Parenting Check in Feb 29

[karlamo]

What's new parents?  How are we all doing out there?

Parenting Roster
healz413
Manada
kevinandjesse
foodislove
megd893
calsurb
andstilltrying
jazibel
kh826
karlamo
jgy
sherminator
mahler5
wittyandwaiting
kona
strings
mrsnorris
2mrsks (mrs&mrsk)
jennicole
amberreva
shemarie82
officerofthelaw
ionaerebor
firstcomeslove2013
sdfonz619
serpentine85

QOTW:  How do handle situations where other kids hurt or bully your child?  If it hasn't come up yet,  how do you think you'll handle it?

[healz413]

Ellis is a bit over 6 months and will be 28 weeks tomorrow. She is a wonderful human.

My mom and brother visited Tuesday to Saturday and it was really nice to have them here.

E is still taking short naps (35-45 min) for 90% of her naps. She has been taking 4 most days but it's pretty clear she wants to drop to 3. Problem is that with short naps, she's awake for too long between them if we only do 3. But if we try for 4, she usually won't take it and then she's up for way too long before bed. So we are trying to stretch out her awake periods a little and hoping she decides to take longer naps. This morning she slept until 7:30, though (she usually wakes 6:15-6:45) so that will help with the nap timing.

I go back to work a week from Wednesday. I had my back to work meeting with our director of HR and our executive director last week. I'm being promoted to manager (which I already knew) but it's going to be a different role than I was expecting. I'm both excited and intimidated by it.

I think I have no concept of how much I'm going to miss this baby when I go back. But I am glad that M is going to be home with her. I think it will be awesome for both of them.

QOTW: I have no idea. I hope calmly. But I'm not confident that I will keep my cool.

[kh826]

William is 20 months (will be 21 months on Friday).
Lucie will be 5 weeks tomorrow.

William had a tough day yesterday. He had lots of big emotions, and tried, fussed and whined WAY more than usual. It was a tough day for all of us as a result, but he seems SOOO much better today. He also was ravenously hungry yesterday and took a long nap, but still seemed tired. He has also been waking up a lot earlier in the morning than usual. I think that he is growing and going through a spurt. Yesterday was an off day, but I am hoping it won't be a common occurrence.

This morning William and I went out for some 1:1 time. We just ran some errands, and I took him to the Hallmark store to pick out a card and small gift for J for her bday (her bday is Thursday). We had a lot of fun, and she talked my ear off the whole time. It was cute. He picked out two really cute things for presents for J and then went over a picked out a "prize" for himself. That wasn't planned, but I am a push over so I bought it for him. It was a car and truck puzzle. He picked it up and said "Mama, prize? Walk, hold hand, no touch, nice job! Prize?" ... translation: he was saying that he walked like a big boy and held my hand, and he did a nice job not touching things in the store. So he wanted a prize. THIS KID! Well, I bought him the puzzle LOL. He did say "Thanks!" after - so there's that!

I took him for a walk yesterday afternoon. He has a radio flyer tricycle that can be pushed like a stroller (it is a 3 steps trike, that will grow into an actual tricycle when he is ready). Anyway, I pushed him in that, and he LOVED it. We did a 1.5 mile loop, and he didn't want to come inside. He has been talking about his "bike" all day today. Well, it was raining this AM, but hopefully if it dries up some outside, we can go for another walk this afternoon.

Lucie has her 1 month visit with the pedi tomorrow. I am excited to see how big she is. I am guessing 11 lbs. J thinks smaller than that. We will see who is right.
She has been have a lot more awake time during the day. She is smiling and cooing more. She is such a little sweetheart.
We briefly tried doing tummy time yesterday, and it was an epic fail. She just face planted. She had no interest in being on her tummy. We will try again in a couple of days I think. She does well hold her head up when she is being held over our shoulders, but I think maybe she might be a little lazy LOL. She likes being held and cradled, etc. I think we are going to have to go out of our way to try and get her some more floor time. We admittedly haven't done a lot of that yet. We usually have her in her boppy or her swing when she is not being held or worn. Mainly b/c it is dangerous to just put her on the floor with William around playing with toys, etc.

We went to a first bday party on Saturday for our friends' twins. It was a circus theme. It was a cute party, and William had a blast playing with all of the other kids. It was about an hour drive each way to get to the party, so we only stayed for about 2 hours, since it was really an all day event with the ride there and the ride back. Lucie did great in the car and at the party. We were pleasantly surprised that it was a good day and didn't feel hard or stressful. We actually are invited to two bday parties for next Saturday (a 2 yr and 5 yr), and we are going to try to briefly stop at both. Which might be a bad idea, but we are going to try!

QOTW: We have not encountered this yet. I think I will have a VERY hard time when we have to deal with this. I am a bit of an overprotective mama bear...

[2brides]

OMG. C was a piece of work this weekend. He is really trying to be a 13y old in a 9y old body with his attitude and disrespectful behavior. It was not a pretty weekend in our house. He lost a bunch of privileges this weekend. L was angry. I was ready to come to work today.

QOTD: Thankfully, we haven't experienced any bullying. Sometimes the older kids got extra rambunctious on the playground and I would remove my kids so they wouldn't get trampled or remind them there were younger kids there as well (now, my kids ARE the older kids on the playground that I need to remind to be mindful of younger kids!) And if other kids started getting handsy with my kids (taking toys, etc), I would just remind them to use "gentle touch/gentle hands." By and large, I've let the kids work stuff out unless I felt they were in danger, being called names, or otherwise threatened.

[sdfonz619]

*hugs* healz413 Going back to work definitely isn't easy. I hope the transition isn't too hard on you and your work days fly by!

Mila is a little over 5 months and it seems like she will be 6 months before we know it. I've already started a Pinterest board of ideas for her 1st birthday because I feel like I need to have a game plan in mind before it creeps up and there is barely anytime to plan.

As far as milestones go, she has been working on sitting up on her own for a couple of weeks now and was able to for a few seconds unassisted last night. This time frames grows a second or two every time she tries so I think she will be able to soon. Once she is able, we will start letting her try different types of food, and in preparation, we have been sitting her in her highchair for meals at the dining table. So far, she seems to love it.

MW and I have started talking about our plan at ttas, and are thinking about late spring/early summer. Our plan is for me to carry number two, and she will carry number 3, or we will consider reciprocal IVF. Our donor is open to whatever we decide and will make himself available to us as long as he is able which is reassuring.

QOTW: This is something I think about often and the thought of something like this becoming an issue absolutely terrifies me. I, too, am definitely a mamma bear and can imagine MW will end up stepping in as she is able to better handle situations like this is a calm manner. The thought of Mila being bullied is heart wrenching for me.

[cetcar]

M was 5 weeks old last Thursday. Yesterday we were looking at pictures of when she first came home and she has grown so much.

She has been smiling more and it is just the cutest. Her whole face seems to light up. We've been doing tummy time for a while now and when she is in the mood, she will lift her head and move it around to follow a toy. We have a few black and while toys and she seems to love them. A few weeks ago we tried the mamaroo swing again and I'm so glad we did. She loves it.

She has been waking up twice per night to eat. These wake ups are somewhere between 45 and 60 minutes. At night she is a grunter. If I'm not ready fast enough to feed her she makes a ka sound over and over. It's kind of funny. On Saturday night her sleep was pretty great- she woke up at 2:40 and then again at 6:15. We would like to try replicating that.

I'm really liking being a parent with CET. I find we work well as a team.

I probably won't handle bullying well. I'm pretty compassionate and protective.

[karlamo]

R turned 2 on Thursday and L turned 6 months of Friday! Baby, we've come a looong way in 2 years. Over the weekend my wife and I were reminiscing about our TTC days and never in our darkest infertility days would we have guessed that we'd be celebrating our child's 2nd birthday with a 6 month old in tow. These boys.....As our friend once said, she'll never let a moment go by without reminding them how badly their mama's wanted them.

R is being a toddler. Sweet, adorable, heart meting one minute then purposefully doing something he knows he shouldn't be doing and waiting for a reaction, the next minute. I've been reading parenting book(s) because I'm tired of not having a firm plan for dealing with his behavior issues. Last night we did a time out for kicking my wife and it worked! He listened to us.
L is bearing weight on his legs and is no longer content laying around. He wants to be doing what R is doing. We started bathing them together and OMG the cuteness of this. They both get really excited to be in the tub together. I only feel comfortable bathing them at the same time when my wife is around. They also like playing in the crib together. L will scream then R will then L. While having them so close in age is a lot of work, seeing them play with each other is awesome!

QOTW: I was at the playground over the summer and 2 older kids(5) were calling R "stupid baby". I calmly told them they could call him a baby but not stupid, understand? They were stunned I spoke to them. Then they ran off. I left right after and got in the car and called my wife crying. I realized that it's going to happen and I won't always be there to stop it.

[karlamo]

healz413, GL with going back to work. It'll be bittersweet for sure. I'm glad your wife gets to stay at home with E and get her 1:1 time.
Look on the bright side; you get to eat, pee, and talk to other adults whenever you want.

[mahler5]

karlamo-- that's awesome timeouts are working! Where do you do them? And for how long?

I've been doing them more with C. I put her in this hallway area on the other side of a baby gate. Only problem is she can open the baby gate unless I am right there keeping it shut. I thought about putting her in her room but since she sleeps there I don't want her to associate punishment with it. They seem to help a little.

[karlamo]

Mar 1, 2016 14:06:29 GMT -5 mahler5 said:

karlamo -- that's awesome timeouts are working! Where do you do them? And for how long?

I've been doing them more with C. I put her in this hallway area on the other side of a baby gate. Only problem is she can open the baby gate unless I am right there keeping it shut. I thought about putting her in her room but since she sleeps there I don't want her to associate punishment with it. They seem to help a little.

You're going to laugh but I told him to go stand against the wall and he did. We were not expecting him to listen to us but he did. Every time he moved I told him to get back there and he did.  I set the timer for 2 min and told him he had 2 min then he could move.  He cried the whole time but stayed there.  When the 2 min were up I was so happy he listened to me I praised him...opps.  Anyway, we are doing a mixture of Love and Logic and using time outs only for acts of violence, i.e. kicking my wife in the stomach, which earned him his time out.  I don't give time outs for throwing food cause it's not time out worthy to us at this point.  We use Love and Logic for that kind of stuff.

[mahler5]

Mar 1, 2016 15:25:30 GMT -5 karlamo said:

Mar 1, 2016 14:06:29 GMT -5 mahler5 said:

karlamo -- that's awesome timeouts are working! Where do you do them? And for how long?

I've been doing them more with C. I put her in this hallway area on the other side of a baby gate. Only problem is she can open the baby gate unless I am right there keeping it shut. I thought about putting her in her room but since she sleeps there I don't want her to associate punishment with it. They seem to help a little.

You're going to laugh but I told him to go stand against the wall and he did. We were not expecting him to listen to us but he did. Every time he moved I told him to get back there and he did.  I set the timer for 2 min and told him he had 2 min then he could move.  He cried the whole time but stayed there.  When the 2 min were up I was so happy he listened to me I praised him...opps.  Anyway, we are doing a mixture of Love and Logic and using time outs only for acts of violence, i.e. kicking my wife in the stomach, which earned him his time out.  I don't give time outs for throwing food cause it's not time out worthy to us at this point.  We use Love and Logic for that kind of stuff.

Thanks. Yeah, we are mainly doing it for violence or dangerous things. So when she bit me. Also did it when she would not take something out of her mouth that was not appropriate. L especially worries about her chewing on certain things. I feel like that is a bit of a stretch unless it's really dangerous but that's what we are doing now.

[mahler5]

Mar 1, 2016 16:28:41 GMT -5 mahler5 said:

Mar 1, 2016 15:25:30 GMT -5 karlamo said:

You're going to laugh but I told him to go stand against the wall and he did. We were not expecting him to listen to us but he did. Every time he moved I told him to get back there and he did.  I set the timer for 2 min and told him he had 2 min then he could move.  He cried the whole time but stayed there.  When the 2 min were up I was so happy he listened to me I praised him...opps.  Anyway, we are doing a mixture of Love and Logic and using time outs only for acts of violence, i.e. kicking my wife in the stomach, which earned him his time out.  I don't give time outs for throwing food cause it's not time out worthy to us at this point.  We use Love and Logic for that kind of stuff.

Thanks. Yeah, we are mainly doing it for violence or dangerous things. So when she bit me. Also did it when she would not take something out of her mouth that was not appropriate. L especially worries about her chewing on certain things. I feel like that is a bit of a stretch unless it's really dangerous but that's what we are doing now.

That's awesome you got him to stand in the corner! Very impressive.

[karlamo]

Mar 1, 2016 17:05:58 GMT -5 mahler5 said:

Mar 1, 2016 16:28:41 GMT -5 mahler5 said:

Thanks. Yeah, we are mainly doing it for violence or dangerous things. So when she bit me. Also did it when she would not take something out of her mouth that was not appropriate. L especially worries about her chewing on certain things. I feel like that is a bit of a stretch unless it's really dangerous but that's what we are doing now.

That's awesome you got him to stand in the corner! Very impressive.

The question with all things toddler is can it be duplicated again! I think we were shocked it worked. He knew we meant business and we're not happy. I'm more like L and I get paranoid anytime he puts things in his mouth. Maybe it's the nurse in you that is confident in emergency type situations. I'm more a freak out let me pry that object out of your mouth. Rocks kill me. I hate it when he puts them in his mouth.

[mahler5]

Mar 1, 2016 18:56:48 GMT -5 karlamo said:

Mar 1, 2016 17:05:58 GMT -5 mahler5 said:

That's awesome you got him to stand in the corner! Very impressive.

The question with all things toddler is can it be duplicated again! I think we were shocked it worked. He knew we meant business and we're not happy. I'm more like L and I get paranoid anytime he puts things in his mouth. Maybe it's the nurse in you that is confident in emergency type situations. I'm more a freak out let me pry that object out of your mouth. Rocks kill me. I hate it when he puts them in his mouth.

Rocks freak me out too. I think she freaks out about her being exposed to weird stuff in plastics or magnets, which I sort of get, but thinks she worries about it too much. I do take that stuff out of her mouth but I guess I'm not sure if it is worthy of timeout. But if she doesn't take it out when I ask multiple times it probably is. Especially since it could be something more dangerous in future etc. But I'm with you on letting some of the food throwing go etc and focusing on more dangerous things. Currently she has to put any food she doesn't want off her plate. She puts most of it on the table and not the floor now but it drives me crazy! But I'm not ready to punish her for stuff like that.

[serpentine85]

Little S just cut her first premolars. Two beautiful big ones on one side of her lower jaw. Her poor gums are all blistered and swollen and we think the corresponding teeth on the other side and above will break through before things ease up for her. She's so gentle natured that she takes it quite well. She spends a lot of time with her head on my shoulder, calm and patient. And we know it's hurting because she's started whimpering in her sleep. It's lucky she's short though because at 5'2, I wouldn't be able to keep carrying her so much.

She's said a couple of new words recently that - whilst we know we won't hear them again for a while - we are looking forward to getting into regular use. Up, down and drink. These words will go a long way towards improving communication and reducing tantrums (seriously - full blown toddler tantrums at 13 months!)
Words recently entered into regular circulation include mine, poo and banana.

We're currently working on her unfortunate habit of begging every time she sees food. She's worse than a dog, lol.

[karlamo]

mahler5, the throwing food kills me! Especially because we just redid our dining room and it's beautiful. What's not beautiful is red sauce on my white wainscoting. If I punished for throwing food, his meals would be in eaten on the wall. Right now I just remove his plate when he starts throwing it and then I ask if he's all done.