I have neither at this time, but I guess I have a heavier topic
I have a close group of online friends from cloth diapers. Racism comes up a lot in the group and they've opened my eyes to how prevalent it still is.
Yesterday people were sharing various situations they've been in/ seen and I realized I've really never witnessed anything like that. For example, cashiers treating a white customer and a black customer totally differently, being followed in stores and different treatment at restaurants. BUT, I always see Cincinnati and Ohio considered very racist places so I figure I'm probably not paying attention.
So I guess my question is are you all noticing and have you ever intervened?
Post by mrscatfarmer13 on Apr 26, 2017 8:05:40 GMT -5
dogmama22 Sometimes I think it's hard for us (white women) to recognize more covert racism because it's unlikely that we've experienced it ourselves so we don't really know what to look for. KWIM? I can't recall a time that I've ever seen blatant racism happen in front of me. I frequently go to lunch with a WOC and we've never been treated different, but we've had conversations about whether or not that fact that I'm with her plays into how we're treated when we're out.
dogmama22 Sometimes I think it's hard for us (white women) to recognize more covert racism because it's unlikely that we've experienced ourselves so we don't really know what to look for. KWIM? I can't recall a time that I've ever seen blatant racism happen in front of me. I frequently go to lunch with a WOC and we've never been treated different, but we've had conversations about whether or not that fact that I'm with her plays into how we're treated when we're out.
Thanks for weighing in. That's basically what my other friends said and they mentioned that it's really part of the whole privilege thing.
dogmama22 Sometimes I think it's hard for us (white women) to recognize more covert racism because it's unlikely that we've experienced ourselves so we don't really know what to look for. KWIM? I can't recall a time that I've ever seen blatant racism happen in front of me. I frequently go to lunch with a WOC and we've never been treated different, but we've had conversations about whether or not that fact that I'm with her plays into how we're treated when we're out.
Thanks for weighing in. That's basically what my other friends said and they mentioned that it's really part of the whole privilege thing.
I agree it's certainly privilege at play. I considered adding something about that, but I figured the dots could be connected.
I have heard lots and lots of racist stuff come out of people's mouths. Not like straight up racist, but more white people that don't think about what they're saying before they speak it and realize it's not okay. I have heard it before like an example- blaming their race on the reason they committed a crime or got in a traffic accident, or seeing child abuse, etc... It's like if they would just stop and think - white people abuse/ cause wrecks/ shoot people. It's always people that are on the perimeter of my social life. Because I don't socialize with racist people. Basically racial profiling in comments people make. I typically call it out or just give them a straight bitch face. I was actually not surprised by trump and the racist crap- it's so ingrained in some people they don't even realize they're doing it because they're ignorant. I also talk a lot with the general public and spent an entire Obama term here and well- people are racist. Lots of people.
If I hear one more thing from coworkers or acquaintances about the damn border wall.... This morning I was making fun of it all- saying he should build the Brent Spence before a border wall if he's al "America first." Then this coworker said "well they'll just come over and tear down the bridge if you build it so you have to build the wall first." I said "what bridge have illegal immigrants knocked down in the past?" I mean this was my face 😖
If I hear one more thing from coworkers or acquaintances about the damn border wall.... This morning I was making fun of it all- saying he should build the Brent Spence before a border wall if he's al "America first." Then this coworker said "well they'll just come over and tear down the bridge if you build it so you have to build the wall first." I said "what bridge have illegal immigrants knocked down in the past?" I mean this was my face 😖
Omg. That sounds like something my in laws would say. So ignorant.
Post by sstwinklinglites on Apr 26, 2017 9:14:14 GMT -5
H in the past, when he was very against staying here, mentioned that people here were very racist. He didn't site a specific situation he's been in. But he doesn't look white like DS & I do either, so I can believe it. I can't say I've noticed anything myself, against him, or anyone else. I don't know if me hanging out with a POC plays into them being treated differently, or if I'm just not seeing it. If strangers knew I'm Hispanic, would they treat me differently? I dunno. When I help H with job apps and stuff though, I do hesitate to answer the question about ethnicity. I do wonder if it plays a roll.
So much yes to what you said in the race comment becole. What I notice the most is comments made by white people who definitely don't think they're racist, but their comments can range from completely tone dead to racist. My FIL is someone who comes to mind. He has no idea that his comments are wrong (trying to think of an example but blanking). I'm glad our generation is getting educated and exposed to systematic racism and what's wrong in comments. My church did a sermon or few sermons on race and I think it's really important - I wish more churches did something like that. It's stuff people need to hear.
If I hear one more thing from coworkers or acquaintances about the damn border wall.... This morning I was making fun of it all- saying he should build the Brent Spence before a border wall if he's al "America first." Then this coworker said "well they'll just come over and tear down the bridge if you build it so you have to build the wall first." I said "what bridge have illegal immigrants knocked down in the past?" I mean this was my face 😖
I saw a segment on world news a couple days ago, where David Muir came to the midwest, where the separation of votes between Trump and Hillary was like 100 votes, 1%, places like that. He asked people to grade Trump on his first 100 days. Like, 98% of those that gave Trump some kind of passing grade were A) white, B) old. Younger voters failed him, POC failed him. Most that passed him were blaming him not being able to accomplish things on the Dems. I'm like, so basically, it really doesn't matter what he says or does, nothing will change your mind, because you're just like him, except you're not rich - got it.
It's just like I have to remind my H not to cuss that the driver in front of him that cut him off is because they are a woman or an old person. He doesn't hate women generally... lol... but stereotypes are hard to break and even harder not to say when you're mad/ not thinking.
Yea good point becole. There are subtle things I hate that people say/do/think re. women.
1. Don't look me over/check me out like I'm here for you. (Obv not currently happening lol) 2. Calling women "gals" or "girls" 3. I'm blanking but there's more
Yea good point becole. There are subtle things I hate that people say/do/think re. women.
1. Don't look me over/check me out like I'm here for you. (Obv not currently happening lol) 2. Calling women "gals" or "girls" 3. I'm blanking but there's more
Asking anyone our age if they stay home. You would never ask a man if he works or not...
It's just like I have to remind my H not to cuss that the driver in front of him that cut him off is because they are a woman or an old person. He doesn't hate women generally... lol... but stereotypes are hard to break and even harder not to say when you're mad/ not thinking.
This is my DH too. He was raised to make assumptions and stereotype like that. His family (grandpa) calls middle eastern people sand n*****. :rolleyes: it drives me crazy. Thankfully DH does seem to listen to me when I correct him and he seems like he actually wants to change that way of thinking.
I have neither at this time, but I guess I have a heavier topic
I have a close group of online friends from cloth diapers. Racism comes up a lot in the group and they've opened my eyes to how prevalent it still is.
Yesterday people were sharing various situations they've been in/ seen and I realized I've really never witnessed anything like that. For example, cashiers treating a white customer and a black customer totally differently, being followed in stores and different treatment at restaurants. BUT, I always see Cincinnati and Ohio considered very racist places so I figure I'm probably not paying attention.
So I guess my question is are you all noticing and have you ever intervened?
Eeek this topic is always so awkward -- Yes I've experienced it myself before and you can only guess that I've definitely intervened before, especially when I see it happening to children its actually sickening. The time that stands out to me is when it happened to my brother and I when we were at a store that should not be named, let's just say I threatened to sue and start a social media campaign against the store and they stopped following my brother. It truly is the worst feeling in world.
I have neither at this time, but I guess I have a heavier topic
I have a close group of online friends from cloth diapers. Racism comes up a lot in the group and they've opened my eyes to how prevalent it still is.
Yesterday people were sharing various situations they've been in/ seen and I realized I've really never witnessed anything like that. For example, cashiers treating a white customer and a black customer totally differently, being followed in stores and different treatment at restaurants. BUT, I always see Cincinnati and Ohio considered very racist places so I figure I'm probably not paying attention.
So I guess my question is are you all noticing and have you ever intervened?
Eeek this topic is always so awkward -- Yes I've experienced it myself before and you can only guess that I've definitely intervened before, especially when I see it happening to children its actually sickening. The time that stands out to me is when it happened to my brother and I when we were at a store that should not be named, let's just say I threatened to sue and start a social media campaign against the store and they stopped following my brother. It truly is the worst feeling in world.
Ugh. I can't even imagine what you've been through. Thanks for being open to discussing it. Sounds like I definitely need to be more aware of my surroundings
H in the past, when he was very against staying here, mentioned that people here were very racist. He didn't site a specific situation he's been in. But he doesn't look white like DS & I do either, so I can believe it. I can't say I've noticed anything myself, against him, or anyone else. I don't know if me hanging out with a POC plays into them being treated differently, or if I'm just not seeing it. If strangers knew I'm Hispanic, would they treat me differently? I dunno. When I help H with job apps and stuff though, I do hesitate to answer the question about ethnicity. I do wonder if it plays a roll.
Totally random thought but for jobs it generally helps I check all the boxes FF -- the one advantage minorites have in the workplace -- especially if its federal contractor with an Affirmative Action plan (well until Trump removes that but for now it does help).
H in the past, when he was very against staying here, mentioned that people here were very racist. He didn't site a specific situation he's been in. But he doesn't look white like DS & I do either, so I can believe it. I can't say I've noticed anything myself, against him, or anyone else. I don't know if me hanging out with a POC plays into them being treated differently, or if I'm just not seeing it. If strangers knew I'm Hispanic, would they treat me differently? I dunno. When I help H with job apps and stuff though, I do hesitate to answer the question about ethnicity. I do wonder if it plays a roll.
Totally random thought but for jobs it generally helps I check all the boxes FF -- the one advantage minorites have in the workplace -- especially if its federal contractor with an Affirmative Action plan (well until Trump removes that but for now it does help).
We do answer honestly, because, why shouldn't we? But the thought that an employer would automatically write him off because of it crosses my mind all the time.
Eeek this topic is always so awkward -- Yes I've experienced it myself before and you can only guess that I've definitely intervened before, especially when I see it happening to children its actually sickening. The time that stands out to me is when it happened to my brother and I when we were at a store that should not be named, let's just say I threatened to sue and start a social media campaign against the store and they stopped following my brother. It truly is the worst feeling in world.
Ugh. I can't even imagine what you've been through. Thanks for being open to discussing it. Sounds like I definitely need to be more aware of my surroundings
of course--- my co-workers have been asking me about this all of sudden -- I think more people are aware overall so that's helpful.
It happens so often sometimes I'm numb to it which is so annoying. I guess that's why I'm so type A and aggressive with my career. My favorite moments is when I walk into a room full of white men and literally out rank them I feel like sticking my chest out and banging on it lol.
I'm glad all of you are so open to it and accept that white privilege exist. It's even worse for my H. I can't even imagine what he's encountered. He hates when we go to new neighborhoods or to peoples houses --- sad. In our old neighborhood our old neighbors called the cops on H on accident and they admitted they hadn't seen people like him in the neighborhood and totally apologized but damage is done you know.
H in the past, when he was very against staying here, mentioned that people here were very racist. He didn't site a specific situation he's been in. But he doesn't look white like DS & I do either, so I can believe it. I can't say I've noticed anything myself, against him, or anyone else. I don't know if me hanging out with a POC plays into them being treated differently, or if I'm just not seeing it. If strangers knew I'm Hispanic, would they treat me differently? I dunno. When I help H with job apps and stuff though, I do hesitate to answer the question about ethnicity. I do wonder if it plays a roll.
Totally random thought but for jobs it generally helps I check all the boxes FF -- the one advantage minorites have in the workplace -- especially if its federal contractor with an Affirmative Action plan (well until Trump removes that but for now it does help).
I was going to say this too... it's hard at our office to find and fill these positions with minorities so they will often interview anyone that is a minority. For where we work, we have a very diverse workforce, and by "diverse" I mean probably 20% and all ethnicities represented and not just like 2% like the rest of northern Kentucky. Here it's an issue of lack of applicants and not racism... but it's also probably racism that makes it that majority white people who have degrees in accounting/ finance/law/ CPAs...
Ugh. I can't even imagine what you've been through. Thanks for being open to discussing it. Sounds like I definitely need to be more aware of my surroundings
of course--- my co-workers have been asking me about this all of sudden -- I think more people are aware overall so that's helpful.
It happens so often sometimes I'm numb to it which is so annoying. I guess that's why I'm so type A and aggressive with my career. My favorite moments is when I walk into a room full of white men and literally out rank them I feel like sticking my chest out and banging on it lol.
I'm glad all of you are so open to it and accept that white privilege exist. It's even worse for my H. I can't even imagine what he's encountered. He hates when we go to new neighborhoods or to peoples houses --- sad. In our old neighborhood our old neighbors called the cops on H on accident and they admitted they hadn't seen people like him in the neighborhood and totally apologized but damage is done you know.
On accident? And "people like him". That angers me. Hopefully our generation can be the one to really reduce this crap way of thinking. We are all human.
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