Working Mom Check-In 12/17

[Widget123]

Where are all of the working moms at?  This check-in is for you!

How is LO doing with his/her daycare or babysitter arrangement?  Are you stressing at work trying to juggle it all?  ETA: What are your plans related to baby eating solids at daycare? Feel free to discuss whatever

[Widget123]

Part of the reason why I wanted to do a check-in was to ask you how much milk/formula and solids your baby is eating at daycare, if you've gotten to that point yet.

DD didn't start daycare until 7 months (was at a family babysitter previously) but ate three 6 oz bottles at daycare from that point until close to the 12 month mark. I think around 8 months was when she started eating breakfast and lunch at daycare as well, without dropping bottles.

LO had been eating four 5oz bottles at daycare (he is there from about 6:30am to about 4pm). They started feeding LO 2.5oz of purees plus cereal 2X a day (breakfast and lunch) and dropped 2 of his bottles. So now he is taking two 5 oz bottles at daycare. A few weeks ago I told them to slow down with the solids (they provide them) and make sure he is eating enough bottles, but time has past and now it seems that they are back up to feeding him lots of solids again without the bottles (also reflected on daily sheet). I usually don't drop off and pick up and DH thinks whatever they are doing is great (doesn't want to tell them different). I think my solution for now is to up the daycare bottles to 6 oz. Eventually they are going to move him up to finger foods, but I'm not ready for that yet.

[Widget123]

@kej0004, that sucks. I assume it is related to being exposed to substances (for lack of better words)? My boss had a very negative attitude about me pumping with DD and asked me how long too, it was awkward but it didn't limit me as much as it sounds like it is limiting you.

[alayne926]

Ugh, sorry you're feeling pressure @kej0004.

Widget123, we haven't started solids at school yet. S just doesn't seem to interested in them, and I don't want to waste a lot there while she's learning.

DC is going OK. We've had to make a few requests of them not to prop her bottle up and to hold her while feeding. That was a little frustrating that it had to be addressed more than once. Good news is that the teacher I was not a fan of in S's room seems to be gone now. She currently has 5 5oz bottles at DC. I think she's almost ready to bump up to 6oz, but with her reflux, I don't want to do it too fast.

[musicfrk2002]

J has only been at daycare for about a month, but he loves it! He is at a home daycare that is through a friend of my mom's, so I know he is in good hands. Since I'm still part time, he is usually only there a couple of hours a day so he usually only eats one bottle. We keep a few bottles there as well as a partial container of formula, and they wash the bottles and let us know when the formula is low. Less to tote back and forth.

She did say something about starting cereal with him, but I don't remember exactly what. Some law that they have to provide "snacks" at 6 months old and up.

He sticks to his regular bottle schedule as far as I know. We just upped him to 6 oz bottles and he eats every 3 hours, unless he is taking a long nap.

[Widget123]

Dec 18, 2015 11:12:34 GMT -5 Kristykristyleelee said:

Dec 18, 2015 10:49:55 GMT -5 Widget123 said:

My gut reaction to this is - isn't it your call what the ratio of food vs. bottle your LO eats, not the DCP? Like...if you say less solids, more bottles, they better do as you say.

Yeah I know but since DH is usually the one interacting with them daily and he doesn't want to say anything to them, it is limiting my ability to control the situation as I would like to.  I could call them up on the phone and talk to them or make the trek way out of my way to talk to them in person, but then they could just decide to do what they want again with DH's blessing.

[holliberry28]

ilovelucyv, I'm mad for you just reading that. I would absolutely call and make a point of it that they give him the amount of bottles that you want him to take, and not give him more solid foods if that's not what you want. If you don't think a conversation over the phone would be effective, I would also send in a signed and dated letter specifying how you want him fed (probably anal on my part) but maybe if it's in writing, they'll be less likely to do whatever they want. And just thank them in the letter for understanding. If they still don't follow your guidelines, I would try to find another daycare.

M isn't in daycare, he stays with my MIL. She comes at 6:30 in the morning and stays til 5:30 when DH and I come home from work so it's definitely a long day for her. She pretty much does what we ask, except it's been a real struggle to have her let M nap in his crib. Instead, she's been taking him outside in the stroller 3x a day, and walking a total of 4 miles a day. Needless to say, after not being to take him out yesterday due to the rain, and having him cry and not be able to nap in the crib, she seems more on a board to slowly try to get him used to the crib during naptimes. We're also not letting him sleep before 2 hours of awake time between bottles, because I think he was getting too much broken up nap times with her. That's about it. She thinks I don't clean enough, but that's true. I don't ask her to clean our house, but she does it anyway because she's super grandma. And, a little obsessed with the baby. But, I digress. Looking to start him in daycare when he turns 2.

[beersandweirs]

@kej0004 I used to work in a petroleum lab with all kinds of organic solvents (before I was pregnant), one of my co-workers was pregnant while I was there, though. I couldn't even imagine being pregnant in that environment, I mean there is always PPE, but I would just be soooo nervous!

[baytosa2013]

Working mom here on my last day at work for 11 glorious days!! Everything is going well so far. We LOVE her daycare and her teachers. I am so grateful for them because otherwise I couldn't feel ok about dropping her off every day. I'm going to be sad when she moves rooms in August.

ETA: I didn't see the part about eating at DC because I started the post like an hour ago and just got back to it.
C is taking 4 5oz bottles and eating puree that I send once a day.  We are giving her a 2nd helping of puree at night an hour before her last bottle of the evening.  We have to fill out an eating plan once a month or any time there is a change to their eating or sleeping schedule.  They follow it pretty much to the T.  They will keep any snacks you bring and will only provide full meals once the kiddo is mostly off the bottle so around 1.  I am totally fine with this set up because it allows me to dictate what, when and how much she's eating.  They let me know what things she liked, loved or hated which is nice to know.  DH does drop off and I do pick up so there's always a chance for me to speak to her main teacher each day.

[billyhorrible]

Widget123, Your situation sounds really frustrating. I feel like I'm more like your husband - I hate confrontation, even when it's not angry or aggressive! But calling or going out of your way sounds like such a hassle. I think your DH really needs to say anything in as nice a way as possible. Like when asking about his day. "Wow, he didn't drink much milk today huh? The doctor's not going to love that. His pediatrician really wants him to be doing more milk and less solids." That way it doesn't seem like he's bitching them out.

How is LO doing with his/her daycare or babysitter arrangement? There are things I love about it, and things I dislike about it. In general he's very happy and content there. He rarely fusses for them and is always in a good mood when I pick him up. But they definitely overfeed him and aren't great about his naps.


Are you stressing at work trying to juggle it all? I'm not, but my expectations for myself at work and at home are REALLY low. The house is a mess and if I get 5 hours of (interrupted) sleep a night, it's a "good night." It helps that I won't have another trial until March, so things are a little slower in the office.

What are your plans related to baby eating solids at daycare? He starts today. He's the only infant at daycare, there's a 18 month old, a 2 year old, and a handful of 3/4 year olds. She makes lunch for all of them and now BH will join them. He'll eat whatever they're eating (except peanut butter or honey). He's going to be in Heaven! He was already insanely happy when he got to sit at the big table with them instead of on the floor. I'm waiting to see how it will effect his milk intake. Truthfully, I wouldn't mind if it dropped a bottle, but like I said, she overfeeds him. I send 4 4oz bottles and had to fight with her not to send more (because I'm just getting that much by adding in a pump session every night). He's there from 8-5:00. At home during the same time he only eats 3 times, and at work I pump every 3 hours, which is 3 times a day.

[shahoi]

Widget123 That is completely unacceptable! Especially if you have already had a discussion about less solids and more liquids. I would definitely bring it up again and let them know that you will let them know when you want things done differently.

budders The notebook is a great idea! My DH drops LO off every morning and my MIL picks her up about 80% of the time, so I rarely get any face-time with her. DH isn't the greatest about relaying messages, so I write a lot of notes as well.

We really love our DC. It's a small, in-home one and they are so good with O. She has always done whatever we ask and always makes it known to just let her know if she needs to do anything different. As of now, she is drinking 3 5.5 oz bottles and oatmeal cereal in the morning. I was having her feed her puree in the afternoon, but we changed it to evening time because I felt like I was missing out on that.

[jessila]

My mom watches O. She comes to my house around 7:30 and leaves between 4:45 and 5:30 depending on which school I'm at that day. Things are great. She drives H a little crazy in the morning bc he's not a morning person and she talks a lot.

So far the only issue has been O coming home from her house smelling like smoke. And his stuff smells like smoke. I washed everything I could Thursday night and realized his changing pad for his diaper bag smells like smoke. Ugh. My dad smokes but only in his bedroom. Apparently my mom kept taking O in there to hang out on her bed but she offered to stop since I complained about the smell.

The life balance thing is really hard right now. I feel like the week flies by because I leave for work at 6:45 or 7:30, get home 4:45-5:30 and nurse O who then takes a 30 minute nap, then I make dinner, I shower or O gets a bath (we alternate days to make my life easier!), then it's bedtime. I stretch bedtime out to 45 minutes. He's usually asleep after 20 but I need those snuggles and decompress time. I pack my stuff for the next day and try to be in bed by 8:45. If we have 2 wake-ups it gets me about 7 hours of sleep total which is kind of my limit for functionality. Three wake-ups makes for a hard day. This year I only teach Monday-Friday AM so I have 2 1/2 weekends every weekend. I treasure that half day and can't imagine having a full week.

O will be 6 months on Christmas Eve. His appointment is 12/28 and I'll talk with the dr about eating and stuff then. He's eating solids once a day right now and gets about 1 oz in, I think. He isn't the hugest fan of it.

Like budders, I have a chart to communicate with my mom. I hung it on the fridge in a sheet protector and we write on it with dry-erase marker (another teacher trick). I write down when he ate after midnight and can leave notes about stuff. She writes when he ate and what his naps looked like unless she's at her house. Then she usually forgets when he napped/ate last which isn't helpful.

People at work keep asking how long I plan to BF but not in a negative way. Many of them have BTDT and understand. Although a lot of the older women encourage me to stop when he gets teeth because he'll obviously eat my nipple? The others just want me to be able to socialize with grown-ups during lunch which I would like as well.

Sorry this is a book. I'm on my second cup of coffee and slept reasonably well last night :-) Hopefully we'll all get some sort of break for the holiday season soon!