Moving to Ohio, without my husband.

[heatherj9603]

Okay so I've been thinking of a way to post and reply since yesterday. First off, I am so sorry you are going throubh this. When dh and I were first married, we had to move to Tennessee for 3 years. I was MISERABLE there. No friends or family. I was only 19 and had never lived away from them. I had lived In the same county my entire life. I was so happy when we moved back to indiana, but it just wasn't the same anymore. Dh hated Indiana, he missed the south. But we were done with Tennessee. 6 years after moving back, we moved to South Carolina. I honestly couldn't be any more happy. But we moved somewhere that we BOTH chose and loved.

My husband and I started our relationship long distance. We made it work, but I hated it. We've been together 12 1/2 years. When I go back to indiana to visit my family for a week, by the end of the week Im practically sprinting off the plane and throwing elbows to get to him quickly.

That being said, and I 100% do not want to come out the wrong way, as this is your decision. I'm not trying to be judgmental or anything like that. But I wouldn't live apart from him if I didnt have to. So, I would really evaluate if your happiness in Ohio would balance out your unhappiness being away from your dh. It doesn't sound like either scenario gets you exactly what you want, and it is only temporary either way.

But long distance can work. But like others have said, communication is key. At first it will be easy, but as time goes on you might find your phone calls lessen. Just don't let that Happen. Write him a nice card or note. He sends flowers to the house. Skype/FaceTime to show what your doing. rent the same movie and watch at the same time, read the same books, etc so you have things to discuss. Send a random text with an I love you.

[MrsC0617]

Lurking to say I'm so sorry for your troubles @whitney.

I've never lived away from DH since we've been married but we were in a long distance relationship for nearly 5 years. We lived on opposite ends of the country (him CA, me NY). This meant we could only see each other every few months. It was so difficult but we loved and trusted each other and knew that our time together would be very special.

I now live in CA, and it seems like a world away from my friends and family. As much as I love my "new" life (although I've been here nearly 9 years) I totally get the feeling of wanting to go home. I still feel that way sometimes. You have to do what's best for you. It may be a challenge for awhile but have faith that you're strong and determined. I see good things in your future. Take care of yourself!!

[sko14]

W, I've been meaning to add my 2 cents to this not because I have experience in this exact situation but because I feel for you. Its a tough decision and whatever you decide will be right for you.
For the last 3 years DH has been travelling 3500 ish miles from home for a week/ two weeks/ or a month at a time (again, totally not the same) but I'm the same way. I don't want to leave our home, our family or our area so we chose to live this way (temporarily) does it make me crazy some days? absolutely. Somedays I miss him so much it hurts and sometimes I don't. I got used to doing things on my own and being super independent(Because I had no choice to) But I am confident we're doing this to better our lives and have to be positive because that's just how it is right now. Knowing you have family, and a support system to help you through the next 18 months would make me feel like you have this under control.. whatever you choose I'm sure its the right path because you're not jumping into this without thought. Your DH is supportive, he knows you'd be happy elsewhere even at the risk of him being without you and that matters. Hope my brain fog didn't get the best of me and you understand what I was trying to get at!!

[luckypanda]

Creepy hugs Good luck in your decision making!

[ohinvrtedworld]

Whit, I am so sorry for everything going on and that you even had to make these difficult decisions. I don't have any good wisdom or experience to pass your way, but T&Ps for you guys to figure out what works for you.

[snakefisherbub]

you've been given lots of great advice. Good luck but you'll find a way to make it work. *hugs*

[missjenniebean]

No experience or advice but creepy internet hugs for you and your spouse.

[hydrangea1019]

I'm sorry you're having to go through this.

DH and I lived about 7 hours away from each other for about a 6 month period. I'm not going to lie. It sucked!

Before he left we scheduled weekends to meet at my parents (half way point) so we'd have meet ups to look forward too.

Skype was also a big thing for us. We'd do video calls at least every other day so we could see each other. Just making sure to make time for each other and making communication a top priority.

That first goodbye moment was terrible, but when he finally came home I think it brought us closer together.

[MissMusic]

I don't know your whole backstory, but just from this post I feel bad for you. It sounds like you made a big change that really backfired. I've made several moves with MH, the latest one hasn't worked out so well, so I understand partially. Its so tough to make those kinds of choices.

I lived away from DH for 3 months, right after our 1 yr wedding anniversary. I knew it was temporary but it was still hard.

No great advice, but creepy lurker webz hugs.

[traversity]

I have nothing that pp have already said, but big huge hugs you are going through this right now.