Squishy I think I'm just feeling neurotic about bonding with baby. I am a ok with simply accessorizing with baby! (Totally slaughtered that spelling)
We adopted DS1 when he was 2.5 years old but I was also seriously worried about bonding and attachment. I wore him in a meitai as much as possible and it REALLY helped both of us. It was so hard because he had symptoms of RAD and a lot of other things going on, but just spend time with baby, wear baby, do skin-to-skin, etc and you'll do great!
One thing I'd suggest doing is limit who else can do these things other than you and your SO until you feel bonded. Family might not understand but in the grand scheme of things, what's a few weeks or months when it comes to the mental health of your family?
I LOVE talking about attachment and bonding and after weathering some pretty severe things with DS1, I understand the fears and have lived them, so I'm here to talk if you need someone to talk to!
ETA: I know you didn't ask for advice so sorry! I just know the really different fears and emotions that come with adoption vs birth child. It's a different world that you can't fully understand unless you're in that world.
Last Edit: Oct 14, 2015 11:06:46 GMT -5 by mrsslick
Little Slick - fell in love 6/26/12, a forever family 11/26/12, finally home 12/6/12! The moment I really became a mama: mrs-slick.blogspot.com/2013/01/mama.html
Post by Maggie0424 on Oct 14, 2015 12:02:13 GMT -5
Can someone please explain the letdown button to me on the PISA? Are you supposted to push it when the milk starts flowing or just let the pump cycle through until it automatically gets to the letdown cycle? I'm so confused. I feel like I get better results when it's full-strength.
Married July 2009. I'm 36, DH 42. started TTC right away PG#1 BFP 7/21/09 DS m/c 10/6/09 EDD 4/26/10 Bleeding for a year, DX with uterine polyps. Had hysteroscopy. PG#2 BFP 11/2/11 DD born 7/12/12 PG#3 BFP 7/12/14 DS mm/c 9/2/14 DX with Trisomy 22 EDD 3/28/15 PG#4 BFP 1/14/14 EDD 9/29/15 DS arrived on due date! Tag me as punchyterkai
Can someone please explain the letdown button to me on the PISA? Are you supposted to push it when the milk starts flowing or just let the pump cycle through until it automatically gets to the letdown cycle? I'm so confused. I feel like I get better results when it's full-strength.
The two stage thing is set up so that it replicates how a baby nurses off of your boob. The initial quicker stage when you first turn it on replicates what the baby does at the beginning to try and stimulate your letdown. Short quick little stimulating sucks. Once the milk actually starts flowing you press the letdown button and it'll slow the pump down to a normal sucking rhythm. Does that make sense?
Dr says to use alcohol on Lucy's belly button. There is still a piece inside that needs to dry out & fall off. We are supposed to go back Friday to have them put silver oxide on it if alcohol doesn't work.
The two stage thing is set up so that it replicates how a baby nurses off of your boob. The initial quicker stage when you first turn it on replicates what the baby does at the beginning to try and stimulate your letdown. Short quick little stimulating sucks. Once the milk actually starts flowing you press the letdown button and it'll slow the pump down to a normal sucking rhythm. Does that make sense?
+1. I start on the quick mode and hit the button when my milk is coming out.
+2 - this is what the LC told me. She said its one of the features that she likes best on the PISA over some of the other pumps.
Feeding question, I'm exclusively pumping and baby is getting breastmilk because she is just not interested in the boob after we originally had to supplement and now she is used to the bottle. My question is how many ounces should she get per feeding? We started out with 40 ml according to the pediatrician because she was a preemie and we needed to get her weight up. Now she's over her birth weight by a couple ounces and doesn't go back to the doctor until her 2 month checkup. She easily takes 2 to 3 ounces now. Should I offer more or is that enough? When do I raise the amount? Thanks in advance don't want to have to call the doctor if there is an easy answer.
@catvaughn - We're in a similar situation. At our two week visit , she was taking 2-3 oz which seemed like a lot, so I checked with the pedi. She said to offer the top end, so 3oz per feeding for now. If she starts wanting more after the 3, she suggested bumping up to 3.5-4 oz per offering and so on. She said that, especially at this age, as long as they aren't spitting up a lot, there's really no such thing as eating too much, so just keep bumping as needed. And this was after she'd gained 2/3 of a pound in a week, so I think it's totally fine to give as much as they'll take (again, as long as they aren't spitting up a lot).
frantastic 24/oz a day. I think I may be depriving my little guy. We are only giving him about 18oz/day. How much did DS weigh? My little guy was a month early but he is four weeks old now and that's what we give him. Maybe I should be giving him more. He is still gaining weight so that is good. Sometimes he seems like he could eat more but sometimes I think he just really likes to suck. If I give him his soother he seems happy most of the time. It is hard to know how much to give him. I know that bottle fed babies are more prone to over eating.
So DS's umbilical stump fell off but inside his belly button it's all gunky and nasty. DD's wasn't like this at all.
Am I supposed to clean it with soap and water? Alcohol?
This is how ds's was also, the doctor had to take a thing and "seal" it off. I can't remember what it was called. But it "burns it to seal it, but doesn't hurt them at all" he didn't cry or anything but it was better a couple days later.
TTMA eye gunk. Baby has some sleepy type gunk on his left eye almost every time he wakes up. I read it is ok as long as the whites of his eyes are still white and not red. I clean it off with a cotton ball (sometimes dry, sometimes wet depending on the gunk wetness). How long might this last? Anything else we can do to help him?
We are going to ask the pedi tomorrow, just curious if any of you have experience.
TTMA eye gunk. Baby has some sleepy type gunk on his left eye almost every time he wakes up. I read it is ok as long as the whites of his eyes are still white and not red. I clean it off with a cotton ball (sometimes dry, sometimes wet depending on the gunk wetness). How long might this last? Anything else we can do to help him?
We are going to ask the pedi tomorrow, just curious if any of you have experience.
F Gets that sometimes. The pedi said it is a clogged duct she says to use a wet, warm compress and massage gently downward and you wipe it away.
I was thinking of this the other day. G will be 4 weeks tomorrow and is already working on some serious neck control, so I think I'm breaking out the mat then.
It's important for breastfed babies mostly as formula has it already added I believe. Not sure though but if you are ff you can check the tin and see the nutritional info.
How long is too long to let them sleep between feeds at night? Kiddo is 4 weeks, and just slept almost 6 hours straight. I did have an alarm set to wake her to feed/make sure she was alive, but I apparently turned it off and went back to sleep myself (mother of the year award? Check.) She has been gaining weight well. The last time we saw the pedi he said that we could "plan on" feeds every 4 hours, but now I'm not sure if he meant that I should wake her then, or if that's when she would want to eat anyway. For the most part she's been waking on her own every 2.5-3 hours up until now. We don't see the pedi again for another month, and I'd feel silly calling about this. Thoughts?
ETA: I think someone earlier in the thread said something to the extent of "dear God no, don't wake them," but I wanted to make sure that doubling her sleep time all of a sudden isn't a crisis. I feel guilty that she went so long.
How long is too long to let them sleep between feeds at night? Kiddo is 4 weeks, and just slept almost 6 hours straight. I did have an alarm set to wake her to feed/make sure she was alive, but I apparently turned it off and went back to sleep myself (mother of the year award? Check.) She has been gaining weight well. The last time we saw the pedi he said that we could "plan on" feeds every 4 hours, but now I'm not sure if he meant that I should wake her then, or if that's when she would want to eat anyway. For the most part she's been waking on her own every 2.5-3 hours up until now. We don't see the pedi again for another month, and I'd feel silly calling about this. Thoughts?
ETA: I think someone earlier in the thread said something to the extent of "dear God no, don't wake them," but I wanted to make sure that doubling her sleep time all of a sudden isn't a crisis. I feel guilty that she went so long.
Unless you have weight gain concerns, DON'T WAKE THE BABY.
And cripes. My 3 yo didn't even sleep 6 hours straight last night...
Post by cheeseandrice on Oct 17, 2015 6:36:58 GMT -5
DD1 is actually a really good sleeper and was after about a month or so. She'd go 2-3 hours and then bam. 5. It may be a fluke or it may be them just getting the hang of it. Have you noticed feedings shifting to day at all? Lo would start drinking a little more during the day before she'd sleep longer stretches at night.
We never really intentionally pushed it all that much with DD1. Baby lying on your chest counts. Or if they have control while being held upright or on your shoulder.
Honestly I was always way more worried about giving her poor back of the head a break and flat spot than actual neck strength
I will say that letting her lie on her stomach seemed to help with her gas too.
How long is too long to let them sleep between feeds at night? Kiddo is 4 weeks, and just slept almost 6 hours straight. I did have an alarm set to wake her to feed/make sure she was alive, but I apparently turned it off and went back to sleep myself (mother of the year award? Check.) She has been gaining weight well. The last time we saw the pedi he said that we could "plan on" feeds every 4 hours, but now I'm not sure if he meant that I should wake her then, or if that's when she would want to eat anyway. For the most part she's been waking on her own every 2.5-3 hours up until now. We don't see the pedi again for another month, and I'd feel silly calling about this. Thoughts?
ETA: I think someone earlier in the thread said something to the extent of "dear God no, don't wake them," but I wanted to make sure that doubling her sleep time all of a sudden isn't a crisis. I feel guilty that she went so long.
Our pedi told us that as long as there are no big issues (jaundice, etc), it was fine for G to go up to 5 hours at night as long as she was getting good feedings in during the day. I think as long as you are past the initial rather sleep than eat phase of the first week or so, it's totally fine. We stopped setting the alarm after the first post birth visit.
Not sure if this has been covered but I have a question about the rock n play. Is it safe for unsupervised sleep? She hates the bassinet and I'm not ready for her to be in the crib yet. I think I've seen a couple people here say they have their LOs in a rnp next to the bed. I don't want to do anything unsafe but I also would like both her and I to get some sleep at night.
This is what we have:
Totally fine, it's really just an elevated bassinet that cuddles them a little. Pedi asks every visit where she is sleeping and what she's sleeping in and has no issue with it.
@nochill - just watch in a few months for when your LO starts to roll. I found DD face down in it once (scary!!), and that's when we knew she couldn't be in it anymore. Also, I put it so the lower end butted up to our bed. I felt more comfortable with it that direction. I also squeezed one of our king sized pillows between the end of the Rnp and our bed. I was always afraid she'd slide out.
Well I am joining the my baby only wants to sleep on me club. I always said I would never sleep with my baby in bed with me. Well last night he slept on my chest from 12:30-3:30am. I am surprised that I slept as well. Probably more surprised because I never can sleep on my back only my side. Wish LO would be happy sleeping in his bassinet but I think it is to much space, he likes to feel more enclosed. He can sleep on me, in his swing and in his car seat.
Haven't read ahead but maybe try rolled receiving blankets on either side it may make him feel more confined.
Post by Squishy622 on Oct 18, 2015 22:05:34 GMT -5
@nochill Both our twins sleep almost full time in RnPs. The official SIDS prevention recommendation is to place them flat on their back to sleep, so it's about your personal threshold for the risk.
How do your babies fall asleep? Are you still holding/rocking/feeding them until they are out, or will they fall asleep on their own (maybe drowsy but awake?) in whatever their bed is? (RnP, PnP, bassinet, etc?)
@saveourship we did the paper towel thing for a year, I think we could have stopped sooner but since I was SAH it worked. The only wipes that we can use consistently are the up and up unscented. (Not the sensitive those still have a scent.)
We could use other brands/types but not consistently.
How do your babies fall asleep? Are you still holding/rocking/feeding them until they are out, or will they fall asleep on their own (maybe drowsy but awake?) in whatever their bed is? (RnP, PnP, bassinet, etc?)
At night, we put her in the bassinet and she puts herself to sleep. During the day, we hold her until she falls asleep.
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