SAH Sunday

[Bluedaisy]

How's it going for all of you who stay home?  Do you ever get bored with the routine? What are your biggest challenges/ frustrations?

Any epic wins or monster fails lately?


Oh and how on earth do you get through the day without snacking all. day. long.?

[Bluedaisy]

I've found that my biggest challenge is the guilt. If I take a minute to check in here or colour or read instead of cleaning or something I feel terrible.

Also when I'm home with LO we don't watch TV but the second DH comes home it's ALWAYS on and it drives me batty. I think it's a bad habit and it makes me feel like LO and I are far less interesting than reruns of whatever crap DH is watching.

I'm also really struggling with healthy eating because I'm an emotional/boredom eater. When I worked I could manage it because I would only pack healthy foods, if I didn't have them I wouldn't eat them.

[periwinkledaydreams]

Hmm.. I never thought about taking a minute to color or read! I stay home but I am super busy searching and applying for jobs and dealing with a shit ton of phone calls and paperwork for my workers comp case, that any "free time" I might have is eaten up by that. When Im on here Im usually job searching and/or she's asleep on me lol. My LO is a cat napper also, so I really only get like 15 minute windows to cram things in, and if I allow myself to breathe and do nothing or maybe shower or sometimes just cry for one of them, I don't feel guilty about it! I'm still overwhelmed a good bit of the time and really hope to find at least a part time job soon. A win for me is listening to my sister in law and getting out of the house with LO to the library or something fun once a week or so and trying not to feel guilty about that. What I need to add is listening to my therapist and getting out of the house at least once a week baby free!

ETA to say I often feel guilty that although Im home with LO I feel like Im having to ignore her in order to take care of all the crap I have to get done. I definitely don't pay attention to her the way I would if I were stay at home by choice

[griffindor24]

I love being a stay at home mom (most days). I definitely get bored with the day to day routine but then when that routine is broken I am reminded of why my kids need it and I'm thankful that we have a loose schedule. The biggest things that keep me sane during the winter when we are stuck inside are Tuesday toddler gym at our church and Thursdays I work at a local consignment shop. The biggest challenge is also the guilt. While I know in my head that what I am doing is important with raising my kids sometimes its hard to feel a sense of purpose, especially when my husband comes home and tells me what he does at work. My huge win lately is having my daughter finally seem to catch on to potty training a little. I never thought I'd be so excited about another person peeing in the potty. Oh, and I'm terrible about my eating. Sometimes I forget to eat and sometimes I feel like I'm eating us out of house.

[purple]

I think I belong here because I'm self-employed, and I'm not working much at the moment. I am a full time mummy who works a bit when Daddy's at home :-)

We're lucky enough to live in a small town where there are lots of classes and clubs. We have regular sessions every morning except Thursday, and swimming lessons on Monday afternoon (although not at the moment as the pool was badly flooded at the end of last year). We've met a number of other mummies and babies through these so we often go out for coffee (well, they have coffee) afterwards. L loves all the activities we do and she's beginning to interact with the babies we see regularly.

I also try to go for a walk at least once a day. L loves the parks, especially looking at trees, and the exercise does me good, particularly pushing her uphill!

My parents live quite close by and my mum comes round several times a week. She plays with L or takes her for a(nother) walk if the weather is good enough. After L's swimming lesson she stays with her so I can have a swim. The plan is that over the course of the next six months we work up to Granny looking after the baby for two whole "sessions" a week, probably Tuesday afternoon and Thursday morning. At the moment I mostly do housework or dinner prep when she's around, but long term I'll use that time for my business.

My biggest challenge recently has been feeling isolated despite all the people we see regularly. I've been talking to some of my older friends about this and we're going to try to meet more regularly. L is very gregarious and loves people, so hopefully this will work! I think the trouble is that the new friendships are quite superficial. It seems from talking to people that feeling isolated is very common when you have a baby, so hopefully it won't last!

Spending time with H can also be difficult. He gets home at six and bath time is at seven. We usually do bath and bedtime together, but of course that's baby focused. If we're lucky, by the time she's asleep and all the jobs are done (tidying up after dinner, laundry, and nappy stuffing) there might be an hour. But that's also my only free time. I read TCF (and now post) when Baby is napping, falling asleep at bedtime, or during the night when she's awake, but that's not really free time! Finding a balance is hard.

[purple]

Bluedaisy, if you can find time to read or colour, go for it! I haven't had time to colour since before L was born. I occasionally manage to read if she's having a good nap, but find TCF and Facebook more convenient because I can just drop them when she wakes.

periwinkledaydreams, your situation sounds really difficult. Hope you find a job and / or your health improves soon.

griffindor24, raising humans is one of the most important jobs anyone can do, and it's hard.

@babybean9, hope you find a new house soon and that it helps.

Our house is definitely too small now that we have L. We will find out soon whether we can go ahead with the conversion or whether we need to find a bigger house. If the conversion goes ahead we'll have to put a lot of our stuff in storage.

I am hungry all the time. It never stops. I try to eat real food but it doesn't always work!

[thecatsmeow]

Things are going pretty well here. I was really worried about winter and cabin fever, but instead I feel like I've really come into my own as a mom the last couple months. It really has little to do with me actually. It is more so that LO is napping better and starting to show more interest in food and we actually seem to have a bit of a routine which makes me feel a little more confident.

We still try to get out of the house a couple times a week for well baby clinic, library story time, groceries, appointments, or moms club activities. Despite all of that I cannot wait for spring and summer and outdoors and sunlight!

Main frustration is guilt. I loved having my income and feeling like I contributed that way, I struggle with feeling like contributing my time is somehow less important. And stupid people with their idiotic comments are not helpful.

As for the constant eating... when I figure that out I'll let you all know! It was so much easier when I packed a lunch for work... maybe I should pack my lunch the night before! My willpower sucks though so probably wouldn't help much...

I will say I am still happy with the decision to stay home. Knowing that there are constantly job openings in my field helps, I hopefully won't have a major issue re-entering the workforce when the time comes.

[sugarkissed]

Bluedaisy, I could have written your post.

I feel guilty more often than not. I have a hard time keeping up with keeping the house clean. I feel like I don't spend enough time playing with the kids. And obviously I don't contribute to the family income.

My DH also comes home from work and instantly turns on the TV or sits on his phone. I get that he wants to relax after work, but I wish the focus would be more on playing with the kids in the hour and a half that he's home before they go to bed. I've told him that I don't want to watch TV or be on our phones during meals, but he's terrible at actually following through with it.

Also, I eat EVERYTHING. All day. I go to mom and baby boot camp classes so I feel like I earn it, a bit.. haha.

[Bluedaisy]

I'm so glad to hear from you ladies and hear that I'm not the only one going through this stuff. sugarkissed, DH and I used to never watch TV on our main floor- only in the basement and that worked great because it wasn't often on. But now with LO we watch on the main floor and it's always on. Drives me crazy. I don't want to be a family who eats dinner in front of the TV.

thecatsmeow, I'm a homebody so I wasn't worried about cabin fever but I'm definitely looking forward to nicer weather and being able to be outside with LO. Right now I wouldn't be able to get our stroller down the block and with a wind chill of -27 celcius we wouldn't get out of the driveway before we were both freezing.

[thecatsmeow]

Bluedaisy, It was definitely the cold and darkness I was dreading more so than being "stuck" at home. Just to get outside for a walk will be so nice. Hope you are staying warm too!

[tiffbot]

How's it going for all of you who stay home?

Pretty good!

 Do you ever get bored with the routine?
It's worse now in the winter, but DS is starting to get old enough where he is getting a bit more creative and we can do more together.


What are your biggest challenges/ frustrations?
One is living so rural-I love it and would never live anywhere else. However, there are days where I'd like to just pick up and go somewhere where it doesn't have to be an hour long drive to the city. So sometimes I find myself working it out where someone can come with me, or I wait until the weekend when H can come too. I'm getting used to the time it takes to pack them all up and what I need to take with me, so that's helped a lot.
Nap times can also be frustrating when one of them doesn't want to sleep and it's keeping the other up.

Any epic wins or monster fails lately?
DS is becoming very big brotherly, which I'm putting in the mom win column. It's adorable how much he's trying to help me with DD rather than fight for the attention himself. He's really starting to get it, from sharing food to toys to letting me know if she's getting too close to cords or other dangers when I'm in another room doing something. He's a good sidekick I will also consider it a win that I've noticed a lot more comfort and confidence in myself since becoming a mom of 2, and I'm able to find it less stressful when H is away or working long hours for work.
Monster fails? I've started to accept these and not dwell on them. Doesnt mean they don't happen-by all means lol! Just that I can shove them away and not let them bother me so much anymore. So let's put that in the epic win column!

Oh and how on earth do you get through the day without snacking all. day. long.?
I have a 2.5 year old. Lol!

ETA- you are asking me on a good day I may have answered this differently this past Tuesday particularily!

[Flick]

I absolutely hate being a SAH. I want to work so so badly but we can't afford it. Right now SO has an incredible job, well incredible for us. If I work we have to either be on different shifts and we would never see each other or find childcare. We're about 40 min from either of our families so we'd end up paying for childcare and here its pretty expensive. Well 200 a week is pricey for me anyways. We obviously could find a cheaper option but with all the news stories of terrible things happening at daycares I'd like to have a reputable place that I trust. I wish I lived closer to family because I know my parents or SO parents would watch her for free. Or one of my sisters would definitely for me.

[silv3rlining]

How's it going for all of you who stay home?  Do you ever get bored with the routine? What are your biggest challenges/ frustrations?

Pretty good. I've been SAH since September 2012 (when we moved and then got pregnant with DS)
Some days I wish I worked outside of the hone or had more of a routine but mostly I love being home with my kids.
The big frustration/challenge right now is really not having as much routine/friends (local SAH)/adjusting to having 2 kiddos.

Any epic wins or monster fails lately?

Fails every day (OK not always...)
Epic wins have been semi overlapping afternoon naps. It gives me a few minutes to myself to just take a breather/not feel guilty about being on my phone or just something mindless


Oh and how on earth do you get through the day without snacking all. day. long.?

I'm busy with 2 kids actually I don't eat nearly as much as I should (unfortunately). When I try to keep track of my eating it seems impossible to eat as much food as I need to, like I would just be eating ALL day long. But I get pretty busy with the 2. It seems like as soon as one is content the other isn't. Plus I'm PTing DS right now and LO is still nursing a LOT.

[wegrowsheep]

How's it going for all of you who stay home?  
Going pretty good!
Do you ever get bored with the routine?
Sometimes, but we get out enough to where I'd like to be at home more often.
What are your biggest challenges/ frustrations? Getting laundry put away, battling clutter, keeping DS1 engaged and active while DD is doing schoolwork, having time when I'm not in 24/7 "Mom Mode."
Any epic wins or monster fails lately? This sleep training has me feeling like an epic failure. On the other hand,, DD is staying ahead of her peers, so win there.
Oh and how on earth do you get through the day without snacking all. day. long.? I asked that question to my love handles and they laughed. But really, what sammyca said. Get it out of the house. Replace with almonds, baby carrots, hummus, etc. Having something to keep my hands and brain busy helps too (knitting & crocheting).

[Bluedaisy]

Joolschweets, the tea is a good idea. I'm also in the temporary boat as I go back to work in August. I get what you mean about the "busy bored". I get so sick of cleaning and I sometimes feel like I'm counting down to nap time because I can't think of anything else to do to entertain LO.

purple, if you don't mind me asking what do you do from home as your job? (Just being snoopy)

[wegrowsheep]

PSA here for entertaining LO. T found a paper bag today. Minutes and minutes of glorious whacking, hitting, yelling, crinkling, etc.
And free.

[erbear]

Can I play? I mostly SAH...
How's it going for all of you who stay home?

It's going pretty well, I suppose. I do like being with her, but I would like to have a full time teaching job again.

Do you ever get bored with the routine?

I like the "busy bored" phrase. Some mornings I'm just like, oh, here we are again, up and playing on the mat. It's why I try to take her out and do things. With the cold, though, we've been staying home and watching too much TV.

What are your biggest challenges/ frustrations?

Being a SAH mom is exhausting. More exhausting than teaching al day, because I feel like I don't get a break until my H comes home. I'm constantly on, even when (if) she's napping.

I also still have a lot of guilt over money, even though it's not like I made a ton on my own. I try to get all the chores done, although my H doesn't mind helping.

Any epic wins or monster fails lately?

H was home yesterday and today, but before that I had been home with her since The previous Monday pretty much all day by myself and this week is going to be a repeat of that - although, as long as my nieces are healthy, I will get to work Wednesday. I also mom'med through my first migraine, which was not fun.

Oh and how on earth do you get through the day without snacking all. day. long.?

I don't. :/ I'm trying to substitute water and/or fruit for my snacking, but it's really hard.

[Bluedaisy]

Of course you can play erbear, we loves you!

[purple]

Reading so many of your replies has made me realise how lucky I am that we live in a temperate climate. It's been cold for us for the last couple of weeks, but that means about -5. Whack her in a snowsuit and we can still go out every day. It does get colder sometimes, but not every year. -17 five years ago was memorable. Staying at home is much harder when it's too cold to go out. Kudos to all of you!

[prettymama36]

Sorry I'm late to join in.
I've been a SAHM for the last ten years. It's been a constantly changing experience for sure. I remember those guilty feelings that resonate on this thread so well, and also feeling like I had to run a perfect house and a perfect schedule. Those days are gone. Lol! I realized what I contribute by SAH is valuable to this family in so many ways that are important to us. The housework definitely comes last here too. I get as much done as I can and H does a lot to help out as well. It's clean, but don't look on the top of the cabinets!
I found the adjustment going back to the baby stage challenging. It's just so slow compared to when they are older and in school. Busy/bored is a great description. I have to learn to slow things down again because I really want to enjoy this little guy as much as I can because it will be gone in the blink of an eye. The winter makes it harder here too, it's so cold out and there aren't a ton of programs in my area.
I also don't have many friends IRL that are in the baby stage so, no one to bounce ideas around with and commiserate with, etc. I'm glad I'm here.
I consider it a win when I can manage to get lunches packed, supper made and everyone where they have to be in a day. My two older girls competitive dance, and that keeps us running most of the week. Fails happen all the time but like tiffbot mentioned, they don't bother me nearly as much as they used to. No one can be perfect at everything.
I also struggle to eat enough during the day and end up starving in the evening. Trying to get better at spacing things out a bit.
Bluedaisy my H used to come home and want to watch tv right away and it drove me nuts! I get it, they need to relax too after a busy day. He didn't realize that some days, I was counting the minutes until he got home for just a little break. What we figured out was that he spend time with the kids before bed and that once they were asleep, he could watch all evening in peace.
@babybean9 I had some PPD/A with DD2. In those days, a win meant I had a shower in a day. Hugs to you.
purple +1 for being nosy about the business you run
Sorry that was so long!

[purple]

Sorry, didn't mean to ignore the question (Bluedaisy, prettymama36). I design and make bead jewellery and wirework. I do some online selling and also craft fairs. It was my hobby and people kept on asking where I'd bought things, and wanting me to make stuff for them. We'd been trying for a baby for nearly two years and I was getting depressed again (I suffered from serious depression in my twenties). So with H's blessing I officially launched the business in late August 2014, and fell pregnant about a month later :-)

[musicfrk2002]

Im going to play since im at home most of the day, j only goes to daycare for 1.5 to 2 hours...

Do you ever get bored with the routine? What are your biggest challenges/ frustrations?

Always bored. It's gotten a little easier now that we've found activities to do though. I would go completely insane if we were stuck at home all the time. The biggest challenge/frustration for me is the monotony of it all when we are at home. Every day, just the same things we do over and over. I've started singing along with his toys...

Any epic wins or monster fails lately?

Not that I know of? He has had a stuffy nose tge past few days, so we have to sit in the bathroom with the shower steam to fall asleep for naps.


Oh and how on earth do you get through the day without snacking all. day. long.?

I dont. #eatALLthethings

[Bluedaisy]

purple, that's so cool! Do you have an etsy shop?