnT10]

Nov 13, 2015 12:08:30 GMT -5 tootsie said:

Nov 13, 2015 11:29:37 GMT -5 TnT10 said:

I have a female OB and always have EXCEPT for when I was on the Depo shot; the only doctor in town that offered it at the time was male. I didn't feel comfortable with him but he wasn't exactly the friendliest person I've ever meant either.

To piggyback off of this topic, there was a news story that came out last week in our area about a male OB that had "relationships" with 10+ patients. They were all consentual but it is still really unprofessional that it happened inside of the practice. He was a part of the practice that I currently go to (it is the largest in the area) but he obviously isn't anymore. I didn't think it was really professional of the local media to blast him all over the place because they were consentual patients, but I guess that's what the media does at times!

Whoa that's crazy! I vaguely remember hearing a snippet about that on the news.  Did they release the names of the patients involved?

They didn't say any of the patients names (I don't think they can with all of the HIPAA laws) but they did say the doctor's name on every news station!  Are you in Indiana also? 

[bluedot]

In the office that I go to I have 3 male OBs. They are all wonderful! I prefer 2 of them to the 3rd... but that's strictly based on personality. I'll see all 3 during the course of the pregnancy, then whoever is on call will deliver when I go into labor.

I was nervous when I chose this practice because I thought I wanted a female OB too.. but really I can't imagine being happier with my doctors or the medical care I've recieved.

[tikoberry99]

My RE is male and I'm currently looking for an OB now. I think I would feel more comfortable with a female, but I'm going ask around and look at reviews. There are no midwifes near my house covered under my insurance boo.

[allison7]

My primary OB is a male. The practice also has females (I have seen a few of them before and one of them was my delivery OB) and one female midwife. My OB (the male one) is very calm and mellow, which is helpful. He was pretty sensitive to my pgal and paif status last time and he kept commenting on how cool this pregnancy is at my confirmation appointment (because it is so unxpected - I supposedly have DOR).

Side note - he was on The Price is Right. Google "Dr. Bummer Price is Right" and there are videos.

[tootsie]

Nov 13, 2015 12:58:30 GMT -5 TnT10 said:

Nov 13, 2015 12:08:30 GMT -5 tootsie said:

Whoa that's crazy! I vaguely remember hearing a snippet about that on the news.  Did they release the names of the patients involved?

They didn't say any of the patients names (I don't think they can with all of the HIPAA laws) but they did say the doctor's name on every news station!  Are you in Indiana also? 

Oh yeah, HIPAA, duh.  I'm in Texas, I have no idea how I heard about it.  I saw in another thread someone said they were from Fort Wayne, was that you?  My H's dad's family are all there!

[TnT10]

Nov 13, 2015 14:23:54 GMT -5 tootsie said:

Nov 13, 2015 12:58:30 GMT -5 TnT10 said:

They didn't say any of the patients names (I don't think they can with all of the HIPAA laws) but they did say the doctor's name on every news station!  Are you in Indiana also? 

Oh yeah, HIPAA, duh.  I'm in Texas, I have no idea how I heard about it.  I saw in another thread someone said they were from Fort Wayne, was that you?  My H's dad's family are all there!

That's funny, I figured you were close by if you heard about it, it was all over.  Yep, I'm from around Fort Wayne, small world haha! 

[ginabini]

I think I definitely have the unpopular opinion of the day... but I've always seen female OB/GYN's. (This is my first pregnancy so obviously first time as an OB patient.) Probably because that was who my mom always saw so I had the heeby jeebies about seeing a male doctor from the beginning. However, so many people here have had such wonderful experiences it is probably totally an uncalled for "fear" on my part

[honeybee434]

I've always had female OB's and that's always been by choice. Just a personal preference. Ive always said that if I had to have a male OB due to them being on call for delivery, I wouldn't care, but just day to day gyno thinfs I feel more comfortable having a female dr. I grew up in a really conservative household so I think that's where my female comfort level comes from.

[betheliz]

Like others, I've found my male OB to be gentler and kinder. I didn't really want a male doctor, but my husband googled docs in my area and this guy literally had rave reviews.

I will say that in my very limited experience, there is more of a difference between older and younger obs than male and female. Younger docs tend to be more conservative and even overly conscientious, which i find overwhelming. last pregnancy, i called the after-hours line because my leg was slightly swollen and the young doc nearly insisted that i rush to the hospital. the next time i saw my ob, he chuckled at the overreaction.

[glaze]

I have a male OB. I agree with the gentler and kinder, not that all females aren't but from my experience this is mostly true. I also prefer a male OB because you get more appt time options because usually the females are more sought after and booked up.