So my MIL likened the fact that she can't see us at her beck and call to being like a custody battle. Alrighty then...
This came up because she's pissed we won't drive 2+ hours to meet her half way for her to give DS his birthday gifts (as we legit have plans the next two weekends) when she was just here 3 weeks ago!!
Why can't she just mail them...?
She sounds a little batty.
She could mail them, or do what most people do and have them shipped here to begin with...
I have no idea on the batty front. I mean, we're talking about the woman who calls my husband sobbing every time we miss a holiday with her, whether or not we saw them previously to celebrate said holiday and the woman who thinks I'm a bitch because I wouldn't let her tell me that H's aunt and uncle were coming to visit DS when he was less than 2 weeks old and I wasn't up for visitors. I mean, she was pissed we kicked her out after 2.5 hours when she visited after we got home from the hospital... despite the fact that she stayed for about 8 hours both days I was in the hospital to visit...
She's a real special one.. she's not going to be too happy when she realizes we're not having any visitors this time around at the hospital or for 2 weeks once we're home (I had the baby blues really bad with J and am prepping to have them again this time around)
She's a real special one.. she's not going to be too happy when she realizes we're not having any visitors this time around at the hospital or for 2 weeks once we're home (I had the baby blues really bad with J and am prepping to have them again this time around)
That's completely fair. I think you shouldn't even tell her when he is born. I told my mom I wasn't even going to tell MH when I'm in labor lol.
She's a real special one.. she's not going to be too happy when she realizes we're not having any visitors this time around at the hospital or for 2 weeks once we're home (I had the baby blues really bad with J and am prepping to have them again this time around)
I fully intend to have a 72 hour buffer when we get home from the hospital this time. Last time my IL's came over the day after we got back and H ended up having to run to his office "really quickly" and was gone 3 hours. I played hostess three days after my emergency c-section. My H is lucky he lived to see another day after that shit show. I screamed and cried and yelled and locked myself in our room for like an hour when he got home.
We lived an hour from both sets of parents then. Now we live 10 minutes from my IL's and literally across the street from my parents, so enforcing this might be much more difficult.
Post by onesweetworld on Jan 8, 2017 21:41:16 GMT -5
Maybe I'm an odd duck but I actually want my mom there with me as much as possible. She is way more helpful than MH. When I had my appendix out, she slept in the chair next to me and we spent all day watching movies together. She made sure I had everything I needed and my meds.
I can't imagine not having that and having to take care of a newborn.
I'm not telling my mom when I am in labor, no regrets. I'll probably text her about it like the week after the baby is born, if I feel up to it once we get more settled.
I often wish I had that supportive, sane mother that so many people have, but I do have a really good MIL, so I'll count my blessings.
Post by silvermelody on Jan 8, 2017 22:04:27 GMT -5
I'm with onesweetworld. I'm thrilled my parents are coming right away, mostly because they are great with DS and we'll need the help. Also because she will cook and grocery shop and do actual helpful things instead of expecting us to host.
With DS they came out when he was 5'weeks old and we really could have used them in the first two weeks. But I was in denial pre-baby
Post by silvermelody on Jan 8, 2017 22:05:47 GMT -5
I ordered Chinese for dinner because DH is working. It'll probably be terrible for my blood sugar but I don't care. Nothing else sounded good and I'm hella pregnant
I ordered Chinese for dinner because DH is working. It'll probably be terrible for my blood sugar but I don't care. Nothing else sounded good and I'm hella pregnant
Which means you get a pass! I love Chinese food. It made me so sick for years (allergic to MSG) I'm happy that Chinese food in my new city does not make me sick
My mom is planning to come stay for at least a week when baby is here. She will be a big help. However, I haven't broken it yet to my family H and I won't have any out-of-town visitors for the first week. We want time to figure things out on our own and get into our own routine.
I ordered Chinese for dinner because DH is working. It'll probably be terrible for my blood sugar but I don't care. Nothing else sounded good and I'm hella pregnant
Which means you get a pass! I love Chinese food. It made me so sick for years (allergic to MSG) I'm happy that Chinese food in my new city does not make me sick
I haven't had Chinese or Thai for... twelve weeks? Since end of October. I discovered that they hide a lot of sugar in the sauces, plus I can't stop eating fried rice. So it's bad news for GD.
Hot & sour soup, Mongolian beef, fried rice. It was so good.
Sugar was 161 (should be under 130) so not great but a one off won't hurt too much. I had too much rice. I'll have to give the rice leftovers to DH. I have enough of everything for lunch tomorrow.
Maybe I'm an odd duck but I actually want my mom there with me as much as possible. She is way more helpful than MH. When I had my appendix out, she slept in the chair next to me and we spent all day watching movies together. She made sure I had everything I needed and my meds.
I can't imagine not having that and having to take care of a newborn.
I should clarify- My grandmother is coming to help, but she legit helps out and will even take the baby a night or two so we can sleep. She's the only one being told about labor because she's coming to watch DS1. There's no other visitors but her for 2 weeks, not even my grandfather. When I was in the hospital with DS1, she scrubbed our apartment from top to bottom and even steam cleaned our carpets before we came home and had food waiting when we got home.
She was also in the room when DS1 was born, something my MIL still holds a grudge about
Post by sleepymonkey on Jan 9, 2017 10:46:36 GMT -5
hpnegirl, my MIL came to "help" when MH went back to work a week and a half after DD was born. I was recovering from my C-section, still in a lot of pain, and suffering from major baby blues. MIL sat and played Sudoku the whole week and went to watch TV in the guest bedroom at 8pm every night. She wouldn't even drive me to my post-birth ob appt when I wasn't supposed to be driving yet. So yeah, that's not happening again and I told MH that. If someone is legitimately helpful, I am 100% for it. If not, too bad, they can come visit when I'm up for entertaining.
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