Baby tantrums??

[carolyngrace]

I feel like overnight O went from easygoing to demanding and opinionated. Along with the explosion of new skills (awesome) has come a ton of new "personality"... Like throwing things and bursting into tears when something he likes ends or gets taken away. But what's really getting to me are these loud grunting/complaining noises he's doing all the time, like if I don't get something to him quick enough.

I thought I'd automatically know how to handle this but I don't. I know he's not being "bad". So I'm not going to punish that behavior but also don't want to reinforce it by just giving him what he wants. How are the rest of you handling this? Advice from STMs??

[erbear]

We definitely have tantrums here. She lets out this loud, high-pitched squeal if we take her away from something she wants (like a phone cord). We try to minimize by distracting her with something else or giving her a hug or space while she's mad, but I also have no idea how to handle it.

[Widget123]

Im right there with you. It sure doesnt help that LO sees DD throwing tantrums all the time as well.

I just talk to him calmly and tell him "its okay" and pick him up for a bit if its really bad. Distraction doesnt really work well for us.

[carolyngrace]

budders that's good advice, thanks. I guess I do that with food, asking if he wants more or all done (and using the sign). Maybe it would help me to learn the signs for up, nurse, etc. it makes me feel more in control when I feel I'm teaching him to communicate.

[jillywilly]

I've also got a crazy baby. He loses his shit when we take things away (like carpet fuzz), or don't pick him up immediately if he wants to be held, or then put him down again. I'll echo what others have said, it's not punishable behavior, so we try to re-direct, and also try to start giving him certain words by emphasizing when we're doing certain actions, like "up," "bottle," etc.

[purple]

L is having a lot of tantrums at the moment. She's working on crawling and walking at the same time (silly girl), so she also keeps bumping into things and thinking she's really hurt herself. I think she's just super frustrated and can't express herself. carolyngrace, L moans a lot too. If I can work out what she wants I help her achieve it, and that seems to help.

We try redirection, too, but as some people said in Randoms yesterday, she thinks No is the most hilarious word in the world.

[tiffbot]

I just want to add from a STM point of view, don't feel like anything that changes in their life you should be able to automatically adjust to, if that's bothering you. Some random things it seems like you can find a groove right away, some things are such a struggle. I feel like I've totally changed my perspective and limits and reactions etc all over again recently now that DS is nearing the 3 year old part of his life. And those changes certainly didn't happen overnight, it took (and continually takes) a lot (a LOT, lol) of patience and tries to continue to adjust as a parent as each stage develops.

[littlemissgrump]

We're here too! I do redirection, distraction, and ignoring/letting him work it out. For things like food throwing, I'm stuck, I dont want him throwing food but I'm not going to take it away because he is usually still eating. He just likes to share with the dog. Ugh.

[Deleted]

P had a total meltdown while waiting in a checkout line this morning. Combination of nap time, bored, and "why the hell won't you let me crawl around on the floor in front of all these people and pull things off the shelves?" I ultimately just had to distract him with holding him upside down and blowing raspberries on his tummy. Lack of communication skills at this age is just hard for them. They aren't trying to be difficult. It's just visceral reaction to the world with no way to tell us what they are thinking.