::UO::

[happyin14]

Jun 4, 2015 11:14:15 GMT -5 nicb13 said:

Jun 4, 2015 11:12:18 GMT -5 apk4 said:

Also, I joined a LLL local facebook group and they encourage women to set their alarm to pump multiple times in the MOTN. I breastfeed and pump, but I think it's crazy to expect a woman to pump all day at work AND to wake up and pump that many times in the MOTN. At one point do you stop and take care of yourself? Is BM worth all of that sacrifice?

Some people think it is. I don't.

When I was having supply issues, one of the reasons was because LO wasn't eating MOTN and was sleeping really well. When the advice was to wake up and pump, I just couldn't. It's one of the reasons I started weaning.

[apk4]

Jun 4, 2015 11:17:44 GMT -5 amandajean12 said:

I think the Duggar drama is a total over reaction. I do NOT think that what he did is ok. Not in the slightest. But I think it's being blown out of proportion as an overall "scandal" because the family is outspoken about their beliefs. I don't watch the show, but it seems some people really enjoy pointing out that this family has flaws. All families have flaws, and just because a family values religion doesn't make them immune to kids having issues.

Yeah I think this is an UO. I think the Duggars are disgusting.

[windwithfingers]

Jun 4, 2015 11:18:14 GMT -5 nicb13 said:

Jun 4, 2015 11:14:32 GMT -5 windwithfingers said:

That's what I'm saying! He's gay, so yes, I'd be like, "lol wow, so gay." But the rest of what you say I don't agree with. Shrug.

But you're making fun of him.....

No, I'm pointing out that what's he's doing is a stereotypically gay activity. How is that worse than what you do?

[happyin14]

Jun 4, 2015 11:17:44 GMT -5 amandajean12 said:

I think the Duggar drama is a total over reaction. I do NOT think that what he did is ok. Not in the slightest. But I think it's being blown out of proportion as an overall "scandal" because the family is outspoken about their beliefs. I don't watch the show, but it seems some people really enjoy pointing out that this family has flaws. All families have flaws, and just because a family values religion doesn't make them immune to kids having issues.

I don't think it is over blown at all. I think they were allowed to sweep it under the rug BECAUSE of their beliefs. I heard an interview today with them that said the girls are being MORE victimized by media than by their brother. This family NEEDS to get a grip.

[apk4]

Jun 4, 2015 11:19:06 GMT -5 happyin14 said:

Jun 4, 2015 11:14:15 GMT -5 nicb13 said:

Some people think it is. I don't.

When I was having supply issues, one of the reasons was because LO wasn't eating MOTN and was sleeping really well. When the advice was to wake up and pump, I just couldn't. It's one of the reasons I started weaning.

If I get to that point, I will wean. As moms we already do so very little for ourselves, and it's crazy to me to suggest that we shouldn't even sleep in order to provide for our kids. 

[nicb13]

Jun 4, 2015 11:19:56 GMT -5 windwithfingers said:

Jun 4, 2015 11:18:14 GMT -5 nicb13 said:

But you're making fun of him.....

No, I'm pointing out that what's he's doing is a stereotypically gay activity. How is that worse than what you do?

I never said it was worse, or better, or anything. We won't agree on this and I did admit that it's not "politically correct" of me to say something is "gay", but I say it. I guess it's a confession. And I won't say it around you

[pnwlover12]

Jun 4, 2015 11:17:44 GMT -5 amandajean12 said:

I think the Duggar drama is a total over reaction. I do NOT think that what he did is ok. Not in the slightest. But I think it's being blown out of proportion as an overall "scandal" because the family is outspoken about their beliefs. I don't watch the show, but it seems some people really enjoy pointing out that this family has flaws. All families have flaws, and just because a family values religion doesn't make them immune to kids having issues.

Oh, what the fuck...

[amandajean12]

Jun 4, 2015 11:20:51 GMT -5 happyin14 said:

Jun 4, 2015 11:17:44 GMT -5 amandajean12 said:

I think the Duggar drama is a total over reaction. I do NOT think that what he did is ok. Not in the slightest. But I think it's being blown out of proportion as an overall "scandal" because the family is outspoken about their beliefs. I don't watch the show, but it seems some people really enjoy pointing out that this family has flaws. All families have flaws, and just because a family values religion doesn't make them immune to kids having issues.

I don't think it is over blown at all. I think they were allowed to sweep it under the rug BECAUSE of their beliefs. I heard an interview today with them that said the girls are being MORE victimized by media than by their brother. This family NEEDS to get a grip.

Yeah... I get why people feel that way. But in my experience working with juveniles, at least around here, a 14 year old with 4th degree sexual assault would likely get treatment and a sealed record regardless of who they were. 

[pnwlover12]

Jun 4, 2015 11:19:56 GMT -5 windwithfingers said:

Jun 4, 2015 11:18:14 GMT -5 nicb13 said:

But you're making fun of him.....

No, I'm pointing out that what's he's doing is a stereotypically gay activity. How is that worse than what you do?

It's not...which is her point, I think? It's basically the same thing right? But your version is ok?

[windwithfingers]

Jun 4, 2015 11:17:44 GMT -5 amandajean12 said:

I think the Duggar drama is a total over reaction. I do NOT think that what he did is ok. Not in the slightest. But I think it's being blown out of proportion as an overall "scandal" because the family is outspoken about their beliefs. I don't watch the show, but it seems some people really enjoy pointing out that this family has flaws. All families have flaws, and just because a family values religion doesn't make them immune to kids having issues.

Definitely a UO. I don't think the outcry about a kid whose family has become a weird cultural focus molesting his sisters and having it covered up is an overreaction. I think molesting your 5 year old sister is more than just "issues."

[amandajean12]

Jun 4, 2015 11:21:28 GMT -5 pnwlover12 said:

Jun 4, 2015 11:17:44 GMT -5 amandajean12 said:

I think the Duggar drama is a total over reaction. I do NOT think that what he did is ok. Not in the slightest. But I think it's being blown out of proportion as an overall "scandal" because the family is outspoken about their beliefs. I don't watch the show, but it seems some people really enjoy pointing out that this family has flaws. All families have flaws, and just because a family values religion doesn't make them immune to kids having issues.

Oh, what the fuck...

I was trying to give you an active UO! 

[nicb13]

Jun 4, 2015 11:03:44 GMT -5 apk4 said:

I'm so going to get flamed.

I am disgusted by severely obese people with no underlying medical issue. I just don't understand how you can let yourself get that big and not do something about it.

I also have my own weight issues, so that could play into it. I'm pretty sure I have a touch of body dysmorphia.

No flames from me. I agree.

[happyin14]

Jun 4, 2015 11:22:07 GMT -5 amandajean12 said:

Jun 4, 2015 11:20:51 GMT -5 happyin14 said:

I don't think it is over blown at all. I think they were allowed to sweep it under the rug BECAUSE of their beliefs. I heard an interview today with them that said the girls are being MORE victimized by media than by their brother. This family NEEDS to get a grip.

Yeah... I get why people feel that way. But in my experience working with juveniles, at least around here, a 14 year old with 4th degree sexual assault would likely get treatment and a sealed record regardless of who they were. 

Is that what happened here? I thought it wasn't actually investigated and dropped?

[amandajean12]

Jun 4, 2015 11:24:42 GMT -5 happyin14 said:

Jun 4, 2015 11:22:07 GMT -5 amandajean12 said:

Yeah... I get why people feel that way. But in my experience working with juveniles, at least around here, a 14 year old with 4th degree sexual assault would likely get treatment and a sealed record regardless of who they were. 

Is that what happened here? I thought it wasn't actually investigated and dropped?

I think there was an issue with the prosecution, because of who was doing the investigation having their own issues.

I'm just saying that in the end, if it WAS prosecuted, I don't think the outcome would have been much different. The public still wouldn't have known about it.

[windwithfingers]

Jun 4, 2015 11:22:20 GMT -5 pnwlover12 said:

Jun 4, 2015 11:19:56 GMT -5 windwithfingers said:

No, I'm pointing out that what's he's doing is a stereotypically gay activity. How is that worse than what you do?

It's not...which is her point, I think? It's basically the same thing right? But your version is ok?

I don't think it's the same thing at all. You're at gay pride, dude is in a boa, I would say, yes, that's gay. Maybe my intent doesn't matter, but he's participating in a gay pride parade doing something stereotypically gay. Pointing out that something is part of gay culture isn't the same as equating it with something you think is silly or stupid. And to say that gay = stupid is not right, imo.

And like I said, it's cool, I'm not policing anyone's language. You do you.

[happyin14]

Jun 4, 2015 11:23:53 GMT -5 nicb13 said:

Jun 4, 2015 11:03:44 GMT -5 apk4 said:

I'm so going to get flamed.

I am disgusted by severely obese people with no underlying medical issue. I just don't understand how you can let yourself get that big and not do something about it.

I also have my own weight issues, so that could play into it. I'm pretty sure I have a touch of body dysmorphia.

No flames from me. I agree.

i sort of agree. I just think that there are few people that this applies to.... In many cases there are underlying conditions- physical or emotional.

[nicb13]

Jun 4, 2015 11:26:27 GMT -5 happyin14 said:

Jun 4, 2015 11:23:53 GMT -5 nicb13 said:

No flames from me. I agree.

i sort of agree. I just think that there are few people that this applies to.... In many cases there are underlying conditions- physical or emotional.

Then get some help and get your weight under control. So easy to do right?!

[happyin14]

Jun 4, 2015 11:25:55 GMT -5 amandajean12 said:

Jun 4, 2015 11:24:42 GMT -5 happyin14 said:

Is that what happened here? I thought it wasn't actually investigated and dropped?

I think there was an issue with the prosecution, because of who was doing the investigation having their own issues.

I'm just saying that in the end, if it WAS prosecuted, I don't think the outcome would have been much different. The public still wouldn't have known about it.

Then the family is using faith to explain why they didn't need to take the steps.

More than Josh (is that his name?) I am upset that their daughters didn't get any help/treatment because their brother was forgiven. That's the part that upsets me most.

[happyin14]

Jun 4, 2015 11:27:50 GMT -5 nicb13 said:

Jun 4, 2015 11:26:27 GMT -5 happyin14 said:

i sort of agree. I just think that there are few people that this applies to.... In many cases there are underlying conditions- physical or emotional.

Then get some help and get your weight under control. So easy to do right?!

Nope. Abuse, depression, etc. not an easy fix.

[pnwlover12]

Jun 4, 2015 11:26:01 GMT -5 windwithfingers said:

Jun 4, 2015 11:22:20 GMT -5 pnwlover12 said:

It's not...which is her point, I think? It's basically the same thing right? But your version is ok?

I don't think it's the same thing at all. You're at gay pride, dude is in a boa, I would say, yes, that's gay. Maybe my intent doesn't matter, but he's participating in a gay pride parade doing something stereotypically gay. Pointing out that something is part of gay culture isn't the same as equating it with something you think is silly or stupid. And to say that gay = stupid is not right, imo.

And like I said, it's cool, I'm not policing anyone's language. You do you.

I get both sides. Growing up in the 90s, the words gay and retarded were part of everyday use. It's hard to break those habits that can be offensive to others.

I will say though, that in my circle, it's the same as what nicb said, even my gay friends will say shit like "dude. Don't buy that. It's hella gay." It's almost used in an ironic way.

And the word retarded was a word before it was used to describe someone with a mental disability. I would never call someone with a LD a retard. Never.

[nicb13]

Jun 4, 2015 11:28:56 GMT -5 happyin14 said:

Jun 4, 2015 11:27:50 GMT -5 nicb13 said:

Then get some help and get your weight under control. So easy to do right?!

Nope. Abuse, depression, etc. not an easy fix.

Not easy, but possible. At least put forth some effort.

I think I have a bad taste in my mouth about this topic because of 2 people in my family. They are severely overweight, unhealthy but they "embrace" it and "love their curves". What that really means is they are too lazy to do anything about their weight so they try to make it a positive thing. One of them can barely get to work because she has so many problems due to her weight and the other one is just delusional.

[nicb13]

Jun 4, 2015 11:31:51 GMT -5 pnwlover12 said:

Jun 4, 2015 11:26:01 GMT -5 windwithfingers said:

I don't think it's the same thing at all. You're at gay pride, dude is in a boa, I would say, yes, that's gay. Maybe my intent doesn't matter, but he's participating in a gay pride parade doing something stereotypically gay. Pointing out that something is part of gay culture isn't the same as equating it with something you think is silly or stupid. And to say that gay = stupid is not right, imo.

And like I said, it's cool, I'm not policing anyone's language. You do you.

I get both sides. Growing up in the 90s, the words gay and retarded were part of everyday use. It's hard to break those habits that can be offensive to others.

I will say though, that in my circle, it's the same as what nicb said, even my gay friends will say shit like "dude. Don't buy that. It's hella gay." It's almost used in an ironic way.

And the word retarded was a word before it was used to describe someone with a mental disability. I would never call someone with a LD a retard. Never.

She says things so much better than I can.

[pnwlover12]

I thought yesterday, words were just words - and only we can give them power? Is that only true for fat/skinny?

[windwithfingers]

Jun 4, 2015 11:31:51 GMT -5 pnwlover12 said:

Jun 4, 2015 11:26:01 GMT -5 windwithfingers said:

I don't think it's the same thing at all. You're at gay pride, dude is in a boa, I would say, yes, that's gay. Maybe my intent doesn't matter, but he's participating in a gay pride parade doing something stereotypically gay. Pointing out that something is part of gay culture isn't the same as equating it with something you think is silly or stupid. And to say that gay = stupid is not right, imo.

And like I said, it's cool, I'm not policing anyone's language. You do you.

I get both sides. Growing up in the 90s, the words gay and retarded were part of everyday use. It's hard to break those habits that can be offensive to others.

I will say though, that in my circle, it's the same as what nicb said, even my gay friends will say shit like "dude. Don't buy that. It's hella gay." It's almost used in an ironic way.

And the word retarded was a word before it was used to describe someone with a mental disability. I would never call someone with a LD a retard. Never.

I most definitely used the word in high school and stuff. And alternately, in my circle, the gay men I know don't really appreciate the term being used that way. I know the old use of the word "retarded," but there are active campaigns out there by people with disabilities to stop using it. The word has changed and evolved and now it means something different. There are so many words to use. Why choose "retarded" as your hill to die on? (General you, not you.) I just ask people not to use the words around me, that's all. 

[mrsbabe614]

Jun 4, 2015 11:16:02 GMT -5 TheMooseIsLoose said:

Jun 4, 2015 10:41:14 GMT -5 mrsbabe614 said:

I'm afraid it would turn into that anyway. I'm not really sure what to do. Uprooting her would be the best thing for her. And I don't really want any of my brother's raising her...one of them is in a shitty marriage. The other one is selfish as fuck. So until one of the younger two of our brothers gets their shit together. There's only one other choice...

It's hard, right? My parents are 10 years younger and married, H's parents are divorced, FIL is remarried and has money, but if anything happens to us, we want the kids to be raised by MIL who is unmarried and makes the least amount of money.
Realistically, we'd prefer my SIL to take them, but she's single and travels for work.

What it's really all about is making the best decision for the kids and the most sound decision that a court would agree with because my asshole mother will try to get her clutches on them even though she KNOWS I would want them to stay with MIL and H's extended family.

Yeah. It is fucking hard. I've been struggling with it since before she was born. And I know that there's a small chance it's both of us and not all of us but if it is I want the person to be the best fucking parent. And that person I keep coming back to is not related to me in anyway. I know it would cause a huge problem with our families... We have life insurance though, money is no issue. 

[TheMooseIsLoose]

Jun 4, 2015 11:19:49 GMT -5 apk4 said:

Jun 4, 2015 11:17:44 GMT -5 amandajean12 said:

I think the Duggar drama is a total over reaction. I do NOT think that what he did is ok. Not in the slightest. But I think it's being blown out of proportion as an overall "scandal" because the family is outspoken about their beliefs. I don't watch the show, but it seems some people really enjoy pointing out that this family has flaws. All families have flaws, and just because a family values religion doesn't make them immune to kids having issues.

Yeah I think this is an UO. I think the Duggars are disgusting.

I totally missed the OP.

No. The Duggar's have made money and gained fame by portraying themselves as "conservative Christians" and shaming the LGBT community as if they're a group of twisted pedophiles while their own son molested 5yr old girls at the age of 15. They knew about it and swept it under the rug, which is a disservice to their daughters who were molested.

They're ignorant and every ounce of outrage is warranted because they've publicly declared themselves to be something that they're not.

I also think that it is inexcusable that there is a statute of limitations on this situation because a 15 year old a) should not feel attracted to a 5yr old, and b) he should have to be evaluated as a sexual predator to see if he is currently a threat to others.

[pnwlover12]

Also I'm not invested in this at all. I'm just pondering thoughts.

[windwithfingers]

Jun 4, 2015 11:35:07 GMT -5 pnwlover12 said:

I thought yesterday, words were just words - and only we can give them power? Is that only true for fat/skinny?

I definitely don't think words don't have power. But I think certain words have more than others. Depends on what it is.

[mrsbabe614]

Jun 4, 2015 11:17:44 GMT -5 amandajean12 said:

I think the Duggar drama is a total over reaction. I do NOT think that what he did is ok. Not in the slightest. But I think it's being blown out of proportion as an overall "scandal" because the family is outspoken about their beliefs. I don't watch the show, but it seems some people really enjoy pointing out that this family has flaws. All families have flaws, and just because a family values religion doesn't make them immune to kids having issues.

No I think the reason that is HAS blown up in their face is the detail that has surfaced about all of the hush hush things and what they think about the matter. They're public figures so they have it coming to them.

[pnwlover12]

Jun 4, 2015 11:35:08 GMT -5 windwithfingers said:

Jun 4, 2015 11:31:51 GMT -5 pnwlover12 said:

I get both sides. Growing up in the 90s, the words gay and retarded were part of everyday use. It's hard to break those habits that can be offensive to others.

I will say though, that in my circle, it's the same as what nicb said, even my gay friends will say shit like "dude. Don't buy that. It's hella gay." It's almost used in an ironic way.

And the word retarded was a word before it was used to describe someone with a mental disability. I would never call someone with a LD a retard. Never.

I most definitely used the word in high school and stuff. And alternately, in my circle, the gay men I know don't really appreciate the term being used that way. I know the old use of the word "retarded," but there are active campaigns out there by people with disabilities to stop using it. The word has changed and evolved and now it means something different. There are so many words to use. Why choose "retarded" as your hill to die on? (General you, not you.) I just ask people not to use the words around me, that's all. 

I get this. I don't want my kids to learn to say that's gay or that's retarded. I would be horrified.