Post by dancerspose on Feb 6, 2017 10:58:54 GMT -5
notagoddess the nursing tanks I ordered from h&m came in and I really like them. I definitely recommend them. Post partum I'm like a 40G and the large fit me. You can get two packs for $25-30.
Happy early birthday oldbaylover1024 !! I am also doing the least. The motto of February for me is basically just #doingtheleast
Thanks! And I was venting to my parents about how uncomfortable I am and just that I'm ready for this baby to be out of me. My mom was so sweet and understanding. My dad said, "Well, he'll come when he's ready."
I literally answered with, "Says the MAN with a PENIS who never had to carry a living, moving BOWLING BALL!"
He laughed. I internally screamed.
Men sometimes... Just shut up and hand me chocolate and a tissue. Geez...
PAL May '17 Siggy Challenge: Picnics - Feminist Picnic
Two MM/C 1/09/12 & MM/C 4/26/12 BFP#3 - Rainbow #1 born 5/11/13 via unplanned C-section Two CP 11/23/15 & 5/13/16 BFP#6 - Rainbow #2 born 2/10/17 via planned C-section
shawnabm1320, if you're super sensitive, you can get pads from Lola. They're 100% organic cotton.
Evelyn3, ugh. Sorry about the irregular contractions. I know how annoying that is.
pivot, I've been losing my mucus plug for a few weeks now. Sometimes it's very blobby and unmistakeable. Other times it's like extreme, stringy EWCM.
AFM, had a great night with my ILs watching the Super Bowl. Hit 40 weeks today... omg. My mom randomly texted me today to wish me a good labor. Uh... thanks?
And I've been working from the nursery glider today with a companion.
I've also been having some irregular contractions today and diarrhea. We'll see if anything comes of it or if this is the baby's way of playing pranks on me until Friday. I'd love to avoid an induction.
Post by crazycatlady6 on Feb 6, 2017 11:05:31 GMT -5
Morning everyone.
Add me to the irregular contraction club. I'm tired and pissy as well so that doesn't help matters.
The pissyness comes from my family members who can't respect my wishes when it comes to the labor, delivery, etc. I have made it very clear that only DH will be with me during labor and family members are freaking out because they want to be in the room as well and what if they don't make it in time (it's an 8 hour trip). My immediate family's first response is to overreact and create a fuss and they will not be the calming support I will need as the thought of giving birth is freaking me out. I explained that I will call them when I know I am in labor so they can start the drive then chill at my house until we are ready for visitors. Nope, not good enough. I don't want to be pressured to give birth, do skin to skin, and breastfeed because there are people in the waiting room waiting to see him.
I then got a FB message last night from my mom saying that she doesn't want me to contact anyone about the birth until she sees him (including DH's family that lives 90 minutes away). She will be staying with me for 2 weeks after we get home to help out. I think that is incredibly selfish for her to ask that and not fair to my in-laws.
Sorry for the rant, I don't know if it's me being extra hormonal this morning or just letting everything get to me all of a sudden. Aren't hormones fun?
Add me to the irregular contraction club. I'm tired and pissy as well so that doesn't help matters.
The pissyness comes from my family members who can't respect my wishes when it comes to the labor, delivery, etc. I have made it very clear that only DH will be with me during labor and family members are freaking out because they want to be in the room as well and what if they don't make it in time (it's an 8 hour trip). My immediate family's first response is to overreact and create a fuss and they will not be the calming support I will need as the thought of giving birth is freaking me out. I explained that I will call them when I know I am in labor so they can start the drive then chill at my house until we are ready for visitors. Nope, not good enough. I don't want to be pressured to give birth, do skin to skin, and breastfeed because there are people in the waiting room waiting to see him.
I then got a FB message last night from my mom saying that she doesn't want me to contact anyone about the birth until she sees him (including DH's family that lives 90 minutes away). She will be staying with me for 2 weeks after we get home to help out. I think that is incredibly selfish for her to ask that and not fair to my in-laws.
Sorry for the rant, I don't know if it's me being extra hormonal this morning or just letting everything get to me all of a sudden. Aren't hormones fun?
I'll be honest, and it could just be because I have such a bad relationship with my maternal side that I'm estranged from them all, but your family sounds extremely selfish.
Guess what? It's YOUR baby and YOUR delivery. Yours. Not your mom's, MIL's, next door neighbor's. Yours. You tell whomever you want. Whenever you want. However you want. You don't need anyone's permission or blessing, though you should be on the same page with your H. And if they get pissy, they don't need to be around.
It's ok to have the major milestones in your life be about you instead of everyone else. You don't need to deal with their tantrums. And honestly, I'd say that. "This is a momentous, life changing event for me. And I'm so glad that you're so excited. But please do not think that your excitement entitles you to dictate how this will go. I will handle this in a way that is comfortable and appropriate for H and I. And if that's not acceptable for you, it's an invitation to meet your family member, not a jury summons. Don't feel like you have to be there."
(Admittedly this is VERY direct, but I've had to draw very strict boundaries with my own family and this is the only thing that works. Sorry if I'm projecting.)
crazycatlady6 Sorry your family is being that way. Hopefully they settle down and give you space. If not, you might have to be firm with them.
I forgot to bitch about the fact that DH left to go out of town this morning at 4 AM. He comes back tomorrow night but still. What if something happens tonight? He's only 3 hours away but dammit if I'm not resentful about it.
notagoddess the nursing tanks I ordered from h&m came in and I really like them. I definitely recommend them. Post partum I'm like a 40G and the large fit me. You can get two packs for $25-30.
Omg I keep forgetting about h&m for baby and nursing stuff, thanks for the reminder 😊
Post by oldbaylover1024 on Feb 6, 2017 11:23:23 GMT -5
crazycatlady6 - I'm on your team - you and YH should do what you want. Do not let family members or friends pressure you into situations you aren't comfortable with. You and YH have been through a lot to get here, and you deserve all the consideration in the world. We released some of our wishes for privacy when J was born and it was a huge mistake. I can tell you that this time around I had no problem putting my foot down. Do not be me - listen to your gut, follow through with what you want, and be firm. They'll get over it. In the end, this is 100% about you, YH, and your baby. No one else.
PAL May '17 Siggy Challenge: Picnics - Feminist Picnic
Two MM/C 1/09/12 & MM/C 4/26/12 BFP#3 - Rainbow #1 born 5/11/13 via unplanned C-section Two CP 11/23/15 & 5/13/16 BFP#6 - Rainbow #2 born 2/10/17 via planned C-section
crazycatlady6 not hormonal at all, this is about you, your H and the baby. Stand your ground and do not feel pressured into anything. They have all his life to meet him and spend time with him. The moment he's born doesn't need to be a mad dash for them all to see him. You can completely keep that as time for you and your H to bond and get to know the little guy and just recoup from the whole birthing experience. Don't feel bad at all, and if they can't respect what you want I just wouldn't phone them until after he was born. But that's just me.
mine wasn't all at once at first. It was just some pieces, quite small, didn't look like regular discharge though. I would say you would know the difference, but I only knew for sure after a bigger piece came out.
Post by flyinghorses6 on Feb 6, 2017 11:51:38 GMT -5
cosmicav I would be annoyed too. I probably would say something nasty back. I have asked repeat offenders to please keep the commentary on my physical appearance to themselves. That went over well.
Oh Evelyn3 I feel your pain and I'm due tomorrow. It stinks in the final days!! Keeping busy is definitely a good idea.
pivot mine had been coming out in pieces until I got my membranes stripped. It was boogery, sometimes thicker than EWCM, sometimes just like it but in a small glob. Gross?!! Yup. After she stripped me it was 3-4 days of red mucous. Now it's nothing.
nomnom how the heck are these acrobats doing that?!! I'm in shock they can move that much!
crazycatlady6 stand firm on what you want. Labor and delivery isn't a spectator sport!!!! And it's actually pretty rude for anyone to expect they can just do what they want. And I would say your mothers request is definitely selfish. I literally haven't heard from any extended family about them visiting us, so I hope they don't just assume they are welcome to the hospital or my home in the first weeks. Just my parents, sisters, and DHs dad, dads gf, and sister are my expected people over the first few days. And I hope it stays that way.
AFM I have been trying to all to get labor started and I'm finally throwing in the towel. I pumped twice at work last night and caused some contractions that went away after about an hour and half. And only saw tiny little bits of colostrum...so great on both ends. I walked and walked and walked. I did acupressure with one of the nurses.
I just want her here so badly. I am due tomorrow and I just would have loved to not go past my damn due date!
Other than that- I have tonight off, and cannot wait to crawl back into my bed.
Post by littleredfish on Feb 6, 2017 11:55:35 GMT -5
pivotstaz for your TMI question, mine has been coming in pieces and it's noticeably different. I'm also having extra discharge so I can compared to the MP. My MP pieces have more structure to them if that makes sense. I've been losing and regenerating it for like a month with random days of bloody show with no progress.
crazycatlady6 for our first 2 we didn't even tell people we were going to the hospital. Luckily for DD2 we were just in time to be able to drop DD1 off at daycare so we could tell people after. This time the ILs are taking care of the girls so we'll have to call them, but they will be occupied with the kids but it's the getting home and getting them to leave once we get home that I'm worried about. We did 3 days no visitors last 2 times and I liked that. So I'd like to get home, have them see baby quickly and leave. I'm making DH promise me he will put his foot down and they will respect it and come back to visit in a few days. I'm hoping they will just get over it eventually and if not, oh well. It's our family.
Tonight we have a Kindergarten Montessori meeting for DD1. Any mom's here with experience, good or bad? It was privatized where we lived before so I don't know anybody who has had their kids in the program.
Post by billybumbler on Feb 6, 2017 12:11:29 GMT -5
Well the good news is I had an ultrasound yesterday and fluid is back to normal. So I can do "moderate" activity according to my doctor.
Good thing too because I need to hit the grocery store and I'm definitely getting my manicure today.
cosmicav I'm so glad I'm on ML starting today so I don't have to hear the comments anymore. Yesterday I went to my sister's and my parents and some family friends were there and it's oh look at your belly you're huge blah blah blah can we talk about something else PLEASE? Jeez
crazycatlady6 this time around we're not telling anybody that I'm in labor. They will get a phone call and picture when the baby is born.
This is what we're doing. I love my family, but they have boundary issues and quite frankly, I don't give a damn about anyone's "hurt feelings" if I don't call them while I'm in labor. As far as I'm concerned, this is about me, H, and our baby. Everyone else will be enlightened as to her presence once we're ready.
We're letting my dad, sister, and ILs visit in the hospital. But other than that, we're not letting anyone come into the hospital so that we can have time as a family to bond. We're using "It's flu season" as an excuse, and asking people to respect our wishes. We've also told everyone that security is really tight on our maternity floor so they won't be allowed up and I will tell the nurses not to let them in. Harsh? Maybe. Don't care. I'm so tired of everyone making my pregnancy about them. Side note: My aunt and cousin are both nurses at the hospital. They will get to see her if they want but they aren't from the trouble side of the family so I'm allowing it.
Post by billybumbler on Feb 6, 2017 12:12:50 GMT -5
crazycatlady6 I don't know why it's so hard for some family members to get that this is not their moment. I recommend you don't even tell anyone until baby is already here. You will not regret it.
I've gotten a few comments too cosmicav and I'm so over it. I'm due at the end of the month like you and I'm just so tired of hearing "Oh you're still here?" Yes dumbass! I'm here until I'm not! How hard is that to understand?
cosmicav , I'm so sorry you're getting hit with all that nonsense. I think there needs to be a maternity t-shirt that says:
1) yes, I'm still here 2) yes, I'm still pregnant 3) no, there's only one (or 3) yes, it's twins) 4) yes, I know I'm huge
Now, please, SHUT UP!!
Then we could wear it and hopefully have no one bother us. It's probably wishful thinking, though. People are stupid.
crazycatlady6, I would be tempted to tell them all to F off, or just casually forget to tell anyone anything because it all "happened so fast" and there just wasn't time to inform people. I get so pissed when people make assumptions or insinuate themselves into my life and plans. Your baby, your rules is absolutely right.
I feel like this week is too damned busy for me to have a baby, and I'm feeling stupidly conflicted and pulled in all the directions about it. Between orthodontic appts, therapy appts, OB appts, an intro to high school meeting for 8th grader parents, and H having to drive A to her dad's this weekend (3hrs round trip, 2x), there's just no time! I know that technically, I can delegate some of this to my mom and dad, or mil, but I hate the thought. I know I need to get over it, but I don't know how. So, I'm sitting here hoping that I go past my due date so I don't have to worry about all of that and damned-near crying because I really don't want to be pregnant anymore.
flyinghorses6 I was so hoping you had gone into labor! FX it's soon for you too! I have a feeling a bunch of us are going to end up going on the same day
littleredfish, my sister teaches at a Montessori, ages 5-7 (k-2). When I was looking into a Montessori for A, she cautioned me that not all Montessori's are actually using Montessori methods. Visit the classroom, take a look at the seating arrangement and how their days are "structured". Basically, read up on the method and ideology, check out the school, and if it doesn't feel like what you've researched then it's probably only Montessori in name. She didn't elaborate, but she seemed firmly of the opinion that public Montessori's are more likely to be better than private ones because they aren't held to the same standards.
Good luck with your meeting! I hope it's what you're looking for- school hunting is a beast.
Post by oldbaylover1024 on Feb 6, 2017 12:43:54 GMT -5
Sorry, flyinghorses6 . Take comfort knowing that tomorrow is an amazing day to be born! I would know FX you don't go past your EDD.
Sorry to the folks going through family issues. I have the guilts about visitors at the hospital. We put our foot down that we only wanted parents to visit. This was essential for MH's family since there are a TON of them and they ALL wanted to come (MH is one of 7 kids and they all have spouses and kids of their own). The confession? We're letting my sister come visit since she's my only sibling and it'd start WWIII with my parents if I didn't let her visit. Ugh... sometimes I hate myself. If we weren't having a scheduled C-section, I wouldn't tell anyone until after he was born. FX our parents hold off on visiting until Friday afternoon-ish. I really want to tell my sister to not visit until we come home, but I don't think that'll go over well... We'll see. I'm already dreading the visitors issue.
And godparents, the baptism, and timing with Easter are all coming to a head, too. LOUD NOISES!
PAL May '17 Siggy Challenge: Picnics - Feminist Picnic
Two MM/C 1/09/12 & MM/C 4/26/12 BFP#3 - Rainbow #1 born 5/11/13 via unplanned C-section Two CP 11/23/15 & 5/13/16 BFP#6 - Rainbow #2 born 2/10/17 via planned C-section
And godparents, the baptism, and timing with Easter are all coming to a head, too. LOUD NOISES!
Oh don't even get me started!
Apparently we caused WWIII by choosing my BIL and FSIL as godparents for our child. I talked to my sister about it and she understands that our plans are to have Baby #2 in a few years if it all works out, and she'll be the godmother for that kid. If Baby #2 doesn't work out, we named her guardian in our will (something that to me the Type A planner was WAY more important). Never mind that my sister is a self-proclaimed atheist (which really she isn't but she's "mad at God right now" so she says she's an atheist - um not the same thing). So my mom's family is being bitchy about the whole thing.
So we decided we're not inviting extended family to the baptism. We'll have a small baptism with about 12 people (between our parents, siblings, and grandparents). Normally my family functions have about 60-70 people. Don't care!
Not only do we have Easter to contend with, but we also have a bridal shower for my FSIL, and then wedding stuff. May has Mother's Day, my FIL's birthday, and a few other family events. So it's going to be tough to find a time that works. I'll probably just pick a day and tell people if they want to come, that's when we're doing it. But I'm not coordinating 12 people's schedules.
oldbaylover1024 my sister's MIL was bitching about our baptism date. Someone I'm not related to. Someone I have met twice in my life. (It's almost like her MIL is jealous that my sister and BIL will be visiting for the baptism but dude...). And then her mil tried to schedule a visit to them when she *knew* it was the likely date for the baptism.
Post by shawnabm1320 on Feb 6, 2017 13:00:07 GMT -5
pivot, I feel your pain on the traveling husband bit. MH is going out of town (only 2 hours, but still) from Wednesday to Friday. When he told me I just stared at him in shock for about 30 seconds. "Your coworkers do know that I'm like 9 months pregnant, right? Is this important?" "Well, I guess it was just a good time to get everyone in the office for some face time." In other words, no. It wasn't important.
I told him I'm calling him the moment I even have 2 contractions in a row, even realizing that they could stop and turn into nothing. I'm seriously annoyed by it, even though I fully expect to get to my due date. Babies do not come on a schedule!!
And godparents, the baptism, and timing with Easter are all coming to a head, too. LOUD NOISES!
Oh don't even get me started!
Apparently we caused WWIII by choosing my BIL and FSIL as godparents for our child. I talked to my sister about it and she understands that our plans are to have Baby #2 in a few years if it all works out, and she'll be the godmother for that kid. If Baby #2 doesn't work out, we named her guardian in our will (something that to me the Type A planner was WAY more important). Never mind that my sister is a self-proclaimed atheist (which really she isn't but she's "mad at God right now" so she says she's an atheist - um not the same thing). So my mom's family is being bitchy about the whole thing.
So we decided we're not inviting extended family to the baptism. We'll have a small baptism with about 12 people (between our parents, siblings, and grandparents). Normally my family functions have about 60-70 people. Don't care!
Not only do we have Easter to contend with, but we also have a bridal shower for my FSIL, and then wedding stuff. May has Mother's Day, my FIL's birthday, and a few other family events. So it's going to be tough to find a time that works. I'll probably just pick a day and tell people if they want to come, that's when we're doing it. But I'm not coordinating 12 people's schedules.
So basically, you aren't alone.
Ugh, that's rough. It's amazing what folks get worked up about. It's like they set themselves up with certain expectations and, when that isn't the plan, they blame you for their disappointment. FWIW J's godparents and this baby's godparents will not be their guardians in our will. So yeah... I get it.
This wasn't as hard with J because she was baptized in June - no holidays, and we picked my only sister and MH's only brother as godparents - easy! This time we picked two of MH's cousins. The godfather cousin is very close to MH (more like a brother than a cousin), and the godmother sister (who is not Godfather's wife) just happens to be one of my BFFs from college and MH's cousin! I'm happy with our choice but...
The baptism is contending with Easter and scheduling. We're hoping to have the baptism mid-to-end of March (before Easter) during Sunday service, then brunch afterwards at the church. That's what we did with J and it worked well. But Godmother lives about 4 hours from the church, and I haven't even talked to the pastor about the timing.
And of course we have some family members who are hurt about not being picked for godparents, mainly a cousin of mine. Whatever, man... I just can't get into that right now.
PAL May '17 Siggy Challenge: Picnics - Feminist Picnic
Two MM/C 1/09/12 & MM/C 4/26/12 BFP#3 - Rainbow #1 born 5/11/13 via unplanned C-section Two CP 11/23/15 & 5/13/16 BFP#6 - Rainbow #2 born 2/10/17 via planned C-section
Post by shawnabm1320 on Feb 6, 2017 13:04:57 GMT -5
The only people who will know we're going to the hospital are my IL's (who will be watching DS), my dad (because he won't intrude), and probably my grandma and my best friend (because they won't come either). I can't tell my mom's side of the family, because I'm pretty sure they'd show up in the waiting room. That would tick me off. Basically, my mom and her whole side are boundary pushers. My dads side is like "just tell us what you'd prefer, and we'll do what you want." The best kind of people
Confession: my grandma on my mom's side has the flu right now, and not that I wish the flu on her, but I almost hope she's not completely better by the time the baby comes. I don't want her in my hospital room, and her being sick would let me get away with not putting my foot down. She would never come if she was sick!
Post by musicallyinclined on Feb 6, 2017 13:05:28 GMT -5
I am going to have to go back and catch up on all these family shenanigans. Also a big ole WTF to people who comment on pregnant bodies or other people's bodies in general, it's never ending.
Took both boys to the pedi this morning. DS1 isn't sick and apparently has figured out how to fake it! DS2 is above birth weight!!! And his jaundice doesn't need to be rechecked. Hallelujah, it's a miracle. DS1 is at MDO and it is so peaceful and quiet in the house.
Post by monicageller on Feb 6, 2017 13:06:03 GMT -5
Sorry to everyone whose family is giving them a hard time. I seem to be in the minority here, because I feel like "the more the merrier!" Only DH is in the room for pushing, but during labor and after I'm Happy to have everyone there. And when we get home- definitely yes! I'm so happy for the help. Especially now that we have DS who will need entertained, etc. That being said, I'm lucky that my mom and MIL are both fab, and will be cooking, cleaning, helping in anyway they can. They aren't just there to see baby and give me more work to do.
Everything looked great this morning at the hospital. Even BP was down, but they are certain it's because I was on bedrest all weekend. So now I'm officially on maternity leave and on "couch potato rest" until baby comes. I will continue to be monitored about twice a week until something changes and they induce or 39 weeks is the longest they'll let me go considering the high BP readings I was having last week. Early maternity leave would be a lot more exciting if I could do more.
I spoke to HR and got good news about how this will all work with my short term disability. My STD starts now and runs through 6 weeks after I have baby and then I start using my sick/vacation time. So basically, I still get as much time off after baby as I planned without "losing" anything. 😀
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