I'm neutral on this, but I agree with the comment that we should be where there is an active GKU community. It looks like GKU has moved over almost entirely.
You're all free to stay and I'll stay active here and keep a watch over things as long a majority stay. But I think it's time to move over to the other site. I don't foresee this turning out well for TCF in the short or intermediate term. I don't even think the long term future for APTM is super shiny, either -- all of the same problems that happened here with regard to growth will also happen over there. It is inevitable. Unless we become part of an existing forum with a lot of marketing power, it's kind of hard to beat that. Wanna go back to TB? Babygaga? 😂
I think the best that can be hoped for is to keep most of the group in tact, and carry on together. I don't blame you if all of this has made you wary of forums. It hasn't been super fun lately.
I'd like you to be active in electing an IF moderator, too. Instead of having 3 separate mods for IF/PAIF/SAIF, those boards will have one g-mod. Those elections (nominations) are going on right now.
For anyone who is still thinking about Facebook, PM me! For anyone who just wants to keep in touch, PM me! I have also created an IG account if there's any interest in that (@theinfertiles is the name). I'll get that up and running if there's interest.
Married 10 years. DX: AMA, DOR, endo, one tube, +NK, homozygous MTHFR C677T, and abnormal endometrial function test. MFI with high DNA fragmentation and pericentric inversion on chromosome 9.
I'd rather be done with forums all together than make an account over there. I guess I'm kind of bitter that a small group of people tore apart an entire community over some petty ass shit. It's just a matter of time before they get bored and do it again. I followed them over here before I knew better, now I know.
Last Edit: May 31, 2017 14:06:50 GMT -5 by lilsneezy
TTC #1 since August 2013 DX: Endo November 2014: Hysteroscopy, D&C June - September 2015: Clomid + Novarel + IUI #1-3 January 2017: Laparoscopy - endo removed
I would feel better with a more established site (even the Dump) where we can keep our community mostly in tact and be able to share info and knowledge to others going through the same thing. I don't want to go in and "take over" like the Parenting crowd did with Scary Mommy but more spread awareness about IF and loss where it is appropriate.
ETA: I forgot about TD changing their TOU to own the rights to everything you post, including pictures. I still vote for a more established site, but not that one.
I'd rather be done with forums all together than make an account over there. I guess I'm kind of bitter that a small group of people tore apart an entire community over some petty ass shit. It's just a matter of time before they get bored and do it again. I followed them over here before I knew better, now I know.
Yeah, that pretty much sums up my feelings about the situation, too. I am pretty pissed about this whole thing. I tried to follow what was happening, reading seemingly endless pages of hollow outrage, including starting on the infamous "page 26," and mostly what I saw was a limited bunch of ladies working themselves up over nothing of import, feeding off of each other's negative energy, blowing things out of proportion, spreading and building up rumors, and then deciding to ruin everything for the rest of us. I am sure they have their reasons for all of that, but the last bit is what makes me a tad ragey.
On the other hand, the ladies of this group have been really important to me. Some I have seen around these parts since Day 1, even back to TD days. You supported me through some of the hardest times in my life.
**TW LC mentioned**
I am not just talking about IF, but also months in the NICU after the twins got impatient and came 8 weeks early, as well as my son's various hospitalizations and open heart surgery. Even when I did not post, just coming here, reading updates, rooting for you all from the shadows and knowing you were here was always comforting. So... Despite my ire, my frustration and distaste for the situation, I go where you ladies go. Even if it means there... Where nothing is really better and this implosion will only happen again.
Sorry for the novel. I may not post much, but when I do, I try to make it count.
*************Siggy Warning.************ Me: 39, DH:39 Married 4/2010, TTC since 7/2011. Dx: Officially Unexplained 6 IUIs, all BFN IVF#1 March 2014 31R/21F, 1 transferred, 12 Frosties. BFN FET #1 May 2014. 2 transferred. BFP! MMC. D&C 8/1/14 FET #2 November 2014. 3 transferred. BFN IVF #2 w/PGS ER 1/23, 16R/8F + 4 NEF, 8 made it to blast & sent out for PGS. 4 Normals!!! FET #3 2 transferred 3/23/15. BFP! Betas 4/6: 1662! 4/13: 18775!! It's twins!!
I totally don't blame any of you. If I wasn't a moderator, I'd probably just be done with forums. This is all extra tiring when this part of IF is supposed to be fun.
If you guys decide not to move, I'll stand by you. Like I said, I won't go anywhere. If you want to look into moving to a bigger forum, let me know.
Married 10 years. DX: AMA, DOR, endo, one tube, +NK, homozygous MTHFR C677T, and abnormal endometrial function test. MFI with high DNA fragmentation and pericentric inversion on chromosome 9.
I trust your judgement on this one, lemonliz. (That's me, on IG, btw.)
FWIW, I agree that APTM doesn't feel like a great long term solution. As much as some of these other "mommy" sites make me cringe, I feel better about using a corporate site. Leaving The Bump didn't rile much up in me because it's a company; the way people revolted (I guess, for lack of a better word) was not my style, but whatever. The response here was similar, but when directed at a person made me feel sick. Whatever issues anyone has with Naria, she's a human being. Bump May was probably 15 interns trading off shifts who DNGAF once they clocked out for the day. I don't know, this probably just makes me a different sort of asshole.
This. 100% this. When we left TD, I just followed the crowd. I never really felt like I even had a real reason, just didn't want to lose touch. Same issue here. I feel like we are having daily conversations about where we are all going, and I don't even know what the acronyms means aside from SM. I'll go wherever.
The only other forums I posted on regularly have been dead for months here. My vested interest forum is this one, and I would really like to support people and get support during IVF, IUI, IF, general life, etc.
To me, going back to TB is not an option. The thing that really made me follow everyone here was when TB changed their TOU so that they own everything you post, including pictures. I didn't want to keep posting about my life if they thought they owned it, you know?
I don't mind moving to APTM. I don't agree with the way everything went down over the last few weeks, and I do share some concern that a blow up could happen again. But I've gone over there with the GKU group (though mostly I've posted on the crafting and geek boards so far) so if the IF board were to move over there it would be easy for me. But making things simple for me is obviously not my goal for the group. I'll stick with all of you, even if it means posting across multiple forums.
To me, going back to TB is not an option. The thing that really made me follow everyone here was when TB changed their TOU so that they own everything you post, including pictures. I didn't want to keep posting about my life if they thought they owned it, you know?
I don't mind moving to APTM. I don't agree with the way everything went down over the last few weeks, and I do share some concern that a blow up could happen again. But I've gone over there with the GKU group (though mostly I've posted on the crafting and geek boards so far) so if the IF board were to move over there it would be easy for me. But making things simple for me is obviously not my goal for the group. I'll stick with all of you, even if it means posting across multiple forums.
Oh, I forgot about that, I only remembered the constant banning and upheaval...
Yeah, that gives me an icky feeling about going back there.
To me, going back to TB is not an option. The thing that really made me follow everyone here was when TB changed their TOU so that they own everything you post, including pictures. I didn't want to keep posting about my life if they thought they owned it, you know?
I don't mind moving to APTM. I don't agree with the way everything went down over the last few weeks, and I do share some concern that a blow up could happen again. But I've gone over there with the GKU group (though mostly I've posted on the crafting and geek boards so far) so if the IF board were to move over there it would be easy for me. But making things simple for me is obviously not my goal for the group. I'll stick with all of you, even if it means posting across multiple forums.
Married 10 years. DX: AMA, DOR, endo, one tube, +NK, homozygous MTHFR C677T, and abnormal endometrial function test. MFI with high DNA fragmentation and pericentric inversion on chromosome 9.
To me, going back to TB is not an option. The thing that really made me follow everyone here was when TB changed their TOU so that they own everything you post, including pictures. I didn't want to keep posting about my life if they thought they owned it, you know?
I don't mind moving to APTM. I don't agree with the way everything went down over the last few weeks, and I do share some concern that a blow up could happen again. But I've gone over there with the GKU group (though mostly I've posted on the crafting and geek boards so far) so if the IF board were to move over there it would be easy for me. But making things simple for me is obviously not my goal for the group. I'll stick with all of you, even if it means posting across multiple forums.
The same TOU exists here.
It does? Somehow missed that. Maybe they just haven't been as shady about it.
Married 10 years. DX: AMA, DOR, endo, one tube, +NK, homozygous MTHFR C677T, and abnormal endometrial function test. MFI with high DNA fragmentation and pericentric inversion on chromosome 9.
It does? Somehow missed that. Maybe they just haven't been as shady about it.
I did, too. And yes, I think it applies to commercial forums in general. Let me see if I can find it.
I did find it in the TCF TOU, you're absolutely right. I guess what put me off TB was the way they went about it at the time. I guess it's a moot point if it's standard for commercial forums!
I totally don't blame any of you. If I wasn't a moderator, I'd probably just be done with forums. This is all extra tiring when this part of IF is supposed to be fun.
If you guys decide not to move, I'll stand by you. Like I said, I won't go anywhere. If you want to look into moving to a bigger forum, let me know.
I've been looking for other forums... Baby Center's IF board Is "TTC: The Next Level" but I find their forums hard to read and sooooo big I think we would be lost and hard to actually make connections.
Post by mommybumblebee on Jun 1, 2017 18:17:21 GMT -5
I haven't followed any of the drama so I honestly have no idea what is going on. I'm cool doing whatever everyone else wants. Maybe since there's so much uncertainty someone should be the point person and get contact info for everybody? Like an email address? Then if everything goes south we'll have a way to tell everyone where to go to meet back up?
I haven't followed any of the drama so I honestly have no idea what is going on. I'm cool doing whatever everyone else wants. Maybe since there's so much uncertainty someone should be the point person and get contact info for everybody? Like an email address? Then if everything goes south we'll have a way to tell everyone where to go to meet back up?
I have a proboards only email that I don't mind sharing with lemonliz to use as a contact point.
I don't think I'm moving, at least not now. I might feel different when/if we can do something, but I'll probably just hang out here until this place dies and then take a break from the boards. Or take a break before this place dies. It's getting too hard to watch people graduate when I can't do anything, and I'm happy for people who graduate, because that's what's supposed to happen, but it's still hard. I think joining a new board when I'm feeling stuck is the wrong thing to do for me right now. Maybe I'll join there when/if we can transfer and if this place is dead, but not now. For everyone leaving, it's been great getting to know you, and best of luck in getting off this IF island. 🙂
Girl, I totally feel you on that. Like, I feel you so hard. Watching friends pass you by is perhaps the hardest part about a community like this.
But just know that no matter where you are in this process, there's always a place for you. Whether it be here if you want to stay here, or the other board if you'd like to join. Nobody should ever feel like there isn't a place for them.
Married 10 years. DX: AMA, DOR, endo, one tube, +NK, homozygous MTHFR C677T, and abnormal endometrial function test. MFI with high DNA fragmentation and pericentric inversion on chromosome 9.
I've been looking for other forums... Baby Center's IF board Is "TTC: The Next Level" but I find their forums hard to read and sooooo big I think we would be lost and hard to actually make connections.
That sounds like a terrible straight to video movie sequel.
Does anyone else have an idea of where to go? This place is DEAD and I don't know if it is because no one is left or there are no posts to respond to...
Saw RE 1/11/17 HSG x 2 - 2nd revealed both tubes open and arcuate uterus Cycle #1-2 Femara 5mg + TI = Cancelled - poor response Cycle #3 - Femara 7.5mg and Dex 0.5mg - another poor response - waiting to see when I O
Does anyone else have an idea of where to go? This place is DEAD and I don't know if it is because no one is left or there are no posts to respond to...
I'm still here for a few reasons. Not sure for how long.
Saw RE 1/11/17 HSG x 2 - 2nd revealed both tubes open and arcuate uterus Cycle #1-2 Femara 5mg + TI = Cancelled - poor response Cycle #3 - Femara 7.5mg and Dex 0.5mg - another poor response - waiting to see when I O
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