Ok. So I just have to say this. My social worker friend was on a case where the mom took her son out of the car seat to BF in the back during a road trip. Needless to say, the worst thing imaginable happened, they got into an accident and their son is now a quadriplegic: :-(
Post by islandlover on Jan 30, 2015 13:27:14 GMT -5
I'm sitting in the driveway probeing bc DD fell asleep on the way home from lunch and I'm not ready for her to wake up yet.
I just recently became a certified car seat tech (inspector) and we watched a lot of crash test videos comparing kids in car seats to kids in no car seats. I'm cringing at all of these stories of kids riding with no car seats.
I'm sitting in the driveway probeing bc DD fell asleep on the way home from lunch and I'm not ready for her to wake up yet.
I just recently became a certified car seat tech (inspector) and we watched a lot of crash test videos comparing kids in car seats to kids in no car seats. I'm cringing at all of these stories of kids riding with no car seats.
Not trying to be snarky at all, but what do car seat techs suggest you do if you need to take a public bus? Hell even a school bus because some areas have public preschool?
And, if I arrive in Aruba and get on a coach bus, there are no seat belts...so again, what are you supposed to do?
For the record, I would never take my kid of their car seat to nurse or just because. But when you are someplace that there is no way to install the car seat, what do you do? Just never go to theses places?
Post by 3magicbeans on Jan 30, 2015 13:47:33 GMT -5
I think funeral selfies are a-ok, when tastefully done.
I also don't spend a lot of time grieving for deaths in family, so I have a hard time being sensitive to people who grieve for years and years for very old, or very sick loved ones. I have a hard time at funerals for people who I am not related to since I don't know how I'm supposed to act, since our family funerals are a little less heavy than some of the ones that I've been to.
I spend a lot of time at heavy funerals wondering if everybody is just being big fakers.
(yes, I'm going to wake today, and I'm being awkward because I don't know how to act)
I'm sitting in the driveway probeing bc DD fell asleep on the way home from lunch and I'm not ready for her to wake up yet.
I just recently became a certified car seat tech (inspector) and we watched a lot of crash test videos comparing kids in car seats to kids in no car seats. I'm cringing at all of these stories of kids riding with no car seats.
Not trying to be snarky at all, but what do car seat techs suggest you do if you need to take a public bus? Hell even a school bus because some areas have public preschool?
And, if I arrive in Aruba and get on a coach bus, there are no seat belts...so again, what are you supposed to do?
For the record, I would never take my kid of their car seat to nurse or just because. But when you are someplace that there is no way to install the car seat, what do you do? Just never go to theses places?
I'm not an expert on this, but in general, the risk of injury while riding in a car is much different than if you are on a bus.
I'm sitting in the driveway probeing bc DD fell asleep on the way home from lunch and I'm not ready for her to wake up yet.
I just recently became a certified car seat tech (inspector) and we watched a lot of crash test videos comparing kids in car seats to kids in no car seats. I'm cringing at all of these stories of kids riding with no car seats.
Not trying to be snarky at all, but what do car seat techs suggest you do if you need to take a public bus? Hell even a school bus because some areas have public preschool?
And, if I arrive in Aruba and get on a coach bus, there are no seat belts...so again, what are you supposed to do?
For the record, I would never take my kid of their car seat to nurse or just because. But when you are someplace that there is no way to install the car seat, what do you do? Just never go to theses places?
They suggest the parent do whatever they are comfortable with. If that means taking public transportation with no car seat, then go for it. It's obviously not the safer option but we all have those times where we have to weigh the pros and cons.
Not trying to be snarky at all, but what do car seat techs suggest you do if you need to take a public bus? Hell even a school bus because some areas have public preschool?
And, if I arrive in Aruba and get on a coach bus, there are no seat belts...so again, what are you supposed to do?
For the record, I would never take my kid of their car seat to nurse or just because. But when you are someplace that there is no way to install the car seat, what do you do? Just never go to theses places?
I'm not an expert on this, but in general, the risk of injury while riding in a car is much different than if you are on a bus.
I don't claim to be an expert, either. I actually wasn't talking specifically about buses just riding with no car seat in general. But from what I learned in the course (which is just 4 days, so definitely didn't learn everything), you're right, buses are built different with the seats to help protect passengers during a crash.
Not trying to be snarky at all, but what do car seat techs suggest you do if you need to take a public bus? Hell even a school bus because some areas have public preschool?
And, if I arrive in Aruba and get on a coach bus, there are no seat belts...so again, what are you supposed to do?
For the record, I would never take my kid of their car seat to nurse or just because. But when you are someplace that there is no way to install the car seat, what do you do? Just never go to theses places?
They suggest the parent do whatever they are comfortable with. If that means taking public transportation with no car seat, then go for it. It's obviously not the safer option but we all have those times where we have to weigh the pros and cons.
This is a really impractical perspective, and it doesn't address the issue of public transit, which more numerous city dwellers is their life line. After having lived in both rural and urban areas, people in rural areas just do not understand car-free living.
At the same time, I think its slightly suspect because car seat techs have a vested interest in ensuring that as many people use car seats for their own benefit... to maintain their jobs, so of course they are going to take a position that everybody with small children should always drive a car.
Post by redhorizon343 on Jan 30, 2015 14:02:36 GMT -5
Oh god I would die before I got into a NYC cab with the baby w/o a car seat. No way. The drivers here are maniacs. All of them, but especially cabbies. The stereotype is SO TRUE.
I take public transportation with LO in a carrier/wrap on the train/subway. I don't care for the bus, so I haven't had that dilemma.
But yee-ikes. Driving without the baby in a car seat is some serious bad mom karma.
I think funeral selfies are a-ok, when tastefully done.
I also don't spend a lot of time grieving for deaths in family, so I have a hard time being sensitive to people who grieve for years and years for very old, or very sick loved ones. I have a hard time at funerals for people who I am not related to since I don't know how I'm supposed to act, since our family funerals are a little less heavy than some of the ones that I've been to.
I spend a lot of time at heavy funerals wondering if everybody is just being big fakers.
(yes, I'm going to wake today, and I'm being awkward because I don't know how to act)
I think "tastefully done funeral selfie" is an oxymoron. In fact, I think all photos taken at a funeral are tasteless. Taking photographs implies that you want to remember that experience and perhaps relive it later through looking at those photos. Most people would prefer to leave memorial services in the past.
Also, I think heaviness of a funeral is directly related to the age & condition of the diseased. If one has lived a long life and were suffering, people will be relieved that the suffering is over, and the funeral would be lighter. If the funeral is for a 4 year old with a degenerative condition, there's no escaping the fact that it is going to be a heavy funeral no matter what.
I think funeral selfies are a-ok, when tastefully done.
I also don't spend a lot of time grieving for deaths in family, so I have a hard time being sensitive to people who grieve for years and years for very old, or very sick loved ones. I have a hard time at funerals for people who I am not related to since I don't know how I'm supposed to act, since our family funerals are a little less heavy than some of the ones that I've been to.
I spend a lot of time at heavy funerals wondering if everybody is just being big fakers.
(yes, I'm going to wake today, and I'm being awkward because I don't know how to act)
I think "tastefully done funeral selfie" is an oxymoron. In fact, I think all photos taken at a funeral are tasteless. Taking photographs implies that you want to remember that experience and perhaps relive it later through looking at those photos. Most people would prefer to leave memorial services in the past.
Also, I think heaviness of a funeral is directly related to the age & condition of the diseased. If one has lived a long life and were suffering, people will be relieved that the suffering is over, and the funeral would be lighter. If the funeral is for a 4 year old with a degenerative condition, there's no escaping the fact that it is going to be a heavy funeral no matter what.
This statement does not take into account a number of cultures for which funerals, memorial services and "send offs" from the earthly world are in fact something that needs to be celebrated, remembered, and reflected upon year after year on the anniversary of the death. Not all cultures view death as a somber serious occurrence.
They suggest the parent do whatever they are comfortable with. If that means taking public transportation with no car seat, then go for it. It's obviously not the safer option but we all have those times where we have to weigh the pros and cons.
This is a really impractical perspective, and it doesn't address the issue of public transit, which more numerous city dwellers is their life line. After having lived in both rural and urban areas, people in rural areas just do not understand car-free living.
At the same time, I think its slightly suspect because car seat techs have a vested interest in ensuring that as many people use car seats for their own benefit... to maintain their jobs, so of course they are going to take a position that everybody with small children should always drive a car.
All of the car seat techs that I know work for other agencies and inspect car seats for free. It's done to make sure kids are riding in properly installed appropriate car seats, not to make money.
And you're right, I live in a rural area with the only type of public transportation being taxis or buses. I wasn't thinking of subways or anything else like that and wasn't meaning to include those types of transport in my first post.
Ok, I've been holding this in because I'm completely embarrassed about it. Before actually getting pregnant, I thought I was anti-vaccinations. I am a minimalist and tend to believe that medicine should be more a last-resort thing. H would not have kids with me unless I changed my mind. He also encouraged me to educate myself on what ingredients are in vaccines, the side effects of getting vaccines, and most importantly what diseases they prevent. I had no idea just how bad those diseases are and am completely embarrassed that I almost made such a critical decision for my son without doing any research and just going with my gut. For the record, I now fully believe in the use of vaccines, and LO is all up to date on his shots.
I think "tastefully done funeral selfie" is an oxymoron. In fact, I think all photos taken at a funeral are tasteless. Taking photographs implies that you want to remember that experience and perhaps relive it later through looking at those photos. Most people would prefer to leave memorial services in the past.
Also, I think heaviness of a funeral is directly related to the age & condition of the diseased. If one has lived a long life and were suffering, people will be relieved that the suffering is over, and the funeral would be lighter. If the funeral is for a 4 year old with a degenerative condition, there's no escaping the fact that it is going to be a heavy funeral no matter what.
This statement does not take into account a number of cultures for which funerals, memorial services and "send offs" from the earthly world are in fact something that needs to be celebrated, remembered, and reflected upon year after year on the anniversary of the death. Not all cultures view death as a somber serious occurrence.
I think this is my disconnect, there have been tragic deaths in my family of people who died too young, and its very sad, but in the end I try to remember the good times and honor them, and for the old people I feel like, "hey you're cool Godspeed".
A tasteful funeral selfie is done outside or in the bathroom, not infront of the casket or the ashes, etc, or during a memorial service, or the wake.
They suggest the parent do whatever they are comfortable with. If that means taking public transportation with no car seat, then go for it. It's obviously not the safer option but we all have those times where we have to weigh the pros and cons.
This is a really impractical perspective, and it doesn't address the issue of public transit, which more numerous city dwellers is their life line. After having lived in both rural and urban areas, people in rural areas just do not understand car-free living.
At the same time, I think its slightly suspect because car seat techs have a vested interest in ensuring that as many people use car seats for their own benefit... to maintain their jobs, so of course they are going to take a position that everybody with small children should always drive a car.
Actually most car seat techs do it because they just legitimately want every kid to be as safe as possible. Most of them do not do it as a job and do not get paid for it. They do not have any vested interest for their own benefit. When I am done with school I am planning on becoming a tech because it is just a passion of mine to keep kids safe in the car. I won't make money doing it, but I will gladly offer to help anyone I can for free.
Public transportation, like busses and subways, are different than cars and taxis. They are built differently. I can't say off the top of my head how it works, but there is a reason a car seat isn't necessary.
Any infant seat can be buckled in baseless and it isn't any less safe than using the base as long as it is done properly. The base is made solely for convenience.
FFFC: my head is about to explode from the car seat talk.
This statement does not take into account a number of cultures for which funerals, memorial services and "send offs" from the earthly world are in fact something that needs to be celebrated, remembered, and reflected upon year after year on the anniversary of the death. Not all cultures view death as a somber serious occurrence.
I think this is my disconnect, there have been tragic deaths in my family of people who died too young, and its very sad, but in the end I try to remember the good times and honor them, and for the old people I feel like, "hey you're cool Godspeed".
A tasteful funeral selfie is done outside or in the bathroom, not infront of the casket or the ashes, etc, or during a memorial service, or the wake.
A selfie in the bathroom? That's strange to me. I'm not very into selfies in the first place, but one in the bathroom at a funeral is just too much for me. I guess I just don't see the point.
Ok, I've been holding this in because I'm completely embarrassed about it. Before actually getting pregnant, I thought I was anti-vacations. I am a minimalist and tend to believe that medicine should be more a last-resort thing. H would not have kids with me unless I changed my mind. He also encouraged me to educate myself on what ingredients are in vaccines, the side effects of getting vaccines, and most importantly what diseases they prevent. I had no idea just how bad those diseases are and am completely embarrassed that I almost made such a critical decision for my son without doing any research and just going with my gut. For the record, I now fully believe in the use of vaccines, and LO is all up to date on his shots.
This confused me until I realized it was an auto-correct. Being anti-vacation is almost as bad as being anti-vaccination!! But seriously, I'm glad your husband was vigilant and good for you for "seeing the light". My friend's sister is an anti-vaccination, and even though her husband knows the anti-vax movement is bullshit, he just shrugs and says "happy wife, happy life". He is almost more infuriating than she is.
Ok, I've been holding this in because I'm completely embarrassed about it. Before actually getting pregnant, I thought I was anti-vacations. I am a minimalist and tend to believe that medicine should be more a last-resort thing. H would not have kids with me unless I changed my mind. He also encouraged me to educate myself on what ingredients are in vaccines, the side effects of getting vaccines, and most importantly what diseases they prevent. I had no idea just how bad those diseases are and am completely embarrassed that I almost made such a critical decision for my son without doing any research and just going with my gut. For the record, I now fully believe in the use of vaccines, and LO is all up to date on his shots.
This confused me until I realized it was an auto-correct. Being anti-vacation is almost as bad as being anti-vaccination!! But seriously, I'm glad your husband was vigilant and good for you for "seeing the light". My friend's sister is an anti-vaccination, and even though her husband knows the anti-vax movement is bullshit, he just shrugs and says "happy wife, happy life". He is almost more infuriating than she is.
Damn auto-correct!! It's killing me this week!! But seriously, my H is a hero here.
I just raged on J and feel horrible for it, but for the past 3 days he has brought all his toys out of his room and dumped them everywhere because it is "Christmas" again and he is setting presents out. Our house is trashed all the time and I can barely walk. Add to it a baby who has barely been sleeping and is extra crabby because of it and my brain just exploded.
I am full of resent today that H gets to come and go as he pleases (not really true, but in my mind it is), and I can barely make it through a shower without being bugged for something.
I don't want to be the primary parent anymore. It is too much to keep up with it all.
I wish I enjoyed my baby more. He makes it so hard.
Ok, I've been holding this in because I'm completely embarrassed about it. Before actually getting pregnant, I thought I was anti-vacations. I am a minimalist and tend to believe that medicine should be more a last-resort thing. H would not have kids with me unless I changed my mind. He also encouraged me to educate myself on what ingredients are in vaccines, the side effects of getting vaccines, and most importantly what diseases they prevent. I had no idea just how bad those diseases are and am completely embarrassed that I almost made such a critical decision for my son without doing any research and just going with my gut. For the record, I now fully believe in the use of vaccines, and LO is all up to date on his shots.
This confused me until I realized it was an auto-correct. Being anti-vacation is almost as bad as being anti-vaccination!! But seriously, I'm glad your husband was vigilant and good for you for "seeing the light". My friend's sister is an anti-vaccination, and even though her husband knows the anti-vax movement is bullshit, he just shrugs and says "happy wife, happy life". He is almost more infuriating than she is.
Thank goodness for your husband.
Not going to lie I would go ape shit on you if you really were anti-vax. This measles thing is seriously pissing me the fuck off.
Post by joshan1719 on Jan 30, 2015 15:54:54 GMT -5
If I were a SAHM I would absolutely drop my kiddos at DC 1-2 days a week. Momma needs a fucking break. This momma also doesn't "miss" her kids when she doesn't see them for 8+ hours.
Do you have a baby carrier (ergo, ring slig, meitai?) This is how I usually handle public transportation.
My carseat does not require the base...it can go in any car with just a seatbelt which is why I got it. I think people who cab it alot use these types of carseats.
When we had our car seat safety class, we were told that every single car seat these days is supposed to be made so that it can be strapped into a car without a base. This isn't supposed to be intended for everyday use, but in an emergency case like @acerpediem, or someone unexpected needs to pick LO up from daycare, etc. I have not checked my instruction manual for my car seat to see if it actually gives instructions for that or not, so I can't verify personally. But I do know that was said and demonstrated during our class.
To the bolded: I have never heard or read anything saying that using it without the base was for emergencies only. We've never used the base with either kid.
Ok people who live in NYC or another similar city...how do you normally do taxis? I would assume people jump into cabs all the time With their babies, much like busses and subways. Maybe I'm wrong.
In September we plan to go away to an island. I have no intention of bringing a car seat and figure LO can ride in our lap on the shuttle bus from the airport to the resort.
she was in a booster until eleven (based on height, she should probably still be in one at 14, but technically I should, too. At at a certain point you just have to give it up).
My 4'11, 110LB self knows exactly what you're saying.
I think "tastefully done funeral selfie" is an oxymoron. In fact, I think all photos taken at a funeral are tasteless. Taking photographs implies that you want to remember that experience and perhaps relive it later through looking at those photos. Most people would prefer to leave memorial services in the past.
Also, I think heaviness of a funeral is directly related to the age & condition of the diseased. If one has lived a long life and were suffering, people will be relieved that the suffering is over, and the funeral would be lighter. If the funeral is for a 4 year old with a degenerative condition, there's no escaping the fact that it is going to be a heavy funeral no matter what.
This statement does not take into account a number of cultures for which funerals, memorial services and "send offs" from the earthly world are in fact something that needs to be celebrated, remembered, and reflected upon year after year on the anniversary of the death. Not all cultures view death as a somber serious occurrence.
I respectfully disagree. While I didn't elaborate on different kinds of services, my general point still stands. I think the tone of the funeral is not necessarily relevant. It can be somber or a party, either way. What is important is that you are present in the moment and actually experiencing the event. Taking photos takes you out of that, and a selfie in general, but specifically at any kind of event where the focus is on another human being is inherently (just a little bit) narcissistic. (That being said, I'm pretty photo-averse in general. It bothers me when people take pictures of their dinner in a restaurant as well. Just enjoy your meal and your company, instead of sitting around on your phone taking pictures. It's a similar concept to me.)
This statement does not take into account a number of cultures for which funerals, memorial services and "send offs" from the earthly world are in fact something that needs to be celebrated, remembered, and reflected upon year after year on the anniversary of the death. Not all cultures view death as a somber serious occurrence.
I respectfully disagree. While I didn't elaborate on different kinds of services, my general point still stands. I think the tone of the funeral is not necessarily relevant. It can be somber or a party, either way. What is important is that you are present in the moment and actually experiencing the event. Taking photos takes you out of that, and a selfie in general, but specifically at any kind of event where the focus is on another human being is inherently (just a little bit) narcissistic. (That being said, I'm pretty photo-averse in general. It bothers me when people take pictures of their dinner in a restaurant as well. Just enjoy your meal and your company, instead of sitting around on your phone taking pictures. It's a similar concept to me.)
I disagree with you. I can understand and respect having these views within your own culture but It is ethnocentric to apply what you believe based on your cultural traditions and morals to others outside of your culture. In some cultures what you call a funeral serves an entirely different purpose.
Ok, I've been holding this in because I'm completely embarrassed about it. Before actually getting pregnant, I thought I was anti-vaccinations. I am a minimalist and tend to believe that medicine should be more a last-resort thing. H would not have kids with me unless I changed my mind. He also encouraged me to educate myself on what ingredients are in vaccines, the side effects of getting vaccines, and most importantly what diseases they prevent. I had no idea just how bad those diseases are and am completely embarrassed that I almost made such a critical decision for my son without doing any research and just going with my gut. For the record, I now fully believe in the use of vaccines, and LO is all up to date on his shots.
This is the extremely rare "Accipientis mutavit animum et educationem." or "Person who received education and changed their mind. This species lives constantly on the brink of extinction.
When we had our car seat safety class, we were told that every single car seat these days is supposed to be made so that it can be strapped into a car without a base. This isn't supposed to be intended for everyday use, but in an emergency case like @acerpediem, or someone unexpected needs to pick LO up from daycare, etc. I have not checked my instruction manual for my car seat to see if it actually gives instructions for that or not, so I can't verify personally. But I do know that was said and demonstrated during our class.
To the bolded: I have never heard or read anything saying that using it without the base was for emergencies only. We've never used the base with either kid.
I guess that was just my understanding and personal preference rolled into a naïve comment.
To the bolded: I have never heard or read anything saying that using it without the base was for emergencies only. We've never used the base with either kid.
I guess that was just my understanding and personal preference rolled into a naïve comment.
Ok, I thought there was some PSA out there that I had missed.
Post by prairiegirl on Jan 30, 2015 16:26:44 GMT -5
I'm the mom that's taking my kid out when it's just below freezing in a lined hoodie and a blanket for covering. He runs HOT and if he gets to hot he loses his shit. I'm in a tshirt and hoodie right now. I have him in a sweatshirt and hoodie and threw a blanket over him to walk from the car to the store. I'm sure I'm getting side eyed.
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