I feel like cash bars are such a geographical thing. Our wedding was a toonie bar and everyone was thanking us for the cheap drinks. I have never in my life been to an open bar wedding, or know anyone who had one.
I've been to weddings in pretty much every region of the US, and not one was a cash bar. Some (like mine) were beer/wine only, and some were truly full service, but they were all open.
I hate tipping. I mean, I do it, but I always tip the same amount, so just add it to my bill so I don't have to think about it. I also don't want to worry about which situations warrant tipping and which don't.
Yes. I liked the way tipping was handled in Europe much better. 10% was a generous tip. Service wasn't quite as good, but I don't need a waiter to pick my table for me or check and see "how everything is tasting" to feel like I had a good experience.
Edit to add that I do tip well enough- usually round up from whatever 20% is- but I just wish servers/bartenders/etc were paid more so we didn't have to.
If bartenders and servers were paid a livable wage, food and beverage prices would skyrocket. I mean, is a 5-10 dollar tip for you really break the bank?
I just don't understand the tipping hate. I was in the restaurant business for almost 15 years, so maybe that's why I tip everyone.
Post by easilyunamused on Jul 22, 2016 12:35:21 GMT -5
Cash bars are tacky. You wouldn't charge your guests for their food, so budget in for at least wine/beer. The reception is the thank you to your guests who are celebrating your marriage.
With that said, I'd much rather go to a cash bar, then a dry wedding.
Cash bars are tacky. You wouldn't charge your guests for their food, so budget in for at least wine/beer. The reception is the thank you to your guests who are celebrating your marriage.
With that said, I'd much rather go to a cash bar, then a dry wedding.
Perk of marrying a recovering alcoholic who invited a bunch of guests who are also in recovery - much lower bar tab We did provide a really kick ass coffee station and lemonade/tea/juice bar as a booze alternative.
Cash bars are tacky. You wouldn't charge your guests for their food, so budget in for at least wine/beer. The reception is the thank you to your guests who are celebrating your marriage.
With that said, I'd much rather go to a cash bar, then a dry wedding.
My sister got married in May and they had a dry wedding.....and it was a potluck.
Yes. I liked the way tipping was handled in Europe much better. 10% was a generous tip. Service wasn't quite as good, but I don't need a waiter to pick my table for me or check and see "how everything is tasting" to feel like I had a good experience.
Edit to add that I do tip well enough- usually round up from whatever 20% is- but I just wish servers/bartenders/etc were paid more so we didn't have to.
If bartenders and servers were paid a livable wage, food and beverage prices would skyrocket. I mean, is a 5-10 dollar tip for you really break the bank?
I just don't understand the tipping hate. I was in the restaurant business for almost 15 years, so maybe that's why I tip everyone.
It's not that I don't want to pay for the service. I just would prefer that it is included in the bill so that servers get paid fairly regardless of whether the person they are serving is feeling generous or not, or if the person orders a filet mignon for dinner vs. a less expensive vegetarian dish.
I don't get the statement that food prices would skyrocket if servers were paid a livable wage. Yes, the prices would go up because my 20% tip would be included in the food price, but I am paying that anyway.
Post by andtheheartbreakers on Jul 22, 2016 12:43:10 GMT -5
I will add for my toonie bar wedding we did have one red and one white wine that was free, as well as one brand of beer - and of course all non alcoholic beverages. All the rest were toonies.
And the reason we couldn't afford to do open bar was because we blew our whole food/drink budget on an entire roasted pig stuffed with chickens. Also, because it isn't the norm where I live to have an open bar.
Cash bars are tacky. You wouldn't charge your guests for their food, so budget in for at least wine/beer. The reception is the thank you to your guests who are celebrating your marriage.
With that said, I'd much rather go to a cash bar, then a dry wedding.
My sister got married in May and they had a dry wedding.....and it was a potluck.
Too far.
A potluck wedding makes me rage. Especially if I'm traveling out of state to come to your wedding. How do you expect me to bring something when I'm flying in? And then have to pay for car/food/hotel?
It makes me stabby when couples try to do a diy cheap wedding, but really just push the cost on the guests.
My sister got married in May and they had a dry wedding.....and it was a potluck.
Too far.
A potluck wedding makes me rage. Especially if I'm traveling out of state to come to your wedding. How do you expect me to bring something when I'm flying in? And then have to pay for car/food/hotel?
It makes me stabby when couples try to do a diy cheap wedding, but really just push the cost on the guests.
In her defence they had a very small wedding and everyone there was local. But still, not ok. Have an intimate backyard wedding if you can't afford to have people there.
If bartenders and servers were paid a livable wage, food and beverage prices would skyrocket. I mean, is a 5-10 dollar tip for you really break the bank?
I just don't understand the tipping hate. I was in the restaurant business for almost 15 years, so maybe that's why I tip everyone.
It's not that I don't want to pay for the service. I just would prefer that it is included in the bill so that servers get paid fairly regardless of whether the person they are serving is feeling generous or not, or if the person orders a filet mignon for dinner vs. a less expensive vegetarian dish.
I don't get the statement that food prices would skyrocket if servers were paid a livable wage. Yes, the prices would go up because my 20% tip would be included in the food price, but I am paying that anyway.
So you'd rather the restaurant add 20% to your bill then have the servers get paid a standard wage? Cause those two things are very different. I would love if 20% was always added to my checks when I was serving.
Plus, servers make more money with tips then they would making $15/hr. Some busy bartending shifts I could walk with $200+. I would not want to put up with drunk assholes all night for 15/hr.
IDGAF if it's dry or cash bar or whatever. I'll have fun either way, and if they're buying me dinner, providing entertainment, etc, I'm not going to complain they didn't give me alcohol on top of that. You're hosting, your rules.
If it was your wedding and some rando cousin called you up complaining there was no vegan option or they didn't like your venue, you'd hang up on their ass. But being so intense about if/how they serve alcohol is ok? I don't get it, guys.
Complaining about the venue or not having a vegan dinner is completely different then having guests open their wallet to pay for something the couple hosting should take care of.
Would you be upset if they made you pay for your plate? Or didn't serve any food at all at?
Cash bars are tacky. You wouldn't charge your guests for their food, so budget in for at least wine/beer. The reception is the thank you to your guests who are celebrating your marriage.
With that said, I'd much rather go to a cash bar, then a dry wedding.
Yes to the bolded. I have been to 2 dry weddings. Guess what 2 receptions where I have stayed the least amount of time. Everyone just seemed to sit around. People-watching at the end of a reception with an open bar can be fantastic.
My wedding was an open bar and my parents opted to pick up the tip at the end of the night as well (they are notoriously very good tippers.) That fact was not communicated to many of the guests so most people tipped the bartender all night. He was great so I was happy that he got "extra" that night.
UO? I would SO much rather have free alcohol than a pig stuffed with chickens. HORK
You didn't actually see the pig stuffed with chickens, but it was all roasted together and so the chickens cooked in the pork juices. It was amazing.
ETA - I just realized that probably didn't make it sound better so you'll just have to take my word that it was delicious. Tomorrow is our 5 year wedding anniversary and we still hear from everyone about how amazing the pig and chicken were.
UO? I would SO much rather have free alcohol than a pig stuffed with chickens. HORK
You didn't actually see the pig stuffed with chickens, but it was all roasted together and so the chickens cooked in the pork juices. It was amazing.
ETA - I just realized that probably didn't make it sound better so you'll just have to take my word that it was delicious. Tomorrow is our 5 year wedding anniversary and we still hear from everyone about how amazing the pig and chicken were.
All I can see right now
ETA - I had a roasted pig at our welcome dinner, so I kid. My planners were less than thrilled with me, but it was a huge hit with MH. They just did it behind a little brick house
It's not that I don't want to pay for the service. I just would prefer that it is included in the bill so that servers get paid fairly regardless of whether the person they are serving is feeling generous or not, or if the person orders a filet mignon for dinner vs. a less expensive vegetarian dish.
I don't get the statement that food prices would skyrocket if servers were paid a livable wage. Yes, the prices would go up because my 20% tip would be included in the food price, but I am paying that anyway.
So you'd rather the restaurant add 20% to your bill then have the servers get paid a standard wage? Cause those two things are very different. I would love if 20% was always added to my checks when I was serving.
Plus, servers make more money with tips then they would making $15/hr. Some busy bartending shifts I could walk with $200+. I would not want to put up with drunk assholes all night for 15/hr.
I think restaurants should be responsible (I understand ultimately the customers are paying via higher prices) for paying their employees a livable wage and the customers can tip in addition to it. It's great that you were able to make a decent amount of money in tips at your job, but I imagine there are plenty of people working at bars/restaurants dealing with shitty, cheap customers, and since tip amount is proportional to food prices, working just as hard but serving inexpensive meals, and not making enough to make ends meet.
I will admit I have not worked in a restaurant so I'm probably making a lot of assumptions that may not be accurate. I am happy to deal with doing a bit of math and tipping if the current system is truly more beneficial to the servers. Just conceptually, I am opposed to the idea of restaurants paying their servers so little and the responsibility of bringing their earnings up to a reasonable level falling on the customers.
Complaining about the venue or not having a vegan dinner is completely different then having guests open their wallet to pay for something the couple hosting should take care of.
Would you be upset if they made you pay for your plate? Or didn't serve any food at all at?
I'd argue that food and alcohol are not equal comparisons. You don't really know why they chose to go dry or cash bar. Maybe they couldn't afford it. Maybe there's an addiction problem in the family or with a close friend. Maybe they wanted to spend their money on other things for the wedding. Maybe Memaw doesn't approve of alcohol and they were trying to respect her.
Now if they're inviting me to a wedding at a meal time and surprise no meal, I would be a little annoyed. If you can't afford to feed guests, mid-afternoon between meals would be more appropriate for you.
I dunno. If they mean enough to you or you know that they have a unique situation, you just...go and be happy for them no matter. You don't get in the car and bitch because you're not hammered.
I wouldn't automatically assume dry wedding or cash bar means cheap motherfuckers.
I have no problem with dry weddings. It is your choice as the couple hosting. I'm only talking about weddings that make me open my wallet even more then I already have with travel/hotel/gifts ect.
It boils down to me that I wanted to take care of my guests. I budgeted for what I could afford and make certain scarifies to make sure that happened.
If it was a good friend/family member I would still go and be happy to be there.
UO? I would SO much rather have free alcohol than a pig stuffed with chickens. HORK
You didn't actually see the pig stuffed with chickens, but it was all roasted together and so the chickens cooked in the pork juices. It was amazing.
ETA - I just realized that probably didn't make it sound better so you'll just have to take my word that it was delicious. Tomorrow is our 5 year wedding anniversary and we still hear from everyone about how amazing the pig and chicken were.
Haha, I don't know if "pork juices" is really helping your case.
Edited words again. WTF is going on with my brain today?
Haha, I don't know if "pork juices" is really help your case.
but bacon fat is pork juice so....
The chickens basically tasted like they were deep fried in bacon. In what (non-vegetarian/vegan) world is that a bad thing? If it's wrong I don't ever want to be right.
Yes. I liked the way tipping was handled in Europe much better. 10% was a generous tip. Service wasn't quite as good, but I don't need a waiter to pick my table for me or check and see "how everything is tasting" to feel like I had a good experience.
Edit to add that I do tip well enough- usually round up from whatever 20% is- but I just wish servers/bartenders/etc were paid more so we didn't have to.
If bartenders and servers were paid a livable wage, food and beverage prices would skyrocket. I mean, is a 5-10 dollar tip for you really break the bank?
I just don't understand the tipping hate. I was in the restaurant business for almost 15 years, so maybe that's why I tip everyone.
I would have no problem paying more for my food because the servers were getting paid a livable wage. I tip, I would just prefer that the money came from their employers rather than relying on customers to tip responsibly.
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