Did you "sleep train"?

[wildflower810]

Feb 12, 2017 18:28:12 GMT -5 spicysalmonroll said:

Well you guys are pretty persuasive! I tend to take my sister's advice just because she's a great mom but I may have to branch out on this one so we can start getting some damn sleep.

So any help.... I currently nurse to sleep and place in crib. I know all the "rules" say to put them in the crib awake. So what am I supposed to do when he always falls asleep nursing? How do I wake him.. just to put him in the crib with hopes of him falling asleep? That seems counterintuitive.

I kept nursing to/before sleep until we weaned at 14 months, but we got to the point where I could gently put him down even if he was still awakeish. Like, we're done nursing, we're going in the crib, fully asleep or not. Sometimes he'd wake and fuss, but other times he'd pass out. The times he would be awake, then finish falling asleep in his crib became more and more regular until it was normal. When we weaned, I snuggled/rocked, then put him down and crossed everything on my way out of the room. He fell right asleep.

[wildflower810]

Oh, but I was for sure militant about bedtime and nap times and routine, and still am. Even at almost 27 months, sleep begets sleep and he naps better when he sleeps more at night and vise versa. There were nights when we would be in the middle of dinner, I'd look at the clock and go "four hours since he woke up, bedtime!" and off to bed we'd go right then.

I also put DS1 down for naps in his bed from infancy. No napping the swing RnP, etc. He learned to sleep in his sleeping place. I often wanted to snuggle him for naps at 2 pm... but reminded myself that I didn't want to be having to snuggle him for sleep at 2 am. 

Basically I put routine and structure in place, but never let him CIO.

[Deleted]

I used the Ferber method with both kids. Life changing and they're both boss sleepers.

[gratefulandthankful]

1. No

2. Outcome: Ds solidly slept through the night without any waking up around 15 months.

[pobre]

Ferber was 3 nights for us. He slept and has slept for 10+ hours every night since, unless he was sick.

I'm also a hard ass about sleep. No getting out of bed before 6, ever.

[pobre]

Feb 12, 2017 19:03:22 GMT -5 @sterling said:

Feb 12, 2017 18:48:13 GMT -5 pobre said:

I would blow Ferber if he was in front of me.

Worth it.

Signed,
Have slept 8 hours a night for 4 years.

[sarahandeddie]

I did not sleep train with either of my kids. Both were exclusively breastfed and both wanted to nurse a lot at night. I coslept with both of them because it was much easier to give them a boob when they were right next to me. Both sttn around 15m but I did get longer stretches of sleep as they got older. Once they were fully weaned they slept just fine. They are now 6 and 4 and are great sleepers. My oldest only wakes at night if there is a loud storm and my youngest sleeps through everything.

For my kids. I felt like they sttn when they were ready developmentally. I have read the breast fed babies do need to eat at night and that's why they wake more frequently.

Good luck either way you go.

[cosmicav]

We did the Ferber method too, but I know that doesn't work for everyone; we got lucky in that LO was calmed by us checking in and not agitated. It was a less than a week long process. FX that baby#2 is similar or easier to sleep train.

[flippinchica]

Feb 12, 2017 17:32:52 GMT -5 @imapenguin said:

We did sleep training at 7 months. Started with Ferber and moved on to weissbluth after a week or so. DD went from never sleeping more than 3 hours to sleeping 8-9 hours in less than 2 weeks. After about a month she was sleeping 12 hours more often than not and still does now (14 months later). Best thing I ever did.

Twins. We also started with Ferber and then switched to weissbluth at 7 months. He would wake up every time we put him down and I was loosing my shit.

[flippinchica]

Feb 12, 2017 18:15:28 GMT -5 lupineaura said:

Here to plug my favorite website ever: preciouslittlesleep.com

Yes to sleep training. You're trading 1-3 nights of crying for wonderful, blissful, healthy uninterrupted sleep. It's good for everyone, especially the baby.

+1 to this website. We moved nursing to the living room before bath then book then a song then into the crib. No nursing before midnight.

[Deleted]

I pink puffy heart sleep training, and am not ashamed to say I used CIO with both children around 5-6 months of age and have 2 excellent sleepers that will go to sleep with no ritual required.

For some people, letting them cry and going in for "checks" works, but for both my kids that only prolonged and worsened it so I let them cry without checks. It was faster that way.

[Deleted]

To clarify a bit further, I know my kids different cries and if they really need me or if they're sick, I'm there

[robotpcr]

We did CIO. It's amazing. Unless sick or out of her element because of something like traveling my kid sleeps sleeps 11-11.5 hours at night (or at least is quiet in her crib) and has since she was 6 months. I have learned I don't function well at all on broken sleep so it's in everyone's best interests.

[northernlghts]

Nope, never sleep trained. We never needed to. She didn't sleep through the night until 18 months but at that point she was walking up once a night for a bottle. Personally, I didn't think this was a problem because she would go down to sleep really easily and sleep long stretches at night and she was a breastfeed baby for a year. My pediatrician said take it away cold turkey and see what happened. It took two nights of just having to soothe her back to sleep and she's slept through the night ever since.

[spooko]

CIO, Oh YEAH!

[talon]

I didn't. DD was always a pretty good sleeper and started STTN on her own. At 2 1/2 she's starting to go through phases where she wakes up some. It tends to last for a week or 2 and then resolve on it's own. But as an infant she slept great unless she had an ear infection.

[pobre]

Feb 12, 2017 20:44:16 GMT -5 @scoutnumbers said:

So, on the one hand whatever works for you is entirely, 100% what you should do.

But I feel like "we never did and it was great and my kid didn't STTN until 18-24 mo" isn't like...the BEST endorsement of not sleep training.

Thank you.

My kid sttn from 6 months on. Another year, I would not have lasted.

[kcrkcs]

I don't know that we have ever been 100% successful with sleep training as L has never sttn. I (her ped.) also felt that she needed at least one feed a night because she was dropping her weight percentile for a bit. We also have had good success and then sick or teeth and back to lots of wake ups/bad sleep and have to start over. Sometimes I just "couldn't" listen to her cry when I got ready to train her again so we didn't. She is 1 now and I am exhausted. So I recently started again. It is so much easier this time. So far so good. She still doesn't go the whole night but I am spacing it feeds and she goes back down like a dream. Sttn is within reach I can taste it... or that could be the exhaustion talking.
I found Weisbluth very informative/supportive. Good luck with whatever you decide to do. I don't feel like there is one right path to sleep and you may have lots of hitches along the way, don't let them deter you.

[northernlghts]

@aditi exactly. We established a good bedtime routine early on. She never fought going to sleep and if she was hungry in the middle of the night I was going to feed her. I feed her and she went right back to sleep. But I don't judge those who do sleep train. Whatever works for your family.

[fancynewbeesly]

We didn't need to really in the beginning. Unless teething or sick, Reese slept through the night fairly often. And then when she got sick at 2.5 and was on monthly steroids that caused insomnia for a full on week EVERY single month. We couldn't in good conscious sleep train her. So we dealt. Now we lay the law down.

If there is a 5 on your clock, you can leave your room to go to the bathroom and then back to sleep. If there is a 6, you can get out of bed. When it says 6:30 you can come to us.

If she was a crap sleeper, I would definitely have not been opposed to sleep training as long as their is no medical reason for it. (them being a crap sleeper)

[pinkie]

DS1 - horrendous sleeper from day 1. He also started with reactive airway issues early so we were always afraid to let him cry much because it would turn into lots of coughing. We got in habit of rocking him to sleep, he couldn't fall asleep himself. We finally tried Ferber and it helped but then he would get sick and all would go back to hell. We were successful with full CIO with no checks at age 2 and he was good for a year, then went to hell again. It honestly took until we hired a sleep consultant a few months ago (he's almost 4) to get him sleeping well.

DS2 - we worked to establish good sleep habits early. He was falling asleep on his own and immediately in the crib. He took awhile to STTN but always got up just to eat and then right back to sleep. We never sleep trained because it wasn't needed. We do let him fuss and work things out.

I personally would try sleep train after 6 months if the baby was up lots of times each night. Our older son almost killed us with sleep deprivation and we let things get out of control. By the time we realized it we had a mess on our hands. I also think it's easier to do sleep training when they are younger. The older they are the tougher it gets. Again just my opinion.

[regal]

I partially night weaned my oldest at 9mo. Jus after a year both my boys were fully night weaned and at about 15mo they were in a floor bed. STTN just before two. They are both solid sleepers.

I think lifestyle has a lot to do with this. My guess is working moms are more likely to sleep train because schedules, aren't as flexible and sleep is critical to work success. When my oldest was waking every 45 minutes and I was working, we started the night weaning process. Within 2-3 days he started sleeping 3-4 hour stretches and that worked for me.

S2 and D naturally woke/wake in that pattern and it's been fine for us. If it stops working for us we'll change something.

[mrsgiantpenis]

We also didn't sleep train for a long time because of BMB and while I love them, I disagree with the main opinion on that. It was the best thing for us to do. My then 2 year old went from crap sleep where it took three hours to get her down and one of us had to sleep with her half the night, to sleeping 12 hours easy with a 15 minute bed time routine. Plan to sleep train #2 (5mo) after her next check up at the beginning of next month. I can't wait!

[librarychica]

We did not formally sleep train but we did work on sleep. Routines, gradually putting down awake blah blah etc. idk if that counts as sleep training or not. DD2 took a little more work and tears, DD1 took us figuring out that she had silent reflux. The both STTN by 9 months and are solid sleepers. We are a fortunate family of sleepers who like to sleep.

I have also seen sleep training work wonders. I would be looking to try something new if my 6mo was waking that frequently, personally.

[Ee]

We never did official sleep training, but if it was needed we would have. Sleep is important. Luckily though DD STTN starting around 9 months when she weaned herself. Still going strong now at 21 months with ~12 hrs a night.

[spicysalmonroll]

Thank you, I love all these opinions. I do work full time and I've been a complete zombie for 6 months now. I'm not at all expecting him to STTN right away, and I don't mind 2 feedings, but waking every hour is something I just can't deal with anymore. I put a brave face on this whole time because I kept telling myself he'll get better, it's just a growth spurt, he's just teething, it's just this or that and he'll get better. But he hasn't ever gotten better and I've only enabled him by running in at every peep. So it's really time I need to make a change.

It's funny how someone mentioned their old BMB making them feel so guilty. That's exactly why I prefaced it the way I did- because I'm part of a few groups that are so against any CIO and I figured I might encounter similar here. But I'm pleasantly surprised that's not the case. Even the people here who did not sleep train have been respectful enough to just say "whatever works for you" rather than "you're horrible don't do that".

[lizblue]

Sleep training made me like being a parent way more than before sleep training. Sign me up for a Ferber blowie.

[Deleted]

Feb 12, 2017 20:29:39 GMT -5 @hilarityensued said:

Before you sleep train, you need to make sure there are no ear infections or other sicknesses this might be causing them pain. I couldn't, in good conscience, let them CIO in they were in pain.

Also, you will have to revisit whenever they are sick or you travel and really disrupt the schedule. But it's usually one night. Then back to sleep utopia.

This fat ass baby is getting his top two teeth, that's the only thing stopping me. He's miserable.

Soon as they pop I'm bringing down the hammer

[flippinchica]

OP, read this 3 part series www.preciouslittlesleep.com/what-you-need-to-know-about-sleeping-through-the-night-part-i/ and this www.preciouslittlesleep.com/how-to-cry-it-out-bedtime-edition/
It basically hits all the high points of Ferber and weissbluth

[joy]

We have not needed to sleep train yet. She's five months and just dropped all her nighttime feedings of her own choice. She does wake up and cry at the end of some sleep cycles but she stops within a minute or two.

If we need to sleep train in the future due to regressions or something, then yup - we'll do it. She dropped from three wake ups a night to two around 8 weeks. I could handle two 85% of the time; I can handle one wake up 100% of the time. I need to pee a lot at night so I'm up anyway. Ha.

EDIT: If we do sleep train, then we're going to need a super, no cry solution.  We're in a row home so I worry about my neighbors. A lot.