Your last sentence makes me very sad :/ Are you alright?
Me too @sangriapirate. Thank you for your concern, I am not injured.
Injuries/abuse are not always physical. Emotional and spiritual abuse can be just as devastating as well though it is not as recognized. I'm glad your getting therapy and I hope you take care of yourself. *hugs*
Thank you all so much. It really means a lot to me to able to share this with you without fear of being judged or reprimanded, which is undoubtedly what would happen with DH. He has the best intentions, but he doesn't express himself the right way, and it coms across as very hurtful and really impacts me mentally, not to mention our marriage and our child. This was not as big of a problem before DD was born, because now the brunt of our arguments are about me being a bad mom. Like I said, these are all issues that I bring up both in individual and couples therapy. I just know we HAVE to do it for our baby (and ourselves), and future kids.
FFFC: I have signed up for like 50 Coursera courses, but I have only ever finished 2 or 3. I see all these awesome topics and just sign up for all of them pre-emptively so they'll be in my archive if/when I have any spare time. There's a Greek and Roman Mythology one that's two years old, but I still hope to do it some day!
I do usually watch a few of the lectures, and I go back to the archived one every now and then. I wish I had more time to take them seriously! Some of the programming ones are just too intense. I hope they never start putting limits on the courses you can sign up for.
Thank you all so much. It really means a lot to me to able to share this with you without fear of being judged or reprimanded, which is undoubtedly what would happen with DH. He has the best intentions, but he doesn't express himself the right way, and it coms across as very hurtful and really impacts me mentally, not to mention our marriage and our child. This was not as big of a problem before DD was born, because now the brunt of our arguments are about me being a bad mom. Like I said, these are all issues that I bring up both in individual and couples therapy. I just know we HAVE to do it for our baby (and ourselves), and future kids.
I'm glad you are seeking counseling. That takes a lot of courage. Hugs to you.
FFFC: I just drove the 5 minutes home from work to poop. I told everyone I had a call I needed to take in private, but really I just have bathroom anxiety.
I poop at work way more often than I poop at home.
FFFC: I just drove the 5 minutes home from work to poop. I told everyone I had a call I needed to take in private, but really I just have bathroom anxiety.
I poop at work way more often than I poop at home.
Post by kawaiikitsune on Jan 30, 2015 11:33:57 GMT -5
SheilaTheTank -It really is. Target and our local comic book shop are to blame for me. I always say "No more, grown up shirts from now on." but I never follow through. I joke with MH that if Stacy London & Clinton Kelly (from What Not to Wear) could see my closet, they'd have an earful for me.
ohinvrtedworld - Ooof, that was painful to even read. I lost one of my favorite Batman shirts a couple years ago and had a small existential crisis.
pippacricket - It is amazing, I love Coursera so much! My alma mater was one of the founders so I've been on since it started - I think their format is great.
Ever since they came out, I always wish my dad was still alive because he would be in such heaven at the ability to take so many free courses on so many subjects, and in different languages.
But then I think, maybe it's like that in heaven, too, with all his old university friends!
FFFC: I just drove the 5 minutes home from work to poop. I told everyone I had a call I needed to take in private, but really I just have bathroom anxiety.
I poop at work way more often than I poop at home.
My other FFFC: my morning routine is down to such an exact science, just the smell of coffee makes me have to poop. When I worked at my last job, I pretty much always did that before even getting to my desk.
I convinced DH that we needed to be in a different house to have children (space, neighborhood, distance from family, etc).
He obliged, and we listed.
House is now under contract.
I regret everything and wish we were staying here, haha.
DH would probably kill me if I told him that after everything we've worked toward.
We sold our house last year because we wanted a 3 bedroom house so we could have more space for a kid. Well, that plan hasn't really worked out so well. I think we're both regretting the move a tiny bit. We miss our old location, but we were priced out of it for what we were looking for. We're just starting to feel more at home in our new place, but I don't think we'll ever like it as much.
Added: Sorry that was a really downer of a reply. I'm sure after a while you'll get used to your new place too.
Thank you all so much. It really means a lot to me to able to share this with you without fear of being judged or reprimanded, which is undoubtedly what would happen with DH. He has the best intentions, but he doesn't express himself the right way, and it coms across as very hurtful and really impacts me mentally, not to mention our marriage and our child. This was not as big of a problem before DD was born, because now the brunt of our arguments are about me being a bad mom. Like I said, these are all issues that I bring up both in individual and couples therapy. I just know we HAVE to do it for our baby (and ourselves), and future kids.
I don't want to be "that person" & I'm very sorry for the situation that you're in but...if having a child has caused a strain in your marriage to the point that you've sought out couples therapy, do you & your husband think TFAS is a good plan right now?
Number One: Born 06.16.2009 BFP: 01.17.2014 / MC 02.05.2014 BFP: 03.08.2014 / MMC: 05.07.2014 Dx: Partial Molar/GTD. Benched until 01.2015 Number Two: Born 07.22.2016
I convinced DH that we needed to be in a different house to have children (space, neighborhood, distance from family, etc).
He obliged, and we listed.
House is now under contract.
I regret everything and wish we were staying here, haha.
DH would probably kill me if I told him that after everything we've worked toward.
We sold our house last year because we wanted a 3 bedroom house so we could have more space for a kid. Well, that plan hasn't really worked out so well. I think we're both regretting the move a tiny bit. We miss our old location, but we were priced out of it for what we were looking for. We're just starting to feel more at home in our new place, but I don't think we'll ever like it as much.
Added: Sorry that was a really downer of a reply. I'm sure after a while you'll get used to your new place too.
Haha, no worries!
We found a house that we loved that had been reduced in price nearly $60k (!!!) since it was first listed. We were amazed it hadn't sold in the six months we had our house on the market (it's a very rural, out of the way place and they made some VERY bold kitchen choices that we love, but I truly think that's why it hadn't sold). I think this house had become somewhat of a fantasy for us, as we had only a few weeks left for our house listing, and had come to terms with the fact that it wasn't going to sell and we would be staying in it. Well, we got an offer that was only $700 lower than our asking price, so we accepted, and the sellers of the bold kitchen home accepted our offer, so now the reality is sinking in.
Hopefully you and I both can remind ourselves of the reasons we chose to move in the first place, and eventually settle in to a new 'home!'
Thank you all so much. It really means a lot to me to able to share this with you without fear of being judged or reprimanded, which is undoubtedly what would happen with DH. He has the best intentions, but he doesn't express himself the right way, and it coms across as very hurtful and really impacts me mentally, not to mention our marriage and our child. This was not as big of a problem before DD was born, because now the brunt of our arguments are about me being a bad mom. Like I said, these are all issues that I bring up both in individual and couples therapy. I just know we HAVE to do it for our baby (and ourselves), and future kids.
I don't want to be "that person" & I'm very sorry for the situation that you're in but...if having a child has caused a strain in your marriage to the point that you've sought out couples therapy, do you & your husband think TFAS is a good plan right now?
I was thinking this too. It may not be the right time to have a second child
Also, I have way more Disney/comic book themed shirts than a 27 year old should. #sorrynotsorry
That sounds a lot like mine and my husband's wardrobes, but throw in some gaming shirts as well as the comic/Disney items. There are so many places I could blame this on, but TeeFury and Ript Apparel are the main culprits.
Me: 30 DH: 29; Married: September, 2010 TTC #1: April 2013 Benched: May 2013 Cancer(DH) Off the Bench: September 2014 July 2015 ER low sperm count and motility(radiation side effect). FET September 1,2015. BFP 9/9/15.- 3 on the way.
Post by Belcher_Ears on Jan 30, 2015 12:00:07 GMT -5
FFFC: I am having my family over for the superbowl. One of the food items I am making is meatball subs. Normally I have to go buy beef instead of just using the venison that I have because my mother won't eat it. Everyone in my family will eat venison except my mother because she thinks it doesn't taste good (though I have no memory of her ever trying venison). And she has no problem telling you even without trying the food that it tastes bad. So this year, instead of buying beef I am using the damn venison. And if she asks, it's beef.
Post by samanthasays on Jan 30, 2015 12:02:40 GMT -5
I don't remember if I have already admitted this, but since I work from home I have peed and pooped while on conference calls. I obviously put my phone on mute, but it does feel a little wrong.
July 2013 started TTC 7/20/2014=BFP; CP confirmed 8/1/2014 Dec 2014: Diagnosis = Unexplained IF 12/24/2014 Medicated TI (clomid)=BFN 1/22/2015: IUI #1 cancelled due to cyst 02/17/2015: IUI #2 cancelled due to another cyst 3/31/2015: IUI with Femera, 1 good follie, great sperm count = CP, my December Rainbow became an Angel
Post by ttcminicofer on Jan 30, 2015 12:06:58 GMT -5
icequeen I literally cringed at the thought your husband is criticizing your body among other things. I'm so sorry. I'm so glad you guys are taking the steps and getting help together. No one should feel the way you do. Big hugs to you!
Also, I have way more Disney/comic book themed shirts than a 27 year old should. #sorrynotsorry
That sounds a lot like mine and my husband's wardrobes, but throw in some gaming shirts as well as the comic/Disney items. There are so many places I could blame this on, but TeeFury and Ript Apparel are the main culprits.
I have banned myself from looking at that site. It's just too dangerous.
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