New to the Board! Autoimmune disease + Period Question

[jem]

hi ladies. I've suddenly found myself trying to get pregnant in the last week and half. I'm 35 and just got married so my hub and I were going to wait a little.
A lil background: He has Crohn's disease and had surgery last year but his body didn't go into remission. His docs want him on meds (Humira and Mercaptopurine or 6MP) ASAP. 6MP is a chemotherapy drug that could cause birth defects so as a compromise w/ his doctors, we're TTC this month so he can get on the meds as soon as possible. It's already hard dealing with his condition.

I tracked my cycle in Jan. 2015 but not before that since we weren't thinking about this. I've had medium/regular flows. I started spotting Feb. 1 and this is the lightest period i have ever had in my life. It seems like I've just been spotting the entire 4 days so far. I have to admit I've been stressed out and ruminating over his condition/our super tight deadline. i workout regularly and meditate to try to offset this stress.

Is this normal? does having a super light period change my fertility/ovulation?

Using 3 different calendar sources, my fertile/ovulation is supposed start Feb. 10 (6 days from now).

*sigh* basically if we're not successful the 1st time/this month, we'll have to wait 9 months (on the meds for 6 months, take 3 months off before we TTC) from now where i'll be 36.5. the longer he's off his meds, the higher his already high risk of colon cancer and another surgery is.

I don't know what to do...

[mom2boxers]

I would say baby dance every other day to make sure you catch your fertile window. Unless you've temped, you won't really know what day you normally ovulate on. Plus, that can always change. It's only normal until it's not. If it doesn't happen this month, get your DH healthy, and then proceed in 9 months. 36.5 isn't old.

Good luck!

[boobacat]

Welcome and congrats on your recent marriage. I'm sorry your DH is dealing with all of that, and you as well.
I would probably BD every-other day starting now to try to time it correctly if you're not sure of your ovulation patterns.

You could look into sperm banking if that's something you're interested in doing. My RE has short term and long term options so it's worth a thought.

[luvmyponies]

Welcome! I'm so sorry you're in such a tough situation. TTC is stressful enough, without the pressure of a "I must conceive on the first try" deadline. It happens... but in reality it's very unlikely. I try to remember that generally, fertility declines gradually, our bodies don't hit 36 or 36.5 and drastically change from the time we're 35. It doesn't sound like there's much you can do at this point, other than try this one month, and then focus on your husband's health for the next 9... which will also give you a chance to talk with your doctor about your irregular periods. Good luck!

[wannabmama]

I agree with mom2boxers and other PPs. Not much to do now but do the deed, best is every other day. You could temp starting now so you can tell when you've O'ed at least, but it won't give you a "heads up" so you've gotta just try to get in as much as you can!
As someone inching up on 37, I also think if you have to wait to get your hubby healthy because it doesn't happen right now, that's ok, too.
Good luck!

[nikolie93]

Welcome to the board!

PP's said all I would have. I just wanted to say sorry you find yourself in this situation and I wanted to wish you luck.

[wirt2cute]

PP gave really great advice. I'm so sorry about your husband. Good luck and have all the sex.

[lolbraun]

I agree with the other ladies, we were recommended to BD every other day... Fingers crossed for you!

[octavia65]

Hello and welcome. PPs gave solid advice. Try not to look at this as your only chance to get pregnant. Waiting another 9 months will definitely blow but you will still have plenty of time. As for now, EOD is the way to go and then if you think you pinpoint O get it on that day and the following - just to get a bang for your buck Good luck!

[lucylulu]

Can he freeze his sperm with an RE and you can use it via IUI / IVF if you want? Just another idea.
For what it's worth, we spontaneously conceived when I was almost 38. In the RE world 36 is nothing!
Hang in there. You have a lot going on. Big hugs!

[lickwed]

Everyone else has said everything I would have. I just wanted to say I am sorry for everything your family is going through. Good luck this month and welcome to the board.

[agpjt413]

I also agree w/ PPs. I'm so sorry for everything you guys are going through ((hugs))

[URMySunshine77]

I can't offer better advice than you've already received. IMHO, I think you will still be young in nine months. Don't let that stress hang over you if this cycle doesn't work.

I'm sorry that you are in this situation, and I hope that your husband's health improves quickly. This is a safe and welcoming community for you to share questions/vents/anything.

[Divefrog]

First huge hugs! This must al be super stressful for both of you. I will echo everyone and just keep it simple and BD every other day this cycle and let the chips fall where they may.

From my perspective as a huge planner and the type that always wants to have a back-up plan for my back-up plan. My biggest concern or question would be what happens or what treatment would be necessary if the 6months of meds are not successful at putting your DH into remission? Would his doctors want him to continue the meds longer, try different medications that would also not allow you to ttc?

Due to the slim chance of concieving on this one and only month, and really having a possible unknown outcome of your DH's treatment and whether you would have enough time to ttc in 9 months. I would definitely look into banking some of your DH's sperm. It would remove the connection/link between your DH's treatment/Illness and your family planning and that could greatly reduce stress for both of you. It would also give you more control over when you both want to TTC, instead of feeling thrown into having to TTC.

Best of Luck! My Mother was diagnosed with Crohn's in 2010, it is a very difficult disease to manage/live with. Luckily, after about a year she was able to achieve remission and has not relapsed since. I hope the drug treatment is successful for your DH.

[vh2014]

+1 for Banking AND EOD. Sorry you are having to deal with all of this at once.

[flyliceandcoffee]

Wanted to say welcome and good luck. Everyone else already said everything I would've said and more, so I have very little extra I can add. I hope that this is your month, but I think banking is a great idea just in case. I've had a couple friends with Crohns and it's no walk in the park by any means. I hope your husband starts to get better with the medications!