I would like to propose a clikii pole to see what category each notch falls under: Ride or die reg: the reg that are clinging to PB, coffee and hugs Standard /basic reg: you kinda go here and you kinda go elsewhere, notches know you but you think they don't Dual purpose reg: the ones that successfully manage both notch groups and are clearly winning at life. Old Reg: notches that jumped ship and only come to PB for dramz Geriatric Regs: Keelyd that was supposed to be a laughing face...
Can there be an IDGAF option
lol but seriously, most of the PB regs aren't on FB so they only get one option. We need something more because I'm here but it's not just for coffee and hugs.
New Reg: PB reg that really shouldn't be called new regs but just regs
There will be some notches that do not fall under a category. We will call them Special Snowflake Reg- and provide explanation.
My rainbow arrived 10/15/14.
5 cycles of "TTC" - 3 intentional, 2 not so intentional. 5 BFPs.
TFMC 08.02.13 at 19+ weeks. Everyday I grieve for my little Olive.
The scissor thing was very efficient. I may buy a bunch to keep from the 99 cent store. Easier than bagging that shit up. Heh heh.. See what I did there?
Still waiting for kellrr to drop this juicy FFFC on us... C'mon you said last week that you would post it today
You're right!
I did say that, I was just going to lay low after the today. In any event, I would have to post and run now, and I know how awful that is. I do think it would provoke spirited debate. Oh hell, I'll go for it: DH and I fight in front of DS. I'm not happy about it, but I justify it for a couple reasons and I'm looking for a better solution. Reason 1. The baby is asleep about 1 hour of our time together most days, so we don't have time to discuss everything away from him. And if I we don't work it out then, DH accuses me of bringing up old stuff when I bring it up later, even if we never resolved it when it first came up. 2. I don't want DS to think either of us is a doormat because one of us doesn't say anything back. Like I said, I wanted to get this out there as much to get people's opinions on why you should or shouldn't argue in front your children, and also ideas on how to deal with issues that come up in your marriage without having to fight in front of your kids.
My rainbow arrived 10/15/14.
5 cycles of "TTC" - 3 intentional, 2 not so intentional. 5 BFPs.
TFMC 08.02.13 at 19+ weeks. Everyday I grieve for my little Olive.
I did say that, I was just going to lay low after the today. In any event, I would have to post and run now, and I know how awful that is. I do think it would provoke spirited debate. Oh hell, I'll go for it: DH and I fight in front of DS. I'm not happy about it, but I justify it for a couple reasons and I'm looking for a better solution. Reason 1. The baby is asleep about 1 hour of our time together most days, so we don't have time to discuss everything away from him. And if I we don't work it out then, DH accuses me of bringing up old stuff when I bring it up later, even if we never resolved it when it first came up. 2. I don't want DS to think either of us is a doormat because one of us doesn't say anything back. Like I said, I wanted to get this out there as much to get people's opinions on why you should or shouldn't argue in front your children, and also ideas on how to deal with issues that come up in your marriage without having to fight in front of your kids.
When C is older, I won't do it. We did it once in front of J - about 3 weeks before we lost him. So he was almost 3 years old... Anyway, I started crying (because I do when I am angry) and it made J cry. MH swore J didn't really understand and then we both saw that he clearly did. I'll NEVER forget the look on his face. But. My situation is super unique.
I did say that, I was just going to lay low after the today. In any event, I would have to post and run now, and I know how awful that is. I do think it would provoke spirited debate. Oh hell, I'll go for it: DH and I fight in front of DS. I'm not happy about it, but I justify it for a couple reasons and I'm looking for a better solution. Reason 1. The baby is asleep about 1 hour of our time together most days, so we don't have time to discuss everything away from him. And if I we don't work it out then, DH accuses me of bringing up old stuff when I bring it up later, even if we never resolved it when it first came up. 2. I don't want DS to think either of us is a doormat because one of us doesn't say anything back. Like I said, I wanted to get this out there as much to get people's opinions on why you should or shouldn't argue in front your children, and also ideas on how to deal with issues that come up in your marriage without having to fight in front of your kids.
I'm all about not fighting in front of the kids. My parents fought with me literally, physically in between them a lot and it was awful. DH's parents fought a lot too. We are going to do our best to present a unified front when DD or any future kids are around. I think it's possible to temporarily concede the point and agree to discuss something later without anyone looking like a doormat.
To be fair we are both pretty easy going and don't fight often but if that changes I hope we will be able to stick to our plans on this. We've also agreed to avoid using the phrase "just wait until your dad/mom hears about this" as we feel it takes authority away from the parent saying it. A little off topic but this made me think of it for some reason.
I would not argue in front of my children. My parents never did and my "definition" of marriage life is much healthier than H who did see his parents argue as a toddler before they split. He agrees with me 100% on keeping discussion behind closed doors. It is not easy but I feel strongly about it. I have never heard my dad raise his voice with us or my mother. I now as an adult can tell if they are upset with each other but they still do not argue with each other in public.
I want that for us, I do not mind staying quiet if I disagree with something and talking about it later. H knows me enough to know if I am upset without resorting to words. It is not easy, and I hope we can strive to maintain our commitment.
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