Thank you for your encouragement, shellbell. I know that you're right about making an emotional decision for one feeding. That's why I've started pumping to build up a small supply for when I can't handle it.
Hugs. I just want to be a good mom.
Even if you never touched a pump or put your baby to breast again--you would still be a good mom. Like others said- be gentle with yourself. You are doing all you can and then some. And your baby LOVES you regardless! Hugs!!!
Post by shawnabm1320 on Feb 18, 2017 19:27:18 GMT -5
Absolutely nursing is not easy and does not come naturally. I was horrified at my bleeding nipples and nearly cried at every feeding until we got a nipple shield. I didn't want to stay on it (although it's totally fine, from what I understand), so I was googling videos of the "football hold" and laid back nursing and saw a lactation consultant twice. I definitely recommend a LC, because they should also be able to tell you if you're dealing with normal breastfeeding challenges, shallow latch, or a tongue tie/lip tie issue. And it's ok to decide it's all too much.
Your last few sentences are EXACTLY how I feel. It absolutely does not make you a shitty anything. Right now I don't feel like nursing will ever be a bonding experience for us. All I'm aiming for now is to be successful so we reach a convenient means to and end. I've been attached to the pump the past 3 weeks and it's no fun, but I've only had a few tolerable nursing experiences. The LC I've been working with has been amazing and makes me feel in no way a failure, but when I'm on my own at home we just never seem to get it right. It's so discouraging. My best advice for you is to find an LC you're comfortable with, and who is open minded enough to work with you to teach whatever end is best for you and baby (not someone who will make you feel badly if for some reason you can't successfully nurse).
All of this. Nursing for me has never been comfortable, easy, convienient or any of those glowing terms one might hear breastfeeding enthusiasts use. Pumping is notably easier on me, but even that is a struggle- although I'm making it harder on myself by holding out on buying a pumping bra.
Only you know when enough is enough. Personally, I'm approaching my threshold rapidly. Trying really hard to make peace with it.
Something' I was told while nursing with LO1 was to never quit on a bad day. Make sure you end on a good/positive one. Keeping this mindset helped me push thru more then one hard day.
All of this. Nursing for me has never been comfortable, easy, convienient or any of those glowing terms one might hear breastfeeding enthusiasts use. Pumping is notably easier on me, but even that is a struggle- although I'm making it harder on myself by holding out on buying a pumping bra.
Only you know when enough is enough. Personally, I'm approaching my threshold rapidly. Trying really hard to make peace with it.
Something' I was told while nursing with LO1 was to never quit on a bad day. Make sure you end on a good/positive one. Keeping this mindset helped me push thru more then one hard day.
To some extent, I agree. But if all you've had are bad days and it's just not getting better, it's okay to stop.
Post by musicallyinclined on Feb 18, 2017 20:26:54 GMT -5
Fed is best. Happy and healthy, emotionally, mentally, and physically is what's most important for everyone. I happen to enjoy nursing now, but goodness I hated it for the first month with DS1 but I was (and am) too stubborn to quit (maybe not the healthiest thing).
Big hugs to all the struggling nursing moms....I struggled so hard to make it work with my first but the pain and stress and the fact that LO was a preemie and didn't know wtf he was doing--plus the fact that I was barely even lactating just all combined into my going exclusively formula feeding. I felt a little guilty but it's silly because my kid THRIVED once he was getting satisfactorily fed. I mean he is so smart and sweet and loving now, and he is RARELY sick. what I am saying is that fed truly truly is best. Formula does not doom your child in any way.
I'm going to try nursing again this go around but I am trying to promise myself to not be upset if it doesn't work. There is so much pressure on new moms to do things a certain way. :/ it's not right.
The boys are going to some train thing, so the girls are going to Joann's to look at fabric. Hopefully we will meet for lunch at Red Robin which just happens to be in the same parking lot as HomeGoods.
Was the train thing at the fairgrounds? H was mentioning something about it because our son is obsessed with trains.
Post by dancerspose on Feb 18, 2017 21:12:55 GMT -5
loves2shop4shoes I'll also add in the 3 rules my LC shared during her class that were my mantra during our initial breastfeeding crisis a few days after we came home when we had to run out and buy formula.
1. Feed the baby 2. Protect the supply 3. Seek help
It sounds simple and common sense but it was so comforting to remember that. And her professional opinion was if you do the first two things when you do get help you can almost always start/go back to nursing successfully.
The boys are going to some train thing, so the girls are going to Joann's to look at fabric. Hopefully we will meet for lunch at Red Robin which just happens to be in the same parking lot as HomeGoods.
Was the train thing at the fairgrounds? H was mentioning something about it because our son is obsessed with trains.
Yes! They went in the fall and DS looooooved it. There are a lot of trains to look at and a big wooden railway play area. There are also lots of inexpensive cars, diggers, etc.
Post by dancerspose on Feb 18, 2017 21:32:40 GMT -5
@wineandcupcakes I'm so sorry. And I also had really shitty LCs at the hospital. They gave me the size small nipple shield, which caused the initial destruction of my one nipple that's actually s size large. And so many other problems.
That reminds me, crazycatlady6 I hope you have no problem breastfeeding if that's what you're choosing to do. But, if you do need help I put very little faith in the LCs at our hospital. I'll happily share the name and info of the person I've been working with if you need it.
Post by oldbaylover1024 on Feb 18, 2017 22:17:32 GMT -5
@wineandcupcakes - Huge {{hugs}}. It's incredibly frustrating when things don't work out the way we want or imagined. You're doing a great job taking care of your babies.
PAL May '17 Siggy Challenge: Picnics - Feminist Picnic
Two MM/C 1/09/12 & MM/C 4/26/12 BFP#3 - Rainbow #1 born 5/11/13 via unplanned C-section Two CP 11/23/15 & 5/13/16 BFP#6 - Rainbow #2 born 2/10/17 via planned C-section
Post by crazycatlady6 on Feb 18, 2017 22:45:56 GMT -5
dancerspose - I do plan on BF so that is disheartening to hear the LC's aren't that great at our hospital. I will keep your LC in mind if I have struggles with BF.
I will laugh my butt off if they give me a size small nipple shield.
@wineandcupcakes I'm so sorry. And I also had really shitty LCs at the hospital. They gave me the size small nipple shield, which caused the initial destruction of my one nipple that's actually s size large. And so many other problems.
That reminds me, crazycatlady6 I hope you have no problem breastfeeding if that's what you're choosing to do. But, if you do need help I put very little faith in the LCs at our hospital. I'll happily share the name and info of the person I've been working with if you need it.
The LCs I saw last time were suspicious that I needed a larger flange too. So painful when it's too small and nipples are already raw!
Post by notagoddess on Feb 18, 2017 23:45:13 GMT -5
Sarah Cecilia was born at 5:36pm today! She weighed in at 6 pounds 13 oz. Labor was long, exhausting and scary at times but I'm pretty proud of myself for getting through it and bringing this little girl into the world. I still can't believe we have our baby!
Post by coffeeonice on Feb 19, 2017 0:04:21 GMT -5
Being pregnant is starting to get really freaking annoying. If I get 50 more jabs to the cervix before bed I might just throw my phone. I mean I know I'm due tomorrow, but does that mean everything has to take a sharp turn towards misery to make it official?! Please, let the alternating groin and cervix pains continue for two more weeks until my induction ..I'd really love it.
Post by coffeeonice on Feb 19, 2017 0:05:53 GMT -5
Congrats notagoddess! At least the labor part is over and now you get to enjoy your little bundle!! Looking forward to hearing more details, way to go😄
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