Here to plug my favorite website ever: preciouslittlesleep.com
Yes to sleep training. You're trading 1-3 nights of crying for wonderful, blissful, healthy uninterrupted sleep. It's good for everyone, especially the baby.
Quoting to say a big yes to this website. It helps to read up in advance. And make sure you and your partner are both committed.
This fat ass baby is getting his top two teeth, that's the only thing stopping me. He's miserable.
Soon as they pop I'm bringing down the hammer
This was me waiting on the ear tube surgery. So basically from 6 months old to 8 months old, when we were in the hell of the longest ear infection on earth, I just held him while we slept and counted down the days until I could drop the hammer. Two days after the surgery it was on.
DS is getting tubes on Wednesday. I got a little verklempt when the nurse called on Friday but I'm looking forward to it being done.
Post by tincupchalice on Feb 12, 2017 22:37:30 GMT -5
I did some sleep training with both. Even with sleep training, DS1 didn't STTN until 15-18 months. The training was just enough to get him down to 2-4 wake ups a night before that. It sucked.
We just started with #2 who is almost 9 months. So far it's going better than with DS1, but not super awesome yet. My goal is him STTN around a year.
We have not needed to sleep train yet. She's five months and just dropped all her nighttime feedings of her own choice. She does wake up and cry at the end of some sleep cycles but she stops within a minute or two.
If we need to sleep train in the future due to regressions or something, then yup - we'll do it. She dropped from three wake ups a night to two around 8 weeks. I could handle two 85% of the time; I can handle one wake up 100% of the time. I need to pee a lot at night so I'm up anyway. Ha.
EDIT: If we do sleep train, then we're going to need a super, no cry solution. We're in a row home so I worry about my neighbors. A lot.
Sadly, there is no no-cry method of sleep training. It all involves crying and tears. If there was a real "no cry sleep solution" that worked, everyone would do that instead of CIO. Hopefully your kiddo won't need it I followed the precious little sleep website from day 1 with the twins and getting them to sleep was much easier/quieter than with DD1, who needed full on Weisbluth CIO.
My good little sleeper was also EFF. I have a frenemy who cosleeps with her two year old and he still wakes up at least every two hours. She thinks it's inhumane to do anything else and I think she's BSC.
Well, definitely some kids are more resistant to good sleep habits, and so some method must be used. Case in point? My SO's daughters were 4 years old and the littlest is 3 1/2 yrs (and still does not) before sleeping thru the night. The 3 1/2 year old still wakes once every night, twice a few times a week and occasionally more often. Even subtracting for separation anxiety and divorce- the oldest was 4 before she did (when both of her parents were together) You do not want to be these parents. Luckily my DS is a sound sleeper and doesn't seem to be affected by the night wanderers. To be completely honest its affected my relationship to them- my SO gets up with them and out of bed several times a night when were all home and then they are pretty grumpy in the morning.
ETA: yes I feel like a total jerk, but I sleep in the same bed at the same time with my SO 8 days a month. I really need sound sleep these nights as well as some adult time, which is of course, non existent when they're with us. This is something they are biologically prone to- their bio mom also doesn't require much sleep and a night owl. Even understanding all this, when we are awakened frequently, and then DS is up early... Its hard on all of us, and most of all..they are not getting enough sleep, which of course makes evenings that much more difficult in the witching hour when Little One is exhausted and cranked out.
We have not needed to sleep train yet. She's five months and just dropped all her nighttime feedings of her own choice. She does wake up and cry at the end of some sleep cycles but she stops within a minute or two.
If we need to sleep train in the future due to regressions or something, then yup - we'll do it. She dropped from three wake ups a night to two around 8 weeks. I could handle two 85% of the time; I can handle one wake up 100% of the time. I need to pee a lot at night so I'm up anyway. Ha.
EDIT: If we do sleep train, then we're going to need a super, no cry solution. We're in a row home so I worry about my neighbors. A lot.
We sleep trained while we lived in an apartment, so if it ever comes to that you're probably fine. Or maybe I should have worried about my neighbors, but I was too tired and they were too nice to say anything if it did bother them.
Neighbor to our left has already said that the baby woke her up one night. She was crying from getting her arm stuck in her sleep suit (ha) and we tried to fix it at 3am.
She travels a lot... I'll just coincide cry it out with a work trip for her ;-)
I did not sleep train. They were both terrible sleepers until 14 months, then they turned a corner and became awesome sleepers. They both sleep until about 7:30, usually.
I would actually die if I had a 3.5 year old that still didn't STTN. I got pissed last night because the baby cried for like 2 mins at 4:00 am.
This is what pushed us to hire a sleep consultant. I felt it was kinda crazy to pay someone to help us get our son to sleep but we could not take the nighttime crap any longer (he was 3.5 when we started it in November). Now I would say it was by far the best money we ever spent.
And fuck neighbors who give anyone a hard time about a crying baby. Sorry. That's life. Do they think shaming the parents will improve the situation?
No one shamed me - I asked if she could hear the baby that night and she said yes. I'm trying be considerate. Obviously not to the detriment of myself - my kid is a good sleeper. But if I can minimize the noise then I'm going to do it. ::shrug::
EDIT - this is strictly related to cry it out in the middle of the night.
And fuck neighbors who give anyone a hard time about a crying baby. Sorry. That's life. Do they think shaming the parents will improve the situation?
No one shamed me - I asked if she could hear the baby that night and she said yes. I'm trying be considerate. Obviously not to the detriment of myself - my kid is a good sleeper. But if I can minimize the noise then I'm going to do it. ::shrug::
EDIT - this is strictly related to cry it out in the middle of the night.
I don't even remember if I was responding to your post or someone else's. I think that's fabulous that you're trying to be considerate. It's just sometimes beyond the parents' ability to quiet a baby and I think we've had posters whose neighbors have been jerks about it.
My good little sleeper was also EFF. I have a frenemy who cosleeps with her two year old and he still wakes up at least every two hours. She thinks it's inhumane to do anything else and I think she's BSC.
Oh the arguments I've gotten into in the crunchy community. I'm definitely not crunchy, just a lil chewy.
"Cribs are a jail cell"
"They need mama snuggles"
"Can't leave my nursling"
But them the mommy martyr posts about how tired they are, and how they do so much. Blow me.
The last I saw her, my crunchy crazy friend's 2 year old was up like every 45 minutes.
She just recently liked an article about how when your kid won't put on shoes and get ready and leave the house for school you should sit with him and talk out his feelings or some shit so we are very different parents in many venues.
We did more of an "untraining" Stopped rocking and giving a bottle to sleep. IMO after research I realized babies are perfectly capable of falling asleep without help, but when they are used to going down with a bottle or boob and rocking they learn to expect that each time they need to fall asleep. I didn't realise this until I had already established all those habits with my son and it was harder to untrain him from needing my help. It eventually worked out for us but it took a while to get him to not need my help anymore. In my opinion the longer you wait the harder it will be. We switched him to a floor bed at around 1 year and it did wonders for us. If he wasn't ready to sleep yet he would crawl around the room, play around with books and then eventually he passed out, sometimes on the floor, and then I could transfer him to his bed once he was asleep. Then there was plenty of times he cried at the door for me but once he realised he would not be coming out to play he would fall asleep. Anyways, that's just my experience and I hope it may give you a different perspective. If not then that's completely okay! Do what works for you. It's sucks when they have a hard time sleeping so I hope all goes well for you and your babe!
Post by seamonster on Feb 13, 2017 13:59:35 GMT -5
DS was in our room until a few weeks before he turned 1, so we focused on good sleep hygiene and no cry methods until then. Once he was out of our room, we did one night of Ferber (that was hell) and then a combination of Ferber and no cry methods. I nursed to sleep for bedtime up until 22 months when he stopped really wanting to do so, but I did night wean months before that. DS also had reflux and several respiratory and ear infections, so he slept about half the first year with the head of his crib elevated.
When I say a combination of Ferber and no cry is that I would pick DS up to soothe him and would very slowly spread out the time I was gone.
For MOTN wakeups I'd pick up and soothe, and offer to nurse as a last resort. Waking up 5 to 9 times is excessive and you don't need to nurse all those times. Try just rocking back to sleep or doing a back rub before you nurse.
The last I saw her, my crunchy crazy friend's 2 year old was up like every 45 minutes.
She just recently liked an article about how when your kid won't put on shoes and get ready and leave the house for school you should sit with him and talk out his feelings or some shit so we are very different parents in many venues.
My good little sleeper was also EFF. I have a frenemy who cosleeps with her two year old and he still wakes up at least every two hours. She thinks it's inhumane to do anything else and I think she's BSC.
Oh the arguments I've gotten into in the crunchy community. I'm definitely not crunchy, just a lil chewy.
"Cribs are a jail cell"
"They need mama snuggles"
"Can't leave my nursling"
But them the mommy martyr posts about how tired they are, and how they do so much. Blow me.
I see we had the same FB friend. Mine would post pictures of herself playing with her 2yo at 3am, or baking pies with her 6mo wrapped on her chest at 4am. A few weeks ago, she posted an article basically comparing sleep training to domestic violence with a comment of "This is so sick" ::many sad face emojis::
Post by lucilleaustero on Feb 13, 2017 15:35:26 GMT -5
I did not sleep train for either of my kids.
My DD was up every 2 hours, like clockwork until she turned 6 months old and then a switch flipped and she started sleeping 13 hours a night, straight through.
My son was breastfed, so he was still waking up to feed. We bedshared until he was 11 months old and he woke up several times a night to breastfeed, mainly because he hated the bottle and drank very little while I was at work.
He started sleeping longer stretches when he started cow's milk. Even though he still breastfed when I was hme, he would actually drink the cow's milk from a sippy, so he was not needing to feed as much at night.
He started STTN at 15 months of age-ish. It was rough, but I do not have the stones for sleep training.
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