BIL just called me because he knows something is up. Apparently DH told him he regrets the kids. BIL is coming over - I begged him not to say anything because DH is one foot out the door. BIL is furious at DH - which helps me almost not at all. So I'm grocery shopping while trying not to cry more. Two hours before the Super Bowl, so yeah, chaos.
So my plan for the week is to spend down the checking account for summer camps and clothes for the kids so if this goes left, I am not saddled with that expense. Trying to look forward to shopping.
His brother came and went - was tense, just picking something up - DH called me and said he never wants to see BIL again. He ranted for a while. Super fun.
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Post by erinshelley21 on Feb 5, 2017 17:56:06 GMT -5
I was really hoping having someone else in this with you would help. I really hope he snaps out of it soon. You don't deserve this and it certainly isn't fair.
helenahhandbasket - I really don't think so. But I don't KNOW? Totally not out of line. But I really --- doubt it. He's too - selfish if that makes any sense? I file his AMEX statements and nothing has been amiss. No cash coming out of our accounts. I trued up his paystubs because I did wonder too. Nada.
I'm really sorry 2chatter. MH is about to turn 47 and while I would not say he has had a mid-life crisis, he goes though some ups and downs with dissatisfaction with life. But we have a 2.5 yr old and 11 mo old, and so our life has drastically changed. He struggles with the mundane and lack of spontaneity, travel, downtime, etc. Usually he tries to do a spontaneous activity with the guys or as a family, or he spends $$ on a new "toy" and snaps out of it.
Post by billybumbler on Feb 5, 2017 20:48:17 GMT -5
I'm sorry 2chatter. I'm a hothead so I would probably have left already - you're a better person than me. I hope you guys can talk about it or go to therapy or something.
So sorry 2chatter. I hope for the best. I just can't see how this is sustainable for long. There is nothing worse than sitting on pins and needles in your own home. Regretting children is not really an option.
So sorry 2chatter. I hope for the best. I just can't see how this is sustainable for long. There is nothing worse than sitting on pins and needles in your own home. Regretting children is not really an option.
I agree. I'm really sorry you're going through this and I hope he gets his act together quickly. Regretting kids is not cool.
So in addition to unfriending me on FB (a few weeks ago), he has blocked me from his phone. At least I won't have to deal with complaining, threats or more Jekyll and Hyde BS this week?
Until he unblocks me and texts me all happy and nice....
So in addition to unfriending me on FB (a few weeks ago), he has blocked me from his phone. At least I won't have to deal with complaining, threats or more Jekyll and Hyde BS this week?
Until he unblocks me and texts me all happy and nice....
What? What? He blocked you from his phone? What does that even mean?
So in addition to unfriending me on FB (a few weeks ago), he has blocked me from his phone. At least I won't have to deal with complaining, threats or more Jekyll and Hyde BS this week?
Until he unblocks me and texts me all happy and nice....
So while he's out of town, if something happens to you or one of the kids, what exactly are you supposed to do? Call his office and ask them to get a message to him because he's blocked your number? Omg. That's beyond the pale.
While I am not advising YOU 2chatter to leave him (yet), because I think this could very well fall under "sickness and in health" and I would personally keep pushing, I do think maybe you should consult a lawyer and start making sure your assets are taken care of. If he is unfriending you and blocking your calls and messages, he may be on his way out and you don't want to end up screwed financially or otherwise.
While I am not advising YOU 2chatter to leave him (yet), because I think this could very well fall under "sickness and in health" and I would personally keep pushing, I do think maybe you should consult a lawyer and start making sure your assets are taken care of. If he is unfriending you and blocking your calls and messages, he may be on his way out and you don't want to end up screwed financially or otherwise.
Yes. Both that I would personally (probably) keep pushing, but also that you need to look out for yourself and your kids. My gosh, I can't believe how rapidly this has gone downhill. I'm sorry.
I ran numbers and changed the password to bank accounts, cell phone, Amazon, internet and my hotmail. I paid my car note for next month. He's acting nuts so I am acting sane.
I half feel like he's done for real and half feel like he's going to delay his flight and bring me breakfast in the morning and be all cheerful.
I don't know which scenario makes me feel more unhinged guys.
2chatter, you're dealing with an irrational, crazy person. I would stop trying to interpret his actions whatsoever and carry on with your normal life as if he plans to not be part of it. Even if he makes a drastic turnaround, the emotional damage he has done dragging you through this has taken a toll. I'm so sorry.
2chatter, this really snowballed since I last checked in about a day ago. So sorry to read all this. Aside from the face that he is acting really, really crazy... the cell-phone and facebook blocking is firstly, immature, but more importantly, it's concerning that you couldn't contact him if there were an emergency. You're superwoman, and I know you can handle anything on your own. But still. That is unacceptable.
Big hugs. I'm glad you're taking steps to protect yourself, financially.
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