Family Crap (rant, long, whiny, Dear Diary)
Jan 23, 2015 20:43:58 GMT -5
Post by MissMusic on Jan 23, 2015 20:43:58 GMT -5
So its another "my dad sucks" post. Question at end.
So its been a month since my dad has contacted us. I only note it because he was so in & out of my life for a long time, and I told him loooong ago that he needs to be in OR out with Lillian--none of this in between garbage. He said in Nov that he doesn't spend enough time with her, and wants to see her more.
So now its been a month since he's contacted us.
I admit that I am not a happy person around him. I can't seem to enjoy a conversation, or sometimes even be cordial. I'm not always polite. I try not to do it in front of L. He's just an annoying, terrible person and every moment with him is an eternity.
Over xmas, we spent a few days at his house and he did nothing with her. We went to a kid's museum, and he wandered off on his own. He was bored as shit. He was on his phone for a while, too. Then he wanted to take us out to lunch (how nice!) but he took us to a pub. Not a place for kids!! I told him this and he insisted...so we stayed. My kid ate nothing and eventually threw a tantrum and I had to leave with her so as not to ruin other peoples' lunch. He was annoyed. He wanted me to stay inside with her until she could pull it together. Um, no. The other patrons would not have appreciated that.
His big thing was he wanted to see his 2 grandkids (L, and 1 yr old cousin) together. Well, he refused to make a time that was convenient for all of us, so the kids only got to see each other for about 30min. My dad was in another room literally the entire time. Add up that he didn't want to take me to my mom's house (we had no car), he didn't play with her at all on day 1 and was working around the house instead, and then didn't call after that. (When Peanut was napping and Cousin was there, he played with Cousin. I was so mad for L).
I know I'm difficult and I don't like to give him as much time as he wants (because he wastes it). I DO try to make sure they have a relationship: we make cards and paint pictures for him and mail them off; we try to Skype (but he's bored with that too), and I text him photos. No reply.
---> READ HERE IF YOU SKIPPED THE TOP PART.
I'm over it, you guys. I'm about to cut him out of my life--again. I'm only on the fence because of L. I've accepted that he's never going to be the dad or granddad that I want him to be, but this is ridic. My mom calls 3 or 4 times per week. My dad doesn't call in a month, and he bitches about not seeing her. I bent over backwards to accommodate him and his shenanigans at xmas, and I get the silent treatment. L doesn't even ask about him anymore...she talked about him for maybe a week after xmas and then nothing.
Have I given him a fair shake? I'm not sure. Do I just not return his call, should he call again, and say fuck it? I want to protect L from what I went through with him. WWJ12D? Its bothering me to no end.
So its been a month since my dad has contacted us. I only note it because he was so in & out of my life for a long time, and I told him loooong ago that he needs to be in OR out with Lillian--none of this in between garbage. He said in Nov that he doesn't spend enough time with her, and wants to see her more.
So now its been a month since he's contacted us.
I admit that I am not a happy person around him. I can't seem to enjoy a conversation, or sometimes even be cordial. I'm not always polite. I try not to do it in front of L. He's just an annoying, terrible person and every moment with him is an eternity.
Over xmas, we spent a few days at his house and he did nothing with her. We went to a kid's museum, and he wandered off on his own. He was bored as shit. He was on his phone for a while, too. Then he wanted to take us out to lunch (how nice!) but he took us to a pub. Not a place for kids!! I told him this and he insisted...so we stayed. My kid ate nothing and eventually threw a tantrum and I had to leave with her so as not to ruin other peoples' lunch. He was annoyed. He wanted me to stay inside with her until she could pull it together. Um, no. The other patrons would not have appreciated that.
His big thing was he wanted to see his 2 grandkids (L, and 1 yr old cousin) together. Well, he refused to make a time that was convenient for all of us, so the kids only got to see each other for about 30min. My dad was in another room literally the entire time. Add up that he didn't want to take me to my mom's house (we had no car), he didn't play with her at all on day 1 and was working around the house instead, and then didn't call after that. (When Peanut was napping and Cousin was there, he played with Cousin. I was so mad for L).
I know I'm difficult and I don't like to give him as much time as he wants (because he wastes it). I DO try to make sure they have a relationship: we make cards and paint pictures for him and mail them off; we try to Skype (but he's bored with that too), and I text him photos. No reply.
---> READ HERE IF YOU SKIPPED THE TOP PART.
I'm over it, you guys. I'm about to cut him out of my life--again. I'm only on the fence because of L. I've accepted that he's never going to be the dad or granddad that I want him to be, but this is ridic. My mom calls 3 or 4 times per week. My dad doesn't call in a month, and he bitches about not seeing her. I bent over backwards to accommodate him and his shenanigans at xmas, and I get the silent treatment. L doesn't even ask about him anymore...she talked about him for maybe a week after xmas and then nothing.
Have I given him a fair shake? I'm not sure. Do I just not return his call, should he call again, and say fuck it? I want to protect L from what I went through with him. WWJ12D? Its bothering me to no end.