Post by sweetsurprise on Jun 4, 2015 10:24:45 GMT -5
I think abortion is totally different than circumcision. Yes they are choices you make that involve your body but a circumcision doesn't result in a baby.
I think abortion is totally different than circumcision. Yes they are choices you make that involve your body but a circumcision doesn't result in a baby.
Technically an abortion doesn't result in a baby either. I know what you mean, though, and I agree. Comparing the two is kind of hard.
I can get on board with this. I don't say these things but I know gay people that say "this is gay"
I feel like it's a little different to use to word if you actually are gay, but still, there are plenty of words that mean stupid or silly without having to use gay, you know? We're all adults here. Let's use our vocabularies.
i agree. I don't say either but just something to toss in
I would never tell a grown man to have a circumcision but I did make that choice for my son.
Hm. Well, I'd say that since a woman wanting an abortion is usually of a certain age, she is in ownership of her body and able to make choices about her future, whereas a tiny baby is not. The ownership of the body thing can be disputed, of course, in that everyone should always have bodily autonomy, but you get what I mean. Right? Good question.
I circumcised my son because I knew DH would have wanted me to.
Hahaha I told him he's amazing and so is his brother but as parents they're too much but they're amazing grandparents. I don't want my daughter being raised in their church... then he proceeded to tell me how my parents failed at parenting.
I made my will like immediately after Q was born because I KNOW that if something happens to me, my ILs will fight my parents in court for him.
I'm afraid it would turn into that anyway. I'm not really sure what to do. Uprooting her would be the best thing for her. And I don't really want any of my brother's raising her...one of them is in a shitty marriage. The other one is selfish as fuck. So until one of the younger two of our brothers gets their shit together. There's only one other choice...
I would never tell a grown man to have a circumcision but I did make that choice for my son.
Hm. Well, I'd say that since a woman wanting an abortion is usually of a certain age, she is in ownership of her body and able to make choices about her future, whereas a tiny baby is not. The ownership of the body thing can be disputed, of course, in that everyone should always have bodily autonomy, but you get what I mean. Right? Good question.
I circumcised my son because I knew DH would have wanted me to.
I don't agree that they are the same thing either, and the circumcision issue seems to be more about consent than anything. I think the argument could be made that parents forcing a teen child to have a circumcision is in some ways similar to parents forcing a teen child to have an abortion. Otherwise, though, I don't think they are the same.
From what I've read open relationships increases the sex drive between both partners because of the chase. Especially in women. The feeling of being desired and wanted can bring out another side in the woman with her primary partner that intensifies their passion.
I'm still not down with it. At all. I'd rather have the most boring sex life ever but have my husband 100% committed to me and never touch another woman.
Post by crawford411 on Jun 4, 2015 10:58:07 GMT -5
Not sure if this is a UO, but when my child reaches a certain age (probably around 14) we will start having the sex talk and birth control talk frequently. And if she wants to be on birth control, I will consider it. I would rather my teen daughter be having safe sex than feel like she couldn't get contraception and do it unsafely and end up prenant/with an STI.
But I hope that she waits until college like I did.
I get really offended by special need terms being used in a derogatory way. I definitely use the term as a secondary characteristic, not a first description as WWF said.
Not sure if this is a UO, but when my child reaches a certain age (probably around 14) we will start having the sex talk and birth control talk frequently. And if she wants to be on birth control, I will consider it. I would rather my teen daughter be having safe sex than feel like she couldn't get contraception and do it unsafely and end up prenant/with an STI.
But I hope that she waits until college like I did.
Not an UO from my end. We will teach S that protection is his responsibility, and that he should always want to protect himself and others. Oh, and all that "respect" stuff.
And now I'll go chug a bottle of wine because my baby will have sex one dayyyyyyyyy!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (JK... It really doesn't make me sad. It's part of life.)
My rainbow arrived 10/15/14.
5 cycles of "TTC" - 3 intentional, 2 not so intentional. 5 BFPs.
TFMC 08.02.13 at 19+ weeks. Everyday I grieve for my little Olive.
I am disgusted by severely obese people with no underlying medical issue. I just don't understand how you can let yourself get that big and not do something about it.
I also have my own weight issues, so that could play into it. I'm pretty sure I have a touch of body dysmorphia.
I know they aren't politically correct but I don't think they are horrible to say.
I do not agree. I think if you want to say something is stupid, just say it's stupid. No need to use words that people identify with or have a long history of derogatory meaning to express yourself. I'm sensitive to the gay thing because of my brother, but I stopped saying that stuff a long time before he came out. If one gay person tells me they feel like the use of the word gay in that way makes them feel dehumanized, then that's enough for me. I don't know what it's like to be gay. I know not everyone feels this way.
And I'm not trying to police anyone's language, but if we're hanging out, I would ask that you just not use the word that way around me. And if you can't stop, we don't hang. It's simple.
I think it depends on context nicb13. But retarded can be very offensive to those with special needs. It makes it seem like such a bad thing, when really, it's just a different way if living. People assume those with special needs don't understand the word when it's used. Many resent their own disabilities and hearing it can enforce it in a very bad way.
I know they aren't politically correct but I don't think they are horrible to say.
I do not agree. I think if you want to say something is stupid, just say it's stupid. No need to use words that people identify with or have a long history of derogatory meaning to express yourself. I'm sensitive to the gay thing because of my brother, but I stopped saying that stuff a long time before he came out.
I totally get where you are coming from. My best friend is a gay dude. We've always been around gay people that use "that's gay" all the time so I guess it's never been an issue in my circle, which isn't an excuse to use a derogatory term but that's the reality for me. We actually know a TON of gay people and I've never been uncomfortable using the term "gay", even being funny about it. It's not something we tip toe around.
I think it depends on context nicb13. But retarded can be very offensive to those with special needs. It makes it seem like such a bad thing, when really, it's just a different way if living. People assume those with special needs don't understand the word when it's used. Many resent their own disabilities and hearing it can enforce it in a very bad way.
Oh I know how offensive it can be! I realize that 100%. I guess this is my FFTC then. I don't go around saying "that's retarded" but DH and I do say it when he and I are talking.
I do not agree. I think if you want to say something is stupid, just say it's stupid. No need to use words that people identify with or have a long history of derogatory meaning to express yourself. I'm sensitive to the gay thing because of my brother, but I stopped saying that stuff a long time before he came out.
I totally get where you are coming from. My best friend is a gay dude. We've always been around gay people that use "that's gay" all the time so I guess it's never been an issue in my circle, which isn't an excuse to use a derogatory term but that's the reality for me. We actually know a TON of gay people and I've never been uncomfortable using the term "gay", even being funny about it. It's not something we tip toe around.
I respect your opinion on this.
I don't really "tiptoe," I will definitely say something is gay if it is ACTUALLY gay, like a dude prancing around at pride in a feather boa. I just don't look at something stupid and say "oh that's gay." I know some gay men who are okay with it too. I just am not.
Also, I joined a LLL local facebook group and they encourage women to set their alarm to pump multiple times in the MOTN. I breastfeed and pump, but I think it's crazy to expect a woman to pump all day at work AND to wake up and pump that many times in the MOTN. At one point do you stop and take care of yourself? Is BM worth all of that sacrifice?
I totally get where you are coming from. My best friend is a gay dude. We've always been around gay people that use "that's gay" all the time so I guess it's never been an issue in my circle, which isn't an excuse to use a derogatory term but that's the reality for me. We actually know a TON of gay people and I've never been uncomfortable using the term "gay", even being funny about it. It's not something we tip toe around.
I respect your opinion on this.
I don't really "tiptoe," I will definitely say something is gay if it is ACTUALLY gay, like a dude prancing around at pride in a feather boa. I just don't look at something stupid and say "oh that's gay." I know some gay men who are okay with it too. I just am not.
So you would refer to a gay guy prancing around as "gay"?! That's what he is so there's nothing wrong with that!
I just don't think the word "gay" is a bad word, like the n word, so I have no problem saying it when referring to something that is stupid. In fact, it's the same to me as using "stupid".
Also, I joined a LLL local facebook group and they encourage women to set their alarm to pump multiple times in the MOTN. I breastfeed and pump, but I think it's crazy to expect a woman to pump all day at work AND to wake up and pump that many times in the MOTN. At one point do you stop and take care of yourself? Is BM worth all of that sacrifice?
I don't really "tiptoe," I will definitely say something is gay if it is ACTUALLY gay, like a dude prancing around at pride in a feather boa. I just don't look at something stupid and say "oh that's gay." I know some gay men who are okay with it too. I just am not.
So you would refer to a gay guy prancing around as "gay"?! That's what he is so there's nothing wrong with that!
I just don't think the word "gay" is a bad word, like the n word, so I have no problem saying it when referring to something that is stupid. In fact, it's the same to me as using "stupid".
That's what I'm saying! He's gay, so yes, I'd be like, "lol wow, so gay." But the rest of what you say I don't agree with. Shrug.
Also, I joined a LLL local facebook group and they encourage women to set their alarm to pump multiple times in the MOTN. I breastfeed and pump, but I think it's crazy to expect a woman to pump all day at work AND to wake up and pump that many times in the MOTN. At one point do you stop and take care of yourself? Is BM worth all of that sacrifice?
LLL is insane. I do not prescribe to the "give up your life for the sacred path of breastfeeding" thing they push.
I made my will like immediately after Q was born because I KNOW that if something happens to me, my ILs will fight my parents in court for him.
I'm afraid it would turn into that anyway. I'm not really sure what to do. Uprooting her would be the best thing for her. And I don't really want any of my brother's raising her...one of them is in a shitty marriage. The other one is selfish as fuck. So until one of the younger two of our brothers gets their shit together. There's only one other choice...
It's hard, right? My parents are 10 years younger and married, H's parents are divorced, FIL is remarried and has money, but if anything happens to us, we want the kids to be raised by MIL who is unmarried and makes the least amount of money. Realistically, we'd prefer my SIL to take them, but she's single and travels for work.
What it's really all about is making the best decision for the kids and the most sound decision that a court would agree with because my asshole mother will try to get her clutches on them even though she KNOWS I would want them to stay with MIL and H's extended family.
I know they aren't politically correct but I don't think they are horrible to say.
I do not agree. I think if you want to say something is stupid, just say it's stupid. No need to use words that people identify with or have a long history of derogatory meaning to express yourself. I'm sensitive to the gay thing because of my brother, but I stopped saying that stuff a long time before he came out. If one gay person tells me they feel like the use of the word gay in that way makes them feel dehumanized, then that's enough for me. I don't know what it's like to be gay. I know not everyone feels this way.
And I'm not trying to police anyone's language, but if we're hanging out, I would ask that you just not use the word that way around me. And if you can't stop, we don't hang. It's simple.
I missed this post. That statement would stick with me too. But I haven't EVER had a gay person say something like that to me. Honestly, it's a little over the top BUT I'm not gay and I won't pretend even for a second that I know what their day to day life is like. I don't.
I totally get where you are coming from. My best friend is a gay dude. We've always been around gay people that use "that's gay" all the time so I guess it's never been an issue in my circle, which isn't an excuse to use a derogatory term but that's the reality for me. We actually know a TON of gay people and I've never been uncomfortable using the term "gay", even being funny about it. It's not something we tip toe around.
I respect your opinion on this.
I don't really "tiptoe," I will definitely say something is gay if it is ACTUALLY gay, like a dude prancing around at pride in a feather boa. I just don't look at something stupid and say "oh that's gay." I know some gay men who are okay with it too. I just am not.
This. Not offensive when it's accurate. Offensive when I am using it to insult someone. Because then the intention is to insult using a term that shouldn't be an insult. You are saying "gay" or "retard" is "less than". I am not okay with that.
Post by amandajean12 on Jun 4, 2015 11:17:44 GMT -5
I think the Duggar drama is a total over reaction. I do NOT think that what he did is ok. Not in the slightest. But I think it's being blown out of proportion as an overall "scandal" because the family is outspoken about their beliefs. I don't watch the show, but it seems some people really enjoy pointing out that this family has flaws. All families have flaws, and just because a family values religion doesn't make them immune to kids having issues.
So you would refer to a gay guy prancing around as "gay"?! That's what he is so there's nothing wrong with that!
I just don't think the word "gay" is a bad word, like the n word, so I have no problem saying it when referring to something that is stupid. In fact, it's the same to me as using "stupid".
That's what I'm saying! He's gay, so yes, I'd be like, "lol wow, so gay." But the rest of what you say I don't agree with. Shrug.
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