Saw RE 1/11/17 HSG x 2 - 2nd revealed both tubes open and arcuate uterus Cycle #1-2 Femara 5mg + TI = Cancelled - poor response Cycle #3 - Femara 7.5mg and Dex 0.5mg - another poor response - waiting to see when I O
Post by ladytiffany24 on Jan 28, 2016 10:04:37 GMT -5
Had to have a CTJ talk with H last night about my growing resentment towards him. Not only do I do the majority of everything around the house, including the majority of the care of DD, but most large purchases are FOR him. For example, 2 years ago he blew a huge chunk of money to fly out to California to attend the National Championship game. He will be purchasing a grill and a hot tub for our deck this spring (neither of which I really care about), and then he just sprung on me that "the guys" (his group of best friends) want to do a skiing trip in February. It started as a long weekend trip to somewhere not too far away and has turned into him being gone for 6 days out in Utah. All this after having a conversation about how we needed to cool the spending for a few months to get ourselves caught up after Christmas and some unexpected expenses in December and January.
I finally got him to understand, realize and admit that our relationship is pretty one-sided and unfair in a few different ways. He even admitted that he wouldn't be thrilled to have me just up and leave for a random vacation for almost a week and leave him to tend to everything at home. DUH!
Anyways, he's asked me to think of some ways that I can begin to do things for me. He wants to help make things more "equal." This has been a long time coming. We'll see what he says when I come up with some different ways to splurge on myself every now and then.
TL;DR: Spending/fun times in my relationship is one-sided and H finally realizes that.
Post by penguin129 on Jan 28, 2016 10:09:34 GMT -5
I'm waiting for our Realtor to contact me so I can schedule the termite inspection and find out when to drop off the "good faith" deposit. Having renters in our house until Valentine's day is making it harder to schedule things.
I have a random wedding etiquette question: My CW got invited to a wedding in March (in NY state...so Brrr...cold) that is black tie optional. CW plans to wear a floor length gown and her BF is wearing a tux. The wedding is in a church at 3 p.m. and the reception doesn't start until 6 p.m. There is no hosted cocktail hour or activity in between. Bride suggested guests go to local shops in the town or the local bar and entertain themselves.
Should CW wear her floor length gown to the church and then hang out in it for 3 hours? Should she do an outfit change?
WWGKUD?
I would wear something less dressy to the ceremony. I'm usually running late so people are lucky if I make it to the ceremony at all. (yeah, feel free to judge me.)
If they have a hotel room there is no reason they can't go back and change right before the reception starts.
Post by wannabmama on Jan 28, 2016 10:14:05 GMT -5
ladytiffany24 I'm glad he was receptive. I think it's amazing how sometimes it's so easy to completely "miss" how selfish or unreasonable behavior is. The ability as humans to see the world through our own lens is astounding. I hope he makes the changes necessary. It won't all happen at once but kudos to you for opening the door and starting the conversation!
TTC since July 2014. CP March 2015. IVF #1 March 2016, 5R, 3M, 2F with ICSI. Transferred 2 on day 3. CP. Surprise BFP and then CP August 2016 (prep cycle for IVF). IVF #2: zero eggs retrieved IVF #3: 6R, 5M, 5F, 3 (2 8A and 1 11A) transferred, one "B" graded embryo frozen on day 5. BFP (at home 7dp3dt, confirmed 14dp3dt with 1552 beta) and U/S at 5w5d, 2 sacs and 2 yolks!
ladytiffany24 I'm glad he was receptive. I think it's amazing how sometimes it's so easy to completely "miss" how selfish or unreasonable behavior is. The ability as humans to see the world through our own lens is astounding. I hope he makes the changes necessary. It won't all happen at once but kudos to you for opening the door and starting the conversation!
That's definitely how it was with him. I mean, I've brought it up before but not as directly as I did this time around. But this time, I was really able to get the point across and his eyes were opened. I'm glad he was receptive too and finally saw it. Makes me feel a little less crazy.
I have a random wedding etiquette question: My CW got invited to a wedding in March (in NY state...so Brrr...cold) that is black tie optional. CW plans to wear a floor length gown and her BF is wearing a tux. The wedding is in a church at 3 p.m. and the reception doesn't start until 6 p.m. There is no hosted cocktail hour or activity in between. Bride suggested guests go to local shops in the town or the local bar and entertain themselves.
Should CW wear her floor length gown to the church and then hang out in it for 3 hours? Should she do an outfit change?
WWGKUD?
I would totally wear the formal gown the whole time, but I love getting gussied up and want to get as much fun out of something fancy as possible. I realize that's not necessarily the norm. I think either way is fine, she should do what makes her comfortable. At a wedding last fall that had a "break" my friend and I were cracking ourselves up bc the only shoes she had were sky high sequined heels...which were pretty funny in the full catholic mass. But, no one else noticed or cared.
TTC since July 2014. CP March 2015. IVF #1 March 2016, 5R, 3M, 2F with ICSI. Transferred 2 on day 3. CP. Surprise BFP and then CP August 2016 (prep cycle for IVF). IVF #2: zero eggs retrieved IVF #3: 6R, 5M, 5F, 3 (2 8A and 1 11A) transferred, one "B" graded embryo frozen on day 5. BFP (at home 7dp3dt, confirmed 14dp3dt with 1552 beta) and U/S at 5w5d, 2 sacs and 2 yolks!
Had to have a CTJ talk with H last night about my growing resentment towards him. Not only do I do the majority of everything around the house, including the majority of the care of DD, but most large purchases are FOR him. For example, 2 years ago he blew a huge chunk of money to fly out to California to attend the National Championship game. He will be purchasing a grill and a hot tub for our deck this spring (neither of which I really care about), and then he just sprung on me that "the guys" (his group of best friends) want to do a skiing trip in February. It started as a long weekend trip to somewhere not too far away and has turned into him being gone for 6 days out in Utah. All this after having a conversation about how we needed to cool the spending for a few months to get ourselves caught up after Christmas and some unexpected expenses in December and January.
I finally got him to understand, realize and admit that our relationship is pretty one-sided and unfair in a few different ways. He even admitted that he wouldn't be thrilled to have me just up and leave for a random vacation for almost a week and leave him to tend to everything at home. DUH!
Anyways, he's asked me to think of some ways that I can begin to do things for me. He wants to help make things more "equal." This has been a long time coming. We'll see what he says when I come up with some different ways to splurge on myself every now and then.
TL;DR: Spending/fun times in my relationship is one-sided and H finally realizes that.
I am willing to accept donations from YH's bank account if he absolutely adamant about spending money. It would be an investment in the happiness of a pizza roll.
Honestly, MH is the big spender and "tries" to make all the decisions about our big purchases. It has caused alot of resentment at times because I have always had the higher salary and he has been unemployed several times since we got married.
Post by ThankfulSnail on Jan 28, 2016 10:20:18 GMT -5
Wow, sounds like there are a lot of crap days going on around here! Hope everybody's day gets better.
DH has a magical ability to get sick literally every time I do. Even when there is no way he could catch what I have- like when I'm having allergy problems. It drives me bonkers because I don't get to just be sick and get taken care of EVER, since we're both sick, we both have to keep pulling our weight.
I've taken 1 sick day since DD was born- this was last fall when I got the stomach flu, and was up all night in the restroom while DH slept soundly. I figured the one good thing was I would get the first day since DD was born at home by myself. Well, DH called me 15 minutes after his workday started saying he'd been in the bathroom "getting sick" the whole time and was coming home. Shockingly, he almost never seemed to use the bathroom after he got home and spent the whole day dicking around on his computer.
So on Saturday, I started having an awful time with my allergies due to a change in the weather- like literally I can't breathe through my nose- and it has barely improved since then. This morning, after I sat in the bathroom going through 5 kleenexes blowing my nose, DH walks in and says, "I woke up this morning and couldn't breathe through my nose!"
This isn't the first time he's claimed he "caught" my allergies but it made me want to throat punch him.
Post by ladytiffany24 on Jan 28, 2016 10:22:08 GMT -5
I hope my post didn't come off as bragadocious in any way. Didn't mean it that way. We're not loaded. H is just insistent on keeping some savings accounts for "fun things."
Post by BabyStandish on Jan 28, 2016 10:25:30 GMT -5
Got one of those Facebook make-up party invites and the host was using "today is my birthday, show me some love" as a ploy to get people to buy things. Newp.
TTC since July 2014. CP March 2015. IVF #1 March 2016, 5R, 3M, 2F with ICSI. Transferred 2 on day 3. CP. Surprise BFP and then CP August 2016 (prep cycle for IVF). IVF #2: zero eggs retrieved IVF #3: 6R, 5M, 5F, 3 (2 8A and 1 11A) transferred, one "B" graded embryo frozen on day 5. BFP (at home 7dp3dt, confirmed 14dp3dt with 1552 beta) and U/S at 5w5d, 2 sacs and 2 yolks!
Post by ThankfulSnail on Jan 28, 2016 10:26:21 GMT -5
requiressnacks, I would decline the sh!t out of that wedding because of the long gap. Unless there's a really good reason, I find unhosted gaps to be really rude.
But if I felt like I HAD to go, I would probably dress down for the whole event- cocktail dress I'm comfortable in rather than floor length, since that's technically allowed for black tie optional. If your CW already bought her dress or really wants to wear it, I agree with PPs she can get away with wearing her long dress to the bar to kill time in between.
Post by diamondsndaisies on Jan 28, 2016 10:26:53 GMT -5
ladytiffany24 so glad that your CTJ meeting worked. Yay for DH's that listen! kayladawn91, T&Ps for your family! Hope everything comes out ok.
AFM, I am happy yesterday is over. It was my due date and hit me a little harder than I thought it would. Thankfully, I have lots of family and friends who helped me through it and kept me busy. Now I can look forward to this weekend. Weekend getaway with my bestie to Omaha to do whatever the hell we want. I am ridiculously excited for it.
Post by ohinvrtedworld on Jan 28, 2016 10:27:23 GMT -5
So much hard stuff going on today for everyone. kayladawn91, said a prayer for your FIL as they do testing!
ladytiffany24, that's so good that you got to share your heart with your H about how you feel. Spending is the main source of tension in our house -- our priorities are totally different.
requiressnacks I don't have advice, but I am shaking my head at that bride & groom for putting their guests in this kind of situation lol.
Post by ThankfulSnail on Jan 28, 2016 10:29:28 GMT -5
diamondsndaisies, sorry about the tough day yesterday, but have fun in Omaha! DH and I went there to visit friends over New Year's a few years ago and had a blast. I was surprised by what a fun town it was.
So much hard stuff going on today for everyone. kayladawn91 , said a prayer for your FIL as they do testing!
ladytiffany24 , that's so good that you got to share your heart with your H about how you feel. Spending is the main source of tension in our house -- our priorities are totally different.
requiressnacks I don't have advice, but I am shaking my head at that bride & groom for putting their guests in this kind of situation lol.
YAS! This is us as well. He's way more into materialistic types of things. And I'm over here like, I've got a job, a roof over my head and food on the table. I'm happy. I think it comes from our 2 different childhoods. While he didnt' have the most extravagent childhood, his family was upper middle class and did just fine. I grew up in a family where we lived paycheck to paycheck, were late on rent more times than not and had to move a few times because we were evicted due to said late rent. I always feel like, no matter how much money we make, I'll always be frugile. Can't help it.
ThankfulSnail how annoying. But maybe YH is a hypochondriac?
It's crossed my mind before. But he doesn't mysteriously catch anyone else's ailments... just mine. I lean toward him just looking for ways to get sympathy and negate any excuse I might have not to pull my weight around the house, which I don't try to pull often, just when sick.
I have a random wedding etiquette question: My CW got invited to a wedding in March (in NY state...so Brrr...cold) that is black tie optional. CW plans to wear a floor length gown and her BF is wearing a tux. The wedding is in a church at 3 p.m. and the reception doesn't start until 6 p.m. There is no hosted cocktail hour or activity in between. Bride suggested guests go to local shops in the town or the local bar and entertain themselves.
Should CW wear her floor length gown to the church and then hang out in it for 3 hours? Should she do an outfit change?
WWGKUD?
I would probably wear something different to the cermony and then change into the gown for the reception. But that's assuming I can go home or back to our hotel room to change. If the wedding is out of town and we're not staying the night then I'd probably wear the gown all day.
TTC #1 since August 2013 DX: Endo November 2014: Hysteroscopy, D&C June - September 2015: Clomid + Novarel + IUI #1-3 January 2017: Laparoscopy - endo removed
Thanks everyone. I haven't told my mom any about what's going on because she can't keep her mouth shut. So many times I've wanted to remind her that she and my dad were to the point of filling out adoption paperwork before they got pregnant with my sister and I'm sure she had plenty of questions/comments then too.
I told H about it and he said I should reply back that we are expecting too. Expecting to move south soon.
So much hard stuff going on today for everyone. kayladawn91 , said a prayer for your FIL as they do testing!
ladytiffany24 , that's so good that you got to share your heart with your H about how you feel. Spending is the main source of tension in our house -- our priorities are totally different.
requiressnacks I don't have advice, but I am shaking my head at that bride & groom for putting their guests in this kind of situation lol.
YAS! This is us as well. He's way more into materialistic types of things. And I'm over here like, I've got a job, a roof over my head and food on the table. I'm happy. I think it comes from our 2 different childhoods. While he didnt' have the most extravagent childhood, his family was upper middle class and did just fine. I grew up in a family where we lived paycheck to paycheck, were late on rent more times than not and had to move a few times because we were evicted due to said late rent. I always feel like, no matter how much money we make, I'll always be frugile. Can't help it.
It's so interesting how these spouse dynamics end up. So I wouldn't say I'm materialistic, but I would way rather save up and get myself nice boots, or a nice curling iron. MH likes spending money on going out. I can't understand it because I make better food at home, and the booze is cheaper too He will get beer, an appetizer, and the dinner he wants, and I'm over here drinking water and eating the cheap entree.
But then he struggles with me getting something like a new slow cooker when it breaks. Come on homie! It's half the cost of eating out with you, which is so momentary and then done!
ETA: I've seen family backgrounds playing the biggest role in how people are with money -- I hope that you and YH can keep communicating well and compromising appropriately!
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